Apple (18 reviews)

Chaparritas Apple

Chaparritas Apple

Apple juice: One of the hardest things to review. Why? It really tastes so similar it's like splitting hairs. It’s the same with orange juice. It's hard. Also, before you ask, the answer is "Yes." Yes, we know the difference between "hard work" and "hard to review juice." We're aware of our place in this world, alright?

This is apple juice. The difference is that this has sugar in it. Most apple juices are straight apple juice. I do not know why Chaparritas decided to add sugar and honestly, it doesn't change the taste at all. If they would have used a different sweetener like corn syrup it probably would have made it strange and thick but since they used natural, cane sugar, it probably closely mimics that of the sugar that comes from apples.

Sugar? No sugar? At the end of the day you've got a nice, petite glass of apple juice.

Website
http://www.chaparritas.com/
Country
Mexico
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Categories
Juice
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on October 31st, 2014
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Chaparritas Apple Drink, 8.45 Ounce (Pack of 24)

Tango Apple

Tango Apple

It’s not like I’m ever going to turn down an apple when it’s offered to me. You’re reading the words of a man who has eaten apples until he was physically sick on several occasions, solely because he was hanging out in an apple orchard. I have no self control. The thing is that if the choice is given between a green, red or yellow apple, green is going to win out every time. It’s a shame that when most companies make products that they deem to be green apple flavored they taste like sour, artificial garbage. Tango on the other hand does things right, but I’m getting ahead of myself. Let’s go back in time to my first encounter with this wonderful soda.

The year was 2007 and I was touring Europe for the first time. We had just taken a ferry from France to England and we had played a show in Brighton. That night we stayed at some abandoned office building that some kids, and I mean a lot of kids, were squatting. The building was pretty run down and only a couple parts of it had weird makeshift electricity that I believe they were stealing from an adjacent building. The kids were nice enough and I accompanied them to a store so they could pick up some beer. As a non-drinker I was looking for something more kid friendly. I had still not given up my search for root beer or iced tea at this point, and my hopes were high when we entered the corner store. Of course there was no sign of what I was looking for, and since money was extremely tight, I bought a giant bottle of Tango, because it was under a pound and it would last me all night. I took some swigs from the bottle as we walked back to our home for the night and a wonderfully sweet, fruity flavor washed over my tongue. Over the next two hours I downed that whole bottle, and felt like garbage for it. I didn’t regret it though as it was delicious. The soda was made with real apple juice and it tasted like actual fruit and not sour chemicals. It was like taking a teaspoon of sugar in your mouth and biting into a nice crisp Granny Smith. The night went long, and I was beverageless for most of it. I ended up hanging out in the building’s break room, which was now the current denizen’s kitchen most of the night. I always seem to end up hanging out in the kitchen of a party for some reason. The following morning I woke up and my saliva glands were just secreting apple flavor, which was fairly gross and concerning. I drank many more bottles of Tango on that trip, and I enjoyed every one, especially when I drank them in moderation and they weren’t altering my chemical make up.

Not only is Tango a fine beverage, but it’s also the best tasting apple soda with added sugar that I have ever drunk.

Website
http://www.facebook.com/youvebeentangoed
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Soda Pop
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on May 9th, 2014
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Compal Fresh Apple

Compal Fresh Apple

Apple juice. It's apple juice. It's good, too. It's good apple juice. What I'm drinking is good apple juice. No sugar. All apples. Just apple juice.

Website
http://www.compal.pt/
Country
Portugal
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Juice
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on April 11th, 2014
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Freez Apple

Freez Apple

This is one of those drinks that you have to check and then check again to make sure that they are in fact not alcoholic. The look of the bottle just screams, “This will get you drunk without tasting like alcohol!” If it were something along the lines of a Mike’s Hard something or other I would not be surprised. After checking it for a third time I am finally convinced that this is “safe,” so I’m ready to dive in.

My first thought is that this is not nearly as sweet as I anticipated. Actually my first thought was thank god I didn’t miss something and this isn’t alcoholic, but the sweetness thing crept into my mind directly after. I had expected it to be ridiculously sweet like other apple sodas I’ve tried that leave your salivary glands seeping sweet apple flavor for hours.

I then thought, well this actually kind of tastes like apples and not artificial garbage. 20% apple juice will do that to a soda. This is a little bit of okay in a bottle that I had severe doubts about. I would happily drink this again and in a blind taste test of apple sodas it might not be the ultimate winner, but it would be in the upper echelon.

