Lebanon - 8 Reviews

This is one of those drinks that you have to check and then check again to make sure that they are in fact not alcoholic. The look of the bottle just screams, “This will get you drunk without tasting like alcohol!” If it were something along the lines of a Mike's Hard something or other I would not be surprised. After checking it for a third time I am finally convinced that this is “safe,” so I'm ready to dive in.

My first thought is that this is not nearly as sweet as I anticipated. Actually my first thought was thank god I didn't miss something and this isn't alcoholic, but the sweetness thing crept into my mind directly after. I had expected it to be ridiculously sweet like other apple sodas I've tried that leave your salivary glands seeping sweet apple flavor for hours.

I then thought, well this actually kind of tastes like apples and not artificial garbage. 20% apple juice will do that to a soda. This is a little bit of okay in a bottle that I had severe doubts about. I would happily drink this again and in a blind taste test of apple sodas it might not be the ultimate winner, but it would be in the upper echelon.

I still believe that you could give a bunch of these to high school kids and tell them they were alcoholic and watch as they got progressively drunker as they drank them. Actually, I kind of what to do exactly that right now. Kids can be so dumb when they want to seem cool. I cant wait to mess with Mike's kid when he's a teenager.

Danny's daddy always told him to stay away from certain areas of town. He told them they were dangerous and an unsavory element hung out there. Since as far back as he could remember Danny's ears were filled with warnings of the danger just a few miles away. His imagination made these areas out to be war zones torn apart by drug dealers and road warriors (he was a huge early Mel Gibson fan). His nights were filled with nightmares of being stuck in these areas and having to fight his way out after saving the president (he also love Escape From New York). There was absolutely no way that he would ever set foot in those neighborhoods. He liked being alive and not strung out, and he wanted to keep it that way.

When Danny was 16 he got his license and his daddy let him take the car out for a ride to celebrate. He left home, and got on the highway to go pick up his cousin so they could go do a few laps at the mall and score some Orange Julius and soft pretzels. It was going to be a good night. He got a few miles from home and without warning the car ran out of gas. He was luckily able to coast over to the side of the road, right before an exit. “Oh no” thought Danny. This was the exit that led to one of the bad neighborhoods that his father spoke of. He had no choice but to walk off the exit and find a gas station or a phone. Seeing as he was only 16 and his parents weren't insane, he did not have a cell phone. He shoved his hands in his pockets put his head down and began to walk. As got off the exit onto the main road he was surprised to not hear any screams or to see any buildings burning. Actually it didn't look that much different than where he lived. Luckily there was a small mart a block away. Out side the door Danny paused, drew in a deep breath and pushed open the door. He was instantly greeted by the shop keep who also informed him that there was not a pay phone, but that he was welcomed to use the store phone to call for assistance. Danny made his call to his deeply concerned daddy, and then continued to make some small talk with the cashier. He was a nice funny man, who even offered Danny a soda. It was like nothing Danny had ever seen before. He was shocked to discover it was from Lebanon. For all he knew there was nothing but bombed out buildings there and poor people. It was also kiwi flavored, which Danny had never heard of in a soda. He expected it to just taste overly sweet and “green.” He twisted off the gap and took a sip. It did taste a little sweeter than how he normally liked his soda, but he had to admit it really did taste like kiwi, which was a huge surprise. It did taste a little candy like, but in a way that wasn't gross at all. It was also a shocker to find out that this was a pop that actually had fruit juice in it. The soda was delicious and before he knew it the bottle was gone and his daddy was pulling into the parking lot. He thanked the cashier and left, quickly turning around to buy a sixer of this wonderful soda and gave his thanks again. As he climbed into his dad's car he thought of several things: A. This neighborhood really was kind of nice. B. He dad was a racist. C. His dad was really a jerk for letting him borrow the car with no gas in it, and without telling him the fuel gauge didn't work. What a prick.

Along the I-90 in South Buffalo lies the abandoned Buffalo Malting Company. It's funny because I must have driven past it nearly a thousand times in my life, but it never registered. When someone mentioned it to me I actually had to put effort into finding it. I passed by twice until I realized where it was. It had become so engrained (no pun intended) in my mind as part of the scenery that I just wasn't registering it as an individual building. Then I saw a couple of jag off teenagers smashing things there. What fills people with the need to destroy things for no reason other than destroying it? It's infuriating. Sure it's abandoned but it's apart of the cities history and it's interesting to see what has been left behind.

I'm 99.9% sure that the grain that was processed in that building was never used to make soda, but a guy can dream can't he? I just picture it back in the 50's and the guys are strolling into work carrying their huge metal lunch pals with smiles on their faces because they know their hard work is going to make tasty sodas for the world to enjoy. During their shifts their minds will wander wondering what flavoring will be added to the malt. Will it be pineapple, grape or maybe a nice fancy raspberry? They each would get a case to bring home to the family on weekends and everyone would gather around the picnic table eating hot dogs and washing them down with a nice delicious malt.

