Sparkling (220 reviews)
Vio Vibrancy Drink Very Berry
Hey dude, I've got this great berry milk. Berry milk? What do you think it is? Yeah, it's like strawberry milk but berry. Did you really need to ask? Sometimes, Daren, I don't know. Give this a try. It's good right? I don't know why they didn't think of this earlier. What have you got there? Daren? Give it here. Seltzer water? That's it? What are you, an old lady? Who just drinks seltzer water? Are you in clown training school or something? Daren. Come on, you know that clowning is a saturated market and the placement has been going down. It's a dying trade. I know you're great at making balloon animals while riding on a tiny bike. What??!!!? Why did you do that? Awwww, Daren. You got seltzer in my berry milk and it's...fantastic. Can you give me another spritz please?
Daren, I take it all back. This is incredible. I've heard that there is a company called Vio that makes a drink that tastes exactly like this. Daren, you know what, buddy? I've got a friend whose dumb kid is having a bar mitzvah and they were looking for a clown. I am going to call Andrew Abromowitz and put in a good word. Practice up on your trade, your craft, and work on your face paint. You look like a sad clown and no one is going to hire a sad clown.
- Website
- http://www.viovibe.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 7/26/2011
- Comments
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Juicy Juice Sparkling Orange
What've you got there? Is that a gun? Oh, it's just a can. Sorry. I'm a bit paranoid. You see, I had this wildly vivid dream where a man who looked just like you stood me up at this very shoe store. I was here, buying my Cole Haan Air Colton Saddle shoes and you came up to me, asked me if you could have my wallet, and then jabbed a gun in my back. It was frightening. What is that drink anyways? Juicy Juice? That's for kids, right? No? Adults can drink it, too? I guess you're right. It's just strange because the last time that I had it, I was like eight years old. I'm used to it in those giant cans, though. I've never seen it in those small, baby cans. One more reason I thought it was for kids.
Oh, that's not necessary. Well, if you've got extra. Did anyone tell you that it's strange that you would just carry around drinks with you? I guess it's even stranger that I, a grown man, would take drinks from a strange man that carries around drinks.
This...isn't that good. I'm sorry. Look, I appreciate it, but it's not that great. Yes, it is orange, but the "sparkling" leaves a bit to be desired. It's not that it's over or under sparkly, it's just...off. I think that I expected a sparkling orange juice, but it's more of a sparkling orange drink. You know, like those orange drinks you get at bodegas as bad parent's houses.
What do you mean, "Can I have your wallet?" Of course you can’t. Wait a minute...I know what you're doing...that is a knife. Oh man, it's happening for real now! Where is that clerk!?
- Website
- http://www.juicyjuice.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- No Sugar Added
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 7/26/2011
- Comments
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Me Unavailable Dragonfruit Blackberry
How is it that erythritol can be the last ingredient in a list of eleven, and it still is so present in the flavor of a drink? Why even bother adding it at that point? It seems like it's worthless as a sweetener, especially when fructose is the second ingredient. Perhaps they just added it for the flavor.
Other than the natural diet flavor this is pretty fruity. The dragonfruit is more prominent that the blackberry. It's would actually be a really decent tasting diet drink, but it's not really a diet drink so it's a regular drink that tastes diet. No one wants that.
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Fructose
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 7/28/2011
- Comments
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Krazy Kritters Foxy Fruit Punch
Do you honestly think that you can make money off that, Sherman; a fox that knows karate? It's a novelty, sure, but does he really know karate or does he just look adorable in a gi? You don't know what a gi is and you want to...a gi is a karate uniform. Yes, with the belt. What color belt are you going to give him and don't say black because you and I both know that a fox could not achieve the highest standard in karate. He's nowhere near as disciplined and I have never even met him. You say that you've got a sponsor already? That's quick, who is it? Krazy Kritters? What do they do? They make juice? Oh, sparkling juice! Cool. I'd like to try that someday when you make it big.
You've got some on you now? Oh, there's that little fox on there now. Cool. Good job. I guess he didn't even need to actually take a class. Can I have this to drink? Thanks. Oh, this is...odd. Did you drink this before you signed the contract? It's strange. It tastes like...remember when they made that gum with pop in it? That's what it tastes like. If you put fruit punch pop in gum and then liquefied it this is what you would have. Plus, the Stevia kind of gives it this unwanted, bitter aftertaste that I do not find desirable.
Look we all know that pictures of starving children sells records, but do foxes in karate attire sell drinks? I don't think so if it tastes like this.
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Stevia
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 7/29/2011
- Comments
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Snow Icy Green Tea-Light
This drink left me wanting more. It tastes like mint seltzer water. I didn't get any tea flavor and didn't get a lot of sweetness. If you are anything like my girlfriend, you drink soda water at restaurants, or even San Pelligrino, which I find undrinkable. I think people drink it because it seems like the "rich person" thing to do when I'm pretty sure that even "rich people" drink it because they see other "rich people" drinking it and secretly not liking it.
Rich people do some strange things. Honestly. One word. Madras. Cut that crap out.
