Coffee (241 reviews)

Chin Chin Coffee Classic

Chin Chin Coffee Classic

Something about this coffee takes me back in time, to a time that I never knew. The sunny 1970's. With every sip I feel my hair get greasier and my pants get wider. I feel the shag in the carpet get shaggier and all of a sudden all the walls have mirrors on them.

This coffee is sweet coffee with cream in it. Deal with it. Want black coffee? Get the hell out of my house. Get the hell out of my wood paneled house that all of a sudden plays nothing but Abba songs. It's not too sweet and neither the sugar nor the cream detracts from a decent coffee. I think some might think that it's too sweet but it's not going to put air holes in me ol' chompers. Is it going to win any awards? Probably not but I'm not going to turn it down when offered. Who is offering me Taiwanese coffee drinks in indestructible steel cans? No one. I need to find new friends.

Website
http://enogee.com/Drink.php?ord=Bst&Drink=21&Title=ChinChin_-_Vitality_Boost_energy_drink_review
Country
Taiwan
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Coffee
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on March 21st, 2018
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Mr. Brown Iced Coffee Vanilla

Mr. Brown Iced Coffee Vanilla

Mr. Brown, it’s so nice of you to return. It's been a while. How long has it been, old friend? Since 2013? Well it has been too long. Please, take a seat. What have you got for us today? Vanilla iced coffee? Well why don't you pour us a couple glasses and we'll get down to business.

This is nice. I see you haven't lost your edge in this game. This is good. It’s the same great coffee taste with the smoothness of some vanilla. I'm surprised you hadn't thought of this earlier. Just the right amount of sugar to have to be drinkable and still using those indestructible, adorable cans, I see. Mr. Brown. You've done it again. I don't know how you do it, but you've got quite the empire on your hands.

Thank you for stopping by and giving me a sneak peek at this new little number. I'm sure it will do very well for you, as the rest of your little drinks do. Get home safely and please, Mr. Brown, try not to murder anyone on the way home, alright, friend? I'll talk to you soon.

Website
http://www.mrbrown.com.tw
Country
Taiwan
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Coffee
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on March 19th, 2018
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Sail Away Nitro Cold Brew Coffee Sea Salt & Caramel

Sail Away Nitro Cold Brew Coffee Sea Salt & Caramel

If you are offering me hot coffee, it better have some sort of fancy flavoring to it, or else I am more than likely not going to drink it. Well, that just sounded rude. I’m not going to slap the mug out of your hand, or throw the hot liquid onto your person. I will simply say no thank you. If pressed I may add that I’m not a big coffee drinker. The thing is that while I’m not a fan of hot coffee, I do enjoy iced coffee, especially if it is cold brew. To me they are beverages that are in the same family, but have chosen different paths in life. Cold brew is simply a smoother coffee that even when unsweetened isn’t as bitter and harsh as its hot sibling. It’s a more pleasurable experience for me, and it shines a light on the aspects of coffee that I enjoy and hides the others in the shadows. Sail Away takes things one step further and uses nitrogen in their brewing with makes the coffee which makes it frothier/foamy. It gives it a texture similar to a latte, but without the “milk” in it. That certainly helps with my drinking experience. Also, it apparently gives the illusion of sweetness, or so I’ve read. Anything that tricks me thinking something is sweet without sugar (or more importantly zero calorie sweeteners) is a plus. Overall it magnifies the coffee’s actual flavor, or so I see it.

I’m not a huge caramel fan, so lucky for me that flavor isn’t very strong in here. Nor is the sea salt. Both are there in hints only, letting the coffee itself carry most of the workload. That’s the way I want it. For someone who isn’t a huge coffee fan, I still want my coffee drinks to actually taste like coffee. It’s the base and I want it to shine in a glorious way and that is what Sail Away has done with this product.

