Other/Weird (90 reviews)
Drink Chia Honeysuckle Pear
Unlike most pear flavored drinks the taste of the fruit is not very strong in this drink. Actually the flavor is pretty mellow. I think it tastes more of honeysuckle than pear. By that I mean it tastes ever so slightly floral and sweet. The more I think about it the more mild and nondescript the flavor becomes. It’s pleasant enough.
The seeds in this are smaller than those in the Mama Chia line. They still have that slimy coating that makes them go down smooth. They may be tinier, but they are very plentiful. This is a health conscious drink that has a bunch of benefits.
- Website
- http://www.drinkchianow.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Organic Evaporated Cane Juice
- Categories
- Chunky Drinks, Other/Weird
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 9/29/2012
- Comments
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Victoria's Kitchen Almond Water
The quantity of almonds I have consumed in my life is fairly astronomical. I went through a period where I ate 3-5 pounds a week. I feel like I shouldn’t be alive after that. It just seems like so many almonds. I t probably helps my state of living that I only ate raw unsalted ones. Now that I think of it, I probably could have doubled my intake and still been fine. I also have unsweetened almond milk on my cereal every morning. My point is, I know almonds. A lot of things that claim to be almond flavored don’t really taste like the nuts at all. I can assure you readers that Victoria’s Kitchen also knows almonds. As soon as you open this bottle it smells like almond concentrate. That was a bit frightening because I was afraid this might actually be as strong as almond extract, which would be absolute hell on ones taste buds. Before I took a sip I had decided that this was either going to taste like an extreme almond extract, or it was going to taste like watered down almond milk. Neither of those options particularly interested me, so luckily I was wrong. It tastes like you took a glass 99% full of water and mixed in that last 1% with almond extract, well we should probably lower those percents in the same ratio so this hypothetical mixture doesn’t spill out of the nonexistent glass. I like it. It tastes exactly like almonds, but the sugar in it is a bit of a turn off. It’s pretty sweet and it gives it a bit of a candied taste. As a result I couldn’t drink more than half the bottle in one sitting, but I was happy to go back to it later. I think Vicky and her kitchen staff could have gone with perhaps 1/3 of the sugar they used and I would have liked it a lot more, but hey I like my almonds really plain. Now go get a rag, we have to wipe up all this ghost almond drink you spilled all over your counter.
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Pure Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Other/Weird, Water
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 8/8/2012
- Comments
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Mi Canton Horchata Sabor De Morro
I decided to continue my mind trip to our neighbors to the south with this beverage. No, I’m not drinking apple soda and this back to back, I’m just writing the reviews at the same time.
For those of you who are not familiar with horchata (I’m expecting that to be the majority of you reading this), turn off your computer, make your way to the closest authentic Mexican restaurant to you (of course Chipotle doesn’t count!) and order yourself the biggest glass possible. You don’t even need to know what it is. You have the assurance of the Thirsty Dudes that you will love it. Actually if you are lactose intolerant or vegan ignore that order because you will either get really sick or the vegan police will come after you. If that is the case, we assure you that you will not love the way you feel after drinking it.
Horchata is rice, milk and spices (mostly cinnamon) in Mexican culture. Other countries have their own varieties, but the Mexican version is the only one I have ever tried. I admit, it doesn’t sound too appealing, but something happens when those ingredients are mixed together that is magical. It still has a slight rice flavor, but nothing horrible. Actually none of the flavors are too overbearing. They all mix together and live in food racial food harmony.
I’ve only ever had one prepackaged horchata before, and it was a bit on the gross side. If it’s not coming from one of those constantly churning drink machines that used to always be in restaurants, but that you don’t see too often anymore…well then I would tend to avoid it. My friend Ian bought me this when we were on tour together, and I’m glad he did, because it’s one of the best horchatas I’ve had. It tastes like it came right from the machine. Everything is in perfect balance (unlike my last prepackaged one). Now I really want to eat a burrito. Too bad it’s so late and I’m too lazy to make one.
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Categories
- Milk, Other/Weird
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 7/18/2012
- Comments
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Mamma Chia Organic Pomegranate Mint
I currently have a sore throat and I was hoping that by drinking this it would help. I remembered last time I had a chia seed drink, it felt like it was massaging my throat as the slimy little things slid down. While it does indeed still do this, it didn't give the desired relief from pain that I was expecting.
Drinking this is weird because since there are so many seeds, you feel like you have to chew on them before swallowing. I have been trying for 5 minutes now and they just slide out from under my teeth anytime I try to chew. Now I’m thinking about all these seeds I’m ingesting and irrational worrying about that urban legend about swallowing seeds and plants growing inside you.
"We did an x-ray and we found a full size Chia Pet in your stomach". That would probably get me on the cover of Weekly World News, or at least #4 on a blog article titled "10 of the weirdest things found inside a person's stomach".
I was expecting this to have more of a mint taste. Maybe they forgot to mix it in, because all I taste is pomegranate. I love pomegranate, but I was excited to see what pomegranate mint would taste like. Maybe I should drop a 'wint-o-green' Lifesaver inside to see. Rats, I don't have any.
