McDonalds McCafe Chocolate

McDonalds McCafe Chocolate

Do you remember when your parents used to take you to McDonald's and it was an event? I do. I remember the sights and sounds and smells of it. I don't know if it's because we didn't really ever go or because the whole family would get in the car and we'd drive there and go together. Hamburger, cheeseburger, or McNugget. That's all we would get. Their menu now is very elaborate but their staples, albeit terribly unhealthy now that we know what "good food" is, are still there and still guiltily delicious once every six months.

That's about the frequency that I go to McDonald's. Once every six months. Yeah, sometimes I go through the drive through to get a sweet tea, but that's not really considered a trip.

Today my girlfriend and I went to get some nuggets and we decided to try their McCafe shakes. We got a strawberry (review coming soon) and a chocolate (where you are now). It's simple; take a regular McDonald's shake, whip in some whipped cream, add more whipped cream, and put a cherry on top. It tastes more like a frozen yogurt or a half melted ice cream than a shake. McDonald's has this thing where they make the shakes so hard to get through a straw that by the time you are finished with one, your cheeks look like they've been put through as much stress as Louie Armstrong's did in his entire career. It was very creamy and not too sweet and the additional whipped cream made it even smoother once you drank half of it and everything kind of mixed together.

It is a nice alternative to a classic shake and although it could never replace the standard, it isn't that far from it where it feel like cheating, like if you were dating a sister and she had a twin and you kissed on her a little bit. It's close enough that no one can blame you. That's how it works, right?

Website
http://www.mcdonalds.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Milkshake
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on 9/10/2011
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Omega Water Fruit Fusion

Omega Water Fruit Fusion

I find it really strange that in a post-apocalyptic world not many people actually died. I mean maybe 27% of the population is no longer with us, which is tragic, but from all of the comics I've read I would have expected it to be maybe a couple of thousand people left at the most. I guess all of the little amounts of radiation we used in microwaves and cell phones acted like a flu shot of sorts. The strangest thing is that most of the water has been destroyed. One company controls all of the pure water that is left in the world. They are called Omega Water. Sure there are some mutated waters roaming the countryside, but the radiation left them all carbonated and unrefreshing.

To be fair Omega Water isn't pure water like we remember it from the before time. The nuclear war left this water source chock full of water and minerals, including the ever elusive omega-3. I guess their name has two meanings...clever. I personally like this fruit version. It tastes like someone took a pestle and mortar to some children's vitamins and mixed in that fine powder with the water. It tastes like water with faint fruitiness. Fruitiness is now an acceptable word in these end times. Get used to it.

Website
http://www.omegawater.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Sports/Dietary Supplement, Water
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on 9/13/2011
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Omega Water Rainbow 12 Pack- Omega-3 Enriched Flavored Water

Cherry Republic Boom Chugga Lugga Black Cherry Cream Soda

Cherry Republic Boom Chugga Lugga Black Cherry Cream Soda

What a day. Look, I love women as much as the next dude, but my girlfriend...man. She's been hounding me to get a passport for years and I never felt like I needed to. I know, I know, I'm living on a border state and I don't have one. She wants me to go to Ikea and buy shelves and stuff. I don't want any part in that. Yes, I like Swedish meatballs, but I'm not driving an hour and a half to get them. Jay and I used to go to a dance party in Toronto every last Friday of every month and that was awesome. Once they stopped doing that, I didn't have a reason to live...in Canada.

I'm going on a trip and I finally had to get one so I went and some idiot asked if he could use Canadian currency at the post office. What a dumb idiot. So I got my passport all filed, my terrible picture taken, and am now $150 poorer but to celebrate, I grabbed this black cherry cream soda.

I let some people try it and they said that it tastes like Luden's cough drops and I think that Luden's is responsible for changing people's taste of cherries forever. Now, unless you're eating an actual cherry, no one thinks of something as "cherry flavored" they only think of it as "cough drop" flavored, and that's just wrong. This is good, and it's a better black cherry pop than a black cherry cream soda, in my opinion. The cream soda is in there a little bit but the strongest flavor is defiantly the cherry. It's a really nice taste, too. It's a brighter black cherry taste than a plain ol' black cherry pop.

Now in four to six weeks I'll have my passport and will have no excuse why not to go and get shelves and pillow tops and all that crap. Great. Worst $150 I've ever spent.

