Raspberry (21 reviews)
Lipton Brisk Raspberry
Sometimes I feel dumb reviewing things everyone in the world has had but then I think that someone out there wants to hear what I have to say about something that they know rather than something that they don't know. I will say this; iced tea should not let out an audible "psst" when you open the cap. There is nothing in iced tea that is natural that should do that so it's either their high pressure sealing technique or something else but I don't like it. I do think that this is light years better than their regular Brisk. That stuff is undrinkable. I feel that the raspberry kind of takes the edge off a bit. Raspberry is the mediator between good and evil.
This came in a giant bottle for a dollar and that's a bit much. I would have paid more for less if the quality were there. I have done it before and would do it again. Look, I know this isn't anything that people don't know and think every day like "tacos are delicious" but I'm putting it out there so someone reads it and turns things around. No one would be offended if Lipton dropped the Brisk line all together and focused on their PureLeaf or 100% Natural line because this tea is cheap garbage. I mean that in the nicest way, Lipton.
- Website
- http://lipton.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- High Fructose Corn Syrup
- Categories
- Iced Tea
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 4/17/2012
- Comments
- 1 Comment. Leave a comment.
Mate Fusion All Natural Raspberry
Today, a man, or perhaps a man trapped in a boy's body, called "Peter Pan" wrote me essentially asking why we, these Thirsty Dudes, wrote stories that go nowhere instead of writing reviews about how the drink tastes. For you, friend, I will write one of the most boring reviews that will explain to you why we do things the way we do them:
Mate Fusion All Natural Raspberry Tea is a very good tea. It has nice, prominent notes of raspberry mixed with the inherent bitterness of yerba mate. This drink is all natural and you can taste the difference between this and a tea made with manufactured sugars and preservatives. The bitterness of the yerba mate mixed with the sweetness of the tea mixed with the fruitiness of the raspberry creates a pleasurable cornucopia of flavors. Mate Fusion All Natural Raspberry Tea is a high quality beverage that I would recommend to anyone who likes sweetened tea. I feel that it is a safe, entry-level yerba mate for those who might be on the fence about previous experiences with it.
That was splendid. I hope you enjoyed my legitimate review and not a story about how cats don't like yerba mate because the bitterness makes their hair stand up on end so people don't like to pet them because they look mean but are really having a reaction to the taste. That would be dumb and stupid.
- Website
- http://www.matefusiondrink.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Iced Tea
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 2/29/2012
Laziza Non Alcoholic Malt Beverage Raspberry
Along the I-90 in South Buffalo lies the abandoned Buffalo Malting Company. It’s funny because I must have driven past it nearly a thousand times in my life, but it never registered. When someone mentioned it to me I actually had to put effort into finding it. I passed by twice until I realized where it was. It had become so engrained (no pun intended) in my mind as part of the scenery that I just wasn’t registering it as an individual building. Then I saw a couple of jag off teenagers smashing things there. What fills people with the need to destroy things for no reason other than destroying it? It’s infuriating. Sure it’s abandoned but it’s apart of the cities history and it’s interesting to see what has been left behind.
I’m 99.9% sure that the grain that was processed in that building was never used to make soda, but a guy can dream can’t he? I just picture it back in the 50’s and the guys are strolling into work carrying their huge metal lunch pals with smiles on their faces because they know their hard work is going to make tasty sodas for the world to enjoy. During their shifts their minds will wander wondering what flavoring will be added to the malt. Will it be pineapple, grape or maybe a nice fancy raspberry? They each would get a case to bring home to the family on weekends and everyone would gather around the picnic table eating hot dogs and washing them down with a nice delicious malt.
The problem with this scenario is that I just cannot see kids enjoying malt soda right off of the bat. I think it’s something of an acquired taste. I certainly didn’t like it the first time I had it (I still think straight up malt drinks like Malta Goya are very high on the list of worst drinks ever). They have a weird grainy barley taste to them. It’s like a non-alcoholic beer, which is also disgusting. The more I drink them to review for Thirsty Dudes the more I appreciate the complexity of the flavor. Perhaps if you grew up drinking them since you were little it would be a flavor that you loved. This particular malt would definitely take a shorter time to grow into. It’s got a nice raspberry taste similar to a lot of raspberry iced teas, but instead of being mixed with tea it is mixed with processed grains. Strange, but who am I to judge? Oh yeah, I’m a professional drinkologist.
