Mojito (2 reviews)

Rockstar Mojito

Rockstar Mojito

This…oh boy…this drink. This is something. The something this is just happens to be one of the worst beverages I have ever tasted. At first my brain told me that this tastes the way that horses smell. I know that shouldn’t be correct, since horses smell nothing like mint nor lime, but that was the signal that my taste buds were reporting back to my cranium. I don’t even know if that makes any sense to anyone, so I will put it another way. This also tastes like what I could only assume it would be like if you cool a bottle of coolant for a car and mixed in the fakest lime flavor you have ever tasted and then gave it some sort of coolness that you will then try to trick people into thinking is mint, even though it tastes nothing like any sort of mint that you have tried before. I couldn’t make it past a few sips of this. I really tried too, because I knew I was going to have a very late night, but I just could not convince myself that by drinking this I was drinking poison that would inevitably lead to my death.

This is the single worst energy drink I have ever tasted and I can only pray to whatever gods it is that I (don’t) believe in that it is discontinued.

Website
http://www.rockstar69.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Erythritol
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink
Rating
1/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on February 25th, 2018
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Crystal Light Mocktails Mojito

Crystal Light Mocktails Mojito

Kraft Foods sent us a sample of Crystal Light Mocktails and out of the goodness of my heart I made a pitcher of this and poured a glass for my girlfriend and myself. When I was pouring, she asked, "You have to make that in a pitcher." thinking that I had poured powder into cups and was just going to mix it up. Like I don't know how to read the simplest of directions. I quickly mocked her and brought her a glass with crushed, not cubed, ice. Honestly, when you have the option of having crushed ice, why would you ever go back? Oh, it gets my drink colder, faster? Naw, I'll go with the classic. Please.

So, not drinking, I don't know the pleasure or sorrow of a "real" mojito. I've had mojito drinks; little bit of lime, little bit of mint; but I've never had a pure, authentic one. So here's how my authenticity review process went:

Me: What do you think? Does this taste like a real mojito?
J: No. It tastes really diet.
Me: It's not really a mojito but compared to a real one, what do you think.
J: Well, I guess it tastes a little like it. If you put some rum and mint in this, it would taste pretty good.
Me: Well there is mint in here.
J: Actually it tastes a lot like a mojito.
Me: ...

Straight from someone who has had a mojito, and so that I'm not some poseur, there's your review. Within half a glass, you too can come full circle and feel like you're drinking a real mojito. My review? Sure. It's not bad. It doesn't really taste diet and actually all of the flavors are pretty calm and subdued but if they were any more enhanced, I feel that it would get overwhelming and might not be as quenching. I didn't get a lot of mint flavor, but the lime was there. It wasn't bad and I've got several more packs of the stuff that I won't get upset if I find made in my fridge. One small pack makes two quarts so a little bit goes a long way. This will be great for a party we're having next week for all those women who are watching their figure. Dudes, it's for you, too. It's just a drink. There is nothing fem about drinks.

Website
http://www.crystallight.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Aspartame
Categories
Diet, Mix/Concentrate
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on June 21st, 2011
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Crystal Light Drink Mix - MOJITO, 1.41 oz. (Pack of 6)
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