Chocolate (15 reviews)
Bevi Chocolate
No one? No one has a bottle opener? The ones in this gift shop in Mexico don't work for some reason. One would assume that a drink and bottle made in the same country would expect compatible. Now I'm walking around Cozumel with a bottle of chocolate milk looking like a jerk. Looking like a dude, with a giant beard, whom is nearly thirty carrying around an unopened bottle of chocolate milk. I hope people don't think I'm trying to lure in little unsuspecting Mexican kids to work on some American sweat camp.
Oh sir, please. You've got to help me. Do you...you do?! Thank you so much. Finally I can drink this...mediocre chocolate milk. I looked all around Mexico only to be proven correct in my assumption that this was going to taste like watery chocolate milk. Great. A dollar well spent for some is a dollar wasted for others. I wish I had more time here so that I could make up for this, but alas, my ship is sailing and I'm exhausted from haggling, poorly, for authentic sugar skulls.
- Country
- Mexico
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Categories
- Milk
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 12/2/2011
Rob's Really Good Chocolate
For the first time on US soil, we bring to you, chocolate tea. "Oh, that's so American." you say to yourself. "They'll put chocolate in everything." and to that I respond with this:
Chocolate is delicious, can be good for you, and is no different than adding fruit to flavor your food so get off your high horse, a phrase that has never made sense to me, and drink this.Are "high horses" a breed of horse? Are they just tall horses? If you have the tallest horse in a pack of horses...herd of horses...gaggle of horses, does that mean you have the "high horse"? I don't really care if I'm right or wrong because I'm picturing people getting out a piece of wood and drawing lines on it like you would every year your kids grow up and you want to make a growth chart just to see who has the tallest horse. It's a hilarious vision that I would like to retain for quite some time.
You like sweet tea, right? You like chocolate, right? You like experimenting by assuming that putting two things you like together can't be wrong, right? Welp, so does Rob and he made something really nice. Essentially, all he did is make some quality black tea and put some cocoa powder in it and make this gem. Yes, more happened than that, but I'm guessing that you could do close to this by doing what I described above. It's really good. Better colder than now, but nonetheless, pretty exceptional and quite different than any tea you've ever had before, unless of course, you've had this before and in that case, it's quite parallel.
- Website
- http://www.robsreallygood.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Organic Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Iced Tea
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 10/17/2011
McDonalds McCafe Shake Chocolate
Do you remember when your parents used to take you to McDonald's and it was an event? I do. I remember the sights and sounds and smells of it. I don't know if it's because we didn't really ever go or because the whole family would get in the car and we'd drive there and go together. Hamburger, cheeseburger, or McNugget. That's all we would get. Their menu now is very elaborate but their staples, albeit terribly unhealthy now that we know what "good food" is, are still there and still guiltily delicious once every six months.
That's about the frequency that I go to McDonald's. Once every six months. Yeah, sometimes I go through the drive through to get a sweet tea, but that's not really considered a trip.
Today my girlfriend and I went to get some nuggets and we decided to try their McCafe shakes. We got a strawberry (review coming soon) and a chocolate (where you are now). It's simple; take a regular McDonald's shake, whip in some whipped cream, add more whipped cream, and put a cherry on top. It tastes more like a frozen yogurt or a half melted ice cream than a shake. McDonald's has this thing where they make the shakes so hard to get through a straw that by the time you are finished with one, your cheeks look like they've been put through as much stress as Louie Armstrong's did in his entire career. It was very creamy and not too sweet and the additional whipped cream made it even smoother once you drank half of it and everything kind of mixed together.
It is a nice alternative to a classic shake and although it could never replace the standard, it isn't that far from it where it feel like cheating, like if you were dating a sister and she had a twin and you kissed on her a little bit. It's close enough that no one can blame you. That's how it works, right?
- Website
- http://www.mcdonalds.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Categories
- Milkshake
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 9/10/2011
Crave Chocolate
What do I crave? I crave chocolate milk that is thick. I want chocolate milk that is on the cusp of a milkshake. Why? Why would you ask me? Do you like thin, runny chocolate milk? That's for kids...well chocolate milk is for kids. I mean, chocolate milk is for everyone. Greg, a dude I work with who beat me in go-carts over the weekend, cannot stop drinking these once he starts and he's in his thirties. This is nice, thick chocolate milk. It's got a rich flavor that you don't care about slamming. Plus, due to the fact that it's in that rad aluminum can, you can shake it up all you want and create perfect, frothy chocolate milk. What more could you ask for? You want one now, don't you? I'm a salesman. I'm hired.
- Website
- http://icravemilk.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Categories
- Milk
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 6/30/2011
- Comments
- 1 Comment. Leave a comment.
Zico Pure Premium Coconut Water Chocolate
Let me tell you right off the bat. Thirsty Dudes, as a whole, are not crazy about coconut water. It's nothing against manufacturers, it's just that we drank a handful of them and we just never had one that we liked. Recently Zico contacted us out of the blue and stepped up to the plate. They said that they had chocolate coconut water that we might be interested in. I took the challenge today. Here's how it went.
I knew that I didn't want to drink it lukewarm so I threw that cat in the fridge for a couple hours. That was problem number one is that warm coconut water is more creamy than refreshing. I had a nice, crisp, fresh bottle and I cracked it open and took a sip. It was great. Finally, an entire new category of drinks has emerged for the taking. The chocolate taste was good. It has a good chocolate smell almost like chocolate ice cream. It tasted like really smooth chocolate milk. Initially, I could not taste the coconut, which is great because I didn't go into this liking coconut water. As the temperature dropped, I could start to taste it, but it was subtle enough for me to get used to it.
Zico, you've done it. You've converted me. Congrats.
- Website
- http://www.zico.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Coconut
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 6/22/2011
- Comments
- 3 Comments. Leave a comment.
Vitasoy Soy Drink Chocolate
I purchased this little gem as part of a mean sixer at a local Asian supermarket. I have been looking at it but have been too cheap to drop the necessary $4 to buy it. If it were in singles or an assorted pack, dude, I would have reviewed all of them, but when it comes to spending $4 on a juice box that I am going to drink one of and give the rest away, it's hard. I know my girlfriend has drunk two, Derek has one, I just drank one and that leaves a few more. I think I promised Jay one. Anyhow, the review...
I was impressed. I have had some strange, imported soy chocolate milk and they are gross. This rivals YooHoo, but probably not Nesquik because that is pretty darn fantastic in my opinion. This, to me, I think would be kid friendly, too. It's still a crap-load of calories (160) but if your son is lactose intolerant and needs chocolate milk, this won't make him get sick.
I really think that this could stand the kid taste test, too. If you had your kid drink 15 non-market chocolate milk boxes and then snuck one of these buddies in there, two things would happen.
1. I would call CPS on you because you just gave your kid 16 chocolate milks in one sitting and are a terrible parent.
2. Before you got carted away by the authorities, your kid wouldn't be able to tell the difference.
If you're vegan or lactose intolerant, get this. If you still don't want chocolate milk, enjoy your menial desk job, your boring car, your turkey sandwiches with the crust cut off, and your "Hang In There" cat poster, turd.
- Website
- http://www.vitasoy.com/
- Country
- Hong Kong
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 6/20/2011
Zuberfizz CocoFizz Chocolate
I've been sitting on this for a long time. I knew it was going to be at very least interesting so I wanted to get some other stuff out of the way first, hence the large gap between Zuberfizz reviews.
I don't know who the Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory is, but they've (apparently) teamed up with the Zuberfizz crew in order to create this little treat.
I, for the life of me cannot place what the chocolate reminds me of. My friend said that it was like the chocolate you get from Kinder Surprise, a Canadian treat which is essentially a hollow chocolate ball with a toy in it. To the tongue, this is a great drink, but once it goes down your throat, it's a little strange. The fizz almost makes it seem like a spicy chocolate. Once it's down your throat you get a nice aftertaste of a real genuine chocolate taste that's quite pleasing. The smell is great, too.
I've got it! It tastes like chocolate PEZ. Don't know what they taste like? Find 'em and buy 'em and tell me I'm wrong. I dare you. Chocolate PEZ. My friend says it also smells like chocolate Tootsie Pops. Together I'd say we nailed it. Track this down. It's fun. Have fun with pop. Pop is fun.
- Website
- http://www.zuberfizz.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Pure Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Soda Pop
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 6/1/2011
CalNaturale Svelte Chocolate
This drink is good. So high in calories that I felt like only drinking half, but whatever. It goes down really smooth and that's because it's a thick drink. Not milkshake thick, unless you leave your milkshakes in the car when you run into the store to get your pre-packaged noodle dinners that you feel like you need to get because you've got a coupon that makes them free so you can feel like you're on Extreme Couponing. The erythritol doesn't kick in until the drink is long gone down your seemingly endless gullet and last for a strangely long time, like minutes. Erythritol, to me at least, makes my mouth water, and although it's not a bad thing, and I can deal with it, it lets me know that "something" is going on continuously with what I just ingested.
As a protein drink this is awesome. Although it's only got 16 grams of protein on top of a whopping 260 calories, you've probably just burned it off whilst running a half marathon. Don't worry, pal, you'll hit that 26.2 soon enough and you can tear that "13.1" sticker off your Rav 4 and slap on a fresh, new, impressive "26.2" sticker. No one thinks you're less of a person because you've got that on there. I don't think that I could put a "6.55" sticker on my car. Cheer up. Put those sweet shoes, extra short shorts, and dumb hat on and go run that marathon.
- Website
- http://sveltebrand.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Erythritol
- Categories
- Energy Drink, Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 5/27/2011
- Comments
- 1 Comment. Leave a comment.
Chocomel Chocolate
Yeah, it's just chocolate milk, mom. You don't understand what it's like. Do you know what it is like to be 13? It's hard. You've got girls and homework. Well...yeah, you might have had girls and homework, too. And you had to ride in cars without seat belts? Well whatever, mom. It's 2011 and everything is harder. This chocolate milk isn't even from here. It's from the Netherlands. I don't even know what it is. It's illegal to have in this country. Oh, you just can't sell it here, but it's fine if it comes in? Well, check it out. Glass bottle. Oh, everything you had was in a glass bottle? You must have had it rough? Do you want to share this Chocomel? It's pretty good. It's like a real Nesquik. It's not as creamy but tastes more natural. You know what? I know I'm all grown up at 13, but you're pretty cool, even if you do drive a minivan. Oh, you had to sell your motorcycle when you had me? Sorry, man, you're tough.
- Website
- http://www.chocomel.nl/
- Country
- Netherlands
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Categories
- Milk
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 4/8/2011
reGen Muscle Recovery Beverage Chocolate
Here is the latest installment of our recent influx of protein/workout drinks. The point of this drink is to help out in muscle recovery after a workout. This specific formula was designed with three parts carbohydrates to each part protein to help with the muscles.
This is chocolaty. Dark chocolatey with only a little bit chalky texture. Not enough to be problematic. A friend said it tasted like a high end Yoo-Hoo. I can see that, except it's thicker. I should really work out more. Winter has made me lazy. When I finally shake this laziness off I will have to drink these afterward. How hysterical would it be if I got ripped? That would be laughable.
- Website
- http://www.regen2recover.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 3/31/2011
- Comments
- 1 Comment. Leave a comment.