- Website
- http://www.mammachia.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Agave
- Categories
- Chunky Drinks, Juice, Other/Weird
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Derek Neuland on 7/18/2012
- Comments
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Boozer Hangover Remedy
You know how in old movies whenever someone would get trapped up in a snowstorm somewhere in the arctic or some such thing a giant Saint Bernard would come out of nowhere with a barrel full of brandy strapped to its neck? Apparently the brandy would slow down the effects of frostbite. Is there a more adorable way to be saved from a frozen death? Okay koalas dragging you to safety would be pretty cute.
Well the Saint Bernard’s day in the sun is over. There’s a new pup on the block and he’s a coonhound named Boozer. He will never save you from an avalanche, but he just may save you from a killer hangover. While many people may be bummed out that he doesn’t carry around a barrel of alcohol, he does carry around a can of hangover remedy that you will thank him for in the morning. It’s a mixture of vitamins and herbs that help to rejuvenate your body and fight the dehydration that alcohol can cause. It has a mild citrus flavor that combats the taste of the vitamins. The fight is kind of in a stalemate. You can taste the citrus, but it isn’t strong enough to fully cover up the tastes of the vitamins. It’s not horrible, but it’s not something you would drink recreationally, which you shouldn’t anyways as it’s a beverage with a specific purpose. As an added bonus once you take the can from our friend the dog, he’s free to tear it up for the night. He can get tanked and rip it up on the dance floor.
It has taken us over a year to review this from when Boozer sent it to us. Sorry guys, we messed up.
- Website
- http://www.boozerdog.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucralose
- Categories
- Other/Weird, Sparkling
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 5/26/2012
- Comments
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Yung-Ho Rice Drink Peanut
Peter loved peanut butter, or as his mom liked to call it “Peter Butter.” It started with PB&J sandwiches. Then he switched to straight peanut butted on bread, and lots of it. Before he knew it he was hooked on the stuff. He was dipping veggies on it. Eating it with dessert. He even became a regular at a local Thai restaurant because he could get peanut satay there. He consumed more peanut butter than any other substance and it was evident in his physical presence. His mother told him he had to cut down, or else he would turn out to be one of those people that you hear about on the news that is so obese that they can’t even leave their bed, and weeks pass before anyone even realizes they are dead. Peter did not want that to be his future, so he started cutting down on his peanut butter intake. It was hard because he loved the flavor so much. His mother worked out a recipe for a drink that would taste like peanut butter, but wouldn’t be so terrible health wise. She took rice milk and blended in some peanut butter. Sure it wasn’t exactly health food, but it filled the void that the lack of peanut butter had created in Peter’s life, while keeping things a tad better for him. At first Peter thought it was strange. He felt like he was drinking a can of the sauce that was on his peanut satay. The more he thought about it, the more it grossed him out. He didn’t want to drink sauce. Only degenerates and junkies did things like that. He thereby claimed that he was off the sauce. He didn’t want to be a peanut butter junkie anymore. He took the rest of his drink and gave it to the cat, which surprisingly loved it. It’s now been ten years and Peter has taken to lying to people about having a peanut allergy, just so he doesn’t have people tempting him with his old love.
ps. My cat totally starting drinking this and I had to physically restrain her to get her to stop. Cats love peanuts.
- Country
- Taiwan
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Categories
- Other/Weird
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 5/10/2012
- Comments
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My Body Shots Nyte Lemon Lime
Sometimes you have a restless night where you repeatedly fall in and out of sleep. Sometimes at 5am you think to yourself “enough is enough.” You then get up and down a “relaxation drink.” After you lay back down you shortly reenter the world of slumber. You dream that you’re in an airport and your flight was canceled and no one will give you a direct answer as to when you will be boarding a plane, as if it was your fault your flight was cancelled. Eventually you wake up feeling refreshed, thinking to yourself “well that drink really worked.” It’s not until you grab the “shot” bottle that you realize that it wasn’t a relaxation drink at all, but rather an alcohol recovery & rehydration shot. Sometimes you feel like a complete moron and question everything that you once thought was real. Do relaxation drinks really work? Is Bill Murray really that funny? Are hot dog stuffed crusts on pizza really the single greatest idea of our generation? Don’t worry the answer to all of those questions is most definitely yes. You were just tired and half asleep. Sure it was psychosomatic that it worked and you fell back asleep, but it probably would have happened anyways if you had just waited a little longer. The end times are not here, you can rest well.
So yes, this is in fact not a relaxation drink, but I will say that I woke up feeling refreshed, so it works to some extent in its proper function. If you got completely, sloppy wasted I’m not sure it would be much help, but for a couple of drinks I’m sure it would help you not feel like dog doo doo in the morning. Unfortunately, the flavor is not the greatest. It tastes like someone boiled down some lemon lime Gatorade down to a concentrate and pouring it into this little bottle. It’s far too strong and it tastes wrong, but it’s a shot and that is how most of them taste. Oh well.