Website
http://sailawaycoffee.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Natural Cane Sugar
Categories
Coffee
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on March 18th, 2018
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Sail Away Nitro Cold Brew Coffee Sweetened

Sail Away Nitro Cold Brew Coffee Sweetened

Darren, get over here. You're fired if you don't get me that Johnson report. Darren, you had two weeks to work on that report and there are jobs on the line. What do you have to say for yourself? What's this? Coffee? You think that this single can of coffee is going to make up for the eight people that might have to lose their jobs because you were too busy, what? What were you doing instead of working on that report? Chat Roulette? Darren. I don't even know what to say. I'm actually quite sure that it is all dongs, Darren. No, I'm pretty sure that it is. I've been there. All dongs. Welp, I might as well try this coffee.

This is decent. Maybe not decent enough to save all eight jobs but enough that I'm in a good mood and might give you a four hour extension if you assure me that you will get it in by eight tonight. You know what? And you have to wash my car. Yeah, I said it. Wash my car, Darren. This weekend. Come over to my estate and wash my car. I'm sticking my neck out for you because you're our most faithful employee clocking in at nine months, a pathetic stat. Let me have another sip of this here coffee. It's good, Darren. I don't typically drink coffee with just sugar but this is sweetened just enough to take the bitter edge off regular cold brew. I'm going to have no problem drinking this as a moderate coffee drinker. I can, and will drink this whole can while you get to your desk and get cracking on that report. If you have any more of this I'll take it. Let's consider it a "backroom deal" that allows you to keep your cushy job here.

Website
http://sailawaycoffee.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Natural Cane Sugar
Categories
Coffee
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on March 12th, 2018
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Dunkin' Donuts Iced Coffee Girl Scouts Peanut Butter Cookie

Dunkin' Donuts Iced Coffee Girl Scouts Peanut Butter Cookie

More Girl Scout cookies. The dense, fat kid in me enjoys Girl Scout cookies. Keep 'em coming. If I didn't have self-respect, I could crush a whole box. I mean, there are only like twenty cookies in each box, right? No problem. Dare me. Don't dare me. I don't need all those cookies. I have liquid cookies now.

With all due respect, this didn't really taste too much like the cookies. I could not pinpoint the flavor. If you (generously) bought this and put it in front of me, I would not be able to tell you what it was. That being said, it was not bad. It was sweet but not tooth-shatteringly sweet. Since I couldn't tell you what it was, I am not married to this guy. Between this and the previously drank Thin Mint, I would take the Thin Mint. Between the Thin Mint and the standard mocha swirl that I like to get, I would get the mocha. A limited time offer? It doesn't bother me at all.

Website
http://www.dunkindonuts.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Not Listed
Categories
Coffee
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on March 12th, 2018
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Starbucks Doubleshot Protein Dark Chocolate

Starbucks Doubleshot Protein Dark Chocolate

Doubleshot has a double meaning apparently. It can either mean coffee and energy, or as with this product coffee and protein. I think I would have preferred the former. I was really into the idea of dark chocolate coffee. I mean I’ve had dark chocolate mocha before and it’s nearly always great. The thing is Starbucks tends to go a bit overboard for my tastes when they introduce milk into their prepackaged beverages, and the addition of protein amplifies even that. This really just tastes like a dark chocolate milk with a splash of coffee in it. The opposite would have been more appreciated. I suppose you know what you’re getting into when you are drinking a whey protein drink, but I was just hoping for something that didn’t taste like it came directly from a dark brown cows udder. The upside of this is that it is sweetened with a combo of sugar and erythritol and I drank the whole thing without realizing there was a zero calorie sweetener involved. That always gets a thumbs up from me.

Website
http://www.starbucks.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Coffee, Diet
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on March 9th, 2018
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Dunkin' Donuts Iced Coffee Thin Mint

Dunkin' Donuts Iced Coffee Thin Mint

Ahh limited edition flavors. They come and go so frequently that I don't know if things came or went. When it comes time to try Girl Scout Thin Mint iced coffee, I'm in. Sure, Samosa is working its way up the chart to my heart; Thin Mint is still on top. I drink one mocha iced coffee from Dunkin' per week so to add a little mint to it is a nice little gift.

