Cintron (29 reviews)

Cintron Strawberry Hibiscus Iced Tea

Cintron Strawberry Hibiscus Iced Tea

Don't tell Jay, but I'm just drinking this now. It's been over a year since we've had it and I've been saving it for, well, now I guess. Was it worth it? Not really. No. It's not bad but I wanted this to blow my socks off. I've got this strange idea of what hibiscus should taste like and it rarely does. I've had a couple drinks that are absolutely stellar but I really think that I, me, myself, know what hibiscus really is supposed to taste like.

That aside, here is this drink. For those that know what things are supposed to taste like, this is a good drink. It’s right on the fence between an iced tea and a juice. It's not bad at all. We've got hibiscus and then a strawberry aftertaste and then a moderately sweetened black tea sitting in the middle like the cream in an Oreo. I would love to have a strawberry hibiscus Oreos. I'm going to imagine that as I take my final sip of this long awaited bottle of iced tea. Sorry it's taken me so long, Jay.

Website
http://www.cintron21.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Cane Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on April 29th, 2013
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Cintron Strawberry Hibiscus Iced Tea 12/14oz

Cintron Grapeade

Cintron Grapeade

All morning for no reason in particular we were talking about The Chapelle Show and how great it was. It seriously came out of nowhere and we talked about it for an hour. It was a wonderful three seasons that ended too soon.

I knew I had some "purple drink" down in my pile so I picked it out, refrigerated it, and here we are. I know the "purple drink" he's referring to and that is not great. It's like that age-old discussion that you have with friends about if Skittles taste different because it's like 49% water, 50% sugar, and 1% flavoring. I never, not even as a kid, like "_________ Flavored Drink" because it's a bad imitation of an imitation. This drink is only one tier deep so it's closer to what an actual grape tastes like but still, not what grapes taste like. It sweet, it's juice, it's purple. That seems to be all it takes to pass the grape exam. This isn't terrible, though. It's absolutely drinkable and after a nice long lunch walk with "work dudes," it's just what I needed.

Website
http://www.cintron21.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Juice
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on May 14th, 2012
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Cintron Papaya Ade

Cintron Papaya Ade

I don't know what "ade" is. I'm no dummy but I assume that "lemons" need to be involved. Lemon"ade" lime"ade". I guess that limes could be involved, too. Ade must mean something else. Is "ade" just another word for juice? I mean lemonade is really nothing other than lemon juice with sugar in it. I guess I just cracked the code. Problem solved. Plus one for me. Minus one for, oh I don't know, racism.

For a juice, or newly discovered "ade", this is great. I have eaten papaya but rarely. I have drunk far more papaya related drinks that I have even touched real papaya. This is not due to me being unworldly; it’s just that I don't often fondle fruits I'm not going to buy. It was very fruity, though. There is apple juice in there, but who cares. You can't have a papaya puree ade because that would just be a puree which would be a different animal all together. It wasn't too sweet and defiantly left me wanting more. Even though I have an empty bottle next to me, I still want to open it and hope that I can get some residual drips. I might have already tried that once or twice so I doubt that the third time will be the charm.

Website
http://www.cintron21.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Cane Sugar
Categories
Juice
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on April 11th, 2012
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Cintron Mandarin Raspberry Iced Tea

Cintron Mandarin Raspberry Iced Tea

This drink was a castaway in the sea of beverages that flows in and out of the homes of the Thirsty Dudes. We’ve reviewed 25 different drinks from Cintron, and I’m pretty sure this is the last one left. When Derek left to move back to Portland last week Mike and I raided his cupboards and stole all of the drinks that he wasn’t going to be able to take with him. I personally expected it to be the lowest of the low like Mike and I have sitting around, the things we are just dreading writing reviews for. As it turns out there were quite a few gems in there, this being one of them.

