Berry (21 reviews)

Kra Sports Drink Berry

Kra Sports Drink Berry

You will not believe the amounts of sports I have just done. I hit all the field goals, shot all the home runs, kicked all the goals, and slammed all the points. I did it all, and boy am I dehydrated now. It’s lucky for me I have this bottle of Kra to get me back to normal. It’s a slightly salty (in the best way) sports drink with actual juice in it. This is the third flavor of Kra I’ve tried and I have been on board with all of them. They are tasty and hydrate me when I need them to. You know, like right now after all those sports I just did. I’m exhausted and dripping with sweat. I could literally wring my shirt out and get a substantial amount of fluid from it. This drink that tastes like a salty blueberry apple juice that is slightly watered down with fill me with hydration the way normal sports drinks never could. When that happens I will be ready for more sports! Huh? What do you mean I haven’t been playing sports? I mean I’m soaked and tired. Oh, I’ve just been printing shirts in my basement all day in the extreme heat and humidity, standing next to a 1,100 degree dryer and I’m now delirious? Well, Kra helps with that too then!

Website
http://https://www.drinkkra.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Cane Sugar
Categories
Sports/Dietary Supplement
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on July 14th, 2017
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La Croix Sparkling Water Berry

La Croix Sparkling Water Berry

If I were to substitute all of the cans of seltzer water that I drink with La Croix brand, I would have to be a rich man. Perhaps that is just because the amount I drink is so obscene, but these cans are at least double the price of the 12-packs of Polar I normally purchase. Do you know what though? It’s totally worth it. I love Polar, but La Croix put out the most flavorful seltzers I have ever tried. They have figured out a way for high quality fruit flavors to shine though without any sweeteners, which makes it zero calories. You could drink case after case of this stuff and not feel terrible about yourself. I bet you would have the most righteous burps too.

There is no mistaking this, it is most certainly a sparkling berry beverage. As long as you are not some sort of savage that needs your drinks to be more sugar than liquid, it is incredibly enjoyable.

Website
http://www.lacroixwater.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Sparkling, Water
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on January 12th, 2017
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Celsius Flo-Fusion Berry

Celsius Flo-Fusion Berry

In the future when the whole world is filled with fat slobs, the skinny man, with all of their nimble ways, will be king. Since the worlds food supply will be nothing but snack foods and items of the deep fried variety staying slim will be a challenge. In fact many will result to illegal methods to keep their figure. The way these are packaged makes me think they are some sort of futuristic street drug. People meet up on shady street corners in the dead of night and deals are made for the sweet (actually kind of weirdly bitter) powder that will give them an edge over the overweight set.

These actually taste completely artificial like I would imagine a black market futuristic weight loss drug would. With both sucralose and erythritol in the mix making up what I can only assume is a majority of the powder the natural wild berry flavor never stood a chance. This one is much better than the orange version, but it still leaves something to be desired, mainly not an overwhelming taste of fake sugar.

Now how much do you think these things will sell for when the fatpocolypse hits? Should I stock up now?

Website
http://www.celsius.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink, Sports/Dietary Supplement
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on May 27th, 2015
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Celsius "Flo Fusion" Berry On-the-Go with 14 Count Packets, 3.08 Ounces

Eternal Energy 10 Hour Time Release Berry

Eternal Energy 10 Hour Time Release Berry

I’m just going to go ahead and say what I can only assume everyone is thinking; 10 hours is one heck of a long time. That’s longer than a typical work day. It’s so long that you have to plan out when you are going to drink this shot, or else you can say goodbye to you regularly scheduled sleep. Personally, if I drink any sort of energy drink past 5 or 6pm I’m not falling asleep until somewhere in the range of 3-5 in the morning. I’m an extreme case because I apparently have sensitivity to uppers. Seriously though, if you’re driving late at night and you just need a push to make it through, this is probably not the product for you. The only uses I can think for this would be if you wanted to stay up all night having adventures, or if you were looking for a push to help you through the work day. Okay, I’m an idiot and didn’t reads the blub on the bottle until now, and this was in fact developed to help people get through a full work day. This whole thing makes sense now. People now have the ability to down one shot instead of drinking more than a handful of overly sugared energy drinks to push them through the work they hate.

This certainly has the same concentrated chemical taste that all energy shots seem to have. No one said the basis of energy tasted good. Eternal Energy did do a good job covering it up with a berry flavor and a whole mess of fake sugar, actually the fake sugar may have made it worse, but so long empty calories. As far as I can remember I’ve never enjoyed the taste of an energy shot, but at lease this one is somewhat palatable. Oh yeah, I also literally climbed a mountain after I drank this, and even though my body was aching an extreme amount I was still focused and the energy this shot gave me kept me moving, so I’ll say it works just fine.

