Hansen's - 18 Reviews

Hansen's Self Beauty Elixer Blushing Berry

Hansen's Self Beauty Elixer Blushing Berry
Baby girl you're getting married today and I have just the thing for you. Don't look at me like that! No, it's not an energy drink! It's a beauty elixir. It will make you glow girl! You know how they refer to people as blushing brides? Well in the olden days that would happen naturally, but with all of the artificial crap that is in food now a days your body needs a little help. That's where Hansen's comes in. They have come up with a formula with all of the vitamins and nutrients that a bride to be needs to give her the blush at the alter. On top of that they gave it a nice berry flavor. It's a mixture of blackberries, blueberries raspberries and strawberries. For a little extra something something they even added a little bit of cranberry in there. Unfortunately in order for the formula to work properly they did have to add a little sucralose to it, but it's so slight of an amount that you can't really tell that it's there at all. The acerola in there you can taste a bit and it gives it a weird twist. It's weird, but it's good.

Baby girl you are going to blush so hard at the alter after you drink this, your husband isn't going to know what to think. Seriously though, do you think anyone is really going to believe you just because you're wearing a white dress? Let's get real here.
Rating
🥃🥃🥃🥃🥃
Categories
Diet and Sports/Dietary Supplement
Company
Hansen'sWebsite@HansensNatural
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Author
Jason Draper on 7/17/12, 3:52 PM
Buy It
Amazon.com
Share
Direct Link

Hansen's Sugar Free Acai Black Tea

Hansen's Sugar Free Acai Black Tea
Oh, no. I don't want to do this to Hansen's again. I really like a lot of their products but I have to do this. I owe it to myself so that I may sleep at night and the public since I am the messenger. People come here for professionally written reviews about products the world loves. This, though...phew. What a dump of a drink. It is a liquid. This is true. It tastes like some garbage, diet powder mix drink. Now, I've had some of those that are good, but this would not be one of those. I'm not 100% on Acai's bus. I'm half way out the door with the driver pushing me in so that he can get me, and my fellow riders, to our destination on time. Don't push me, bus driver. I'm not ready to give in, yet. This drink is bitterly sweet like Acai drinks are but, man, uber-sweet and uber-diet.

This is an abomination of a black tea. Black tea should sue Hansen's for the slander that is this drink. As soon as this hits my mouth I am in terror. Diet. Bleh. I've drunk Spenda drinks before but this might take the cake as being some of the worst I've ever had. There are light years of distance between "sugar free" and "unsweetened" and if you don't know that, you should get out of the game and enjoy something else.

Hansens. You know I love you. I love many of your products. If you could remove this and that pineapple drink that I hated from your line, I would give you the highest reward of plugging the daylights out of you, until then, justice.
Rating
🧃🧃🧃🧃🧃
Categories
Iced Tea
Company
Hansen'sWebsite@HansensNatural
Country
United States
Sweetener
Splenda
Author
Mike Literman on 6/14/12, 1:55 PM
Buy It
Amazon.com
Share
Direct Link

Hansen's Natural Cane Soda Creamy Root Beer

Hansen's Natural Cane Soda Creamy Root Beer
Mike and I get nutty over Hansen's sodas. A few years ago he ordered a case and he and editor Dan went on a mini tour with my old band. We drank way more soda than anyone should, but we were stuck in a van for long periods of time, and you get bored, so you drink. The thing is that Mike ordered all of the fruity flavors. They were all great. Even when they were on the verge of boiling from being in the van for days in the middle of August, they still tasted good (albeit extremely weird and corrosive). For as much as I love their other sodas this is the first time that I have tried their root beer, and I am shockingly not impressed. It tastes like the company took a normal everyday root beer like A&W or Dads and just switched out the sweetener for cane sugar. There's nothing really special to the flavor at all. Since it claims to be creamy, I expected there to be a heavy vanilla presence, but it's only slightly more apparent than in “normal” root beers. I can't say that I dislike it at all, but I just expected more from a company who has made other sodas that were so spectacular.
Rating
🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷
Categories
Root Beer and Soda Pop
Company
Hansen'sWebsite@HansensNatural
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Author
Jason Draper on 5/4/12, 5:20 PM
Buy It
Amazon.com
Share
Direct Link

