989 OnDemand Lemon Lime
Oh these drinks. I like 'em. I really do. They're different but this one I'm going to call their initial foray into this market because for the first time it tasted a little like crushed vitamins. Yes, this drink does in fact contain vitamins so it's not far from the imagination that it would but the previous flavors we reviewed do not have that taste. It doesn't make it undrinkable or even bad, but between the Reb A and the vitamins, it defiantly will turn some people off.
Because I am a great man and because we three Thirsty Dudes care about you, we can only draw such a picture with our carefully written words so I shot you a video of this drink in action to enjoy.
I don't want to hear any grief about it being in portrait versus landscape because we had a tight crop on a bottle, a portrait object by definition.
Back to the drink. It tasted like if you had a lemon lime juice and let a couple Flintstone vitamins marinate in it overnight and then drank it. As a kid I never hated the taste of them so this was fine to me. To Jay, disliker of lemon lime, he wouldn't drink this and it's no wonder why I had it and not him. I don't mind though. I hope they come out with a dozen more flavors so I can open up more of these bottles. Liquid good, people. Secret, liquid goods.
- Website
- http://drink989.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Reb A
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman 2 weeks, 1 day ago
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment
Core Power Natural High Protein Milkshake Vanilla
Okay guys, which one of you pulled this prank on me? You know I take my protein intake seriously. I mean how else am I supposed to get ripped so I can be a superhero look alike on the street for tips? One of you jerks obviously emptied out my protein drink and replaced it with a melted McDonalds milkshake. There is no way that this is not a McDonalds vanilla shake that was left out of the counter, and then put in the fridge to cool it down. It tastes identical to that. So, not only have you denied me my crucial protein, but you’ve also given me the least healthy dessert beverage of all time. Thanks, jerks. Now I’ll never get to look like Thor for $7 in tips an hour. I’m never going to be able to pay off my student loans for medical school.
- Website
- http://www.corepower.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Milkshake, Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper 2 weeks, 2 days ago
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment
Herbal Mist Tea made with Yerba Mate Unsweetened
Dear Herbal Mist,
Do you know what yerba mate is? Are you adding so little that you know you can't taste it but you can still say that your tea is made with it? We've got a guy in this office called Dan and he read this, said Joe Nemechek's name and starting talking about some special NASCAR Language. Something about "Jumpin' Joe," and "Boogity, Boogity."
Look, this is a great iced tea but it's nothing that I haven't gotten at every restaurant I've ever been to. I thought that it would be a chance to really see what your yerba mate tea would have since there are no fruits or sugars getting in the way between me and m' tea. You know what? Since Dan had so much to say about Joe Nemechek, I'm going to let him close out this review but before I do, I would like to say that this is good as far as generic iced tea goes but nothing more. Joe, you may be a fantastic racecar driver but you might want to relay the message to Herbal Mist that you want more yerba mate in your tea. After all, your good name is on it. Alright, here's Dan to say a couple things.
Seriously, Joe? You're better than this. You are THE "Jumpin' Joe," or at least you were. You didn't just only turn left like the other dudes. You hopped and galloped your way around the bends of Daytona like a wild pony. This tea is probably more representative of you now: cruising the neighborhood in a Cadillac, judging your neighbors' unkempt lawns after a Sunday breakfast at Hardee's. Grow a pair, Joe. Get some. Act like it's you and The Intimidator (RIP Dale, Sr.) rounding turn three at Talladega, chasing the checkered. Bumpin' is racin'; Joe needs to get back to Jumpin'.
- Website
- http://herbalmist.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- No Sugar Added
- Categories
- Iced Tea
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman 2 weeks, 2 days ago
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment
NOS Active Fruit Punch
"A Drink For The Tired Athlete" might not be the greatest line, Jim. I know we at NOS pride ourselves on cool packaging and potent energy drinks but the term "tired" is kind of insulting, don't you think? Yes, this is our first foray into the world of hydration but this isn't our first tagline and that one isn't going to push a lot of product. Jim, come on. Look, this isn't our finest drink, I know, but we aren't the type of company to phone it in. We can't be lazy, especially since there are other players already in the market. Let's take a look at what we've got here before we move any further.
