Allen's Tropical Grove Guava

Allen's Tropical Grove Guava

The ingredients: water, sugar, juice. Couldn't they have reversed the sugar to juice ratio? I bet this would have been way, way better if they had. It has 15% juice. So that means that more than 15% of this drink is sugar. I probably shouldn't think about that. It does actually have a guava taste, but I can't help but thinking about the insane amount of sugar that's in it, and I can't really get over that. I paid $1 for this, so I didn't really expect it to be much better, but a man can dream.

Country
Canada
Sweetener
Liquid Invert Sugar
Categories
Juice
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on December 20th, 2010
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Allen's 25% Real Guava Juice Case Pack 12

Allen's Tropical Grove Peach

Allen's Tropical Grove Peach

I was shocked by how much this juice smelled like actual peaches. Our experiences with the other Tropical Grove juices haven't been the best. This does have more sugar than juice, but it still tastes like peaches. Unfortunately, the peaches taste like they weren't ripe when they were juiced. Couldn't you have left them on the tree just a little bit longer? I understand that time is a factor in turning a profit, but a couple of days longer and it seems like this juice could have been something pretty good, instead of being on the lower side of mediocre.

Country
Canada
Sweetener
Liquid Invert Sugar
Categories
Juice
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on December 29th, 2010
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Allen's 25% Peach Cocktail Case Pack 12

Sol Mate Lemon Lime

Sol Mate Lemon Lime

I could definitely see this as being an acquired taste. On first sip I thought it was pretty terrible, but the further I got into the bottle the more I thought it wasn't so bad. If this was something that was around all the time, I could really see after drinking it here and there for a while, really starting to love it.
It's mate, so it has a ton of caffeine in it (which I need to stay awake tonight). It also gives it a strong bitter taste. I think the lemon lime flavor takes away from the mate flavor. I'm expecting to like the original one more.

Country
Canada
Sweetener
Organic Cane Sugar
Categories
Energy Drink, Iced Tea, Soda Pop, Sparkling
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on December 31st, 2010
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Sol-Mate Lemon-Lime - 24/10 oz

Nestle Coffee Crisp

Nestle Coffee Crisp

Living on the border of Canada has its advantages. One of them is the awesomeness that is Canadian candy. Seriously, they put the U.S. to shame. When I was in high school/college I knew a ton of people that would take trips up to the Great White North to stock up on confectionery supplies, as well as a lower drinking age and strip clubs. Nowadays there are a ton of convenient stores and gas stations started carrying one of those three.

Even though (for the millionth time) I'm not a big coffee fan, I do enjoy Coffee Crisp. This evening some friends and I went up to Canada to eat at Licks Home Burgers. They seriously have some of the best veggie burgers and onion rings I've ever tasted. We stopped at a corner store to check out the beverage scene up there, and my eyes got pretty huge when I saw this in the cooler. It tastes pretty much like you would expect; chocolate milk with a hint of coffee. It's smooth, but it somehow leaves the impression of the grittiness of the candy bar. Okay it tastes like a liquefied candy bar. Fans of Canadian candy and chocolate milk take note.

Website
http://www.nestleusa.com
Country
Canada
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Coffee, Milk
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on January 20th, 2011
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Sol Mate Original

Sol Mate Original

This is the strongest tasting mate that I have ever had. It's just sparkling water, mate and cane sugar. The first sip is so incredibly bitter. I almost considered not finishing it, but I'm glad I did. The second sip, not nearly as bad. By the fourth or fifth I was really enjoying drinking this. When I expected the bitterness it stopped being a problem, and it became something to look forward to.

Country
Canada
Sweetener
Organic Cane Sugar
Categories
Energy Drink, Iced Tea, Soda Pop, Sparkling
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on January 21st, 2011
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Slow Cow

Slow Cow

When we received samples of this, we got a whole case. We wagered guess of how many cans we would have to drink before we fell into a coma of epic proportions. Soap Operas would have nothing on us.

I believe this is the first diet relaxation drink we've reviewed. The can boasts "Zero Calories." At first glance of the ingredient list I thought it didn't have any sweeteners in it at all, artificial or not. I made mention of it to my girlfriend, and started reading off the ingredients that are in it. Right at the bottom I almost missed it again, but there was that sneaky devil sucralose. I knew it had to be there somewhere, as the drink has a definite diet taste to it. It almost tastes like an overly diet Red Bull. You know that weird Smarties flavor.

For some reason I really wanted this to be blue. Cows aren't blue. Milk isn't blue. Yet, this should be blue in my mind. It is clear. It will make you mellow and sleepy though. Oh, and if anyone shaves our beards while we're in our comas, we're coming to get you once we wake up. If we happen to die, be prepared to be haunted.