Hansen's Natural Cane Soda Pomegranate

Hansen's Natural Cane Soda Pomegranate
Finally I've found a pop that captures the essence of pomegranates. I have drunk dozens of pomegranate and pomegranate + [other fruit] hybrids and something is lost in most of them. Anyone who has ever eaten a real pomegranate knows what I'm talking about. That sweetness mixed with the bitterness mixed with the deliciousness. Sure, you don't get yellow hands from drinking this like you do prepping a real, live pomegranate, but do you really ever miss that? Preparing the pomegranate makes you look like you've been smoking sixteen cartons of cigarettes per day for your entire life.

This is great and I think that it's one of the Hansen's flavors that is available that I can get in my area. If you like pomegranates and are wearing a white shirt and don't want to get juice all over it, this is not only clear, but tastes like what you want. Win, win, win, win. Also, if I may teach you something that I learned; if you put cut a pomegranate in half and whack the back with a wooden spoon, you can get all the little flavor crystals out pretty easily. Just watch how hard you hit it because there is a lot of "loose juice" that can come at you. You're welcome for saving you like ten minutes per fruit.
Rating
🥛🥛🥛🥛🥛
Categories
Soda Pop
Company
Hansen'sWebsite@HansensNatural
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Author
Mike Literman on 4/17/12, 4:38 PM
Buy It
Amazon.com
Share
Direct Link

Hansen's Sugar Free Passionfruit Green Tea

Hansen's Sugar Free Passionfruit Green Tea
I'm sorry, but I have nothing positive to say about this drink. It doesn't really taste like tea at all, even though it has natural tea solids. It also tastes overly diet. Splenda is the devil, and it has no place in beverages. Drink companies of the world take note. It's gross. I don't want to drink it. Keep it out of your drinks, so I don't have to taste it when I write reviews. I understand the need for diet drinks. We live in a country where the majority of the inhabitants are overweight in an unhealthy way. Diet drinks are fine; just use natural sweeteners such as Stevia. Finally, the peach flavor tastes insanely fake due to all of the artificial sweetener that's in here. Hansen's I expected more from you.
Rating
🍾🍾🍾🍾🍾
Categories
Diet and Iced Tea
Company
Hansen'sWebsite@HansensNatural
Country
United States
Sweetener
Acesulfame Potassium
Author
Jason Draper on 3/29/12, 11:06 PM
Buy It
Amazon.com
Share
Direct Link

Hansen's Natural Pomegranate Green Tea

Hansen's Natural Pomegranate Green Tea
Dear Hansens,
You make some very tasty beverages, but this isn't one of them. I bought this from Big Lots for 70 cents so you obviously already know this and have taken the steps to discontinue this awful iced tea. I'd expect this bland taste from a generic gas station iced tea, but not you. The worst part is that this is sweetened with cane sugar but it tastes like high fructose corn syrup. I can't even taste the pomegranate and the green tea tastes more like black tea. I bought a few flavors from this same discontinued line from Big Lots that I'm suddenly not so excited to try.
Rating
🧃🧃🧃🧃🧃
Categories
Iced Tea
Company
Hansen'sWebsite@HansensNatural
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Author
Derek Neuland on 1/11/12, 12:45 PM
Buy It
Amazon.com
Share
Direct Link

Hansen's Self Beauty Elixer Tropical Bliss

Hansen's Self Beauty Elixer Tropical Bliss
Hey Paul, are you really entering that beauty contest? I mean that's a joke right? You look like a gorilla somehow mated with an eel. Your parents are fairly good looking, how did you end up so weird looking? I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. I just wanted to make sure you didn't completely embarrass yourself out on that stage. Sure you have a great act for the skill section. I don't know anyone else who can balance all of their body weight on their nose while singing Cher songs like you can. What is that, your secret weapon? I don't think it's really going to work, but if you want to give it a try, it's all you.