We've got an energy drink. We've already proven ourselves a big fish in that market. Let's just move on. We've got a hydration drink. Yes, it's like Gatorade and Powerade but we're mixing other stuff in so it's different. Those other guys don't have caffeine in there and we do so we are going to stand out. The fruit punch flavor is really hard, or so I hear from the flavor scientists at the lab. They did an alright job with this. Right when you take a sip you get a good fruit punch flavor. That lasts about a second. What's strange is that when it sits on your tongue for any longer it starts to get more and more stingy. I don't know where that's coming from to be honest. Neither does the lab. You think they would since they carefully added each ingredient.
You know what, Jim? The more I think about it; maybe it's the lab guys that are the issue. It's easy not to release a bad item into the marketplace. You just don't do it. These guys said it was alright and pushed it out and it's not bad but it's got a certain "really diet energy drink" taste to it. It tastes like a really diet version of two otherwise fine things. That diet branch might have just allowed me to go on a purge of my own because I'm about to trim the fat all over this place, Jim. Get out of my office! I've got some firing to do!
- Website
- http://www.drinknos.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Dextrose
- Categories
- Energy Drink, Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman 2 weeks, 2 days ago
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment
Arizona Lemon Lime Rickey
You've got Grapeheads, Lemonheads, Cherryheads formerly known as the racist Cherry Chan, and Melonheads and Appleheads, which I have never seen and Orangeheads. This drink, as you could probably guess, tasted like Lemonheads if you dipped them in limejuice. It was almost hard to convince myself this wasn't just 7-Up or other comparable lemon-lime drink. It's not bad and it might be more real lemon and lime flavored than "those other guys."
If you like your Sierra Mist, 7-Up, Sprite, and the like, this is a nice, cleaner tallboy of that group that you might like to sink your teeth into. That's figuratively speaking. Please don't bite into this can. Just the thought of you doing that makes me cringe. Who bites cans? What are you? A goat?
- Website
- http://drinkarizona.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- High Fructose Corn Syrup
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman 2 weeks, 2 days ago
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment
Celestial Seasonings Half and Half
Coffee coffee coffee. Enough, alright? We get it. The Keurig is the invention of the decade. I'm not even arguing it. Swarms of people who previously couldn't make a decent cup of coffee to save their lives are now regular baristas. You know, just writing this makes me feel bad for actual baristas. I bet Starbuck's, Tim Horton's, and Dunkin' Donuts sales went down since the invention of that thing. I imagine that if you even breathe the word "Keurig" to someone who works at a coffee place they just shudder and their hand involuntarily turns into a fist.
I'm not taking bread out of anyone's mouth with this guy, though. Half iced tea and half lemonade lightly sweetened. It's lightly sweetened. Did you hear me? Real sugar sugared just enough to still be able to taste the tea and the lemony lemons. It was pretty good. I've had two or three of them and intend on drinking that whole, what do K-Cups come in, 24? 16? Whatever. I'll drink all of them.
Starbuck's et al; you will be fine. Something will come out that says that there is a high content of fecal matter in the cups and everyone will come crawling back for forgiveness. That's when you use your foam skills to spell something lewd to which they deserve.
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman 2 weeks, 2 days ago
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment
Bing Black
I just had a four-day escape to the woods. My friend Kevyn and I rented a cabin in the mountains and had a glorious long weekend of hiking, kayaking and heading to beaver dams at dusk to watch them work on their dams. It was exactly what I needed to just decompress. At one point we took a trip into town to get a couple of provisions and I saw this bottle of Bing. I had had the cherry version before, but blackberry was totally new to me. I was in the market for some juice, and I thought this would do just fine. It wasn’t until after I started drinking it and started reading the packaging did I realize that it was actually a natural energy drink. It took me reading it to realize it was an energy drink, as it tasted nothing like one. I believe that is because it doesn’t have taurine or any other chemicals in it to give you a boost. It’s all B vitamins, caffeine, ginko biloba and ginseng. It really just tastes like sparkling juice.