The problem with this scenario is that I just cannot see kids enjoying malt soda right off of the bat. I think it's something of an acquired taste. I certainly didn't like it the first time I had it (I still think straight up malt drinks like Malta Goya are very high on the list of worst drinks ever). They have a weird grainy barley taste to them. It's like a non-alcoholic beer, which is also disgusting. The more I drink them to review for Thirsty Dudes the more I appreciate the complexity of the flavor. Perhaps if you grew up drinking them since you were little it would be a flavor that you loved. This particular malt would definitely take a shorter time to grow into. It's got a nice raspberry taste similar to a lot of raspberry iced teas, but instead of being mixed with tea it is mixed with processed grains. Strange, but who am I to judge? Oh yeah, I'm a professional drinkologist.

Shirley Temples: The saviors of the non-drinking world at bars at bowling alleys across the world. Even though it has a cutesy name that makes it seem like a kid's drink, it is a tasty beverage that I have drank quite a lot in my life. The ingredients in this glorious drink are either ginger ale or lemon lime soda and grenadine syrup. Grenadine syrup is a thick, well syrup, which tastes like cherries.

As one would expect this tastes like a Shirley Temple, with the proportions reversed. It's more cherry syrup than it is lemon lime. It leaves something to be desired though. It tastes more like sugar and syrup than it does cherries. If you want something like this I suggest going into a bar and having one of your friends order you a Shirley Temple with their beer, as to not get a stupid look from the bartender when you ask for it yourself. Judgmental pricks.

What did I just say? What did I just say? Remember when your dad said that to you when you "deliberately" disobeyed him for a second time? You didn't mean to, but sometimes it just happened, like you were half way into a killer swing and had to follow through and you didn't mean for that baseball to go through the neighbor's window.

Anyhow. What did I just say? Didn't I say that I wanted a watermelon pop? I did. What did I find on a quest for new and foreign drinks? You guessed it. Watermelon pop. One step better, though, it was cane sugar and not far from my house and it had other flavored friends to accompany it.

Without hesitation, I grabbed it and ran out the door, after paying the cashier/proprietor/cook/stock boy/floor manager. I went home, threw it in my crisper drawer and let it sit and think about what it had done. A week, maybe two later, I thought that today would be the day and it certainly was. This drink was sweet. I don't know how I drank the whole thing but I did. It's labeled as a sparkling fruit drink, but that just means "pop", right? It does to me. It did taste like a watermelon Jolly Rancher, which if that's what you're looking for, is right up your alley.

We found these in a local halal market if you want to know where to get them.

I think it's safe to say that all of our readers are familiar with classic orange soda. It doesn't really taste like an orange at all, but it's still pretty good under certain circumstances. You know, like picnics and barbecues. It's a kid's soda that is acceptable to drink in instances where you want to pretend you're still a child. Who am I kidding? I enjoy it and I drink it whenever the fancy strikes me. Does that mean I'm a child? Probably.

In a shift from those sodas there are a handful of companies out there who are making a soda that is actually made with orange juice. It's a true orange soda. I for one love them. It's the adult version of the barbecue favorite. It's not as thick and has a better flavor in my opinion.

A drink called California Garden that is made in Lebanon. Well that makes sense. I don't even think pineapples can grow in Lebanon. There's some sort of mystery here that needs to be solved! I more than likely only think that because I started re-watching X-Files. I'm going to see conspiracy everywhere now.

Besides the great Lebanon cover up this what I like in a juice. Firstly, it's actually made from pineapple. You would think that would be a given, but through doing this site I've learned that "juices" are pretty artificial more than you would expect. Secondly, it's filled with wonderful chunks of fruit. We here at Thirsty Dudes really can't get enough of "chunky drinks" as we call them. This is different than most. Normally the chunks are soft and chewy. Since these chunks are pieces of pineapple they are a lot harder than I'm accustomed to. I was able to quickly adapt.

Ohhhh Bethany, this has chunks in it. Why would you give me something with chunks in it? You know I don't like chunky. I like smooth. I like my peanut butter smooth. I like my spaghetti sauce smooth. I like my jazz smooth. I especially like my drinks smooth. Honest to goodness, Beth, why would you give me this? If I wanted something with chunks in it, don't you think that I would have let you know years ago? We've been married 17 years and you've never known me, even a little bit, to go against the grain. I'm an accountant. I drive a base model Toyota Camry. I only own black and dark navy suits and white and light blue dress shirts. I have three ties and two of them are navy. I eat my sandwiches with the crusts cut off. Chunks, Bethany?! You know what? I will take another sip of it because I see that you're getting attached to these strongly rooted opinions that I have on my lifestyle.

On second though...yeah...on second though this isn't so bad. It's a very good fruit taste, and those chunks are just chunks of real fruit, so it's not that far fetched. It's just like eating a really juicy watermelon but a mixed fruit flavored watermelon. There is even a nice buzz that your lips get from the tang of the real fruit. You know what, baby? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to take it out on you. This is actually a wonderfully delicious drink that I could see myself drinking again.

Bethany, here's $20. Go to the local Indian market, buy a mixed case of this stuff and meet me in the Camry. We're driving with the sunroof open today!