Wow! You pounded that can and now you look like a young Steve Guttenberg. I don't know if it's enough to win, but it's a definite improvement and you won't get laughed off of stage. Do you have another? Hmm this tastes like a light tropical fruit punch. It's got sucralose in it, but it's one of the better tasting diet drinks I've ever had. What's that? I don't look any different? Well is that really a shocker? I mean did you really think I could look any better? I'm pretty much Oscar Wilde's dream come to life.
Rating
🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷
Categories
Diet and Sports/Dietary Supplement
Company
Hansen'sWebsite@HansensNatural
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Author
Jason Draper on 6/10/11, 5:57 PM
Buy It
Amazon.com
Share
Direct Link

Hansen's Natural Energy Pro Citrus

Hansen's Natural Energy Pro Citrus
Hansen's makes a damn good soda. There are no questions there. In the past, I haven't had the best luck with "natural" energy drinks. They always taste bad, but not in the normal energy drink way. Bad in the "now I know why companies load their drinks with sugar to mask these flavors" way.

I'm happy to say that Hansen's knows how to make an energy drink! This is really delicious. It almost taste like a less syrupy grapefruit soda with a splash of Mountain Dew. There's no battery acid taste, which is great. As far as the energy portion of the drink goes, I've been dancing in my chair to Kanye West while writing this whole interview so I think it's working. Good work Hansen's!
Rating
🍾🍾🍾🍾🍾
Categories
Energy Drink
Company
Hansen'sWebsite@HansensNatural
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucrose
Author
Derek Neuland on 4/18/11, 1:49 PM
Buy It
Amazon.com
Share
Direct Link

Hansen's Lo-Cal Juice Cocktail Tropical Mangosteen

Hansen's Lo-Cal Juice Cocktail Tropical Mangosteen
Mangosteen may not be my favorite fruit ever, but it still has a little something going for it. I blame the name. Even though I know it has absolutely nothing to do with mangoes my brain always expects a little bit of their flavor to creep in. Of course it never does.

This is more of a tropical fruit punch than it is mangosteen. It does have mangosteen juice in it, but it doesn't show up on the ingredients list until after apple, orange, pineapple and passionfruit. All of those flavors blend together into one solid flavor.

Had this been made with cane sugar I imagine I would be in love with it. Hansen's decided to give the world a nice natural lo-cal treat so they used rebiana as a sweetener. As I've stated many time I'm not a huge fan of diet drinks, but as far as they go anything sweetened with the stevia plant is far superior to any artificial lo-cal sweeteners. You can still tell it's diet by the taste, but it's not enough to turn you off from the flavor of the fruit juice held within.
Rating
🥛🥛🥛🥛🥛
Categories
Diet and Juice
Company
Hansen'sWebsite@HansensNatural
Country
United States
Sweetener
Rebiana
Author
Jason Draper on 4/18/11, 8:48 AM
Buy It
Amazon.com
Share
Direct Link

Hansen's Lo-Cal Juice Cocktail Pomegranate Blackberry

Hansen's Lo-Cal Juice Cocktail Pomegranate Blackberry
Hansen's, you know what you are doing when it comes to sodas. I don't care what Derek thinks. Mike and I love you for your fizzy greatness. Your canned smoothies left a lot to be desired. In fact I think your pineapple coconut one was the first drink we ever gave a "one-bottle" review to. I know we use the phrase "barf sauce" a decent amount on here, but that smoothie literally tasted like vomit. So you are up for pop, down for soda.

