Cafe Mocha (2 reviews)

Cafe Escapes Cafe Mocha

Cafe Escapes Cafe Mocha

Oh sir. You look so cold. Please, please. Come in to my coffee shop and I will give you a drink on the house. Look at you. Your nose is as red as a...well your nose is red and you've got to get that wet coat off. Let me take that, sir. Come in, sit sit sit. I've got something I think you will like. It's a mocha latte. No sir, we do not only serve, how you say, "regular coffee." I've got for you, my cold sir, a hot cup of mocha. Relax sir and just enjoy your cup of mocha.

Well sir, have you enjoyed your coffee? What? Sir, are you accusing me of using one of those dastardly Keurig machines to make our classic Italian coffee? Sir I can assure you...what? You what? You saw in the garbage that there are approximately three dozen used K-cups in there? Well sir, you've got us. Now you're going to tell everyone and our coffee shop will be closed. You...you aren't going to tell anyone? Thank you sir. Also, since you know that secret, you should know that I am really putting on an act with this whole "sir" thing. I did bring you in because you looked like a wet rat, though. That one was rightfully on me. So seriously dude, what did you think of the coffee? Just alright? Why? Yeah, you know what? It does just kind of tastes like a half and half coffee and hot chocolate. Oh, you got that little bit of diet taste, too? Yeah, I don't know. It's not advertised as diet but for some reason it's got that in there.

How do you feel, man? Are you better? Warmer? Oh, you're welcome. Come in any time. You know that we charge like five dollars for these cups of coffee and at the rate that we sell them and the fact that they're like a quarter at the quantity that we buy them at, giving you a free coffee when you come in if you promise not to say anything is only fair. Have a good day, man. Oh, hey! If you're not busy tomorrow night, my Chicago cover band is playing down at the Rusty Lobster. You should come down. Oh, you're busy, that blows. Well have a good night.

Website
http://www.keurig.com/cafeescapes
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Coffee, Keurig
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on November 3rd, 2013
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Buy Now
Café Escapes Café Mocha, K-Cup Portion Pack for Keurig Brewers, 24-Count

Cafe Bustelo Cool Cafe Mocha

Cafe Bustelo Cool Cafe Mocha

You're a classy lady and you deserved to be treated right. You don't need that guy over there, giant padded shoulder suit coat, slicked back hair, button up shirt with a skinny tie, hair as tall as the eye can see. You need a man like me. Baby, it's 1985 and it's time to stop getting with "Yes Men" and get with a man that will make you scream "yes!" That's where I come in. Baby, this dance club is playing the right songs, New Order, Joy Division, The Smiths, and we're getting down. Do you want something to drink, baby? I'll get you something nice.

What a strange bar. I got you something but it's not the martini a classy dame like you deserves. Honestly, strange bar. I mean who serves cold cans of mocha coffee at a dance club? Oh, yes, so I got you a cold can of mocha coffee. I've had this before but always at a corner store, never a club. Drink it. I know you've got a cosmopolitan there but just take a sip. It's good, right? It's a nice coffee taste but with a cocoa mix. It has a good coffee aftertaste, too, like real coffee. It's not too sweet that it tastes bad for you but is sweet enough that it's a nice little treat.

Wait, where are you going? Are you leaving with that grease ball? Really? Oh, he does have a rather gorgeous Lamborghini Countach. Why didn't you tell me? I would have saved two dollars on buying you that drink. Naw, you deserve it baby. Can you ask your man if he can take me for a spin? No? Alright. Welp, see you later.

Website
http://cafebustelo.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Evaporated Cane Juice
Categories
Coffee
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on August 24th, 2012
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