Water (207 reviews)
Jones 24c Cranberry Apple
Why on Earth do all of these drinks taste like they have some sort of artificial sugar in them when they are actually sweetened with inverted cane sugar? I think they might actual be decent vitamin based water drinks, but nope something just tastes wrong in all three flavors I’ve reviewed. As I’ve said in the past it may just be that they don’t do a very good job of disguising the taste of the ridiculous vitamins and minerals and dirt and stones that are in the drink. I can tell you that I taste approximately zero apple and very minimal cranberry in here. It has a general quasi fruit flavor that seems like it will be good for you because of the off flavor. I wouldn’t purchase this again. I also wouldn’t advise that you do either with so many other companies doing a similar thing that taste much better.
- Website
- http://www.jonessoda.com
- Country
- Canada
- Sweetener
- Inverted Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement, Water
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 4/10/2012
- Comments
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Sobe Lifewater Mango Melon
Sometimes we get to a point where we have just reviewed far too many flavors of the same product line. What’s left to say? That you’re stuck in a desert and your hallucinating from the heat and lack of fluids, so you follow a lizard, and the lizard talks to you and tells you the secrets of the universe, and informs you specifically what the secret behind pi is. Finally he reaches into his stomach and pulls out a bottle of mango melon flavored Lifewater. The bottle is dripping with viscera and such, but as I said you’ve been wandering this godforsaken desert for what feels like 40 days and nights and you’re wondering how the Jews did it in the bible, so you open the bottle and even though lizard guts are touching your lips you chug that bottle of refreshment. It tastes like someone dissolved a mango and melon flavored powder in a bottle of water and didn’t quite shake it up well enough. It also tastes very diet, but in the erythritol way and not the sucralose way, you know the way that is tolerable. As soon as you swallow that last drop that tastes somehow grainy even though it doesn’t in texture, you turn to look at the lizard, but you realize that you’re not in the desert at all. You are actually in the middle of math class and you’ve drooled all over your protractor. There is an empty bottle on the floor next to your desk and you have a vague recollection of buying it from the pop machine in the cafeteria. For some reason there is still lizard guts on your lips. Is that what’s left to say? If so, strange times indeed.
- Website
- http://www.sobe.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Erythritol
- Categories
- Diet, Sports/Dietary Supplement, Water
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 4/11/2012
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment
365 Nutrient Enhanced Water Pink Lemon Aid
The world of vitamin waters is pretty murky. While there are some really good ones, there are also a lot of bad knock offs. Whole Foods usually knows what's what when it comes to drinks so I figured this one would be a safe bet. What surprised me though was how tart is. Most "lemonade flavored" drinks aren't tart at all. They throw a little lemon flavor in there but don't make your lips pucker at all. This is the closest lemonade flavor vitamin water I’ve ever had, and I love it. It's a delicious light, flavorful, and thirst quenching lemonade.
- Website
- http://www.wholefoodsmarket.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Organic Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement, Water
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Derek Neuland on 4/12/2012
- Comments
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Wat-Ahh! pH+
Wat-aah! Sent us samples of each of their “flavors.” I use the word flavor as loosely as possible because I have tried two of them thus far, and they both taste like water. I have no problem with that. I drink more than my allotted share of water in a day, but it’s hard to find something to say about a beverage that basically tastes like every other bottled water out there. According to the bottle is has a 9.0pH, which according to the chart I just looked up is the pH level of baking soda and sea water. Luckily it tastes like neither of those things. It’s clean, cool and refreshing. I definitely enjoyed it, but there is nothing special about it, but that also means that there was nothing wrong with it and it is a stellar example of water, so I gave it a five-bottle review.
- Website
- http://drinkwataah.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- No Sugar Added
- Categories
- Water
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 4/12/2012
- Comments
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Fresh Healthy Stuff Multi-V Lemon Lime
Sprite and 7-Up. That's what we think when we hear "lemon lime". To drink something lemon lime that isn't carbonated is just kind of strange. It's not the non-pop company’s fault; they were just there first and more prominently. Now the new jacks have to make up for lost time. Fresh Healthy Stuff helps themselves to the cake by making a cool, interactive cap that snaps on any bottled water. Surprisingly, it doesn't spill when you shake it. I am notorious for using too much water, having to take the cap off to compensate, and then spilling some water, but that's because I'm a dumb dummy.
One thing I will say is that it is so hard to get the cap to push the mix in the drink. First one I didn't have a terrible time. My girlfriend couldn't do it. The one that I had last night though, brother. No way. I was pushing so hard and couldn't get it. I eventually had to put the cap on and slam the cap against the bottom of my cabinet to get it to go. It did, it mixed and I drank it.
Flavor hour? It's good. It's a bit...vitaminy, but it's not terrible. The orange was better. It was an expectant flavor but was a bit...tingy. Is that a word? It's underlined red which means that it isn't but you know what? It, like Yiddish, translates.
- Website
- http://freshhealthystuff.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Stevia Leaf Extract
- Categories
- Drink Mix/Concentrate, Sports/Dietary Supplement, Water
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 4/18/2012
- Comments
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Karma Wellness Water Vitality Pineapple Coconut
Tyler loved basketball. Basketball was his favorite sport. He liked the way the players dribbled up and down the court. He saw them just sweating on the court, everyone wearing shorts, light jerseys, and still needing sweatbands. Sweat everywhere. They were drinking so it's not like they were dehydrated or dehydrating. Maybe they needed something better, something with flavor, something with vitamins, something with minerals, something fun, something low in calories. He searched high and low in markets and stores and found the perfect drink. Karma Wellness Water, namely the pineapple coconut flavor.
He bought a case of the stuff and went to Madison Square Gardens where the Knicks were playing the Chicago Bulls. He saw that Spike Lee was outside and was going in. He talked to him for a couple minutes and convinced him to let him sit next to him right next to the bench so he could give players the drinks. Throughout the game, players would be benched and Tyler would hand the players drinks. He loved to watch the players poke the flavor into the drink and smile. Every time without fail they would do that. Sometimes they would look back and give Tyler a thumbs up. That made his day. When the game was over he shook Spike Lee's hand and thanked him. He was walking out and someone called his name. He turned around and it was Michael Jordan and Scottie Pippin! He didn't know what to think. He didn't know what to do. They told him that they liked the drinks. They liked that it was tropical and they could taste both he coconut and pineapple. It wasn't too sweet and was very refreshing. Then Michael Jordan reached in his pocket and handed him a season pass to Knicks games. He thought it was strange but it's more important that he liked basketball than the Bulls. He lived in New York. What was he going to do with a season pass to Chicago living in New York. He thanked Scottie and Michael and walked away after having the best night of his life. All thanks to Karma.
- Website
- http://www.drinkkarma.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Categories
- Water
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 4/18/2012
- Comments
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Cascade Ice Blueberry Watermelon
Folks, let’s just face the facts. The chances of anyone out there actually making a watermelon flavored drink that tastes like watermelons are slim to none. Most things that are supposed to be watermelon end up tasting like Jolly Ranchers. They only get the credit because there zero amount of research I will claim them as the first company to try and harness the essence of watermelon. It’s not a bad flavor, but it certainly tastes absolutely nothing like the fruit. There is so much water in watermelon that it would probably take 50 full grown melons to get enough essence juice to make an 8oz beverage. It’s just not cost effective, especially since I don’t think there are any real health benefits to that specific fruit. Rant over.
While this doesn’t actually taste like watermelon, it does have a decent blueberry flavor to it. It’s also the strongest tasting Cascade Ice that I have tried. Sure it’s sweetened with sucralose and is essentially flavored seltzer water (a losing combination in my book) it is still remotely enjoyable for me. I keep thinking “I’m really not into this,” but as soon as the flavor leaves my mouth I find myself taking another sip. I can only assume that those of you out there who are into diet drinks, and who are not grossed out by the taste of sucralose, would really enjoy this. With zero calories you could drink an entire case of this and not feel terrible about yourself, well except for the fact that you peed your pants.