In execution it's a little strange. You "get it" but you "get it" like when you see art and you understand what they're going for but it's not something that's for you. You taste the chocolate and that's fine but the mint is a little strange. I drank it and, you know, I might drink it again but it's not my favorite. Something was just a tiny bit off and I think the mint is close to the original but there is some sort of chemical imbalance that throws it off.


Big ups to The Impulsive Buy for the tip.

Website
http://www.dunkindonuts.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Not Listed
Categories
Coffee
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on March 9th, 2018
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Sail Away Nitro Cold Brew Coffee Unsweetened

Sail Away Nitro Cold Brew Coffee Unsweetened

I was dreading this for the following reasons. Nitro coffee murders my nerves. Other people's cold brew murders my nerves. Unsweetened coffee is unpalatable to me. Three good reasons, right? Well this is either really good coffee or I'm used to it. I'm slanting a little towards the former than the latter.

This was good. You could taste the roast of the beans and it wasn't terribly strong. I'm feeling it in my fingers as I mash these keys faster than my mind can function but I don't have so much extra energy that my body is contorting into shapes that are foreign to the limbs performing the actions.

As a coffee, it's fairly straightforward. No extra spices or flavors, just black coffee. I would say, "no frills" but to make coffee this decent takes skill in itself. Known coffee disliker me had no problem drinking a third of the can which, for no reason other I don't want to visit the moon today, is all I will be drinking. Whatever happens to the dude that drinks the other 2/3 of it, well, I'm not his dad. He can do what he wants. Maybe he'll get a million energies and go build a gazebo or something. Just be safe, man. It's slurring my keys like someone replaced the coffee with coffee-flavored alcohol. Drunk gazeboing cannot be a good idea. Speed squares and measurements will earn a better result than "the quickness."

Website
http://sailawaycoffee.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Coffee
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on March 7th, 2018
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Starbucks Frappuccino Vanilla

Starbucks Frappuccino Vanilla

I went to Target last week to get some supplies for the sudden cold that overtook my body and saw that they were having a sale on a bunch of their beverages (buy $20 worth get a $5 gift card). I decided to use this as an opportunity to fill in some Thirsty Dudes gaps. I was pretty surprised to realize that we had not reviewed this one yet. In fact, I just checked our Master List for the third time, because I swore I had written about this little one before.

Let me start by saying there are two ways that I really like coffee; a nice smooth cold brew and a dessert coffee. This falls into the later. I like to see coffee as a treat and not just a daily routine. That may be because I would fall into the large percentile of Americans who are obese if I were to drink it all the time, since I generally like it sweet. This is like someone made a nice vanilla milkshake and threw in a shot of espresso. Just as they did so the phone rang and it was their mother, whose calls that kept forgetting to return and it turned into a long conversation about how well their siblings were doing and when are they going to meet someone nice and settle down. By the end of this exhausting conversation the milkshake had gone and melted on them. Whatever, they’ll drink it anyways. Now you don’t have to go through that whole ordeal to have this treat. You can keep dodging those calls and just grab a bottle of this from the store. It’s milky, It’s sweet and it lightly tastes like coffee. It’s a dessert drink.

Website
http://www.starbucks.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Coffee
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on March 4th, 2018
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Stok Cold Brew Vanilla

Stok Cold Brew Vanilla

I drink one cup of coffee per day. I do not need it. I don't know why I do it. I might think I'm an adult but I could throw a baseball in any direction and have five people say that I am a fraud of a man.

This drink. I didn't know that it was vanilla as I graciously pulled it off the shelf. I did when I unwrapped it and then again as I drank it. The vanilla doesn't kill the drink and, if anything it smooths it out like any good, self-respecting vanilla would do. I don't know if there was milk in it but it could have been the vanilla that made it have that smoothness. They were spot on with their "Not Too Sweet" title, too because it's not tooth gratingly sweet. All of this while still retaining a good coffee flavor. All wrapped up in a nice little package.

One thing to note is that they must be making a hell of a concentrate to start off with. They tout a ten hour brew which is fourteen hours shorter than the cold brew I make and arguably as strong. They might be up to something in that facility. Take note. Sorcery perhaps?

Website
http://stokcoffee.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Coffee
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on February 20th, 2018
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