For such an unusual flavor for iced tea, it doesn’t seem that odd when you drink it. Sure orange has been in hot tea for eons (literally eons, are you calling me a liar?) but how often do you see it in an iced variety. I have seen possible 2 or 3 companies that have it in their product line. Raspberry? That’s old news. Combine the two and you have something new and exciting that doesn’t taste too extreme. Fill up a glass for a friend and dollars to donuts they wouldn’t even ask about the flavor, yet when you know the flavor you detect a subtle orange flavor hidden in an otherwise ordinary raspberry tea. It’s great, and I’m glad we got to potentially close out this company with yet another great review.

Website
http://www.cintron21.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Cane Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on March 13th, 2012
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Cintron Iced Tea with Lemon

Cintron Iced Tea with Lemon

Lemons are so social. They are the team players of Fruitland. They'll go anywhere and do anything. What drink line doesn't have a lemon flavored drink, or at least lemon as an additive? I don't hate lemons. Unless it's lemonade, there is a different lemon taste. You only get the sting on lemonade. I think that lemonade is a lemon's pet project. That's where they have their best foot forward.

Drinks like this is where the blue-collar lemons go. It's not bad. They're there. You can taste them. They're not in their finest state, but they're there. It's a black tea with lemon in it. Simple. I'm not offended by the corn syrup as this is right on par with "the rival" tallboy. You know the one.

This is fine. Dandy even. Lemons, keep up the good work. Sure, for some reason Jay doesn't like you, but he's strange. He's got Spice Girls and Bauhaus in his music collection. Lemons are fine, Jay.

Website
http://www.cintron21.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on March 5th, 2012
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Cintron Lite Half and Half

Cintron Lite Half and Half

You know what, Mr. Waitress; I'm sick and tired of this. I come here day after day and I don't know why. You always get my order wrong, all of the wait staff has a terrible attitude and the pop is usually flat. I got one exceptional meal here and I won't give this place up because I feel that one day it will be that good again. It hasn't been. I've been keeping my mouth shut for months now but this is the last straw.

The only think I asked for is sweet tea and you only have diet. It's not awful, but it's half way to really diet tasting. To make matters worse, you only had enough for half a glass. Now what am I going to do with this. I just filled up on crackers and I am exceptionally thirsty. Mix it with something? What do you propose? Lemonade? Who do I look like, Arnold freakin' Palmer. Yeah, sure. Lemonade me up.

Oh, and another thing. I can't stand...when...the thing is...I...I...I'm sorry. I've had a rough day and all I wanted was a Black and Blue burger. When you brought me a bacon burger, it was half the straw that broke the camel's back. The half diet lemonade was now the savior because this isn't half bad. Sure, it's still a little diet, but the lemonade saves it. It tastes like "kid-made" lemonade. This might be some of the best diet half and half I've ever had.

You, my good sir, have done it. "Done what" you ask? You have roped me into coming here again and again now that you gave me this. It's redeeming. Please, sir. I just ask you one more simple thing. Do you have any more chocolate cream pie? I saw it on your specials board. You don't. Well, how about that. Let down again. You'd better have this concoction in here next time I come or I'm really going to make a stink!

Website
http://www.cintron21.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Diet, Iced Tea, Lemonade
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on February 26th, 2012
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Cintron Toronja

Cintron Toronja

Oh man. How am I going to do a 500 word essay on the Emancipation Proclamation in...oh jeez. Fourteen minutes. First thing's first, I need something to drink. This high school is strange. I don't know who is stocking this cooler, but there is no Pepsi or Gatorade or anything I've ever heard of before, just this Cintron stuff. Toronja? I don't know what that is but I do enjoy a good iced tea.

Alright, pen to paper. Let's do this. Oh, this tea is good. It's lightly citrus'd but it is just sweetened tea. What?! Ten minutes? I've only put my name on this piece of paper. Ahhh! Alright, one more sip and I'm cracking down on this paper. This is good tea, man. It's very clean tasting. Not too sweet like a southern style sweet tea but it's got the same ingredients. Eight minutes?! Alright, alright. Let's start.

Emancipation Proclamation, by Mitch Fandis.
Slavery is bad. The president, Abraham Lincoln did not like it. He wanted slavery to be abolished. Not everyone hated slavery, though. The south enjoyed slavery. They used slaves on their plantations. Cider House Rules was a movie about slavery.

