Watermelon (16 reviews)

Spindrift Sparkling Water Watermelon

Spindrift Sparkling Water Watermelon

Spindrift has been good to me. For the past five years I have enjoyed their sparkling beverages with no added sugar. At first they proved to me that soda can exist in a delicious way without being full of sweetener. Then they were a gateway for me to start enjoying seltzer, which I drink constantly now. I thank them for helping keep me on a healthy track. I didn’t always have their products available to me in Buffalo, but because of them I found other companies that filled the void. I cut a ton of soda out of my diet, and transitioned to drinking a lot of unsweetened iced tea.

Now it’s summer and it’s the most humid it’s ever been in Buffalo (not an exaggeration, records have been broken). The heat is nearly unbearable, but I have my beverages to help me get through it, which I promptly sweat out.

I love watermelon, but I never get it for some reason. It’s probably due to laziness, or maybe it’s because eating it outside of a picnic/beach type scenario seems off. I was excited for this drink. It’s in their sparkling water line and not the seltzer one because there is juice added to the sparkling water and that leads to a whopping 3g of sugar. This is the first time Spindrift has really left me wanting. Overall this would be great, except for one thing. The watermelon tastes more like the rind than it does the red mushy fruit part. I don’t know if they just ground up the whole melon, but it’s not really what I’m looking for when I think of watermelon. It’s not horrible, but I wanted something different that they did not deliver. Oh well, one misstep does not ruin a company for me and I will continue to enjoy their other products.

Website
http://www.spindriftsoda.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Sparkling, Water
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on August 21st, 2016
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Four Point Zero Perfect Seltzer Watermelon

Four Point Zero Perfect Seltzer Watermelon

To me seltzer is seltzer, no matter what the brand. I mean it’s just carbonated water with a little flavoring in it. I now love it as an adult, but I was fine with grabbing any brand that was available. Four Point Zero has shown me that I was wrong all this time, and I don’t know if I’m going to be able to forgive them. I mean after tasting the perfection that is this seltzer, how am I supposed to go back to the cheap stuff they have at my grocery store? Those jerks.

Their greatness was proven to me when I drank this bottle of watermelon. That is a flavor that 99% of the time goes wrong and tastes like a Jolly Rancher. Even when sugar is not involved it still tastes like candy. This bottle is the new standard though. It tastes like someone squeezed the juice from the melon, watered it down slightly (but not too much), and then carbonated it. It’s all of that but with zero sugar. It’s magic I tell you. I have never tasted a more authentic watermelon beverage that wasn’t just straight juice. The bar has been set, everyone take notice.

Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Sparkling, Water
Rating
5/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on July 14th, 2016
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Tsamma Watermelon

Tsamma Watermelon

Oh man, I really feel like a fool. I’m supposed to bring these five watermelons to a party, and my car won’t start. It’s close enough to ride my bike, but there’s no way I could carry all of these melons. Sure I could probably do one, possibly even two, but five? No way. Wait, I know, my roommate just got a juicer. I’ll mash these things down into a functional size and I’m sure it will be ridiculously refreshing and the hit of the party. I can carry two gallon jugs, no problem.

Wow, this juicer is great, that took maybe five minutes. Sure It would take me about 20 to clean the juicer, but I’m sure no one will think I’m a bad roommate if I just left it dripping on the counter (here’s a secret, I would be a terrible person if I did that). This made way less juice than I expected. Five melons gave me less than one gallon. Oh well, at least it will be easy to carry on my bike. I should round it out with this white grape juice and pomegranate juice just to make it a full gallon. I should also taste it to make sure it’s okay. Wow, adding those juices didn’t really do much flavor-wise. This tastes exactly like concentrated down watermelon, and it even has a little bit of texture to it. It’s way less watery than I had expected. I guess those other juices did add a sweetness to this, that is borderline harsh, but this is going to blow everyone’s mind at the party. This is the perfect drink for sitting in the blazing sun with people that you don’t really want to talk to, but feel obligated to. I think I reinvented summer.

Website
http://tsammajuice.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Juice
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on August 5th, 2015
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Hint Fizz Watermelon

Hint Fizz Watermelon

I should start by saying that what I wanted to drink today and review was a milk tea that Jay and I picked up with Editor Dan on some random trip to Toronto. What in the world were we doing there? Nothing? Just getting drinks? There had to be a reason why we went. Well anyway, that was last year and that milk tea expired in January of this year. Yes, January. We are now in September and this drink, containing milk, expired eight months ago. I thought it best to play it save, chalk it up as a loss, and drink something a little safer.

Which brings us to this drink. Once again, the lovable and beardable Editor Dan bought us a handful of drinks, this being one. I am an enormous fan of the Hint, Ayala, and infused waters. This, though, was different. What was different? Well, if you couldn't guess, it was carbonated. If you have ever drank a sparkling water, AKA "seltzer" you know that there is a strange almost bitterness to it. This contained that oddity. It's strange that if you add carbonation to regular water it tastes like you've carbonated water that has been sitting in a cup for a week at room temperature. This tastes like regular old seltzer water with watermelon flavoring. It's not as strong as say a Polar or Seagram's seltzer, which makes it "worse." "Worse" is a relative term but it's simply not as good.

If you're going to want infused water, get a regular Hint because they are pretty wonderful. If you want a sparkling Hint, stop wanting that and just get real seltzer water.

Website
http://www.drinkhint.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Sparkling, Water
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on September 4th, 2013
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Hint Fizz, Watermelon, 12-Ounce (Pack of 12)
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Day's Watermelon

Day's Watermelon

You've had a watermelon, right? They're great. Seedless you get to eat and not worry about seeds. Seed-full and you get to spit seeds all across town like it is the twenties and you are some sort of fruit crazed mobster just spraying out your friend's car window. Sometimes you get a watermelon that is a bit too soft for your comfort but I think that the flavor is always pretty decent. It's just the texture that goes with old age in a watermelon. The people at Day's have never had a real watermelon a day in their life and this drink is the proof. This tastes like watered down candy watermelon. It's almost flavorless. It just tastes like carbonated sugar water and before you get all "all pop is is carbonated sugar water" this time you would be right. There’s a real lack of flavor going on in this too-big bottle.

For all of the children of yore, this is not the watermelon you remember. This is some new, space watermelon that lacks everything that made the classic watermelon great. Flavor, seeds, and the ability to see how long it would take you to spit a mouthful of seeds.

Website
http://www.dayssoda.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup and/or Sugar
Categories
Soda Pop
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on August 27th, 2013
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Nu Aquos Rehydrate Restore Recover Watermelon

Nu Aquos Rehydrate Restore Recover Watermelon

Jay says to me he says, "We've got this briefcase of drinks and they're like protein drinks but they don't taste like protein drinks." Then he hands me a cardboard briefcase of these drinks. How can I turn down a proposal like that? I could be a high power, yet ecologically concerned, sales person in the time when kids used to have those clear, acrylic backpacks so teachers could see what they are carrying in case they are carrying bombs and/or guns. Ahh, this post-911 world is something, isn't it? We've got to carry around briefcases made of cardboard with little see-through holes so you can see, "No, ma'am. That's not a gun. That's a protein drink. No need to phone the police on me. Have a nice day, now. That's for assuming that because I have a beard and tattoos that I carry around weapons."

So I've got this briefcase of drinks and Jay blows through the other ones and says, "You do the watermelon." Don't have to ask me twice. I drink it and it's good. It's like a Vitamin Water but maybe a little thicker. Not "protein drink" thick, but thick enough for me to feel the need to mention. There wasn't any gross, artificial sweetener taste to it regardless of it actually having an artificial sweetener in it. Then again, actual Vitamin Water doesn't use real sugar and it doesn't taste gross so they might be on to something.

The watermelon flavor is a bit "candied" but isn't so sweet that it is like liquid watermelon candy; a though that makes me sick to my stomach just thinking about. It's not too strong of a watermelon flavor either so it's not offensive even of itself.

Look; yes. I had a briefcase of drinks and although I knew a kid in high school that had a bit of an issue with a pipe bomb, there is no need for me to carry that thing around with me. I can carry opaque stuff just like anyone else and if a cop wants to ask to see what's in my bag, please do. Enjoy my assortment of drinks, inevitably varied metal, pop, and indie rock records, and whatever else I've got in that thing. You sir, you wasted your time because that guy across the street probably has a pound of weed in his hemp, drawstring backpack. I mean, come on, officer. He's wearing a tie dye Grateful Dead dancing bear shirt in the year 2013. No way he'd pee clean.

Website
http://www.nuaquos.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Dextrose
Categories
Sports/Dietary Supplement
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on August 22nd, 2013
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Arizona Watermelon

Arizona  Watermelon

Who needs seedless watermelons? I mean seriously. You're eating watermelon outside and you are almost encouraged to spit the seeds. I don't think I've ever eaten sliced watermelon inside. Sure, cubed watermelon as part of a fruit salad I've eaten inside, but the kind that looks like fruit pizza I think I've only eaten outside. I love the stuff. I love the seeds. There is something therapeutic about filling your mouth with seeds and machine gunning them out. Not at someone as that would be sticky, disrespectful, and pretty disgusting. Just shoot them for distance and for fun.

I'm pretty sure that the whole "If you eat the seeds you will grow a watermelon in your stomach." I think that anyone who has ever believed that was true has never had a garden a day in their lives. I would say that twenty-five percent of my annual garden just doesn't come to fruition due to poor soil, water, drainage, dogs, space, etc. It's hard to grow some things and you need optimal environment to grow a lot of things. You really think that a watermelon could germinate inside your acidic stomach filled with hamburger grease, pop, sugars, no sunlight, and no real nutrients. I mean, you could argue that it was like a composter but it's still far too dangerous for anything to sprout. So that's that.