Okay, to be fair the sugar in it makes it taste more like a soda than sparkling juice, even though there are only 8g of sugar in this can. It’s a mixture of blackberry and cherry juice, and each sip is heavier on one over the other. It’s a crapshoot for which one you’re gonna get, but both are great, so it doesn’t matter.
Unfortunately they felt the need to add sucralose right at the end of the ingredient list. Even though there is such low amounts you can still taste it a bit, and it distracts you from the flavor. Other than that this is great, and if you want a natural energy drink this is the way to go.
- Website
- http://www.getbinged.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Energy Drink, Juice, Sparkling
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper 2 weeks, 3 days ago
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment
Xyience Xenergy Grape
As far as energy drinks go, this is good. As far as drinks go, this isn't fantastic. I don't really taste actual grape and I get a whole gallon of hurt. This drink hurts to drink. It tastes like I was drinking juice with needles in it. It felt prickely. What makes drinks sharp like this? Is it the sweetener? Is it something else? It's almost the same sting as you get when you drink Lipton Brisk. Oh, old Hug drinks. Those suckers stung.
Flavor town was fine. It's generically fruity more than it is explicitly grape. It's not offensive like when people stare at you because you've got tattoos or piercings. It's just not...quite...grape. Yes, I will hold it against them because they said it tasted like grape and it doesn't. Don't lie to me, cage fighters. You can beat me up fair and square but you can't feed me this and tell me it's grape. You should also know that I took many years of Tae Kwon Do so you might get hit by my delicate fist once or twice before you give me a bitchin' roundhouse.
- Website
- http://www.xyience.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucralose
- Categories
- Energy Drink
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman 2 weeks, 5 days ago
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment
5-Hour Energy Pink Lemonade
I had been seeking this energy shot out for a while but it kept eluding me. Or I would find it when I didn't want an energy shot or didn't have money on me. This went on for months until I had to go to a family function on barely any sleep. My grandparents were being awarded by the city of Tonawanda for doing awesome stuff for the youth (they helped build a skate park among other things). Knowing that I was going to have to talk to family and friends of the family, I wanted to be semi-coherent so I stopped by a drug store to wake myself up. Not wanting to carry around an open can of Monster (seriously, more energy drinks need to come in resealable bottles), I went to the front counter where they keep the energy shots so 14 year old kids don't steal them all. Low and behold, the pink lemonade shot was there!
Now in the past, energy shots are usually borderline undrinkable. This was not the case at all this time. It tasted like pink lemonade should. Sweet, a little sour, and overall delicious. My only complaint was I only got a couple sips of the taste. They should water it down and make a larger drink out of this because it would be awesome and I would drink it much more than I should.
- Website
- http://www.5hourenergy.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucralose
- Categories
- Diet, Energy Drink, Lemonade
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Derek Neuland 2 weeks, 5 days ago
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment
Herbal Mist Tea made with Yerba Mate Mango
Finally! After all these herbal mists, we finally found one that tastes like actual yerba mate. Yes, it's only for a limited time but for the limited time, it's great. After this limited time offer, you are given a nicely sweetened mango tea. Xylitol, a natural sweetener, and all its Stevia brethren have been in seemingly everything and it's nice to see this used well. It's not too sweet and doesn't taste fake. It has a good mango taste to boot so this whole bottle has got winning all over it.
If I could have a lot of this, it would be great. I don't love mangos anywhere near as much as Jay does but I think that even him, ever-incrementing hater of all things Stevia, would enjoy this drink.
- Website
- http://herbalmist.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Xylitol
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman 2 weeks, 6 days ago
- Comments
- View and Leave A Comment