There. That's about...less than 50 words? Oh man. I don't know what else to say about it. I can re-write this, double space it, and write larger. That will get me to a whole page. Ahh, the tricks of a tenth grader.

Website
http://www.cintron21.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Cane Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on January 25th, 2012
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Cintron Lemon Lime Mojito

Cintron Lemon Lime Mojito

I don't know anything about anything. I always assumed that anything mojito was mint. I don't know the historical travels of the word, the Latin meaning. I just assumed that it was always mint and rum or gin or something. Vodka? I don't know anything. This might be a poor representation of a mojito in regards to it supposedly being mint and Cintron just forgetting the mint. I will tell you, though. Lemon and lime in a black tea make one fantastic Ménage à trois. I don't mean that in a sexual fashion because if there is ever a day where black tea, or just leaves, lemons, and lives are rocking the sheets, I hope to be either far from dead or below them to catch whatever comes out. Maybe that's how this was made. Maybe I have lost my mind this Christmas break since I just said that. What if I got some sort of brain damage for Christmas? Ugh, worse than socks and worse than underwear. This drink is no mint, all real lemon and lime mixed with a great sweetened tea. All natural. No grossness.

I'm going to cut this while I am at, what I hope, is my lowest point. Please...sitting underneath fruits and leaves having sex. Disgusting.

Website
http://www.cintron21.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Cane Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on December 29th, 2011
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Cintron Liquid Energy Shot Cranberry Splash

Cintron Liquid Energy Shot Cranberry Splash

New Review:
Since we have given such good marks to all of their other products, Cintron sent us another bottle of this and asked us if we’d try again. I had no problem with it, especially since Derek said he actually liked this one. The company sent it and it’s been sitting on my shelf for a month or two.

I finally got around to trying it today, and I don’t know what my problem was before. Sure it’s not the greatest tasting thing in the world, but neither are any energy shots. Maybe I got a bad one before, who knows. All I can say now is that it tastes like diet cranberry juice concentrate with energy drink junk in it. I wouldn’t drink huge glasses of it, but you’re not meant to. It tastes more like diet cranberries than it does energy garbage, and that is all you can really ask for. I’m bumping you from a 1 to a 3 Cranberry Splash. I hope you’re happy with your new home.


Old Review:
Cintron knows how to make a tasty energy drink. They have even managed to make some quality energy shots, which are by definition disgusting. Unfortunately with this offering they have fallen short. The bitterness of the cranberry flavor does not help the already gross energy shot flavor. Instead of masking the grossness, it possibly makes it worse. The sucralose used to sweeten it makes it taste like diet toxic waste. I'm sorry Cintron. I really wish we could have given you all top marks, but this is probably the worst energy shot I've ever tasted. So dear readers you should just pick up their other flavors. They are a company that deserves to be able to shine.

Website
http://www.cintron21.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Energy Drink, Shot
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on December 14th, 2011
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Cintron Liquid Energy Citrus Mango

Cintron Liquid Energy Citrus Mango

The past couple of days have really been kicking my keister. Due to the holiday, and general gluttony, I've been eating way too much food. That coupled with the fact that it's dark by 6pm has caused me to get sleepy way early. Yesterday I took a step towards being the old man that I've been striving to become by taking a nap. Today I had too much stuff to do, so I partook in this little treat.

Does it taste like mango? Not really. Does it taste like a citrus fruit punch? You betcha. It has a slight chemical/candy energy drink taste, but for the most part it tastes like a citrus juice. I really wish stores around here sold this line of Cintron energy drinks, because I have yet to have one that I dislike and for some unscientific reason (very unlike us Thirsty Dudes) I don't feel as bad when I drink one of these. Even though they aren't made with real fruit juice, they sure taste like they are, and I will let me mind continue to pretend that they are.

Website
http://www.cintron21.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on November 25th, 2011
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Cintron Citrus Mango Energy Drink
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