- Website
- http://mybodyshots.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Other/Weird, Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 4/17/2012
- Comments
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Hey Song Honey White Gourd
When you were a child, you were adventurous. You were not smart but you were curious and wide-eyed. You thought that mixing stuff was a good idea. You would experiment down all the time with orange juice and milk or lemonade and iced tea or iced tea and milk or Pepsi and Coke or milk and mouthwash. Some of them would be good but most of them would be bad but you didn't stop. You would never stop. You are a kid. You just keep going. Youth is on your side and you will forever mix. You are an amateur mixologist. You are a professional mixologist in the making.
When you were a youth, you thought that it would be a good idea to make a drink out of cereal milk. You would drink it and on very rare occasions you would put it in the fridge and save it for later thinking that it will be just as good as if you drank it immediately preceding finishing a heaping bowl of cereal. One time you had a giant bowl of Honey Comb mixed with Honey Smacks and thought that it might be good to drink. You ate the cereal after letting it marinate in the milk and then thoughtfully and carefully strained some of the extra "bits" out and kept the leftover milk in a glass and threw it in the fridge. For dinner, you sat down with your family to eat a pork chop and drink your concoction. You took one sip and you knew you had something. It was intense in its honey quantity and still had some of that cereal-ness to it. You would make this every day for a week before you eventually moved on to something else Cocoa Puff based.
- Country
- Taiwan
- Sweetener
- Sucrose
- Categories
- Other/Weird
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 4/5/2012
- Comments
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Hyper Malt Original
For a few years I thought of how great it would be if someone would market cereal milk. All different kinds, but particularly Fruity Pebbles and Golden Grams. There is nothing better than that flavor infused cream after you've finished the "solids" portion of your two course breakfast cereal. It's like drinking the bathwater of the gods and sometimes, before moving onto that final stage, I refresh the first, making the inevitable payload that much more savory. It's a harrowing exercise of will power to be certain but like any work-out or period of time without smoking cigarettes, it's more than worth it once you cross that finish line. It is, essentially, the bathwater of TWO gods now. Perhaps they bathed together. Maybe there was just a water shortage and they needed to conserve so as long as the temperature remained comfortable they just wouldn't drain it in-between baths. There is no limit to their hygienic routines as long as your imagination is healthy.
What I'm saying is, though this might sound like a good idea to some (or no one after that unfortunate analogy), I have found upon drinking HYPER MALT ENERGY DRINK that cereal milk is only delicious because the person drinking it worked so hard to make it. This energy drink tastes like someone took a bowl of apple juice, emptied the contents of a box of Wheaties into it, let it sit in the sun for a few days, took it back inside, gagged heartily, then ran the fluid through a colander into a bottle which went directly into my mouth. I don't see cereal milk being a big hit for anyone looking to be refreshed, and I don't see HYPER MALT ENERGY DRINK being a big hit for anyone looking to be energized. Unless of course you only need the energy required to hurriedly rush to the bathroom to spit it out before going back to watching Maury Povich like I did this morning. But at least it saved me the tens of thousands of dollars I was going to invest in my new milk company.
When I asked Keith to rate the drink he said "0 of 5. No wait, NEGATIVE 0 of 5." Our scale only goes to "1" but keep in mind that if it was possible, it would be below that.
- Country
- Denmark
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Categories
- Energy Drink, Other/Weird
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Keith Buckley - Singer for Every Time I Die on 2/8/2012
- Comments
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Grandpa Lundquist Traditional Scandinavian Winter Beverage Glogg
While Euroboy may be as graceful as can be when it comes to playing guitar, the same cannot be said about the rest of his life. The sad truth is that he is the klutz of Turbonegro. Whenever the band gets together to practice or a show at some point or another Euroboy will break something. It’s really his hat that is to blame. With that thing on he really can’t see a thing, but he just refuses to take it off. In 2003 when the band had a party to release their album “Scandinavian Leather” Hank from Hell ordered a case of Glogg to celebrate in true Scandinavian fashion. He was so proud of his score, but then Euroboy came bumbling in and crashed into the table. The case went flying and all but one bottle were smashed. It was a sad state of affairs and it’s what ultimately led to Hank leaving the band years later.
Oh you’ve never heard of Glogg? Well it’s a traditional Scandinavian winter beverage that is in essence grape and apple juice mixed with chai. You are supposed to drink it hot. I recommend that you do so because when it’s cold it tastes like someone dumped some liquid potpourri into juice. It’s pretty gross. It smells wonderful. It smells the way Christmas should, and not like burned churches as you might expect something from that region to. When you heat it up it is much better. It is very intense. It’s definitely a sipping beverage and not something that you would chug. It’s sweet and full of spices such as cinnamon, cloves and cardamom. I would have never thought of mixing chai with fruit juice but it makes an interesting match that will help keep you warm during those long Eastern European winters. Now go listen to any of the three albums that Turbonegro released as the Apocalypse Trilogy and pump your fist. There is no better album than “Apocalypse Dudes” for keeping you awake on those long overnight drives.
- Country
- Sweden
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Categories
- Other/Weird
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 2/6/2012
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment
