Milk (81 reviews)

Lotte Milkis Strawberry

Lotte Milkis Strawberry

It's rough being eight. I can't have everything I want. Sure, I don't get homework and my math is just adding and subtracting and I only get like four hours a day to play with friends. I have no responsibilities except to brush my teeth, which I only do when mom is watching. I also feed the dog the food I don't want for dinner under the table regardless of what my dad says. So DJ Biacco the chihuahua has gained fifteen pounds and my parents have no idea why. I don't care. I'm eight and don't completely understand consequences.

One thing that I want is pop, all the time. I love it and my dumb mom never lets me have it. I don't care if I lose teeth; they just keep growing back, right? That's why I don't brush them, as I have previously mentioned. So I love pop and want more of it, number one. Number two, more strawberry milk needs to be stocked in the house. I love it and once again, I can't have it all the time and that's just not fair.

You know what would be great? Strawberry milk pop. Man, if they ever made that then I would just lose my mind. Wait, what? They do? You've got to be kidding me. I have to get some. You have some? It’s strange that you would have this on you. If I didn't know better, you would be trying to get me in your van. I don't think you have any. You do have it! I will get in the van because I see that you have video games and pizza in there, but just to eat one slice and try this Milkis.

Ahh! How did no one tell me about...yeah you can close the door. How did no one tell me about this before? It tastes like carbonated strawberry milk. This is the best drink I have ever had.

Where are we going? Oh, we're here? Oh, there's my house. Thanks for taking me home, although it was strange that you did that since I only live two blocks from where we were. Thanks anyhow and thanks for this Milkis.

Website
http://company.lottechilsung.co.kr/eng/
Country
Korea
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Milk, Soda Pop
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on July 15th, 2011
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Market Pantry Holiday Milk Chocolate Mint

Market Pantry Holiday Milk Chocolate Mint

"Holiday milk" sounds like the world's most generic product that has ever existed. It sounds like a gimmick that is used to just reel in idiots to think that it's something truly special. I mean chocolate and mint is not specific to any time of year. If it were eggnog or something with nutmeg in it, yeah, I would say that it is limited to Christmas. Chocolate and mint? Please. Give it to me any time of the year. Please. I love those two rascals together

Enough. Alright. Enough. As a product this is an absolute gem. It's smooth chocolate milk with a little bit of mint in it. It's not too much at all. I was actually surprised that they went as subdued as they did with it. Pleased but surprised. Normally the mix is fairly standard. This though, someone tried this one out and knew what they were up to. They didn't just call up Mix Warehouse over on Pine Avenue and order up the old "Chocolate Mint" mix to add to their product. They called up Harold at Mix Warehouse over on Oak Avenue and bought a chocolate and mint mix separately and mixed them to their liking. I know what you're thinking. A lot of streets are named after trees in this town. It happens. Trees are common. I would move to a city with a group of streets named after trees. Better than living in a city with a group of streets named after presidents or fruits. Those, my friends, are almost always bad news.

Website
http://sites.target.com/site/en/spot/page.jsp?title=market_pantry
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Milk
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on November 17th, 2012
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McDonalds McCafe Chocolate Covered Strawberry Frappé

McDonalds McCafe Chocolate Covered Strawberry Frappé

We are lucky enough to have a McDonald's with a Playplace pretty close to our house. It's nice because when it's terrible outside it's close and my son loves it. He loves the slides and loves the tubes. We went only to discover that it's gone. They have since turned the Playplace into a dining area. Bummer. He and I both agreed that it was a bummer. We went in and decided since we made the drive we should at least get something to eat. I got a McGriddle, which was nothing short of a masterpiece, and my buddy got a parfait, which he might have taken three bites of.

I also got the "limited time only" Chocolate Covered Strawberry Frappe. I enjoy their frappes. This one though, I wish it wasn't a limited time so everyone could enjoy it. I mean it. This thing was great. It had tons of whipped cream with strawberry sauce on it atop of a strawberry chocolate frosty treat. The icing on the cake? Chocolate chips jammed all upside in it; Little bits here and there of fantastic, chocolaty goodness.