Website
http://www.slowcowdrink.com/
Country
Canada
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Relaxation
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on February 10th, 2011
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SLOW COW RELAXATION DRINK, (PACK OF 4 CANS) "DO NOT FREEZE"

Cadbury Crispy Crunch

Cadbury Crispy Crunch

I'm American. I am probably a poor American for the following reasons:
1. I do not own a Bruce Springsteen record. Not my fault. I bought one and it was out of stock.
2. I do not drive a truck.
3. I do not drive an American car, although Mazda is partially owned by Ford so that's kind of close.
4. I am not a Christian, nor religious at all.
5. I am skinny.

I live on the border of the US and Canada. No, really. From where I am sitting, I can see Canada with ease. For this reason, I know what Coffee Crisp and Smarties are. I also know what a Crispy Crunch is. This does taste like a Crispy Crunch, but half of the fun is the crunch that you get from the candy bar itself. Also, who doesn't love to eat something like a Kit Kat over a nice, dark wood desk, love it, then look down and feel accomplished at the mess you've made. Just brush it on the floor. "The help" comes at night, like ninjas with mops. This isn't bad. It's beyond horrific for you, but it's good. It's just lacking what makes the candy bar good.

Website
http://www.cadbury.co.uk/
Country
Canada
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Milkshake
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on March 3rd, 2011
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Kiri Spruce Beer

Kiri Spruce Beer

Dad, I don't want to go camping. I love spending time with you, I really do, but the thought of getting all muddy does not thrill me. Oh, I won't get muddy? Dude...sorry, Dad, it's been raining for like 3 days. They don't make boots waterproof enough to keep that much out of my feet. Not to mention, when you have a bonfire, you smell like it for days irregardless of how many showers you take. Sure "irregardless" is a word. I just used it in a sentence. It's always cold and there are so many mosquitoes that, as an adult, I feel that I am rightfully scared of contracting malaria. Can't we just stay home and drink that case of Kiri Spruce Beer? It tastes like spicy trees. Seriously, it tastes like if you bottled a forest and spiced it up a bit. I'm not trying to cop out here, but it really sounds like a miserable time. Look, I'll go, but I want to listen to my tapes in the car. I just got this fresh new Tony! Toni! Toné! album from The Wall that I really want to listen to. If we can listen to that, drink a refreshing, conifer flavored drink in the truck, and stop at a Denny's on the way home, I'll go. Sweet, see you in the truck!

Website
http://www.kiri.com/en/
Country
Canada
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Soda Pop
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on March 24th, 2011
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Crush Soda Mousse Cream Soda

Crush Soda Mousse Cream Soda

Growing up in Buffalo, going to Canada was no big deal at all. It was closer than most suburbs and all you needed was a photo ID to get in the country. On one of my first trips there, I came across a bottle of pink cream soda. I love cream soda, so it really intrigued me. After the first sip, I fell in love immediately. It became a staple for every trip to Canada after that (as well as 'all dressed' flavored chips and Coffee Crisp (before I was vegan)).

It had been far too long since I had a bottle of soda mousse. It is impossible to find in the states, and Portland is not conveniently located 20 minutes from the border. Two weeks ago as I was planning to come to the Chicago Zine Fest, my friend Amy Leigh from Toronto asked if I wanted her to bring me anything from the Great White North. I took her up on the offer and requested a bag of all dressed chips and a bottle of soda mousse. Not only did she deliver on her offer, she brought two of each! I couldn't dream up a better friend.

The taste is just as I remembered it, truly amazing. It's not the creamiest cream soda, but it's really smooth and delicious. My mind is trying to play tricks on me and think that it has a hint of strawberry flavor, but I think it's just due to the pink color. Maybe it's a good thing that I can't buy this at any store, because it's a wonderful treat every few years.

Website
http://www.crushsoda.com
Country
Canada
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Soda Pop
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Derek Neuland on March 28th, 2011
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Under Way Acai and Pomegranate

Under Way Acai and Pomegranate

Ladies and gentlemen I'd like to be the first to thank you for coming to this ceremony and for purchasing this bottle of Under Way. It brings joy to my heart that all of you purchased this beverage in order to help out with breast cancer awareness. As you know breast cancer is a horrible thing, but by purchasing this drink you are.....wait....what? Under Way has nothing to do with awareness? Why on Earth did they use that pink color for the bottle then? Don't they know that that specific pink is reserved for breast cancer and penicillin? Did they want people to think of antibiotics when they drink this? Oh.....it's a Canadian company. I guess that makes sense.

Even though it's packaging is completely misleading in my world, the drink itself is fairly decent. The diet taste is only slight. The acai and pomegranate flavors overpower it nicely. I don't know how a Canadian drink made it's way down to a U.S. discount store, but it did, and I drank it, and I enjoyed it.

Country
Canada
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Juice, Sports/Dietary Supplement
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on April 7th, 2011
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underWAY Acai-Pomegranate Appetite Suppressant Beverage, 16-Fluid Ounces, 1 Bottle (Pack of 24)
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