3 Dachshunds Root Beer

3 Dachshunds Root Beer

All root beer. It's been a while, friend. So long, in fact, that this root beer took a little turn into "potentially spoiled" territory. I can taste through it so I will be rating it as a non-spoiled bottle of grossness.

This is a fine root beer. If you like root beer, you will like this. If you love root beer, you will think this is "just another" root beer. This is a calmer version of a pretty generic root beer but the cane sugar makes it better because the taste doesn't linger. It's got a medium bite and it's not too dark and not too light. I don't think that this was made "from scratch" but probably from a concentrated syrup. Look, no judgement, it just tastes like it.

A dashshund bit my dog the first time I took her to the dog park so if I had three dashshunds around me, I think I'd be a bit skeptical. I'd probably be on the defense like they're going to attack. If I had three bottles of this root beer around me, two of them would go to waste.

Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Categories
Root Beer, Soda Pop
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on February 29th, 2016
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3 Lemon Sparkling Lemonade

3 Lemon Sparkling Lemonade

MOOOOOOOMMMMMMMM, I want lemonade! Now son, you know we’re in Mexico and you can’t just have everything you want. We’ve been here for a week and all you’ve done is complain about how you want some lemonade. I told you before I looked in every store and nowhere sells it. I also haven’t been able to find any lemons to make you some fresh. They must be out of season or something. But MOOOOOOOOOM I really want it. What about that weird plastic lemon that is in the fridge, couldn’t you make some with that? Well I suppose I could. I don’t want to make it with the tap water though. W have a lot planned today, and I can’t have you running off to the bathroom every five minutes with the runs. The only bottled water I have is carbonated, but if it will get you to shut up let’s give it a try. Oh, now you’ve gone and put far too much of that lemon juice in the sparkling water. We’ll have to fix that by adding some sugar. Unfortunately since this is a rented room, there isn’t any sugar here. Oh wait, I think I have some packets in my purse. Ugh, all I have is artificial sweetener. I guess it’s better than nothing. Here try this. What do you think? Ugh, MOOOOOOOOOOMMM this is GROOOOOOOSSSSSSSS! Nothing about it tastes natural. MOOOOOOOOMMMMM I don’t want lemonade anymore. I want iced tea!!! Well lucky for you they had some down at the market. Let’s take a quick trip there.

So yeah, this tastes exactly like the drink this family made, except it has little dark chunks in it. It’s apparently part of the limejuice, but it just looks like the drink has gone bad. This also says it has no diet aftertaste. Guess what? They are liars.

Country
United States
Sweetener
Aspartame
Categories
Diet, Lemonade, Soda Pop
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on March 25th, 2012
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365 Nutrient Enhanced Water Pink Lemon Aid

365 Nutrient Enhanced Water Pink Lemon Aid

The world of vitamin waters is pretty murky. While there are some really good ones, there are also a lot of bad knock offs. Whole Foods usually knows what's what when it comes to drinks so I figured this one would be a safe bet. What surprised me though was how tart is. Most "lemonade flavored" drinks aren't tart at all. They throw a little lemon flavor in there but don't make your lips pucker at all. This is the closest lemonade flavor vitamin water I’ve ever had, and I love it. It's a delicious light, flavorful, and thirst quenching lemonade.

Website
http://www.wholefoodsmarket.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Cane Sugar
Categories
Lemonade, Sports/Dietary Supplement, Water
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Derek Neuland on April 12th, 2012
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365 Organic Mint Green Tea

365 Organic Mint Green Tea

We in Buffalo do not have a Whole Foods. It has something with us having a rival grocery store and fifty miles and something. Not too far out in Ontario, Canada there is one. Jay, Jay's old lady, and myself went there and did some damage. We bought a lot of things that you can only get at Whole Foods but nothing that you can get only at a Canadian Whole Foods. I think they stock what they stock regardless of country. This 365 seems like it's an "in house" brand. What does it taste like? A little like minty pool water if you ask my coworker, Dan. Do I agree? Mostly. It's a lightly sweetened green tea with little bite and a little, good amount of mint, but somewhere in that mix, it certainly does have a bit of a "minty plastic" taste. I drank the whole thing, so I must have gotten over it, but it was just "alright." Would I drink it again? Eh, probably not. I'm not really moved one way or the other with this guy. I thought it would be good, and it wasn't awful, but it might have stumped my taste buds into making a decision. That could be the worst rating of all; one that is just...there. It's like that cat that just appears when you try to leave for work and you would normally give it a cliché saucer of milk but you've got a big meeting with the Johnson firm today and you can't be late. Those eyes...dead inside, just staring at you. Where did that cat come from? It makes no noise but is just...there...being there.

Website
http://www.wholefoodsmarket.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on December 14th, 2012
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3D Multi Dimensional Beverage Pomegranate

3D Multi Dimensional Beverage Pomegranate

When Dan and I purchased a four pack of this drink the cashier tried to have an intellectual conversation with us. She began by inquiring "Aren't all beverages three dimensional? What makes this drink special?" She was trying so hard to be witty. I humored her by stating that I was only interested in four-dimensional drinks. If a beverage did not span time as well as space, then it need not apply. That resulted in a fairly blank look with a forced smile that accompanied an "Enjoy your day." Oh well I tried. Maybe I should have made a Back to the Future reference. She may have been too young to get it though.

3D lists their three dimensions as super fruits, essential vitamins, and healthy white tea. That's a bit of a stretch as far an dimensions go. I think Stephen Hawking may take issue with it, but who knows maybe that's what all his research has been working towards.

As promised this is a white tea with a nice tart pomegranate flavoring. It had a weird smell when I first opened it, but it tasted pretty great. I don't think it's anything great enough for Marty McFly to go back in time for, but I could see Doc Brown downing a four pack working on the flux capacitor.

Website
http://www.revolutiontea.com/3D/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Pure Cane Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on March 30th, 2011
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Revolution Tea Rev Tea 3d Pomegranate 4 Pack (Economy Case Pack) 12 Oz Can (Pack of 24)

3D Multi Dimensional Beverage Blueberry

3D Multi Dimensional Beverage Blueberry

If it wasn't for stores like TJ Maxx or Marshalls, Jay and I might have not found ourselves loving drinks as much as we do. Some places just don't get some drink companies, and some do. It's unfortunate that every company can't be as widely distributed as Pepsi and Coke. I don't think that the TJX chain of stores cares, as long as they're getting large quantities of stuff cheap, and for that reason, neither do I. I got a four pack of this for $3. Yeah, less than one dollar (USD) per can. In addition, it's pretty good. Not too sweet, rightfully fruity and it actually does justice to blueberries everywhere. I like this because there are antioxidant properties, it's all natural, and they have other flavors.

What I thought was strange about this drink is that it didn't have a scent. I didn't care because it could have gone the other way and smelled grozz.

So, as I sit here writing this review while listening to Sneaker Pimps, I wish that I hadn't just brushed my teeth and that I could have another one. Maybe if I'm good today I'll have another one.

Website
http://www.revolutiontea.com/3D/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Pure Cane Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on April 11th, 2011
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3D Multi Dimensional Beverage Mango

3D Multi Dimensional Beverage Mango

This can tells me to "think pineapple." Don't worry friends. I'm already there. I take a bite and it's so juicy it dribbles down my chin. The acidic levels in it make my tongue tingle a bit, but not to a level that it's uncomfortable. I mean it's my imagination so I cut the thing right off the tree/bush with a machete and use that same tool to slice it up. Man this is some good pineapple. I do have a question though. What does this pineapple have to do with my mango tea? There's no pineapple juice in it. It doesn't even have the faintest taste of pineapple. It tastes like a nice dry/bitter white tea with just the right amount of sweet mango juice mixed in. There's also some cane sugar and agave thrown into the mix. It's not overly sweet. It's just right.

Now if I could only get this pineapple off my mind...

Website
http://www.revolutiontea.com/3D/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Pure Cane Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on June 10th, 2011
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3D Multi Dimensional Beverage Pink Grapefruit

3D Multi Dimensional Beverage Pink Grapefruit

Last night at about 3am someone in the apartment I was staying at started blasting Madonna. Let's get something straight; the first couple of Madonna albums are incredible. They are some of the finest pop records I've ever heard. The thing is that no one wants to hear any music played that loud when all they want to do is sleep. Why do I bring this up? I'm glad you asked. I think that the song Borderline may have been written about this tea (well what she wants this drink to do). Unfortunately it never falls either way. It just keeps riding the fence. It tastes like pink grapefruit, but in kind of a fake way. With each sip I expect it to suddenly turn amazing or terrible, but it's just stuck in the middle. I really want the grapefruit to be stronger then I would be on a "Holiday."

Website
http://www.revolutiontea.com/3D/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Pure Cane Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on June 17th, 2011
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5-Hour Energy Grape

5-Hour Energy Grape

The Fest in Gainesville, FL is one of the best times of year. I would take that weekend over Xmas any time. Even on years such as this where there wasn't very many bands I was interested, I still had an incredible time. It's the "punk rock family reunion." People from all over the country (and world) that I have met from playing in bands are all congregated in a tiny college town. It's really a special thing to be surrounded by so many great people. Fest ended last night, and I was sad to have to leave everyone behind to head out to the next town. I know I'll see everyone again next year, if not sooner, but it's always a bummer.

We had an 11-hour drive to Richmond, VA (we wanted to avoid the south which is over-saturated with touring bands). I was first to bat for driving. I downed this energy shot to help get me where I needed to be. It certainly did its job. We made it well into South Carolina before I felt the need to give up the driver seat.

As far as I know 5-Hour Energy was the first company to get into the energy shot game. I somehow had never tried one until now. It was much better than I expected. It wasn't as harsh and as chemical tasting as other ones I tried. It did have a very distinct grape flavor. That's a rarity in this world. Usually the shots just have a general sweetness to them. I'm still not a big fan of energy shots, but if I have to get one in the future i would pick this over any other ones I've had thus far.

Website
http://www.5hourenergy.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink, Shot
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on October 31st, 2011
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5 Hour Energy Grape, 2-Ounce Bottles (Pack of 12)

5-Hour Energy Pomegranate

5-Hour Energy Pomegranate

Oooh man. Oooh no. Oooh jeez. I need it. I need it so bad. Oooh man. Ooooh God. Ooooh kill me. I need it. Ahhh. Dude, dude, dude, dude...do you have the stuff? You do? Oh, how much do I owe you? A dollar fifty? Oh, man. Hold on. Hey, other dude, do you have a quarter? No, it doesn't need to be a case quarter. Thanks. Here you go, dealer. A dollar fifty. Thanks, dude.

Finally, I've got it. I've needed this. What time is it? Two thirty? I should have had this a half hour ago. I'm feening so hard. Alright, I've got to go in the bathroom to take care of business. Alright, down the hatch. Oh, it smells good. It doesn't smell poisonous. It smells like Flintstone vitamins. Alright, once again, down the hatch. Wooooo! I feel like Ric Flair up in here. I hope no one heard me. That was very loud. It tastes like Flintstone vitamins. I was anticipating this to taste vile but I was wrong. Alright, I'm going to be juiced up for the last...one hour of work. What time is it?! Three thirty? I've been in here doing old wrestler impressions and getting myself juiced up on this energy shot for an hour? Man, I hope that I'm going to have enough energy to run out the door when they fire me.

Website
http://www.5hourenergy.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink, Shot
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on December 7th, 2011
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