Big Jak (2 reviews)

Big Jak Iced Peach + Tea + Electrolytes

Big Jak Iced Peach + Tea + Electrolytes

Big Jak was a gambling man. He loved to play the ponies, roll the dice, and more importantly bet on the outcome of cards. Black Jack was his game. He loved it so much that he thought about starting to call himself “Big Black Jak,” but that just didn’t sound right to him, cause…well you know.

In his off time Big Jak spent his time developing beverages. He would spend hours and hours slaving away to get the balance of everything just right. The problem was that just like with the cards he always bet big. You see Big Jak may have loved black jack, but that does not mean he was any good at the game. He always bet everything he had, and had the dealer hit him, no matter what. He was so enamored with getting exactly 21 that he lost nearly every hand. This spilled over into his beverage making. The quantities of his flavorings were so high that it made them nearly undrinkable. Take this energy drink he worked on. It would have been nice to have a tasty non-carbonated energy drink that tasted like iced tea, but of course he had to go overboard. Even though he used sucralose, he used too much and it tasted so overly sweetened that you couldn’t even make out the tea flavor. In addition to that he decided to add some artificial peach flavor to it that made it just plain awful. Never before has a fruit flavoring existed that tasted so fake.

Sadly, shortly after the release of this beverage Big Jak’s bookies came looking for him and things did not bode well for him. That is why we talk about Big Jak in the past tense.

Website
http://bigjak.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink, Iced Tea
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on December 13th, 2013
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Big Jak Red Jak Energy Drink

Big Jak Red Jak Energy Drink

Hey Jak! It's you and me buddy. Let's go for a ride, and by ride I mean via horseback, because due to your name, Red Jak, you are obviously a cowboy. So let's see what these dusty trails have to offer us.

Well it seems that you ride a donkey Jak. I say that because you taste like a drink for children, and that is what children ride on the prairie. Energy drinks for children. That is probably one of the worst ideas ever. I feel like their little hearts wouldn't be able to handle it. Perhaps their tiny veins are too delicate and they would just burst. I don't want to think about these things. Kids stay away from energy drinks. You're young. You naturally have all the energy you need.

To clarify I'm not saying Big Red targets this product towards children, but it tastes like they would love it. It doesn't taste like ten thousand chemical Smarties. It tastes like a berry-flavored soda that is heavy on the strawberry. It reminds me of those Asian gums that come in little boxes with four gumballs. They are really fluffy. I love that gum.

There you have it. Jak's donkey is all tuckered out and won't leave the troth. I on the other hand am carrying my horse around because I'm all amped up from the drink.

Website
http://bigjak.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on May 24th, 2011
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