I still believe that you could give a bunch of these to high school kids and tell them they were alcoholic and watch as they got progressively drunker as they drank them. Actually, I kind of what to do exactly that right now. Kids can be so dumb when they want to seem cool. I cant wait to mess with Mike’s kid when he’s a teenager.

Country
Lebanon
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Soda Pop
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on March 18th, 2014
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Robinson's Fruit Shoot Apple

Robinson's Fruit Shoot Apple

Oh look, a lantern. It would be awesome if this was a...woah, it is a magic lantern. What's up, genie? Herb? Your name is Herb? Cool. I thought it would be something more, I don't know, majestic, but Herb is fine. Oh, oh, really? I get three wishes? This is awesome. I wish it were brighter in here so I could get around. I don't know how I got to this section of the castle. I was just checking my text messages and emails and walking aimlessly and ended up here. Oh...what the...that was a wish? I guess I did say, "I wish it was brighter." That one is on me, herb.

You know what? I'm thirsty. Could I have something to drink? No, what kind of a genie, oh, I get it. "I wish I could get something to drink. Woah. Do you have unlimited glitter? That's pretty cool. You'd be a hit in an art school. People would lay down some lines of glue and then all the kids would say, "I wish we had glitter!" and you would do your magic and art would happen.

Oh, you know what? I don't drink alcohol. Could I swap this with a non-alcoholic drink? What? I have to wish it? I have to say, "I wish this was non-alcoholic" for you to do it. That's...no...wait...come on! I just blew three wishes on light and one drink that I didn't want and one that I did want? This better be one heck of a drink, Herb. Ugh, what is this? You just took the alcohol out and left whatever else was in there? This is really bad. It's got a split second of candy sour apple and then it's just overwhelmingly terrible almost alcoholic tasting. It's kind of bitter like they might have used bad apples. Herb. Did you poison me? You didn't? Man, I wish you did. Wait...no!!!! Oh, I wasted my wishes. Now I'm kind of glad I wasted those because I would have just killed myself. Suicide by genie. That would be something. Thanks, Herb. Can you tell me how to get out of this castle? No? Alright, Herb. Thanks, I guess.

Website
http://www.fruitshootusa.com/
Country
Ireland
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Juice
Rating
1/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on September 5th, 2013
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Sneaky Pete's Oat Beverage Apple

Sneaky Pete's Oat Beverage Apple

When I was in college, pretty exclusively now that I think about it, I ate a lot of oatmeal. It was cheap. Yes I ate my fair amount of ramen but that comes with the territory. Had I known that ten years later I would be drinking oats, I would tell you that would be disgusting. Was ignorant, uneducated, me right? Future, smart, attractive me says, "Eh, 70%."

What you've got is an artificially sweetened apple juice that tastes more like a weak cider than an apple juice which actually give it a better rating that if it were just apple juice flavored apple juice. Where did that extra 30% go? Well it's simple. If you artificially flavored plastic beads to taste like artificially sweetened, light apple cider, you would have it. I can't pinpoint what makes that true but it is as true as non-provable stats can be.

You were close Sneaky Pete, but you left the bottle in the sun too long and let it infuse itself into your drink.

Website
http://www.sneakypetesbeverage.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Erythritol
Categories
Diet, Juice, Other/Weird
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on August 8th, 2013
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Sneaky Pete's Oatstanding Beverage, Apples Away, 12 Ounce (Pack of 12)

Welch's 100% Juice Apple

Welch's 100% Juice Apple

Mike is always complaining about reviewing apple juice. You see unless it’s the one out of a thousand times that it’s something out of the ordinary and exception, or complete garbage, all apple juices pretty much taste the same. I find that strange because there are so many different types of apples out there with such an array of flavors, that I can’t imagine every company uses the same type. I would expect each company to have their slightly unique version of apple juice, yet the all taste the same. Perhaps the problem is that they all mix the various apple types and the result is the standard. I guess I’m okay with that. There are types of apples that I’m not really a fan of, but I can never remember which is which. This way I don’t have to worry about buying a juice that tastes like the “bad apples.”

Welch’s you’ve done nothing new, or spectacular, here, but that’s fine. You’ve perpetuated the standard and I enjoyed it. I just don’t understand why you ship in your apple juice concentrate from China, Chile and Argentina when your company is based out of the North East which is ripe with apple orchards.