Website
http://www.cherryrepublic.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Pure Sugar
Categories
Soda Pop
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on 9/13/2011
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Oggu Sparkling Lemon & Lime

Oggu Sparkling Lemon & Lime

Every time I read Oggu I instantly think of the commercials for Boku juice from the 90's with Richard Lewis in them. Those commercials were ridiculous and terrible. He seriously says Boku eight thousand times in each commercial and it's a ridiculous word to be said once, let alone more than twenty times in a minute. Now that I think about it he really didn't do much other than those commercials and terrible stand up. Oh the 90's when the bar was set so low for comedians.

This is a soda, not a juice like Boku. It is also not sub par like Richard Lewis. It is one of the better lemon & lime sodas I've had. It has actual juice in it and it's also not nearly as sweet as most of it's counterparts. That is a great thing about European sodas; they don't feel the need to over-sweeten them. Which I definitely appreciate. This drink is actually good enough that it doesn't need a stand up comic, humorous or not, to sell it. It's flavor sells itself.

Now I just have to remember what show made fun of those commercials. I think it may have been Wayne's World. I'm actually pretty sure of it. If you can confirm that, please do.

Website
http://www.oggu.com/
Country
Netherlands
Sweetener
Sucre De Canne Biologique
Categories
Soda Pop, Sparkling
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on 9/14/2011
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Sapanan Aloe Vera White Grape

Sapanan Aloe Vera White Grape

You know what I love? Discovering new Asian markets. It's a great feeling because that means that a new world is open for me to discover. I went in bright and early and bought everything they had that we hadn't done, including this rocket shaped aloe drink.

So as you can see, the first thing I noticed is the packaging, which is nothing short of awesome. Ergonomically designed and rocket shaped?! Sold, dude. Sold.

Taste-wise, it's just an aloe. It's white grape flavored aloe with giant chunks. The chunks are pretty good because every one you get and chew is like a flavor explosion in your mouth. If you were a glutton and had no self-restraint, you could have a grand finale by drinking the whole container and just going chew crazy.

I liked this drink and any fan of aloe should seek it out.

Website
http://www.sapanan.com
Country
Thailand
Sweetener
Fructose
Categories
Aloe Vera, Chunky
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on 9/14/2011
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Greater Than All Natural Hydration Tropical

Greater Than All Natural Hydration Tropical

Take a really good Gatorade flavor and mix it with coconut water and you get this drink. I'm sure the company probably hates getting compared to Gatorade, but they were on the forefront of sports drinks, and their products are what comes to mind for most people when they think about said category of drinks.

Want to know a secret? I would pick this over a Gatorade any day. First off it's tastes great. Secondly it's all-natural and it's sweetened with beet sugar and not HFCS.

We can only hope that someday sports teams will have giant coolers filled with Greater Than to dump over their coaches when they win the big game. Gatorade has run that monopoly for way too long.

Website
http://www.drinkGT.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Beet Sugar
Categories
Coconut, Sports/Dietary Supplement
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on 9/14/2011
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Greater Than Coconut Water Sports Drink, Tropical, 20-Ounce Bottles (Pack of 12)

Bruce Cost Fresh Ginger Ale Ginger Ale

Bruce Cost Fresh Ginger Ale Ginger Ale

If your grandma wasn't too busy playing nickel slots at the local casino, she would be home making this ginger ale. Bruce Cost knows how to make a high quality drink, complete with chunks of ginger that hit you just right. Reason I'm bringing your grandma into it is because of two reasons:
1. She has a serious gambling problem.
2. She cooks and bakes from the heart using "real" ingredients.

There are four ingredients in this drink, which proves that simplicity often wins the race. Tortoises win races and simplicity wins races. Every time you want to take a sip, you have to swish it around a little to get the ginger sediment a-moving. That makes this a bit of an interactive drink, which makes it fun. If you didn't care about swishing, you would be greeted with probably a pretty average, slightly bitey ginger all but then at the end you would be drinking the powdered equivalent of half a ginger root. If you're into that type of thing, you will love it, but it's not the way that your grandma, who has graduated to the quarter slots since I've started this review, or Bruce Cost intended.

Website
http://www.freshgingerale.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Pure Cane Sugar
Categories
Ginger, Soda Pop
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on 9/15/2011
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Buy Now
Bruce Cost Fresh Ginger Ale Original Ginger - Case of 12

Lolli's Energy Drink Cherry Pop

Lolli's Energy Drink Cherry Pop

This has been sitting on the shelf in my kitchen for months. It looked like a disaster waiting to happen. First off it's an energy drink soda. While the majority of energy drinks are carbonated, I still wouldn't consider them pop for some reason. Secondly it's a cherry energy drink. Most things cherry flavored end up tasting like cough drops or cold medicine. Not a flavor that one looks forward to. To sum this up I was expecting a chemical tasting cough syrup with bubbles in it. Just thinking about that makes my stomach turn.

Lolli's were successful in not achieving that. This is a natural energy drink, so it doesn't contain the chemicals. It has ingredients like ginseng, guarana, niacin and caffeine. As far as the flavor goes there is no medicine to be tasted at all. In face it tastes like grape and apple juice mixed together with a splash of grenadine added for good measure. This was way, way better than I expected. Now someone tell that lady on the label to watch out because she is sitting on a cherry bomb and it's about to go off. I don't want her to have to be rushed to the hospital.

Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Categories
Energy Drink, Soda Pop
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on 9/15/2011
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Lolli's CHERRY POP NATURAL ENERGY DRINK "Pop this cherry; it'll give you a kick!", 12-Ounce Glass Bottle (Pack of 12)

Guayaki Yerba Mate Pure Empower Mint (Mint Tereré)

Guayaki Yerba Mate Pure Empower Mint (Mint Tereré)

Michael loved Saint Patrick’s Day. Actually, let me clarify, he didn’t care anything about Saint Patrick’s Day; he loved the few weeks right before the holiday when McDonalds had Shamrock Shakes. Every year for two weeks he would down as many as he could. When they disappeared for another year it was always a sad occasion. This past year he had kept a quarter of a cup of it in his fridge so he could enjoy it again later. He had planned on holding off for a week or two, but truth be told Michael was a weak willed man. Less than 24 hours had passed since he purchased the frozen beverage before he found himself standing in front of an open fridge with an empty cup and a minty taste in his mouth. It had been glorious, but now the joy was over and he was still thirsty. He had opened the fridge to get some yerba mate, but was distracted by the milkshake. With a shrug Michael grabbed the pitcher of tea and filled up his now empty McDonalds cup. He thought for a second that he should probably rinse it out, but along with being weak willed he was also lazy. When he took a sip he was shocked at how minty the residual shake had made his tea. Normally Michael wasn’t a fan of mint tea. It was always overpowering. This was different though. It was smooth and the yerba mate and the mint blended together nicely. He was so pleased with what he created that he ran out into the living room and had his roommate give it a try. Ron, the roommate, was annoyed that Michael was interrupting his viewing of Desperate Housewives, but he knew the only way to get him to leave was to try it. “It’s good,” Ron said. “It tastes just like the Guayaki Pure Empower Mint that I drink at work all the time.” With that he turned up the volume and Michael went upstairs to his room, leaving the fridge door wide open.

Website
http://www.guayaki.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Evaporated Cane Juice
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on 1/25/2012
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Cintron Peach Mango Green Tea

Cintron Peach Mango Green Tea

Cintron's canned teas and juices are fairly average. They taste like most other tallboy drinks. Those are what I first came across in the stores and I had written them off as just another cheap tea company. Then their glass bottle teas and energy drinks came into my life, and I can tell you for certain that these categories are where the company really shines.

I appreciate an iced tea that you can tell from the first sip that it is made with real brewed tea. Especially green tea. Junk iced green tea has become too commonplace. I really have no need for it in my life. I don't care if it's cheaper. Give me a nice brewed green tea and I will be a happy camper. That is if you give it to me when we're out in the woods and I'm setting up a tent. Well as long as the tent is easy to set up. Then I may be an annoyed camper with happy taste buds. Cintron uses a good quality brewed green tea. In this flavor the peach and mango taste like you're eating the actual fruit. They blend well with the tea. The use of cane sugar is also noticeable in the taste. I only wish their tall boys tastes like this because sometimes I want to be a glutton, but a glutton for high quality tea.

Website
http://www.cintron21.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Cane Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on 9/16/2011
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