Rockstar (26 reviews)

Rockstar Super Sours Energy Drink Green Apple

Rockstar Super Sours Energy Drink Green Apple

Paint then caulk. Paint then caulk. Paint then caulk. That's all Francis was doing. He had just moved into a new house and had to caulk and paint the whole house himself. He had some time off and just wanted to knock it out as soon as he could. Paint then caulk. Such a time consuming process. Paint, wash brushes, caulk. Over and over. He knew he could spice it up a bit so he took a break for lunch and saw a new energy drink that he hadn't had before. SuperSours sounds like something he would have drank as a kid. As an adult with a fresh mortgage, he now looked back fondly at his day of youth filled with just playing with friends until the sun set night after night. Now it was just office work day in and day out. Wearing heavily starched shirts with ties, khakis, and dress shoes every day just to sell office supplies. In hindsight, it was not the life that he ever thought that he would lead.

He took a drink and it took him back to those days. He took another sip and just closed his eyes and reminisced about playing in the pool with friends, playing hockey in the street, and football in people's front yards. It was a sour that was somewhere in between a Warhead and a Jolly Rancher. It was a familiar taste that he hadn't had in years. He took another sip and it seemed more and more childish and less like it was a good idea to buy it. What was he doing? It was an energy drink that didn't taste like an energy drink, which was good, but it was a sour, sour apple drink. That was kids stuff. Why would kids drink an energy drink? Kids are filled with energy. Francis was feeling more like an adult with every sip. He said to himself, "Hey, kids can't fix a sink like me. Kids can't crunch numbers to make deals like me. I was a dumb kid. Now look at me. I've got a great haircut, a semi-babe as a girlfriend, and a sweet new house. Who needs this kid stuff? I'm a friggin' adult!" People looked at him like he was crazy. He slowly got up and walked back to his house. He grabbed the tube of caulk and started again and though to himself, "Oh yeah. This sucks. I wish I was a kid again...again."

Website
http://www.rockstar69.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucrose
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on January 5th, 2014
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8 Pack - Rockstar Super Sours Green Apple - 16oz.

Rockstar Recovery Energy/Tea/Lemonade

Rockstar Recovery Energy/Tea/Lemonade

First let’s look at the pros:
This is a non-carbonated energy drink. While it’s not entirely novel, but it’s a nice option regardless. On top of that it is also an iced tea energy drink. Something about that makes it seem more natural, even though there are unnatural things afoot. The sugar content is on the lower side for these types of drinks, which is always appreciated. The final plus is that it doesn’t taste like a typical energy drink. The weird chemical candy taste is not present at all. When companies can achieve that, they get my attention.

Now on to the cons:
This smells like a cheap lemon flavored iced tea, and the taste is right there as well. This tastes like it should be a close relative to Brisk. While that may be a very good thing for some people, I personally am not a fan of that fake tea taste. In fact, this doesn’t taste like a “half and half” at all. There is no classic lemonade flavor in this can, it’s just an overly lemon iced tea. Again, perhaps that’s good for some, but I’m not on board. The final con is that along with the glucose this also has sucralose in it. That is the reason for the lower levels of sugar, but it also takes the flavor down a notch as you get hints of diet occasionally.

There it is. Take these lists and decide for yourself if this is the kind of thing you want to put in your body or not. I personally did not make it through the entire can.

Website
http://www.rockstar69.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Glucose
Categories
Energy Drink, Iced Tea, Lemonade
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on November 27th, 2013
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16 Pack - Rockstar Recovery Energy / Hydration - Tea / Lemonade - 15.5oz.

Rockstar Pure Zero Punched

Rockstar Pure Zero Punched

Why is it these days that when energy drink companies decide to make add a diet version to their line that uses either erythritol or stevia it has a fruit punch flavor? Why not just go with your flagship flavor, and not something that is not a staple in your line? Are people out there really clamoring so much for new fruit punch drinks, especially those of the diet variety?

This isn’t all that terrible for a diet fruit punch, but as a friend pointed out, if you can’t take the sugar, leave the punch on the shelf. It doesn’t matter how many pennies you throw in the wishing well, it will never taste the way you want it to. Luckily for everyone involved this is a Hawiian Punch style fruit punch, but more of the classic not a mouthful of syrup variety.

Here are a few final thoughts for you that are a bit disjointed. Fruit punch is a beverage for children. Children shouldn’t consume energy drinks. Energy drinks shouldn’t be flavored like fruit punch. Diet and fruit punch have no place together. This doesn’t make me want to die drinking it, yet I stand by my previous statements.

Website
http://www.rockstar69.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Erythritol
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on November 25th, 2013
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16 Pack - Rockstar Pure Zero Punched - 16oz.

Rockstar Recovery Grape

Rockstar Recovery Grape

I believe there is a flaw in the basic nature of this beverage. How I see it is that you would want to drink an energy drink prior to doing strenuous activity that would require hydration. Wouldn’t you want that extra boost to help you push through whatever it is that you’re doing? Does added hydration do anything previous to any sort of workout? I suppose you could sip this while you are in the process of whatever it is that you are doing. Would the energy boost hit you in time though? I certainly don’t get it.

Another thing that I don’t get is the flavor. Grape has got to be one of the easiest flavors ever (right along side orange), yet they have somehow messed it up with this. What little non-diet/energy flavor that is present almost tastes more berry than grape. Whatever it is, it’s not very pleasant. It’s certainly doesn’t taste good enough to denote a 24oz can.

I’m going to stick to the one serving out of the three that are in this can, and introduce the rest to the drainage system in my house. It has no place in my person.

Website
http://www.rockstar69.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucrose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink, Sports/Dietary Supplement
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on October 14th, 2013
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8 Pack - Rockstar Recovery Energy + Hydration - Orange - 16oz.

Rockstar Recovery Orange

Rockstar Recovery Orange

Does anyone else have second thoughts about drinking a beverage that pops when you twist off the cap and an eerie smoke pours out of the opening? I feel like I should be wearing a has mat suit with some thick gloves that you can handle uranium with. Essentially it makes me feel like this beverage should not exist outside of some lab somewhere.

Being as I am a scientist, specifically one with a degree in drinkology (no , not like some pretentious mixologist, I had to spend eight years in college to get my degree), I through caution of radioactivity to the wind an dove in head first. By that I mean I took a small tentative sip. I can safely say that this does not taste nuclear, and I have no fear of my pee coming out glowing later.

The strange thing about this beverage is that it is made with real orange juice (it’s the second ingredient, but it’s only 3% of the whole), yet it still tastes like Tang. Have they ever thought of marketing this as an energy drink for astronauts? I imagine that is exactly what space explorers do not need though. They’re stuck up in orbit for months at a time with, what I expect is little to do for a good portion of their days. Why would they want to be all hopped up on energy drinks? I think I would like to sleep through as much as that experience as possible. So yeah, nix that idea.

As part of the recovery line this beverage is meant to give you energy as well as hydrate you. Think of it as Rockstar meets Gatorade with sexy results!!! Wait, that’s not right. There is nothing sexy about this. It tastes like Gatorade made a Tang flavor and then they added a bit of an energy compound to it. It doesn’t taste too much like chemicals, but it’s there around the edges. Actually it’s there in a way that makes it taste vaguely diet, even though it’s sweetened with sucrose.

On a side note, while I do like the idea that it is in a resealable can, I have to say that about a third of the sips I took resulted in some sort of splash back that got on my clothes. Either they need to work on the design a bit, or I need to learn how to drink properly.

Website
http://www.rockstar69.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucrose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink, Sports/Dietary Supplement
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on September 1st, 2013
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8 Pack - Rockstar Recovery Energy + Hydration - Orange - 16oz.

Rockstar Energy Water Orange Tangerine

Rockstar Energy Water Orange Tangerine

Gerald, you just won a big race but I didn't tell you that I have a flat tire and we actually have to run to return this copy of "Bridemaids" to the video store and it closes in fifteen minutes. I have for you a small bottle of energy water. It's like water but it's got some extra goodies in it. What goodies? I don't know; what am I, a scientist? Did I make the drink? No, Gerald. I did not make the drink. Every minute that we're stuck talking about the drink is time that you could be running to the video store. Yeah, I'm surprised that they made the movie on VHS, too but they did. What do I look like, Gerald? A rich person? Only rich people use DVDs. Blu-Ray? What's that?

What does it taste like? Jesus Christ, Gerald. It tastes a little like Tang but a little bit thicker and a little bit more diet. It's good. I had one and I'm wasting my energy talking to you about the where's'it's and who's'it's of this drink. Just get out of here. You don't have to worry about your precious figure because there are no calories in the entire bottle.

Thank you, Gerald, for finally returning my video. Now when you get there, see if they have a VHS copy of "Bachlorette." I'm on a real "bad girl wedding" tear right now.

Website
http://www.rockstar69.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Energy Drink, Sports/Dietary Supplement
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on August 20th, 2013
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Rockstar Energy Water Blueberry Pomegranate Acai

Rockstar Energy Water Blueberry Pomegranate Acai

Oh you hate energy drinks? First, "hate" is a strong word. Hate should only be assigned to things like racism, which should, in itself be abolished. Such a vague, ignorant statement, but I'm saying that the word "hate" should be more reserved than it is.

Secondly, you can now put an asterisk next to your previous ignorant statement because this doesn't taste like an energy drink. It is still an energy drink, yet it actually tastes pretty good. It tastes a little like everything and a lot like fruit punch. The acai is a little overpowering but not offensively. The pomegranate and blueberry are there but not really distinguishing enough to call them what they are.

Fruit distinction aside, this is good. It's light, not too sweet, and still a deceiving energy drink. You tricky bastard. You're going to accidentally make parents lose their mind because they're going to buy juice thinking it's just juice and they will read the fine print and quickly realize why their kids are just non-stop running around in circles constantly narrowly avoiding the grasp of the parent's hands. Sorry parents. Don't say that I didn't warn you.

Website
http://www.rockstar69.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Energy Drink, Sports/Dietary Supplement
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on August 14th, 2013
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Rockstar Recovery Lemonade

Rockstar Recovery Lemonade

Right off the bat I would like to, like a solid jerk, stay on both sides of this fence. On one side, the one with the greener grass, hotter women, and more delicious hot dogs, this is a good energy drink. It tastes like alright lemonade but that's good because it doesn't taste like uber-sweet energy drinks. It doesn't have that offensive diet taste unless you let it sit there and drop to room temperature. That's when the sucrose rears its ugly head. These are all good with a little asterisk next to it what with it being a diet energy drink.

The other side of the fence filled with gross, wet hot dogs, women with poor teeth and even worse personal hygiene, and dead, dog urine soaked grass, come the bad parts. My gosh I would like these heart palpitations to stop. I ate a full lunch. A big old Greek-ish wrap filled with delicious fixins. Still, about a half hour after I started I'm having strange heartbeats. I thought this would be different because I ate but nope. I felt like I could run up and down the stairs a trillion times or that I should to work off the bad beats my ticker was making.

So there you go. Take your side. If you and your heart can take a punch, you are in luck. If you are sensitive to energy drinks I ask you to stay away and just drink coffee for your jolts.

Website
http://www.rockstar69.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucrose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink, Lemonade
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on August 6th, 2013
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16 Pack - Rockstar Recovery Energy + Hydration - Lemonade - 16oz.

Rockstar Super Sours Energy Drink Bubbleberry

Rockstar Super Sours Energy Drink Bubbleberry

Two facts about me: I like sour things and I like energy drinks. Put them together and theoretically I will be very happy. Aside from the mash up flavor name of "Bubbleberry", this would have been one of the first drinks I would have proposed if I got a job at Rockstar.

Other things I will do in my first week at my less-than-ideal job at Rockstar include:


  • Take the star out of the logo.

  • Fire anyone who played "All Star" by Smash Mouth, "Rock Superstar" by Cypress Hill, or any other song that featured some play of "rock star" heavily in the lyrics.

  • Make this drink not so gross by keeping the awesome sour taste but adding a good flavor to it that didn't taste like energy drink battery acid.

  • Secure a deal with Rockstar Games to trade energy drinks for free video games for all employees.

  • Ensure "Bubbleberry" is never on another Rockstar can ever again.

  • Taco tuesdays.

Website
http://www.rockstar69.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucrose
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Derek Neuland on April 10th, 2013
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8 Pack - Rockstar Super Sours Energy Drink - Bubbleberry - 16oz.

Rockstar Iced Peach + Tea + Electrolytes

Rockstar Iced Peach + Tea + Electrolytes

Welcome back to another episode of “Board Room Shenanigans.” As always we are brought to you by the three lovely fellows at Thirsty Dudes. This series helps to fill in the gaps as to why certain drinks taste like they do. Sometimes you have to wonder how some drinks make it onto the shelves. Here at the show we like to think we shed some light on the subject. Now onto today’s episode….

Gentlemen, the world of energy drinks is shifting and I will not see our empire crumble because we did not get with the times. Consumers are demanding more than just candy flavored sparkling drinks that will keep them up all night. As our competitors have proven the clients want real flavors and new styles. I thought we would be alright since we put that relaxation drink on the market, but people still want new energy drinks. What are everyone’s ideas? Juice infused with whatever it is that gives our drinks energy? Well first off, as a member of this board you really should know what those ingredients are. We don’t need a scandal on our hands. Secondly, do you think I want to hemorrhage money? Do you know how much fruit juice costs in comparison to the sugar water we put out now? There’s no way we could do that and keep our profits high. Energy shots? Those are so last year. Energized iced tea? I think you may be onto something! That’s something new and tea can be the cheapest thing ever. Let’s take it up a notch though, so people think they are getting a little extra for their money. Let’s make it peach iced tea.

In order to keep costs low we’re going to need to use the ghettoest tea ever. You know those gallons of tea you can find in gas stations for 99 cents that are more sugar water than tea? Well, we need to use something like that, but make it even more peach flavored sugar water and less tea. We’ll mix all of that up with our patented energy mix, which off the record I think tastes like toxic waste and we have a new product on our hands that the kids will eat up. Non-carbonated energy drinks are going to be the wave of the future and we’re going to be riding the crest. Who cares if our product will taste like garbage? It’s so new that people will eat it up and by the time they realize just how gross it is, we’ll be sold out and have a new product on the market.

Website
http://www.rockstar69.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Energy Drink, Iced Tea
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on August 8th, 2012
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8 Pack - Rockstar Iced Energy - Peach + Tea + Electrolytes - 16oz.
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