Rich people might like this or they might like pretending to. Us people down in the streets, we want something that doesn't taste like your fountain pop machine ran out of syrup and the idiot behind the counter didn't notice. That on mint.
- Website
- http://www.snowbeverages.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Sparkling
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 8/1/2011
- Comments
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Kristall Swedish Raspberry
It's no secret that hip-hop artists drink Cristal when they are partying to show off their riches. I may have just completely dated myself there. Is that still a thing, or did it die off in the late 90's? Either way, it's a little known fact that those who are fans of flavor country, but don't drink alcohol down bottles of Kristall in the same situations.
This is my second flavor of this fine product and both have completely blown my socks off. Literally. I had to go across the room, pick them up and put them back on my feet. They are so light and bubbly, but still jam packed with fruit flavor. In my dream world all fruit flavored pop would be like this. It's not syrupy and it actually tastes like raspberries, not sugar or some other sweetener. It also comes in a very classy and classic looking bottle.
Kristall for when you want to party fancy style. Anything else would be uncivilized....or something.
- Website
- http://www.kristallbeverage.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 8/7/2011
- Comments
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Gus (Grown Up Soda) Dry Cranberry Lime
Seeing that I am now 32, I own my own business and I have an apartment with my ladyfriend I think it's safe to say I am an adult, or a grown up if you will. Now that I fit into that demographic I can finally drink this brand of soda without feeling like I am cheating. If anyone really felt that way, they are either obviously an actual child between the ages of 2 and 7, or they have some serious issues that they should probably see a specialist about. Feeling guilt over a soda is just plain dumb, unless you stole it from someone else, or you're cheating on your diet.
This pop is "for grown ups" because it's not as sweet as most sodas and it's also dry. I'm not exactly sure what it is that makes a soda dry, but I know I'm drinking one as soon as it hits my lips. Maybe it is just that there is less sugar in it. I tried to "Wiki" it, but all that come up was stuff about the company Dry Soda. All that aside this is a great tasting pop. Both the cranberry and the lime are fighting to be on the forefront of flavor town. That definitely gives it more of a sparkling juice flavor than a soda flavor. It is fairly dry, which is a nice change of pace from all the overly sugary sweet sodas that are out there. I love them but sometimes I need a break, so get off my back!
- Website
- http://www.drinkgus.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 8/10/2011
- Comments
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Steaz Sparkling Green Tea Grape
Surprise, John! It's a celebration! You made it through initiation. I know this last month has been tough and we've been tough on you but you made it. Remember when Tim, the mailman, put an entire box of thumbtacks on your chair and then you sat on it? That was classic. Oh, do you remember when Carol, from accounting, put that eel in your sandwich and watched you eat it? I can't believe it. Then when she told you it was an electric eel and you started screaming; priceless. Ha ha, I just remembered when Bob, the night watchman, pulled his gun out on you when you were walking to your car. That dude, man, parts of me thought that you were going to cry, seriously, I thought you were going to cry.
So, in celebration of you making it through the hazing, we bought you this four-pack of Steaz grape sparkling green tea. It's pretty good. It tastes like light non-alcoholic champagne and since old man Dalrymple won't let us drink at work, this is the best we can do. It's good, though. It tastes like real concord grapes and although I don't get a lot of green tea taste, it's just the right amount of everything else to be awesome.
So you don't have to worry about us always eating your yogurt, putting Vasoline on your door handles, breaking your pencils, telling your wife you are at a "pay by the hour" motel when she calls, or any of that stuff. Welcome to First National Bank!
- Website
- http://www.steaz.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Organic Evaporated Cane Juice
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 8/12/2011
- Comments
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Wegmans 50% Sparkling Fruit Juice Pomegranate Cranberry
Is there a juice shortage in the world? If not, does Wegmans think that there is? The last one of these I had was "100% Sparkling Fruit Juice." Now we're down to 50%. Is this going to be a continual decrease? In a few months will there be 12% juice? It will be like a selling point. "Now containing .5% actual fruit juice." People will think it's a good thing and eat it up.
Seriously though, why is this only 50%? Do they think these particular juices would be too strong if sold at maximum capacity? Are they trying to cut down on the sugar? Either way it's still pretty good. The flavor is strong. It tastes like a slightly watered down blend of the two juices it represents. If it were a little bit stronger I would absolutely love it. Maybe 75% is the way to go. I'm talking to you Danny!
- Website
- http://wegmans.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- No Sugar Added
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 8/18/2011
- Comments
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Izze Fortified Sparkling Clementine
Real fruit juice? Check.
No sugar added? Check.
Fortified with vitamins? Check.
There's really not much to say about this drink other than it's great. It doesn't promise much, but it delivers everything it says it does. If Izze is one thing it is that they are truth tellers. Liars need not apply at their company. I appreciate that and I appreciate this drink. It tastes like clementines mixed in with a handful of white grapes. It's also crazy how sweet this is without any added sugar. Further proof that most companies are dumb, or don't use real fruit juice.
- Website
- http://www.izze.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- No Sugar Added
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 8/26/2011
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment
