Energy Drink (24 reviews)

Neon Energy Drink

Neon Energy Drink

I believe that this beverage is the first sign that the dystopian future that was portrayed in all of those movies from the 80’s is our current reality. To be fair the rise in popularity of energy drinks was probably the first sign, but this is a drink that GLOWS IN THE DARK. Sure, you need a black light, but it still GLOWS. If that’s not a sign that the future is now I don’t know what is. Think about it the world IS a pretty miserable place nowadays. There are disasters everywhere, people live in fear, and the police force is out of hand in a lot of cases. What we need is an action star to come and save the day. He/she would probably end up drinking this energy drink to aid them in his/her vigilantly-ism.

This may glow in the dark, which still seems insane to me (it’s the quinine that causes it to happen), but most of the aspects of this beverage would actually make it a healthier energy drink. There is no taurine involved and the sugar mainly comes from fruit juice with a little crystalline fructose mixed in. It was formulated to give you a nice energy burst, without the crash. That’s what this society really needs. The crashes make everyone miserable and make them “medicate” more often and before you know it a large portion of the human race is downing mass amounts of energy drinks just to make it through their day. No one wants to be in that situation, and Neon seems to be fighting the good fight in that regard.

As far as flavor goes, this is tropical fruit flavored. 24% of the ingredients in this can are juices including pear, passionfruit, blueberry, raspberry, strawberry, cherry and cranberry. Only one of those is tropical in my book, but the combination is pleasant on your tongue. There is a slightly harsh bitterness mixed in that I can’t quite pin down, but it gives the drink character. When I drank it right out of the fridge it mostly tasted like passionfruit and strawberry, but as it gets closer to room temperature the other fruits are more apparent. I enjoy a beverage that tastes slightly different depending on how you drink it. It’s the future, it’s science, it’s scary, but oh so tasty.

Website
http://www.vi.com/products/neon
Country
United States
Sweetener
Crystalline Fructose
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on September 12th, 2015
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Neon Energy Drink 8.4 oz (6-pack)

XL Energy Drink

XL Energy Drink

What we have here is a fairly standard classic energy drink. It seems wrong to call it a classic, but this year marks the 30 year anniversary of Red Bull (even though it didn’t become popular until much later). I mean according to Google cars are considered to be classic if they are over 20 years old. By those standards this flavor is an antique. The passing of time is a very strange thing indeed.

If you’ve had energy drinks you have an idea of how this tastes, and it’s a flavor you initially probably did not care for, but if you’re like me you grew to love it. There’s nothing wrong with making similar products at a lower cost. Save yourself some cash and bypass the bigger brands for a can of this. It tastes the same and gives you the same boost. I mean you can still buy that Red Bull if you want to be a fool.

Website
http://www.xl-energy.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucrose
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on August 14th, 2014
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51 Fifty Energy Drink

51 Fifty Energy Drink

Okay sir, and what kind of oil did you want us to put into your car today? 51-50? Sir do you know anything about oil? I dare say you don’t because that number has nothing to do with oil. I’m looking for a response along the lines of 10W-30 or 5W-20. The only two things I know about 51-50 is that I think they were a Canadian band in the 90’s and apparently it’s the California legal code for someone who is a danger to themselves and others. Oh yeah, it’s also a Van Halen record, or Van-Hagar to be more precise.

You say that it’s also the name of an energy drink that you partake in quite a bit? Well I’ve never heard of it, but I’ll keep my eyes out for it. Working in this garage all day I need something to help me keep awake, and I’ll tell you the coffee they have here is butt, if you’ll excuse my French. Oh you have a can I can have? Well thank you sir. I mean I did just insult you, but I appreciate this.

Hmmm…this is actually pretty good. It tastes different than Red Bull and it’s hundreds of imitators. It has a berry heavy fruit punch style flavor, without tasting childish or cheap. It’s a nice change up from the chemical citrus candy flavor that’s the norm. This actually doesn’t taste very chemical at all. You say it’s an energy drink with a boost? What does that mean? Oh the usual suspects such as ginseng, taurine and caffeine are in here, but they also add maca and astragalus root to it? Well sir, I have no idea what those things are but it tastes good and if it gives me energy this will go on my shopping list. They are used to boost the immune system, strengthen vitality, improve sexual desire and raise resistance against fatigue? Well, this drink really does it all doesn’t it?

This has been the weirded oil change I’ve ever given sir, but I appreciate the break and the drink. I really do need to know what kind of oil you would like me to use though.

Website
http://www.51fiftyenergydrink.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on February 22nd, 2014
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51 FIFTY Energy Drink - Original 12 Oz. - 24 cans/case

Icon Energy Drink

Icon Energy Drink

Dear Energy Drink World,
I know your secret, your big, dark secret about your lineage that you don’t want the world to find out about. You know what, I’m going to tell the world, and expose you for what you are. I know who the father of energy drinks is. He was once a boy who found a golden ticket that granted him and his conman grandfather access to the world’s greatest candy factory. Once they were inside they tricked the kind, gentle owner/operator of the factory into signing the deed for everything over to them.

At first it was business as usual, making all of the candy the factory always produced, but in secret that boy who was quickly becoming a man performed savage experiments with the candy and added chemicals to them for various results. It wasn’t until the original owner of the candy factory passed on that the boy who was now a devious man unleashed his new creations upon the world under various names so it couldn’t be traced back to him and his lucrative candy business. He took the world by storm with what he called energy drinks.

You see when he was young he realized that sugar candy made kids go bonkers so he decided to up the ante and add taurine, caffeine and various other ingredients to make a beverage that would be the same to adults, but with greater effects. He started various companies, each of which used a different candy base for the energy chemicals to be added to. They all had similar but unique flavors.

One such company was Icon. For this formula he added the usual suspects of energy infused ingredients to a base that was made primarily of blue raspberry sweet tarts, heavy on the blue aspect of it. The result was very similar to his other companies, but it had a slightly different candy flavor to it, that actually stood out more than was expected. It was essentially a blue raspberry version of his flagship energy company, Red Bull.

Now you see the world knows your secrets, but I fear I am too late. Your drinks have been embraced by society and they consume and enjoy them to such an extent that they won’t even care that you bastardized a wholesome candy company. It look like you win this time Charles.

Website
http://iconenergydrink.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucrose
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on July 28th, 2013
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Roaring Lion Energy Drink

Roaring Lion Energy Drink

In a theoretical fight, who do you think would win, a lion or a bull? What if one of them happened to be roaring and the other was colored red for some reason? Some might say that the lion would win because it has sweet fangs and claws (aka it’s a lot sweeter and more candy-like). Others may choose the bull because of its ravaging horns (aka more carbonation). Me, I think it’s a pretty even match and that both parties should just nod their heads and walk away from each other. I mean this is all theoretical of course.

Website
http://roaringlion.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucrose
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on March 24th, 2013
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16 Pack - Roaring Lion Energy Drink - 12oz.

Havoc Energy Drink

Havoc Energy Drink

In 2011 I came across a can of Havoc Energy Drink in a Big Lots in Lansing, MI. Our friend Christian was filling in on drums for my band for a tour and we were there teaching him the songs. As you can see from the review I gave it below, it was garbage. It also had been out of production since 2008, as I learned when I received an email from the gentleman who had recently purchased the company and was planning on reformulating it. Way to have expired goods Big Lots. Anyways, cut to early 2013 and here I sit with a slim can of the reformulated Havoc. I can happily say that it is much better. Luckily it no longer tastes like cough syrup. Instead it tastes like a mixture of raspberry and cherry sodas with a general energy drink taste mixed in. It’s a flavor that doesn’t normally exist in the energy drink universe, and I appreciate the change of pace.

While this isn’t really anything groundbreaking, it is worlds better than the old version. I really have nothing bad to say about this, it just kind of blends in with most of the other energy drinks on the shelves, even though it is not a usual flavor. Actually, you know what? I think I would be more likely to grab one of these from a gas station than the usual suspects in the cooler if I was in need of a little boost on a late night. Havoc, you just bumped yourself up to four bottles.


********************************************************************************************

Old Product Review:

To quote the ever-clever Tony Flaminio, "This drink played 'havoc' on my taste buds." When an energy drink is marked down to $.60, there's probably a good reason, and that reason is probably because it's pretty gross. It tastes like someone took a bottle of cherry cough syrup and combined it with a two liter of sweetened seltzer water. Who wants that? My guess is no one, and that leads me back to the price drop. You may be tempted to buy it because it's cheap, but I say save that change, buy an apple or something with it. You'll be much happier.

EDIT (2011):
I was just emailed and informed that this product has not been in production since 2008. That means this was old and more than likely expired. Thanks Big Lots. The Havoc company has been bought out since then and is going to start producing new drinks soon. So basically if you see this out there check those expiration dates so you don't have a situation like we did.

Website
http://www.havocenergy.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on March 6th, 2013
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none

M-150 Energy Drink

M-150 Energy Drink

Devotion. Courage. Sacrifice. That is the tag line for this company, but I feel like it should also be the Thirsty Dudes motto.

Devotion: We've been reviewing drinks since 2009.
Courage: We have tried some utterly disgusting drinks
Sacrifice: Do you know how many calories we have probably consumed? Not to mention all the sugar we have ingested. I personally recently had to have 6 cavities filled, and 2 teeth pulled. While I'm not blaming that all on Thirsty Dudes, but I'm sure it was a contributing factor.

Apparently this is one of the most popular energy drinks in Thailand. It's non-carbonated, which threw me off at first. I was expecting it to taste like Red Bull, but instead it's like a pineapple-peach juice taste. It's actually not that bad.

Website
http://www.osotspa.com/
Country
Thailand
Sweetener
Sucrose
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Derek Neuland on December 6th, 2012
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M-150 Energy Drink - 8.4 fl oz by Osotspa.

Sex Drive Energy Drink

Sex Drive Energy Drink

On the ship, there is a nightclub called "Rex." Since there is only one club, everyone who doesn't want to sleep is there and the joint is jumpin'. It's like a club for everyone because all sorts of people go; fat, white, black, latin, skinny, and everything in between. A few people who go are there to dance and have fun but some people are there to hunt. It's that animal instinct that brings me to this drink.

Only one of the guys we're with out of the eight of us is single and he is the epitome of single. Now I'm no stupid idiot. I know that drinks like this don't "work" like an ignoramus would think. No one that has their head on correctly would actually think that drinking one can of this stuff will make you a dynamo in the sack. Yeah, sure if you feel you need help in that department it might not sound like it could hurt and you'll try anything.

Regardless of your sexual prowess, you will be disappointed because this just tastes like Red Bull. Horny goat weed is something you buy at truck stops to stay awake while laying down night miles in your truck, not something you use for stimulation.

At the end of the night, our single friend and I split a can of this and didn't talk about it because there was nothing to talk about. We had something to look forward to because it's a drink called "Sex Drive," but not good enough to talk about. After that drink, singing karaoke, and watching a good comedian, we called it a night without even going to Rex. Maybe tomorrow. Hopefully tomorrow. It's fun in there.

Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Energy Drink, Other/Weird
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on May 5th, 2012
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Cutting Edge Diamond Energy Drink

Cutting Edge Diamond Energy Drink

32 oz of the worst energy drink ever. Instead of being on the 'cutting edge' of huge cans, they should work on making one that a normal human can enjoy. I'm so disgusted at this drink that I’m not even going to give it the courtesy of an amusing story.

Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucrose
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
1/5
Reviewed By
Derek Neuland on March 7th, 2012
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Trojka Energy Drink

Trojka Energy Drink

I can safely say this is the first energy drink from Austria I've ever had. My friend Rita brought it back from her travels and gifted it to me. I could tell before I even opened it that it was going to be a Red Bull clone. Was I right? Of course! As far as Red Bull wannabe's, this one leans on the better side, but still not as good as Red Bull.

I expected more from you Austria.

Website
http://www.trojkaenergy.ch
Country
Austria
Sweetener
Sucrose
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Derek Neuland on January 3rd, 2012
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