Here we venture forth into your third line of drinks, juice. This here is the tiebreaker and as it turns out, you come out on the winning team. This is some pretty great juice. It's good on it's own, but the fact that it's a diet juice puts it over the top. Rebiana is a great lo-cal sweetener that doesn't have a very strong diet taste. It tastes like pomegranate and blackberry, just the way it should. I wish it was more than 35% fruit juice, but as I said for a diet beverage, this has a lot going for it.
Rating
🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷
Categories
Diet and Juice
Company
Hansen'sWebsite@HansensNatural
Country
United States
Sweetener
Rebiana
Author
Jason Draper on 3/29/11, 4:33 PM
Buy It
Amazon.com
Share
Direct Link

Hansen's Diet Creamy Root Beer

Hansen's Diet Creamy Root Beer
Have you ever been super stoked on a drink but then you take a sip and you find out someone put sand in it? This has never happened to me, but it's how I feel about this can. I love root beer and I love Hansen's, but I do not love diet soda. For a second this taste good, but then the awful diet acid taste kicks in. Sorry Hansen's, I'm sticking with the regular sugar versions of your soda.
Rating
🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷
Categories
Diet, Root Beer and Soda Pop
Company
Hansen'sWebsite@HansensNatural
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Author
Derek Neuland on 3/2/11, 10:42 PM
Buy It
Amazon.com
Share
Direct Link

Hansen's Natural Cane Soda Vanilla Cola

Hansen's Natural Cane Soda Vanilla Cola
Poor Dan. Dan, for one reason or another can't taste this drink. It's like his mouth just can't process the flavors. It's very strange. I gave him a taste of mine and he said he couldn't do it. I do feel bad for him. What could one do to themselves to justify not being able to enjoy something as nice as a clean tasting vanilla cola? Remember when Coke and Pepsi (nearly) simultaneously came out with vanilla pops? I do. I liked them. Coke Vanilla (once again) trumped Pepsi Vanilla, but guess what friends? Hansen's, the little guy, just beat both two of those guys.

It's a clean taste. Real smooth. As anticipated, the vanilla rounds out the inherit sharpness of the cola. Since it's a cane sugar drink, the flavor come and goes quickly leaving you with just the aftertaste of a nice vanilla. I'm lucky to have found a place around me that sells Hansen's because before this, the closest place was a state or two over. Lame? You know that's right. Jerk chicken? You know that's right.
Rating
🧃🧃🧃🧃🧃
Categories
Soda Pop
Company
Hansen'sWebsite@HansensNatural
Country
United States
Sweetener
Pure Cane Sugar
Author
Mike Literman on 3/2/11, 10:25 AM
Buy It
Amazon.com
Share
Direct Link

Hansen's Natural Cane Soda Mandarin Lime

Hansen's Natural Cane Soda Mandarin Lime
Hansen's you've done it again! You consistently put out some of my favorite sodas. Their products always go down smooth. Well, unless you drink it after it's been sitting in a car on a boiling summer day. Then it gets crazy harsh and it becomes an interesting adventure. It happened to us once and we couldn't stop drinking it, even though it felt like acid was melting our throats.
This is made with extracts of actual mandarin oranges and limes. That instantly gives it an advantage over most sodas.
Rating
🥛🥛🥛🥛🥛
Categories
Soda Pop
Company
Hansen'sWebsite@HansensNatural
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Author
Jason Draper on 12/2/10, 1:00 PM
Buy It
Amazon.com
Share
Direct Link

Hansen's Natural Cane Soda The Grove

Hansen's Natural Cane Soda The Grove
Get on a plane and ride it to the Caribbean because that's where you will want to be after taking one sip of this stuff. I think that this would be best drunk at the coldest it can get before it freezes. A strange thing to say, I know, but mine is cold and I am loving it. It's a smorgasbord of fruit flavors and I can't really put my finger on any other than lemon and lime, but it's not a Sprite or 7Up by any means. It's very sweet, but very good. I could see myself buying this again without a doubt.