Website
http://www.welchs.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Juice
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on July 27th, 2012
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Welch's 100% Apple Juice , 11.5-Ounce Cans (Pack of 24)

Kristall Swedish Apple

Kristall Swedish Apple

Whenever I drink one of these sodas I always think of rap/hip hop. I know that the champagne spells their name differently, but I still always think of it. This also led me to think that there better be a hip hop song that has the line, “Bottles poppin. Booties droppin.” Thanks to a quick Google search I know that the hip-hop community has not let me down. Like they ever would?

You know who else would never let me down? Kristall. Sparkling water, apple juice and sugar make for one great combo, that’s a no brainer. Kristall takes things in a slightly different direction by using a different type of apple. I don’t know what type of apples are typically used to make apple juice, but there is certainly some standard. Kristall doesn’t use that type. I wish I were more of an apple connoisseur so that I could tell you specifically what it is, but my palate is not that refined. I can tell you that it is a dryer apple, and the flavor of the skin is still intact in this drink.

Get yourself a nice “dry” apple and a bottle of sweetened sparkling water. Take a nice huge bite of the apple, chew it for a second and then let your mouth over run with the water. That will give you a homemade version of this beverage and a big wet, sticky mess. Now clean up that mess and yourself, we’re in the middle of the grocery store.

Website
http://www.kristallbeverage.com
Country
Sweden
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Categories
Juice, Soda Pop, Sparkling
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on April 27th, 2012
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Barrilitos Apple

Barrilitos Apple

Dear Mexico,

It's nice to know that you and I have finally met. I have wanted to visit you for a long time. I would say that as long as I've known that tacos come from you I have wanted to visit your arid region. I don't mean that in a sexual way, and if this pen were erasable, I would have taken care of that potential double entendre. Since it is essentially written in stone, you're going to have to live with it knowing that I did not mean it.

Moving on, your locale was wonderful. If I was in the market for a 70's Volkswagen Beetle or a 90's Jeep Wrangler, I know that if I can't find one in these United States, I can always go to your area and find a trillion. I did not have a lot of time to spend on your shores and for that reason, I missed out on picking up some of your homegrown Barrilitos. You keep things simple there. Here in the states there is all sorts of marinating, saturating, and other food and drink related activities that happen that take up all our free time. You make a product like Barrilitos and take a siesta. I am envious of your "laid back" lifestyle. This drink just tastes like carbonated apple juice. Apple juice is great. Pop is great. Putting them both together is great. Tacos are the best food ever and everything can basically be taken out of can and dumped onto a tortilla; that is if you are alright with everything being cold.

In closing. I already miss you. I didn't know it got as cold as it did when we were together, but that's because I am geographically retarded and don't know what happens south of Buffalo in terms of weather patterns and no, I don't mean South Buffalo. I know what happens there and it's nothing good, I can assure you that. I hope you are having a great time without me and I know one day we will be together drinking nice glass bottles of Coke and Barrilitos.

Sincerely,
Mike Literman

Website
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Barrilitos/130267336986052
Country
Mexico
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Soda Pop
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on January 6th, 2012
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Barrilitos Apple, 24-Ounce PET Bottles (Pack of 12)

Juicy Juice Sparkling Apple

Juicy Juice Sparkling Apple

My grandparents had a small apple orchard in their back yard. I loved apples. When I was a kid they were my absolute favorite. As a result whenever I was visiting them and apples were ripe I would gather up as many as I could and devour apple and apple until I got sick. I was a dumb kid. I liked the game of seeing how many I could eat. The best part about their orchard was that they were all green and yellow apples. As much as I love apples I would pick one of those over any red apple any day. I tip my hat to Juicy Juice for going the uncommon route and using green apples in their sparkling juice. This could have turned out just like any other sparkling apple juice, but they mixed things up a bit and I thank them for that.

There is something strange about carbonating green apples. They almost get a sour apple candy taste to them. At first sip I was disappointed because I thought it was sour apple candy flavored. Then I remembered it was juicy juice and they don't add sugar. After a couple of more sips I was completely on board. It is slightly sour, but then again so are green apples. The aftertaste specifically really tastes like you just at an apple. So far, this is my favorite in this line.

Website
http://www.juicyjuice.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Juice, Sparkling
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on November 20th, 2011
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Nestle Juicy Juice, Sparkling Apple, 8.4-Ounce Cans (Pack of 24)
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