- Website
- http://www.cascadeicewater.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucralose
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 4/22/2012
- Comments
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Owater Infused Peach Mango
Somewhere in a dark dungeon of a laboratory a scientist, possibly a mad one, is wringing his hands together in celebration of his victory. In the light of one of those things that is just two poles that shoot electric waves between them he is one happy little monkey. What are those things called anyway, and why does every evil scientist have them in their lab? Are they a way of turning evil into electricity? These are questions the public has, and which we demand answers! Back to our scientist: He is so pleased with himself because he has created an unholy abomination of water and antioxidants, and to top that he has added flavor to it. Somewhere deep in the pages of the bible god proclaimed that man would not mix water with those who fought against the mighty oxidants, but that did not stop our evil friend. He will certainly go to hell for these acts, but he has created water that will fight free radicals that tastes like a nice peach-mango combination, and that is certainly worth eternal damnation. Even if he does have to “face his maker” his plan is to claim that in reality it is no longer water because it’s so sweetened and flavored, albeit lightly. You see he simply made an antioxidant ridden drink. That would fool god right?
- Website
- http://www.owater.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Raw Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement, Water
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 4/29/2012
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment
Wat-Ahh! Power
I feel sort of stupid reviewing these drinks, because they are essentially just water. Sure each one has a little something added for a benefit, but you can’t taste it at all. Well, maybe you could taste it if you had insanely powerful taste buds, but I assure you I only have an unnaturally strong sense of smell.
What we have in this instance is a bottle of vapor distilled water with magnesium added to it. One would think that this is some kind of energy water since it’s called “Power,” but the name is just because magnesium helps to build strong bones and muscles. The bottle says that it’s a nice change of pace from eating spinach. I say they are wrong. Spinach is delicious and I eat it all the darn time. I also drink a cubic butt load of water a day, so I guess it’s for those of us who don’t get enough of either, but yep…it still tastes like water.
- Website
- http://drinkwataah.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- No Sugar Added
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement, Water
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 5/2/2012
- Comments
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Sobe Lifewater Strawberry Dragonfruit
Jeremy had a very limited space at his farm but since farming was in his blood, he never gave it up. He harvested only strawberries and herded one thing, which oddly enough, were dragons. Yes, sure the strawberries encroached into the dragon pen but the dragons never cared about having to eat them. Jeremy didn't mind either. It was a lot cheaper than feeding the dragons their usual diet of giant rats, mice, and Raisin Bran.
Once a week, Jeremy would milk the dragons to harvest their juice. Yes, dragons lactate juice. Where did you think that dragonfruit flavored drinks get their taste from, an actual fruit? That's crazy. He would get all the juice, put it inside a giant containment unit and then hand squish strawberries into it and make his own juice. This juice was nothing short of awesome, too. It was sweet and still left room to taste like both strawberries and dragonfruit. Jeremy was concerned about health and was also on the forefront of sweeteners so he used natural alternative sweeteners like Stevia.
One day, a giant tour bus drove up to Jeremy's farm. The door opened and loud rock music and smoke emerged. Three men in black suits came out. Two were some of the largest men he'd ever seen. The one in the middle carried a suitcase. He explained that he worked for Sobe and was prepared to offer him "a large sum of money" for his secret. Jeremy, having done this for about fifteen years, thought that it might be time to start something new like becoming a honeydipper or used car salesman. He shook the smaller mans tiny, frail, uncalloused hands, and said goodbye to the two behemoths who gave him a nod but didn't actually say anything which Jeremy thought was rude.
Jeremy was rich. His hard work had paid off and now he could spend time riding the dragons and eating strawberries rather than making juice out of them.
- Website
- http://www.sobe.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Erythritol
- Categories
- Water
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 5/7/2012
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment
