Mom! Come look what Mittens did! It’s SODAsgusting!
Billy, what did I tell you about yelling while I’m making crème brulee? Do you want me to burn down the…Goddamnit! Did the damn cat pee on the carpet?
Mom, it’s SODAsgusting!
I know Billy go get a rag and we’ll clean it up. What are you doing with that straw! Billy, get away from there! Don’t drink that! It’s disgusting and vile and you are no child of mine!
Mom, chill out it’s SODAsgusting!
You’re damn right it’s disgusting! I can’t believe the fruit of my loins would do so a despicable thing as drinking cat pee off of the carpet! With a straw no less! It’s like you are starring in the movie Pink Flamingoes! You’re grounded mister!
No mom, you’ve got it all wrong! It’s not cat pee it’s Kitty Piddle! It’s a flavor of the Avery’s Soda companies SODAsgusting line! See, here’s the bottle! The name is a joke because of the color of the pop. It’s actually pineapple and orange in flavor. It has that very specific Avery’s flavor. It’s a little on the cheap side flavor-wise actually. It doesn’t taste like the real fruits, just a knock off. It’s not terrible for a kid like me, but I bet you wouldn’t like it. I had a bottle on the coffee table and Mittens knocked it over on the carpet.
Well, that is a relief to say the least. You’re still grounded though for having a soda before your crème brulee. Now clean that up and get to your room!
- United States
- Pure Cane Sugar
- Soda Pop
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on July 2nd, 2012