Canada (112 reviews)
Thirsty Buddha With Mango
The Buddha meditates under trees for long periods of time. He always starts the morning in the shade, but as the sun rises the sun ends up blaring on him and it gets hot, very hot. Let’s face it he’s also a big guy, so he sweats a lot. The Buddha knows it’s important to keep hydrated, so he always keeps a cooler of coconut water with him, so he doesn’t dry out and shrivel up.
He prefers to drink straight up coconut water with nothing added to it, but sometimes when he’s not meditating into nothingness/everything he wants a little more and goes for some with a little mango juice in it. There’s not a whole ton of juice added to it, but it’s enough to give it a little flavor. The problem is the company he’s sponsored by also adds some sugar to it. The Buddha knows it’s unnecessary, but they don’t put too much in, so it’s not like it’s sugar water masquerading as coconut water. It’s simply mildly sweetened, lightly flavored coconut water that is a little chalky, but that’s what you get with all decent coconut waters. It refreshes him like only coconut water and enlightenment can.
- Website
- http://drinkthirstybuddha.com/
- Country
- Canada
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Categories
- Coconut
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper 4 days, 14 hours ago
- Comments
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Thirsty Buddha 100% All Natural Coconut Water
The stories and teachings have it all wrong. The tree that Gautama sat under that led him to become the Buddha was not a Bodhi tree as it was taught. In fact, the fat man was sitting under a coconut tree when he reached enlightenment. It's a good thing too, since reaching enlightenment can be truly dehydrating. Lucky for him the most hydrating beverage in the world hung directly over his head. So there you go: from enlightened to shaking a tree and dodging the fruits that descended towards his head within a couple of moments.
Several thousand years have passed since the glorious event and a company called Thirsty Buddha has arisen for a grand celebration in liquid form. All that is contained in this can is 100% all natural coconut water. There are no added sweeteners or preservatives, simply because they are not needed. This is delicious and refreshing; everything the Buddha needed on the day of his enlightenment. There are a lot of companies out there nowadays selling their versions of this "holy" drink, but most of them add extraneous ingredients that take away from the purity of what they create. They made mistakes, Thirsty Buddha did not.
To further offend the followers of Buddhism I shall leave you with the following perversion of faith an pop culture. Imagine the chorus of Destiny's Child's hit single Bootylicious with the lyrics changed to, "I don't think you're ready for this belly, cause his body's too Buddhalicious for ya babe."
- Website
- http://drinkthirstybuddha.com/
- Country
- Canada
- Sweetener
- No Sugar Added
- Categories
- Coconut
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 4/30/2013
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment
Red Rain Energy Drink Cran-Orange
If the marketing team at Red Rain has a single brain cell in their collective heads I would hope that they have contacted Peter Gabriel to use his song that is the same name as their company. Just imagine that chorus playing as slow motion shots of sports teams winning the big game and spraying each other with cans of energy drink. It would be like they were announcing that the sun has set on Gatorade in the energy drink age. It would be triumphant, and it’s a great song on top of that.
I don’t know if that’s the market they are looking to sell their beverages to, but it’s not the scenario that is important, it’s the song. It really is a great song, and I’m gonna say this is a fairly great energy drink at that. Cranberry should be used more in energy drinks. It covers up the typical candy flavor nicely. This has a predominately cranberry flavor with a nice citrus touch around the edges. It’s certainly not a typical flavor for an energy drink, which is nice.
Think about it; Peter Gabriel and an unusual tasting energy drink. Then think about all of the toonies pouring in, much like that self same red rain.
- Website
- http://redrainenergy.ca/
- Country
- Canada
- Sweetener
- Sugar/Glucose-Fructose
- Categories
- Energy Drink
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 3/3/2013
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment
True Blue Wild Blueberry
This is going to be half review, half reminiscence, and half celebrators since this is our 3000th review. Since all of them have to happen at the same time, let's just start with the Thirsty Dudes ode to new drinks. Jay and I went to Toronto and stopped periodically at multiple shops. Our love for Thirsty Dudes is international. We travel beyond both state and country lines just in order to get drinks. This is a juice. I had to present my passport to get juice. Come on. Would you do that? You might? We do. When we are on vacation, we do it big. I went to Brooklyn this past weekend on an impromptu "vacation" and number one thing on my list was to get local root beer. Come on. What a waste of time but we love it. We're in Canada and there is a Whole Foods. We bought a ton of stuff, like forty drinks each, and yes, like this one, some of them were "house brand" but things need to get done. Drinks need to get drank. Sure, it took me well over two months to drink it but hey, we've got a cache of drinks. This, finally, was pretty good. It's about time that I get a nice, high quality juice. It's got a good blueberry taste but is dense. It's flavorful and bold. It's not cut with anything. I could have stretched this out probably 25% just by watering it down and it still would have been good.
In hindsight, this is not my favorite juice. It never was, but I'm summing it all up. Wrapping it up in a little package. It's good, I mean look, I gave it a four out of five. That's good, but this is the 3000th review. This should have been reserved for something epic like a cherry flavored slime with sparkles in it. I would have loved to reserve that for ol' Bernie Mac but we can't wait too long or we're not going to have reviews.
You know us. We don't only review good stuff. We review good stuff poorly and bad stuff well. We make up stories, tall tales, fish tales, and reflect on our past. We bring our family, friends, past relationships, and dreams into our reviews. You get to see inside our deranged minds with a lot of reviews and it gives you an insight into our lives and the people we are. We're three dudes that are friends that are creative idiots that like to drink stuff because it gives us something to talk about.
We talked about what we were going to do and the only thing we could think about was having a pizza party at a place that has been closed for probably twenty years that we each went to when we were eight and playing the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles arcade game and then talking about the advantages of each specific turtle. We're immature kids. We're dumb idiots. We love what we do. Thanks for letting us get to 3000. Tell your friends.
- Website
- http://www.leadingbrandsinc.com/
- Country
- Canada
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Categories
- Juice
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 2/14/2013
- Comments
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Pop Shoppe Groovin' Grape
Back story time. There is a little beverage center here in Buffalo that sells little glass bottles of soda for like $.30 each. It’s not mind blowing, but it’s better than most “normal” pop. They usually came in Pop Shoppe bottles, so we thought that was what it was, until we discovered that it was actually made by a company called College Club from Rochester, NY. They just bought up reusable bottles from old companies who no longer used them. Later on we were on a trip to Canada and I came across some soda that was made by the real Pop Shoppe. In reality it wasn’t much different than the Pop Shoppe stuff, but that means that it was still good. It came in glass bottles so that was a plus, even if it was about 5x more expensive (still only $1.50).
Now you’re caught up to the time when my band was doing a Canadian weekend a little while back and I came across Pop Shoppe skinny cans in a grocery store. I bought a couple of four packs because they were on sale for $1.50 each. Sadly this Groovin’ Grape did not measure up to their bottled sodas. It tastes like they were trying to go for a more actual grape taste than grape soda normally does. The problem is that they didn’t get it quite right. There is no grape juice in this, and while I can taste where they were trying to go, they missed their mark. It’s not horrible, but it’s not great. I don’t know if I would even call it good. It’s just kind of there. I could drink it if it were served to me, but never would I purchase it again myself.
- Website
- http://www.thepopshoppe.com/
- Country
- Canada
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Categories
- Soda Pop
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 2/8/2013
- Comments
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Jones 24c Blueberry Grape
Blueberry grape? Who has heard of such a thing? Blueberry is always paired with pomegranate and these two just shouldn't blend. Jones, the insane Canadians that they are, decided that they can do whatever they want. They put those guys together in one bottle and came up with...wait for it...a strange drink. It smells good and it invites you in. When you drink it, you get some blueberry and some grape juice but there is something else in there, something that I didn't like. I don't want to say bitter but it had a bit of that acai taste to it even though that wasn't an ingredient. I think it's actually the vegetable juice that they use for color that kind of snuck in some flavor. I've had this before with those drinks that are fruit flavored but have a days worth of vegetable intake in them. I'm fine with that, but know that it also delivers this strange aftertaste. If you know this stuff, you will be fine. I am the informer. Snow and I, we are informers.
- Website
- http://www.jonessoda.com
- Country
- Canada
- Sweetener
- Inverted Cane Sugar
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 2/5/2013
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment
Nativa Organics Graepfruit Flavoured Drink
Color me jealous that this is a Canadian drug stores’ house brand. Why can’t Walgreens, CVS or Rite Aid have products this good? I live right near a couple of stores and I would walk to them more often for a drink such as this. It’s simply carbonated mineral water and juice. It’s a mixture of grapefruit, grape, lemon and apple juices, but it really just tastes like someone juiced a grapefruit into some sparkling water. I’m assuming the apple juice is there to sweeten it up a tad, as while it is fairly bitter, it’s not over the top face making bitter. It’s great regardless, and I wish it were available in the States. Looks like I will be stocking up the next time I head up to Canada.
- Website
- http://www1.shoppersdrugmart.ca/en/food-and-home/brands/nativa-organics/collections/nativa-snacks.as
- Country
- Canada
- Sweetener
- No Sugar Added
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 2/3/2013
- Comments
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Kiki Maple Sweet Water Seasons with Blueberry Juice
Kiki darling, I simply could not eat a single pancake more. Why whatever are we to do with all of these buckets of left over maple syrup? Don’t give me that look. I have already eaten 37 of them, and they were all slathered with the delicious syrup you bought, but I simply could not eat another bite. To make matters worse the syrup is in open buckets for some strange reason, and we haven’t a thing to cover them. The rodents that run rampant on our palatial estate will devour it for certain and I can’t bear to see it go to waste in such a manner.
Wait, why don’t we water it down with some…well water and then we can store it in those ridiculous jugs your brother keeps bringing home. I don’t care if it’s buy a jug to take home down at the mead pub, those things are ridiculous, and until now useless. Hmm. Maple water is all fine and dandy, but I think we may have watered it down a bit too much. There is only the faintest tinge of maple in the flavor, but it does give it a nice sweetness. How about we add some of those blueberries you picked, but forgot to put on my pancakes? Oh well that made it a great deal better. It now tastes like a watered down lightly sweetened blueberry juice. I wish the blueberry flavor was a bit stronger, but we did have to spread it though all of these dumb jugs. I have no real complaints about it though. I bet the townfolks would love to try some. Why don’t you go take a few jugs down to them? Oh and Kiki, you’re the best helper monkey ever.
- Website
- http://www.trollbridgecreek.ca/
- Country
- Canada
- Sweetener
- Maple Syrup
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 1/24/2013
- Comments
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Jones Orange & Cream Soda
Would you look at that face? That is the face of a child who just opened her birthday presents and she is not happy with the results. All she wanted was a classic blonde 1972 Fender Telecaster bass and instead what she got was a brand new knock off that looks like a toy. To add insult to injury it was also fretless…ick. Well at least her parents got her a case of orange and cream soda. Orange cream is her favorite soda flavors and only the sweet, sweet flavor of creamsicle soda will right this evil that has been put upon her. What the hell is this? This one is certainly not her parent’s fault. It’s labeled orange and cream, but this doesn’t taste the way she wants it to. Neither the orange, nor the vanilla cream tastes are right, and together they taste nothing like a melted creamsicle. It’s like they took garbage generic orange pop and put in the smallest hint of vanilla that is just not pulling its weight. In fact it tastes more like a generic sweet soda flavor than anything. That’s it. She’s just turned two and this little girl already knows this is the worst birthday that has and will ever exist. She might as well burn the house down.
- Website
- http://www.jonessoda.com
- Country
- Canada
- Sweetener
- Inverted Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Soda Pop
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 1/19/2013
- Comments
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Kiju Organic Iced Tea Mango Passion Mate
I’m going to start a petition to switch the places of black and mate teas. Black tea is everywhere and let’s face it, while it is delectable it is also pretty boring, and far too easy to over sweeten. Mate is a rarity. It’s exotic and you can’t over sweeten it without it losing its special pizzazz. I know that if they were switched for long enough mate would begin to seem commonplace and lose it’s exoticness. I just want this to be for a limited time. I want to go out to eat with my family to some garbage chain restaurant and be able to order a tea and have it be special. In shirt I’m bored with everyday teas.
Kiju is a nice answer to my problem. They make a nice, lightly sweetened mate iced tea. The fruit juice carries most of the flavor, but it has the very specific mate aftertaste. It has a very strong passionfruit taste with some mango around the edges. Did I mention that they use real fruit juices in this? Maybe that is why I like mate so much. If a company cares enough to use it, then they also care enough to use primo ingredients. I’ve never seen a mate sweetened with HFCS. That just doesn’t fly in this world. It’s the world I want to be in, well at least for the time being.
- Website
- http://www.kiju.ca/
- Country
- Canada
- Sweetener
- Organic Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Iced Tea
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 1/14/2013
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment