Iced Tea (907 reviews)

Wahaha Russian Style

Wahaha Russian Style

Come on, dude. Let me down. I don't think that I deserve this. I swear I didn't steal that pack of gum. I've got like thirty dollars in my wallet. Why would I steal a one dollar pack of gum? Dollar fifty? Come on dude. This is a dollar gum and you know it. You're just ripping people off with that. I know people love it. It's a classic gum but that's no reason to overcharge just because you can. Let's just get back to the issue at hand here. Why am I being drawn and quartered? I told you I wasn't stealing that gum. I had some on me that you just so happen to be a brand you sell. Seriously, I'm telling you the truth. Man, this reminds me of that strange tea I had. What? Oh, now you're concerned about my opinion. Well I'll tell you but I would like you to let me go. I'll pay you double for the gum I didn't steal just so you let me down. This thing pulling me is getting quite uncomfortable.

Alright, so I met up with some friends and one gave me a tea that I couldn't read a single word to. Naturally I just drank it because I was thirsty. I took a sip and it tasted like someone poured jasmine tea into a beer and sweetened it with honey. I don't drink so this kind of took me for a loop. Why don't I drink? It's because I don't want to and don't think that I need to, that's why. Back to the tea, I love tea. I love it. When you pair it with beer, though, it goes down an infinite amount of pegs. When you have a nice jasmine tea sweetened with honey, though, it's a good thing. So I'm torn, much like I feel like my limbs are slowly ripping from my socket all over some stupid gum.

Oh, what? I don't know where it came from, maybe some Asian market. So what do you say, pal? Can you let me down? I've been good to you. I've promised you more money that you deserve. I've told you a tale of my past. How about you let me down? No? Well what do you want to talk about while my balls and sockets say goodbye? This is unbearable but I give you full credit for doing it with horses and not some medieval apparatus. Credit where credit's due, right?

Website
http://en.wahaha.com.cn/
Country
China
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on October 31st, 2013
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VitaLife Cold Brewed Tea Peach Ginger

VitaLife Cold Brewed Tea Peach Ginger

VitaLife is another brand that falls under the Aldi umbrella. Years ago that would have meant that is was probably chock full of corn syrup and other nonsense, but since the company went organic awhile back you are generally assured that you are getting a somewhat quality product.

Now if you have been paying attention to American society in the past five years you are probably aware of the trend of cold brew (which I totally back). It’s generally used for coffee and it makes the caffeinated beverage smoother. Some companies have expanded this practice into the brewing of teas as well, and it has similar results. This is a very smooth tea, especially since it is unsweetened. Okay, it has 3g of sugar in it but it comes from fruit and not processed sugar. This is so smooth that it kind of resembles a tea flavored water, but somehow is very flavorful. The thing is there appears to be no actual tea leaves used to make this and it it’s all herbal tea, which really doesn’t seem like tea to me. It has ginger, apple bits, hibiscus, papaya, rose hip, pink peppercorns, orange blossoms, rose pedals and peach juice concentrate in it. Overall it’s delicious. I do wish there was a bit of actual tea in there to give it a little bite. The more I drink the more the smoothness makes it seem like I’m not really drinking anything. It’s a strange beverage that I really enjoyed at first, but has diminishing returns. I will need to experiment more.

Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on October 29th, 2018
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Vita Lina Flaxseed Drink Guava

Vita Lina Flaxseed Drink Guava

Everyone thought that Stephen Lina and his father were charlatans because they sold heath tonics out of a little cart. They were early wave traveling sales men, but unfortunately for them some men had come before them trying to make a quick buck by swindling people out of their money by offering them what were essentials vials of dyed sugar water. The Linas were not con artists like these others. They had similar selling tactics as their peers, but their product actually worked. You see Mr. Lina was a scientist and he had discovered the healing properties of flaxseed. He knew it could be used to help combat ailments that would in the future come be known as cholesterol, diabetes, cancer, constipation, menopause, heart disease and depression.

Mr. Lina could have easily made it public knowledge that flaxseeds could help cure so many ailments, but then his family would stay exactly where they were: in the poor house. He had promised a better wife for his family, so he made up a whole mess of flaxseed tonics, loaded up the family cart and went out to make his fortune with his son. It’s just unfortunate that the time that they chose to go sell their wares was the same time that people across the country were getting fed up with scam artists ripping them off and not healing their problems. The Linas were chased out of every town they went to. They never once even sold a bottle of their flaxseed tonic. Broken and beaten the two men returned home with their tales between their legs to live out the rest of their life in poverty.

It wasn’t until over a hundred years had passed that Stephen’s great grandson David’s interest was piqued when his grandmother told him tales of the traveling Linas. He found his great great grandfather’s notebooks in an old trunk and used his fancy college science degree to make up a batch of “Vita Lina” as his ancestors had called it. It tasted okay, but it needed a little something. He just happened to have some iced tea and a can of guava juice on hand, for some unknown reason, so he added it to the mixture. That was exactly what was needed. What his grandfather had once called a tonic was now a tasty beverage that was most definitely marketable. The guava and iced tea masked most of the flavor of the flaxseed, but it was still slightly there. Nothing about the flavor was offensive at all. In fact if one were unaware of the flaxseed content, they would never be the wiser. The consistency was a bit off though. It was a little thick, our young scientist’s girlfriend most than once announced that it felt like she was drinking body wash when she would take a sip. David didn’t think it was that thick, but he gave it to her that it was thicker than most drinks in a strange way. David eventually teamed up with Simply Originals, to distribute his beverages, and finally his family started to see some money from their ancestor’s ideas. It was a good day.

Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea, Juice, Other/Weird
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on April 23rd, 2012
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Vita Lina Flaxseed Drink Mango

Vita Lina Flaxseed Drink Mango

Something happened around the turn of the century where people started to give up on bars of soap. Suddenly they weren’t good enough for people. Maybe people thought they couldn’t get them clean enough or something, either way people left the bars on the shelf and America embraced the new product known as body wash. I am a grown ass man and I will confidently admit that I use body wash. The reason I do is that I have some that smells like red licorice and the aroma is delicious. That really plays no part in this tale though. The important thing here is that the body wash empire got greedy. They were blinded by the new trend and in their minds the entire world would soon turn to their products and bar soap would become obsolete. As a result many of them purchased the ingredients needed to make the wash in obscene surplus. Now that a decade has passed the body wash folk are realizing that they have reached their limit of customers. Those who are not already using their products will cling to their bars of soap until the day they die. The problem was they were stuck with enough warehouses of materials to fill a smaller state, like Rhode Island. Sure they were able to sell the “soap” ingredients to some of the bar companies at a loss, but what to do with the “gel” ingredients? After many late night board meetings a solution was thought up; they would sell the ingredient, which are perfectly safe to consume, to the beverage industry to make drinks with interesting textures.

Vita Lina jumped at the chance to ride the crest of a possible trend of drinks with strange consistencies. They released this line of flaxseed drinks that has a viscosity that falls somewhere between body wash and a normal drink. It doesn’t taste soapy in any way, but the texture is there, and it’s weird. I personally like it a lot. It’s interesting, and I notice that I take smaller sips than normal. A few friends who tried it were not so into it. They couldn’t get past the texture to even contemplate the flavor, which has a nice subtle mango quality to it. I can’t blame them. Even though I like the consistency, I do find it distracting from the flavor. I feel like I can taste texture in this drink, and since I’m not a robot that is impossible. It says it’s a drink, but since there is tea in it, I consider it an iced tea. Truth be told it tastes more like a drink that is not overly sweetened than tea.

Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea, Juice, Other/Weird
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on May 7th, 2012
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Vita Lina Flaxseed Drink Pineapple

Vita Lina Flaxseed Drink Pineapple

The consistency of Vita Lina drinks is so strange. From the look of it sloshing around the bottle you wouldn’t think that it flowed any different from a random drink. You don’t really notice the strangeness until it’s in your mouth. It’s not syrupy. It’s more like a watered down gel, but the viscosity of it is not something that is normal in drinks. I would like to say that I got over it and that it makes the drink fun, but this is my third bottle of their products and I still am hesitant to drink them. I know they taste great, but the consistency just throws me off. It’s not gross. It’s just weird.

As far as the flavor goes, this has a real pineapple flavor to it, without the harsh edge of the fruit. It tastes like of like it should be a pineapple “drink” and not juice. I don’t mean that in a bad way though. Sometimes pineapple juice can be far too acidic to drink a lot of. Once you convince yourself that you’re over the texture of this, you can drink this all day long.

Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea, Juice, Other/Weird
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on July 28th, 2012
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Vita Coco Pure Coconut Water With Lemon Tea

Vita Coco Pure Coconut Water With Lemon Tea

Since the ingredients are listed as “Tea(water, tea)” I don’t believe this is the case, but this really tastes like a kettle of coconut water was boiled and then some tea bags were steeped in it and finally a healthy squirt (or two or five) of lemon was shot into it. The flavors are so seamless that it doesn’t feel like the finished products could have just been mixed together. It’s certainly an interesting flavor that I could see myself enjoying on all of those trips I take to tropical locations, where I do nothing but lounge in the sun staring out in to the ocean, but since I don’t ever do those things, I don’t know when I would drink this. It’s really good, but it also feels like it has a very specific purpose. It’s the kind of beverage that it just feels wrong sipping it while just sitting around your house. It needs to be enjoyed in the blistering heat of a summer sun. I’m sure many people will enjoy it in such a manner, but since that ball of gas in the sky and I are sworn enemies, I’m afraid I will never truly enjoy this in its intended manner.

Website
http://www.vitacoco.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Coconut, Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on May 31st, 2017
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Venga Relax Orange, White Grape, Pink Grapefruit, White Tea

Venga Relax Orange, White Grape, Pink Grapefruit, White Tea

I can only hope beyond hope that the folks from the Amsterdam based band Vengaboys moved to Italy, took all of the money they made from their hit single We Like to Party (The Vengabus) and started a functional beverage company. I seriously don’t think I’ve thought about that band in at least 15 years, but as soon as I read the name of this company that damn song was instantly stuck in my head.

I mean this drink would totally fit into their wheelhouse, right? After all that time riding around in the Vengabus, partying all the time, they would need to just kick back and relax sometimes. The problem is EVERYONE knows about the Vengabus, so as soon as they see it they instantly switch into party mode. As a result the members of the band needed to lock themselves in the backroom of the bus and get a little herbal aid. Not pot you savage. The Vengaboys are a wholesome group that only drink copious amounts of alcohol, but it’s legal, so it’s fine…wait they are from Amsterdam…hmm. Okay when they are at home maybe they use other herbal aids, but when on tour they stick to drinks like this.

This has a nice smooth taste. You mostly get pink grapefruit out of it, but the grape and orange and maybe the tea help to mellow out the acidity of it. On the opposite side of the spectrum all of the juices help to negate the bitterness that is normally associated with white tea. It all works together wonderfully.

So not only does this drink help to chill you out (but not make you sleepy) it also does it in a way that tastes great and doesn’t leave you with any sort of medicinal/herbal aftertaste. You hang out in the back of the bus for a hundred miles or so and then you’re ready to party again from New York to San Francisco and wherever else your dancing dreams may take you.

Website
http://www.drinkvenga.com/
Country
Italy
Sweetener
Natural Fruit Sweetener
Categories
Iced Tea, Relaxation
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on January 25th, 2013
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Buy Now
Venga Relax (12 - 16.9 Fl Oz)

Vemma Verve! ParTEA

Vemma Verve! ParTEA

Vemma has been slowly building it’s empire based on a promise of a healthier energy drink that does more than just get you amped up, as well as giving those beverages flavors that are outside the norm in the world of taurine, B vitamins and a whole lot of sugar. Now I seem to have left my Bunsen burners and my Erlenmeyer flasks back at the office so I was unable to perform the proper scientific research to confirm their health claims (they do seem above water though). What I can do with confidence is confirm the taste of this beverage.

This is no Red Bull, Monster or Amped clone. The Verve! line tastes like to other energy drink that I have encountered. For this can of ParTEA let’s start with the fact that it is uncarbonated. This is a good thing since the base of it is green tea and as much as companies work on it, I have yet to taste a carbonated tea that I have preferred over the still variety. They have added mangosteen and aloe to the tea, which give it a nice fruity flavor. Actually the fruity flavor overpowers the tea a bit more than I would prefer it to. By a bit I mean that the tea flavor is hardly there. Such is the sadness in this world. Vemma chose to sweeten the whole deal up with a bit of organic cane sugar as well as a heaping of xylitol, which is a little used zero calorie sweetener. The result is that you end up with a fruity drink with a slight diet flavor to it that has a minimal tea taste, without any trace of the “classic” energy drink flavor to be found.

Did I need to be wearing a lab coat and goggles to type that out to you? Of course not. Did I do it anyways? Of course I did, I’m a scientist!

Website
http://www.vemma.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Xylitol
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink, Iced Tea
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on March 2nd, 2014
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Vedan Green Pumpkin Tea

Vedan Green Pumpkin Tea

I’ve been fooled for the last time. First it was soursop, then white gourd and now it’s green pumpkin. Let me tell you a secret I’m pretty sure they are all exactly the same thing. The sure as hell all taste exactly the same. It tastes like your drinking the milk leftover after eating a bowl of the strongest grain cereal you’ve ever tasted. I bet this is exactly what horse food tastes like. I had such high hopes for a pumpkin drink. You’ve beaten me again Taiwan.

Website
http://www.vedan.com/
Country
Taiwan
Sweetener
Sucrose
Categories
Iced Tea, Juice
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on January 16th, 2012
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VBlast Peach Tea Blast

VBlast Peach Tea Blast

I have a confession to make: this is the first "ingredients in the cap" drink I have had. I know this isn't a big deal to most people, but I feel ashamed admitting this as a 'Thirsty Dude'. It's almost the equivalent of me saying I never had an aloe drink before. Actually, if that was the case Mike and Jay would probably suspend me from the website. Give me a week off to think about what I did, like I was a delinquent kid who stole his parents golf clubs.

The liquid comes out brown when you unscrew the cap, which was kind of unsettling at first. I'll be honest it looked like diarrhea. Sorry to get that image in your head. Once it mixes with the water, it looks just like peach tea so that initial thought gets flushed away. The peach flavor is quite strong and luckily the sucralose doesn't obscure the taste too much. In fact, for a sugar free drink this is quite sweet. If I had to guess I would have thought it was sweetened with sugar.

The only thing that's disappointing is the lack of much of a tea flavor. There is "tea essence" in this, which sounds like someone sprinkled some tea flakes on top. It tastes closer to vitamin water than peach tea. Since there are lots of vitamins in this, and the base is spring water, this isn't that far fetched.

Website
http://www.vblast.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Iced Tea, Mix/Concentrate, Sports/Dietary Supplement, Water
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Derek Neuland on April 24th, 2013
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Buy Now
VBlast Spring Water, Peach Tea, 16.9 Ounce
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