Website
http://www.eternalenergyshot.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Energy Drink, Shot
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on October 1st, 2014
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Eternal Energy 10 Hour Timed Release Energy Shot...See discounts below for 3-5 and 8 Bottle POWER Packs.

TEAse Berry

TEAse Berry

Rumors have been circulating about where I have been. People have said that I was in China selling cows. I have heard that I had left Thirsty Dudes in order to work full time to fulfill my dream of becoming a professional competitive pie eater. I have also heard that I was being groomed to become the newest host of the late night television show "Mike Night with Mike." I can say, for sure, that these are all false.

Regardless of what I was doing, which you don't care about anyway, let's be honest, I'm back in full effect with this, a thrilling review of a drink that is supposed to get my metabolism boosted. Look, I'm thirty-one years old and don't have the metabolism that I had when I was a terribly haired, equally terribly dressed high school student. That being said, I do not believe that this is going to give me the endurance that would allow me to do things like get three hours of sleep and just rage all day. As a terribly, immature adult, this does quench my thirst because it is good. It doesn't have a strong tea taste. Light tea taste. Not strong. Strong berry taste. According to the pictures on the bottle, there are cherries (which I can taste), blueberries (which I cannot taste), strawberries (which I might be able to taste) and raspberries (which I also might be able to taste). That's a good fifty percent tasty fruit to tasteless fruit. I suppose it's a fair ratio.

Hey, regardless of what seedy or otherwise not terribly entertaining things I've been up to these past five days, I'm back and this review proves it. I'm off to continue my new career of playing as a rodeo clown but you don't care about that.

Website
http://www.coldstarinc.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Evaporated Cane Juice
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on December 16th, 2013
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Runa Clean Energy Berry

Runa Clean Energy Berry

Can we all agree that your everyday energy drinks make you feel like garbage in the aftermath? There is too much sugar and too many weird chemicals in them, and as a result you crash and you either need to drink another one like a junky, or you deal with the “shakes,” or should I call them anti-shakes? For me at least they are a “break glass in case of emergency” type item, or at least they were until we started up Thirsty Dudes. Now I have a civic duty to feel like moose trampled me.

The main, and classic alternative to energy drinks is to drink coffee. That is also not for me. I can enjoy it if there are tons of chocolate and sugar in the mix, but I just do not like regular coffee. Again, I really don’t need all that sugar into my life either.

Runa is giving people another option. It is a sparkling juice beverage that uses the Amazon guayusa as a delivery method for natural caffeine and polyphenols. Each 8.4oz can contains 120mg of caffeine, which is more than in a regular cup of coffee. We’re talking more energy per square inch here people. On top of that it actually tastes great. It has a never rainforest berry flavor going on. You know if acai actually tasted the way you wanted it too, and wasn’t so intense.

Sure these cans cost more than a gas station coffee, but they are cheaper than you would pay for a coffee shop coffee, so why not go for the switch and drink healthier.

Website
http://www.runa.org/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Sugar
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on October 18th, 2013
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Capri Sun Roarin' Waters Berry

Capri Sun Roarin' Waters Berry

So you've gone and done it. You've made a kid. Actually you made him/her a couple of years ago. The first couple of months were a living hell of crying and pooping. Finally the little tike started to recognize your face. Things were starting to look up. Then they started walking and everything got awesome. You could do all the cool stuff that you always wanted to do with kids and it was fun as all hell. I mean sure the tears came back out when they got tired, but it wasn't anything you couldn't handle. Suddenly that all changed. Around the 2-3 year mark your kid just became a flat out jerk. They became demanding, thinking everything was put on this planet for their amusement. You know, just a brat.

You find yourself at a point where you will do just about anything for a little peace and quiet away from this monster you created. You find yourself thinking back to the part in the Twilight Zone where the kid can do whatever it wants with it's mind, and changes someone into a Jack in the Box, and it dawns on you that the whole thing was a giant metaphor for the turds that kids can be at this age.

