Simply Balanced (3 reviews)

Simply Balanced Essence Water Strawberry Watermelon

Simply Balanced Essence Water Strawberry Watermelon

Part of an essence water is that it doesn't really taste like much. This, on the other hand, not at all following directions, tastes like a Stevia laced hard candy. There is natural sugar in it but it's almost to the "what's the point" line where it tastes primarily of said artificial sweetener. It's not bad but it is very, very sweet and tastes entirely of a juice and nothing like flavored or essence water.

As far as strawberries and watermelons are concerned, yes, they are in there. If you keep it in your mouth and swish it around you can taste those two rumbling around like a couple of unbuckled children in the way back of an early ninety's station wagon. As soon as you swallow, you get a rush of everything that Stevia has to offer which you can take at however you feel about her and her doings.

I don't know the rules of naming a beverage but I like to think that I've been around the block enough to know that this was mislabeled.

Website
http://www.target.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Sports/Dietary Supplement, Water
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on July 16th, 2013
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Simply Balanced Hibiscus Green Tea

Simply Balanced Hibiscus Green Tea

Nothing says "America" like green tea. Wait...that's not right. That's China. That's not America. What am I doing drinking this? I should be drinking something like an apple pie pop or a Coke. I'm outside with a handful of people wearing red, white, and blue and I just ate hot dogs and hamburgers. What's more patriotic than that? Not too much.

This tea is pretty good but that doesn't come without any caveats. It's listed as a green tea but tastes more like a white tea. I don't care and am not at all disappointed. The hibiscus, for the first time in a long time, tastes like what I wanted. It's "mostly" sweetened with sugar but there is some Reb-A in there that leaves you with a little bit of a bitter taste. Combined with the bitterness of the "green" tea, you get a good amount of bite.

If you don't like Reb-A, you might still not like this drink. If you are still cool with that guy, you should like it. It's got a nice flavor all around and is forty calories for the whole bottle. I wish I had another iced cold one right now. That would be America. Ice cold green tea with herbal essence in it; the flower, not the shampoo. That would be absolutely gross. That is not America.

Website
http://www.target.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on July 4th, 2013
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Simply Balanced Essence Water Blood Orange

Simply Balanced Essence Water Blood Orange

I do get excited when I see new drinks. Not to discredit them at all, but I do get a bit discouraged when they are store brand drinks. Target's Nature Market or whatever it's called has some pretty good stuff but I can't help but feel like it's just rebranded stuff from some other company that was nice enough to sell to Target. Target, you guys are alright. I spend a lot of time inside of you in the least gross way possible but in the most gross way possible, there are always horrifically gigantic turds in your toilet and you should maybe patrol them a bit more. To drinks!

I do enjoy blood orange and I do enjoy essence waters like Hint and Ayala's so when I saw this and it was colored, I was a bit skeptical. "Essence" implies...well...magic flavors are extracted and injected into the drink. Never have I seen one with color, which just makes me think that it's a "Vitamin Water" type drink. That's fine if it is, but don't call it an "essence" drink. Call it something else. There is an association between words in this language we use and when you call something a specific title, people think it's going to be something. End rant. Begin review again.

This was a good drink. I don't know if I have ever seen let alone eaten a blood orange but this is good in comparison to other blood orange drinks. It was light and was sweetened by both regular old man sugar and new jack Stevia derivative, which Jay scoffed at but I rather enjoyed. You didn't get it until the very end. It wasn't too heavily sweetened even with the team of sweeteners and fruity so I would say that it was a success. Target! Another success!

Website
http://www.target.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Sports/Dietary Supplement, Water
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on June 24th, 2013
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