So if you still aren't convinced that you don't not need seeds, this drink is for you. It's watermelon flavors, as it should be since it claims it is, but it's right in the middle of "real" watermelon and "candy" watermelon flavored. It's a tallboy and should be shared. No one should drink this in one sitting unless they love 300 garbage calories dedicated to a drink that doesn't fully taste like the fruit it represents. I think you could probably eat a whole watermelon for under 300 calories. I wouldn't recommend it as you body would have to go into some sort of fruit shock. That might just be called diarrhea, actually. Don't get me wrong, it's a good drink and is nice on overcast days like this to bring you back to a childhood summer, but for almost twenty-four ounces, this is gluttonous.

Website
http://drinkarizona.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Juice
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on October 31st, 2012
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Arizona Watermelon, 23-Ounces (Pack Of 24)

Cytomax Protein Watermelon

Cytomax Protein Watermelon

I’m a self-proclaimed outdoor kid. Hiking around the woods is one of my favorite things to do. With that being said, as I get older I find myself making it out into the great outdoors a lot less than I used to. This has left me feeling like a slob. I work then I hang out the house or go to band practice. As a result a few months ago I joined a gym. Well because of that and because the amount of sugar I intake is fairly astronomical due to this website. I’m shocked that I have actually kept going, and I find myself more or less enjoying it. I have a routine of when I go, and I stick to it. Even over the past week when it’s been 95+ degrees and I sweat just sitting still.

Today was one of my gym days and I was already sweating like crazy as I climbed out of the basement furnace that is my screen printing shop. I dried off as much as I could and then headed to work out. I feel sorry for the other patrons of the gym. Sure I follow the rules and wipe off the machines when I’m done, I’m not a savage, but while I was on the treadmill sweat was literally pouring off of me. When I was done there was a physical pool of sweat on the floor beneath me. Embarrassed, I cleaned it up and then went to do some lifting. I try not to look at anyone else while I’m there, so I don’t know if anyone was in the same boat as me, but I can only assume they were and I hope they paid me the same courtesy as I did them by ignoring my existence.

By the time I got back home I was completely drenched with sweat and dehydrated. I decided I should give this bottle of Cytomax recorvery drink a try. I figured there would never be a better time. It’s a protein drink, so I expected it to be thick. It’s also watermelon flavored so I expected it to be gross. What I didn’t expect was for it to taste like it does, and that is like a generic Pixie Stix. To be more specific it tastes like someone took a watermelon Jolly Rancher and crushed it to powder. Then for every part powder they mixed in three parts Pixie Stix. Shockingly it’s not disgusting, but it is insanely sweet, in the artificial sweetener kind of way.

I don’t really know if it helped with recovery, but it did quench my thirst, and I strangely enjoyed it. So at least it’s got that going for it.

Website
http://cytomax.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Sports/Dietary Supplement
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on August 6th, 2012
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Jolly Rancher Watermelon

Jolly Rancher Watermelon

When I showed someone a picture of this, they said, "My teeth hurt just looking at that". Rightfully so, this drink is ridiculously sweet. I have described many drinks as tasting like Jolly Ranchers so I was pretty excited to try this branded soda. Did they pull it off? Of course they did, it's their recipe! Despite the overloading sweet taste, I really like how tangy this is. I wasn't expecting it, but it almost has a sour aftertaste that's pretty awesome. Even though it's hard to drink this all in one sitting due to the sweetness, I'm looking forward to trying the other flavors now.

Website
http://www.hersheys.com/jolly-rancher.aspx
Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Soda Pop
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Derek Neuland on January 16th, 2012
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Jolly Rancher Watermelon Soda, 20-Ounce (Pack of 24)

Carousel Gourmet Soda Watermelon

Carousel Gourmet Soda Watermelon

Some pop is strange. You have certain expectations for the way that it tastes. Then, when you actually take a sip, it doesn't abide by your crazy made-up rules. Suddenly, rudely, when you burp, those expectations are met. To drink a bottle of pop that you need to burp to get what you want out of it seems fun, but the ratio of drinking to burping is very far off. Unless you're completely disgusting or completely alone, you aren't going to get your money's worth of burps out of pop.

This drink is right there. To drink, it's sweet and lightly watermelon'd. Then you burp and BAM! Candied watermelon or watermelon candy. Whichever you choose. I have not been very impressed by any watermelon pop or any of Carousel's drinks. I won't stop drinking them but there hasn't been one that I would go back to or even recommend. If you like them, speak up, but there are plenty of other companies that just moderately blow my socks off that I don't feel bad leaving this by the wayside.

Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar and or Corn Sweetener
Categories
Soda Pop
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on November 11th, 2011
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