- Country
- Lebanon
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Categories
- Soda Pop
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 2/7/2012
Best Health's Gourmet Soda Raspberry
Mark, I quit. I thought this was going to be a dream job for me, but everything went wrong. Dealing with soda day in and out is what fills my mind grapes as I sleep. You know how people count sheep to help them fall asleep? Well, I count soda bottles. I know it sounds insane, but it’s my passion. The thing is I can’t have my work be a lie. When I submitted my resume to Best Health I believed this company believed in the betterment of the state of our fellow man’s health. I suppose it’s my fault that I didn’t do more research on the company, but I really thought that what we made here was going to be carbonated fruit juice with no sweetener added. That is what I think of when I think of healthy soda. That’s not what we make here at all though. What we produce and peddle is flavored sugar water with some bubbles in it. Actually the bubbles aren’t a part of the problem at all. They are actually pretty great. The problem is that this soda isn’t even close to healthy. Sure it’s better for people that corn syrup sweetened soda, but what isn’t? On top of that our flavors aren’t even that grape. I’m really only basing this statement off of our raspberry flavor. When it’s in your mouth it is just sugar soda. There is only the smallest tinge of fruit flavor. When you swallow it does have a generic berry aftertaste, but that’s not what a good soda is. Mark, I really think this company needs a complete overhaul, and unless that begins now I’m walking out that door and never looking back.
Sir I assure you that no matter what number you write down it’s not going to change my mind. Fine write it down and then I’m out that door. Oh wow! A quarter raise?! If you need me I’ll be down in the bottling area. We can’t afford to miss a single shipment!
- Website
- http://www.brooklynbottling.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Soda Pop
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 1/30/2012
Fuze Raspberry
I don't hate Subway. I should let it be known. I enjoy a nice chicken teriyaki sub on honey oat with pepper jack, olive, onions, and banana pepper with their chipotle southwest sauce. That's my sub. I also typically get the Fuze tea and was pretty stoked when they partnered up. Problem is, sometimes the people that work there "forget" to make the tea so I'm stuck with Coke or something. Look, Coke. I don't hate you, but when my mouth wants real brewed tea, it doesn't want cola. Black and white, buddy. Black and white.
Today we, the company, all went to Subway and was greeted by a man, possibly and probably homeless, smoking a cigarette which he generously blew in our face as he exited the restaurant. As I looked around in disgust, the patrons on their lunch break had the same face I had on. Together as one, we all would enjoy subs from that moment on. I got my sub and was greeted not by the typical green tea, but by a new and fully stocked raspberry green tea.
As I gleefully filled my over-sized cup, the culprit smoker came back inside and had a cigarette in his mouth and his hands to his mouth, as if to spark up another one. The guy that cashed me out spent 20% of the time looking at me and essentially blindly scanned my card, told me my points, got me cookies, and handed everything to me while 80% watching that dude...ready to make an executive decision to boot him out of there for lighting up another cigarette.
I left, took one sip, and forgot about everything that had happened because this tea is great. Real nice raspberry flavor, not too sweet, and long lasting flavor. This was a delicious treat that I would be privileged to enjoy for twenty-six, uninterrupted ounces. I would make this a regular purchase if all Subway's had it. You hear me giant conglomerate Subway? Make this a standard until something better comes out. I love it!
- Website
- http://www.drinkfuze.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Iced Tea
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 12/22/2011
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Arizona Half & Half Raspberry
Joe was eight. He's nine now, but he was eight when this story took place. Joey had a jerk other brother who always played jokes on him. Joe and his bother Alan went to a little corner store and Joe saw a new bottle of Arizona half and half. It wasn't just any half and half, it was raspberry half and half. When Joe reached in, Alan yelled from across the store and said, "You can't have that. You're not old enough." Joe, who was obviously old enough to drink lemonade and tea, didn't believe him, but after way too much effort on Alan's part, he actually convinced Joe that he needed to be ten to buy that bottle. Alan said that he knew a kid that would make him a fake ID.
They went to Alan's friend Darren's house and they went in the basement. In the basement, Darren had a printer, and a digital camera. He drew a mustache on Joe with magic marker to make him look ten, took the picture, printed it on a photocopy of Darren's mom's old license, covered it in scotch tape, and gave it to Joe. Joe paid Darren the fee, one bag of Tropical Skittles, and they went back to the store.
Joe went up to the counter with his half and half, showed the woman behind the counter the ID, and gave her a dollar. She laughed, handed him a penny, and Joe ran outside, happy to try a new flavor. With a fake mustache, fake ID, one penny, and new drink, Joe was on top of the world. He took his first sip and sighed because he got away with it. It tastes like processed, but not bad, diet lemonade and raspberry iced tea. No one let him know that he didn't need that ID until he was twelve, but by then it didn't matter because he was old enough and didn't need the ID anymore.
- Website
- http://drinkarizona.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- High Fructose Corn Syrup
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 11/21/2011
Black Jack Raspberry
On a pirate ship, everyone knows that you do two things; sing shanty songs and drink iced tea. There are other things that you do, like put knives in the sails and slide down. Pirates call that "the elevator" and it's what kept canvasmen in business those days. Without pirates, we wouldn't have such a large canvas market now. Thanks, pirates. With all the tomfoolery, they were very prone to things like missing hands, legs, and eyes, hence the hooks, pegs, and patches. They didn't have the best of ingredients those days, you know, because they were on a boat, so they had fruit, corn, and water. Yes, they distilled the water. They're pirates, not savages.
Jay found this official pirate iced tea buried in the sand in a bunker at a local golf course. Hey, sand is sand. Pirates can play golf. Poorly, but they can play. They work on their drives off the side of the boats and have for centuries. I dusted it off, opened it up, took a sip, and remember why I hated the "Pirated of the Caribbean" series. This has a strange throat bite thing that you get with low quality, corn syrup drinks. The more you drink it, the more you can drink through it, and the flavor isn't bad. It's like a not-as-great Sweet Leaf raspberry.
Pirated are alright. Modern pirates give historical pirates a bad name. More singing, less holding up rich people on boats, modern pirates.
- Website
- http://www.blackjacktea.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- High Fructose Corn Syrup
- Categories
- Iced Tea
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 11/17/2011
Steaz Zero Calorie Raspberry
I had a flavor of Steaz awhile back and I've been turned off by it since I had one kind that wasn't good. It was a bad first impression and for that, I have taken a Steaz-free vacation. I don't recall what flavor it was, but I want to say that it had something to do with Acai.
This is completely different and actually good on top of the fact that there are no calories. It's like a crazy, alternate universe has emerged from the can. What an ignorant statement if I were actually serious. Like nothing that's good for you is good. Have you ever had corn? How about apples? Tacos grow on trees and guacamole doesn't, that's why guac is always extra.
It's been quite some time since I've had a solid and not something in liquid form, but for what I remember, the flavor is pretty good and honest. You get a sweet erythritol taste, but I've grown to like it so this entire can wasn't even shared by me.
Now all I can think of is a taco tree. I have a feeling that the window of opportunity between ripe and not ripe is very small.
- Website
- http://www.steaz.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Erythritol
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 11/14/2011
Jump Hot Pure Energy Raspberry
This can looks like one that would be used in a Foo Fighters video in order to show the ridiculousness of energy drinks. I can just picture Dave Grohl dressed as a club girl drinking this as he walks past a bunch of guys waiting to get in. And then just as he enters the doorway, he half turns around and winks at someone. Say what you will about the band's music, they have made some great music videos over the years.
Unlike the can, the taste did not make me feel like I was in a club listening to Euro Dance Mix 2004. It's a really light drink. This is probably because, as the can says, it is sugar, carb, and fat free. I can't put my finger on what the taste reminds me of, but it's good! There's no diet taste, and there's definitely no battery acid energy drink taste. I wish I had more than just this one can. I could drink this all the time.
- Website
- http://www.jumpbeverages.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucralose
- Categories
- Diet, Energy Drink
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Derek Neuland on 9/7/2011
- Comments
- 2 Comments. Leave a comment.
Kristall Swedish Raspberry
It's no secret that hip-hop artists drink Cristal when they are partying to show off their riches. I may have just completely dated myself there. Is that still a thing, or did it die off in the late 90's? Either way, it's a little known fact that those who are fans of flavor country, but don't drink alcohol down bottles of Kristall in the same situations.
This is my second flavor of this fine product and both have completely blown my socks off. Literally. I had to go across the room, pick them up and put them back on my feet. They are so light and bubbly, but still jam packed with fruit flavor. In my dream world all fruit flavored pop would be like this. It's not syrupy and it actually tastes like raspberries, not sugar or some other sweetener. It also comes in a very classy and classic looking bottle.
Kristall for when you want to party fancy style. Anything else would be uncivilized....or something.
- Website
- http://www.kristallbeverage.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 8/7/2011
- Comments
- 1 Comment. Leave a comment.