This is a limited edition flavor, which means if you see it get it. It taunts you when you put the drink to your mouth because it's very strong in the citrus department. You'll like it.

I don't know why my picture looks like I airbrushed it. Think of it as a 90's hair metal video. Everything had a soft edge on it and I don't know why.
Rating
🥃🥃🥃🥃🥃
Categories
Soda Pop
Company
Hansen'sWebsite@HansensNatural
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Author
Mike Literman on 10/22/10, 1:14 PM
Share
Direct Link

Hansen's Natural Cane Soda Cherry Vanilla Creme

Hansen's Natural Cane Soda Cherry Vanilla Creme
I bought an 8 pack of this on a whim because they were on sale and it looked like a flavor I'd love. I don't usually take chances when I buy more than a 4 pack, but I am so glad I did this time. Unlike the last soda from Hansen's I tried, this one is full of flavor! Each sip tastes different than the last. Sometimes it tastes like cream soda with a strong vanilla taste and a hint of cherry. Other times it tastes like a creamy cherry vanilla soda. This soda is delicious and goes down so smooth.
Rating
🍾🍾🍾🍾🍾
Categories
Soda Pop
Company
Hansen'sWebsite@HansensNatural
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Author
Derek Neuland on 10/12/10, 1:26 PM
Buy It
Amazon.com
Share
Direct Link

Hansen's Natural Cane Soda Pomegranate

Hansen's Natural Cane Soda Pomegranate
I really wanted to love this soda because I love pomegranate flavored drinks. Sadly, this soda doesn't have a strong flavor. It tastes like sparkling water with some sugar and a hint of pomegranate flavoring. But if you like pop that is light on flavor, this is definitely for you.
Rating
🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺
Categories
Soda Pop
Company
Hansen'sWebsite@HansensNatural
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Author
Derek Neuland on 9/26/10, 4:55 PM
Buy It
Amazon.com
Share
Direct Link

Hansen's Smoothie Pineapple Coconut

Hansen's Smoothie Pineapple Coconut
Hey. You know when you throw up and then try to cover up the taste with old popcorn? You do? Then number 1; I'm sorry. Number 2; you don't need to drink this.

For a company that has the best pop I've ever drunk, this stuff belongs in the filth can.

Here's how it went down...
I drank it and liked it while it was in my mouth. As soon as I swallowed it, I got a strange barf taste and I thought it might be the metal from the can so I poured it into a glass. I took another drink and it was worse. Afterwards I felt sick because you always are reminded of throwing up when your mouth tastes like, or recently tasted like, up-chuck.

I made this site with my bare hands and I wish I had created a 0 rating because this would get it.

Hansen's, I am happy that I reviewed this drink before your Cherry Vanilla Creme pop because you can only go up from here.
Rating
🥛🥛🥛🥛🥛
Categories
Coconut and Smoothie
Company
Hansen'sWebsite@HansensNatural
Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Author
Mike Literman on 9/17/10, 8:15 PM
Share
Direct Link

Hansen's Smoothie Mango Pineapple

Hansen's Smoothie Mango Pineapple
Mike and I were first introduced to Hansen's sodas when we found ourselves backstage at Warped Tour visiting friends a few years ago. We thought it was incredible, and since we couldn't find it around Buffalo, Mike ordered a case. It's been over a year, and this is my first run in with it since then. This is supposed to be a smoothie, but it doesn't have the proper consistency so I will claim it as a juice. It tastes like mango, with a slight pineapple aftertaste. It's pretty good. I didn't even realize until I was done that it has high fructose corn syrup in it. I would never have expected that from drinking it.
Rating
🍾🍾🍾🍾🍾
Categories
Smoothie
Company
Hansen'sWebsite@HansensNatural
Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Author
Jason Draper on 9/17/10, 7:05 PM
Buy It
Amazon.com
Share
Direct Link