You always swore that you wouldn't let TV raise your kids, but you now understand the allure. It's a distraction, and you need all of those that you can get. You only let your child watch educational TV, you still have some standards. The problem is that it doesn't fully captivate them, so you need to give them some snacks as well. Included in that is a "juice box." Kids love juice. It's sweet and delicious, and they think it's a treat even though when done properly it's healthy for them. Like most parents you find yourself buying a box of Carpri Sun. It's juice in a single serving pouch, which is also fun for the kids. You don't realize until you get home that there is no actual juice in the pouches, that instead it is a "flavored water beverage," and it's sweetened with HFCS. There is essentially nothing healthy about this drink, but at this point you decide, "Screw it." You put the straw in the pouch, and hand it and the remote to your toddler. Let them watch what they want, who cares if it's Godzilla or American Horror Story? You just need some downtime for yourself. You drag yourself back into the kitchen, pop a Capri for yourself and notice that even though there is no juice in it, it still tastes strongly like a nice medley berries and it's got a decent sweetness. You go to the bedroom to read a little bit, but you only make it a couple of paragraphs in before you hear something come crashing down and you have to get up to see what your dumb kid has done now.

Website
http://www.caprisun.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Juice
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on May 4th, 2013
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Caprisun Water Beverage Flavored Roarin' Waters Berry 6 Oz Pouch - 4 Pack

Xiomega Chia Water Berry

Xiomega Chia Water Berry

If I know anything about the Greek alphabet, which in actuality is very little, then this is the end drink. The drink that will either bring about the end of humanity, or else it will be the only drink that survives the impending apocalypse. Hopefully it’s the second option, because besides the fact that it has a very nice light berry flavor, it also has a lot of health benefits that would prove to be beneficial in an end of the world type scenario. It’s chock full of omega 3, fiber, calcium and antioxidants, and we all know that the lack of antioxidants is what is going to bring on the decimation of our planet.

This is the first chia drink I have tried that does not have whole chia seeds in it. This is nothing but liquid, so I’ve you’re concerned about chunks or texture, this won’t be an issue for you. It also has salvia in it. I think you have to smoke it for it to have hallucinatory effects, so don’t go wasting the world’s last source of fluid trying to get high. It just won’t work kids, and then you’ll dehydrate and die…a dried out husk.

Website
http://www.xiomega.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Categories
Sports/Dietary Supplement
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on April 20th, 2013
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Xiomega3 Chia Nutritional Drink, Water Berries, 16 Fluid Ounce

5-Hour Energy Berry

5-Hour Energy Berry

A couple weeks ago I went to PAX East aka Penny Arcade Expo in Boston, MA. It's basically a giant gaming convention stemming from a long running webcomic about video games. It was my first time attending and I had a lot of fun.

In addition to all the new and upcoming games, there was a 5-Hour Energy booth set up in the front lobby all weekend. Normally I would avoid these little bottles of death like the plague, but the line for the coffee shop in the hotel was always way too long and I didn't want to get my ass handed to me when I was playing Halo 4 against some 6 year old. Over the weekend, I lost count at 4 or 5 of these consumed. I'm afraid to know the actual number, but I did manage to bring an additional 5 home with me somehow.

Does this taste like "berry"? Sure. Could it be mistaken for another flavor? Most likely. Did I barely notice the flavor due to consuming this in one sip due to over-exhaustion and wanting to just "wake up"? You betcha! Did it work? Indeed it did.

Website
http://www.5hourenergy.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink, Shot
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Derek Neuland on April 8th, 2013
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5-Hour Energy - Berry 1.93-Ounce Packages (Pack of 12)

Summit Red Thunder Energy Shot Berry

Summit Red Thunder Energy Shot Berry

I think the median price for energy shots right now is around $3. I rarely/never buy energy shots, but I'm always noticing them at checkout counters and if they were cheaper I would probably buy them more often to review. I'm guessing $3 is what they usually are because that's the price that makes me hesitate with drinks. If it's a root beer, cream soda, or cola that we haven't reviewed this hesitation goes away.

There wasn't any hesitation with this energy shot because it was 99 cents at Aldi. For those who don't have Aldi grocery stores in their town, it's the cheapest store around. If Dollar Tree expanded their food selection by 6 rows and added a cooler and freezer, it would basically be another Aldi store. Don't get me wrong, there's sometimes some great food for cheap there, but more often than not it's bottom of the barrel as far as quality.

With that said, I wasn't expecting much from this energy shot. It tastes exactly like cherry Nyquil. I recently was sick and had to take some so it's taste is fresh in my mind. It's not as thick (thankfully), and hopefully won't put me to sleep because I have a lot of work to do. I thought it was going to taste a lot worst, so I'm pleasantly surprised.

Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink, Shot
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Derek Neuland on December 3rd, 2012
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