I really liked it. It was sweet it really tasted like strawberries and it was just something wonderful. Which brings me to the painful reality that is real life. I opened the door and my buddy was splashing around in a puddle, which I naturally disapproved of. I put the parfait and the frappe, two rhyming foods, on the roof while I got him in the car and in the split second it took me to do it, a gust of wind came from the heavens and knocked my food off the roof. "Son of a gun!" I exclaimed. It was alright. I got him in the car. Then, as luck, which I do not believe in, would have it, another gust of wind came and blew everything off the roof again. My mistake. Happens once; fool on you. Happens twice; fool on me. Then, a 180 happened when I saw none other than The Hamburglar. Everything was instantly fine again and I got to teach my little buddy who the Hamburglar was. An important lesson a father can pass down to his son.

Website
http://www.mcdonalds.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Coffee, Milk
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on March 17th, 2014
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Mi Canton Horchata Sabor De Morro

Mi Canton Horchata Sabor De Morro

I decided to continue my mind trip to our neighbors to the south with this beverage. No, I’m not drinking apple soda and this back to back, I’m just writing the reviews at the same time.

For those of you who are not familiar with horchata (I’m expecting that to be the majority of you reading this), turn off your computer, make your way to the closest authentic Mexican restaurant to you (of course Chipotle doesn’t count!) and order yourself the biggest glass possible. You don’t even need to know what it is. You have the assurance of the Thirsty Dudes that you will love it. Actually if you are lactose intolerant or vegan ignore that order because you will either get really sick or the vegan police will come after you. If that is the case, we assure you that you will not love the way you feel after drinking it.

Horchata is rice, milk and spices (mostly cinnamon) in Mexican culture. Other countries have their own varieties, but the Mexican version is the only one I have ever tried. I admit, it doesn’t sound too appealing, but something happens when those ingredients are mixed together that is magical. It still has a slight rice flavor, but nothing horrible. Actually none of the flavors are too overbearing. They all mix together and live in food racial food harmony.

I’ve only ever had one prepackaged horchata before, and it was a bit on the gross side. If it’s not coming from one of those constantly churning drink machines that used to always be in restaurants, but that you don’t see too often anymore…well then I would tend to avoid it. My friend Ian bought me this when we were on tour together, and I’m glad he did, because it’s one of the best horchatas I’ve had. It tastes like it came right from the machine. Everything is in perfect balance (unlike my last prepackaged one). Now I really want to eat a burrito. Too bad it’s so late and I’m too lazy to make one.

Website
http://www.trianglequalityfoods.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Milk, Other/Weird
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on July 18th, 2012
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MTR Chocolate

MTR Chocolate

I was just thinking of how many times I could write the word "wonderful" before you stopped reading. Then I thought that would be a terrible, albeit factual review. In exchange, I will do a review titled: "Some of the best chocolate drink that has ever passed these lips"

This chocolate drink, for some reason not called chocolate milk, is simply splendid. It is smooth, creamy, and has bits of badam in it. "What is badam?" you ask? Almonds, friend. Almonds. And "bits" is a good way to describe them. They are super tiny and in some sips, non-existent. To further extend the experimentation of what we do here at Thirsty Dudes, a friend of "the dudes" poured a quarter of his half of the drink into the remnants of his coffee making a rather delicious mocha.

I bought this at an Indian market and you should, too. Seriously, you should. Five bottles. You know what that means, right? It means quit your job and go buy some chocolate drink!

Website
http://www.mtrfoods.com
Country
India
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Milk
Rating
5/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on November 6th, 2012
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MTR Chocolate Drink 180ml 6.08oz

Naked Nutrition Whey

Naked Nutrition Whey

This is simply not for me. I am fairly disgusted by milk and all it entails, unless it’s in ice cream form, because I am a child. The protein powders I get are derived from plants or soy. This tastes like someone took powdered heavy cream (if such a thing exists) and then I reconstituted it with water into a thick milky beverage that I could not get more than one sip down. Had I been in a different location in my house I would have probably spit it out. The thing is I can’t really complain because it is exactly what it advertises to be, and I cannot fault them for being something that I despise. They are what they are and I am what I am, and I will avoid consuming it again until the end of my days. Those of you out there who love milk get on this train, because it’s protein that you will be happy about.

Website
http://nkdnutrition.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Milk, Sports/Dietary Supplement
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on July 16th, 2018
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Nestle Milo

Nestle Milo

Many of the frequent Thirsty Dudes and Thirsty Dames have recommended Milo to me. I looked and looked and looked but couldn't find it anywhere. People were willing to ship it to me from the outer reaches of the earth, and for that I thank them. Lucky for me, Jay found it at an Asian market that we actually frequent, frequently. So here we are today, judgment day. Judgment day for Milo.

It was pretty good. It wasn't as thick as I thought it would be. It was not like chocolate milk but more like a thinner soymilk. I couldn't taste any nutrients or minerals. I can't really feel the energy surging...coursing? Yeah, coursing. I can't feel the energy coursing through my body but who cares? It's pretty good and the masses love it.

So, enjoy thirsty guys and gals. It's good. You were right.

Website
http://www.nestleusa.com
Country
Malaysia
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Milk
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on January 6th, 2011
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Milo Chocolate Energy Drink 8 Oz (6 Pack)

Nestle Coffee Crisp

Nestle Coffee Crisp

Living on the border of Canada has its advantages. One of them is the awesomeness that is Canadian candy. Seriously, they put the U.S. to shame. When I was in high school/college I knew a ton of people that would take trips up to the Great White North to stock up on confectionery supplies, as well as a lower drinking age and strip clubs. Nowadays there are a ton of convenient stores and gas stations started carrying one of those three.

Even though (for the millionth time) I'm not a big coffee fan, I do enjoy Coffee Crisp. This evening some friends and I went up to Canada to eat at Licks Home Burgers. They seriously have some of the best veggie burgers and onion rings I've ever tasted. We stopped at a corner store to check out the beverage scene up there, and my eyes got pretty huge when I saw this in the cooler. It tastes pretty much like you would expect; chocolate milk with a hint of coffee. It's smooth, but it somehow leaves the impression of the grittiness of the candy bar. Okay it tastes like a liquefied candy bar. Fans of Canadian candy and chocolate milk take note.

Website
http://www.nestleusa.com
Country
Canada
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Coffee, Milk
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on January 20th, 2011
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Nestle Aguas Frescas Horchata

Nestle Aguas Frescas Horchata

Felix was a cat that lived in Rio de Janeiro. He loved the nightlife and he never wanted to leave. He lived there all his life and was very accustomed to the sights, sounds, and most of all, smells. He was a cat that roamed around during the day to the local eateries and was a common face. Shop owners would leave out saucers of milk because Felix was such a good cat.

One time, it was late at night. Music was playing and people were dancing. Felix was having a good time in the alley just watching. He found himself a bit thirsty so he walked around the corner to see if he could find something to eat. Just then, he heard someone yell, "Hey! Cat!" Felix turned around and it was an old man who worked at a spice shop. The man said "Hey cat. Come here." he then laid out a nice saucer of milk and put some cinnamon in it. He told the cat that he was sure to love it. Felix looked down at the milk and it was quite inviting. He took one lap and was in love. It was sweet, cinnamony, and still was a nice, milky drink. This will most certainly be a stop he makes more often.

Website
http://www.nestleusa.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Milk, Other/Weird
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on April 28th, 2012
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Nestle Aguas Frescas Horchata-Pet, 14-Ounce (Pack of 6)

Nestle Nesquik Double Chocolate

Nestle Nesquik Double Chocolate

I've got a soft spot for Nesquik. It's great. I love the stuff. My grocery store across the street from where I live is pretty good at stocking it. This one I had never seen before so I needed to buy it. I probably went across the street for something like peas or the like, got distracted, and bought chocolate milk.

This is good. I might prefer the regular variety of chocolate milk but this is good. It's not too much and the mad scientists somehow managed to cram even more delicious chocolate into an already pretty chocolaty drink. Great job scientists. None of this is bad but I think it might be one of the "new take on an old classic" things that I just prefer the old to the new. I'm typically not stubborn about thing, and I'm hardly holding a grudge, but this is just a titch less great than the original.

Website
http://www.nestleusa.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Milk
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on March 29th, 2013
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Nestle Nesquik Flavored Milk, Double Chocolate (1%), 16-Ounce Bottles (Pack of 12)
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