Not Listed (76 reviews)

Wendy's Blackberry Lemonade

Wendy's Blackberry Lemonade

I have been in Florida for the past five days and I have not done any reviews. I apologize but it wasn't for lack of trying. Where I was wasn't exactly "bodega friendly" and everywhere I went had stuff we already did. To my surprise, when I went to Wendy's to get a strawberry tea they had this little number. Sure, I wish this was a blackberry tea and not blackberry lemonade but I was hot and needed to cool down with something. This was a good choice but a choice I probably won't make again. Why? Well every sip was very sweet and that's just part of the lemonade. She is naturally a sweet beast and Wendy's "medium" is too large and that is a lot of sugar to ingest. The lemonade was nice, though and the blackberry was quite present in every sip. You could see some "stuff" at the bottom (sugar and lemon bits), which is always good when it comes to lemonade.

My thirst was quenched and my temperature dropped but blackberry tea it was not. I know it's not what I ordered but with every sip I wish that it existed. Wendy's if you're reading this, whatever you do to extract the blackberry to put in the lemonade, put it in the tea, too. Your strawberry tea is now a staple every time I go there. The blackberry would instantly and surely surpass that.

Website
http://www.wendys.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Not Listed
Categories
Lemonade
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on May 14th, 2014
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Tim Horton's Frozen Hot Chocolate

Tim Horton's Frozen Hot Chocolate

Frozen hot chocolate is a real "stickin' it to the man" drink. It's as if Tim Horton's is saying, "Screw you, winter. You've pestered us long enough. Now look what we've done to your precious cold weather staple drink. How does that feel? Not good, right? Yeah. Now you know how we felt after your sub-zero temperatures. This is for all the times I had to scrape ice off my car windows while the temperature was in the negatives."

This drink is the eye-for-an-eye that you see in movies where the bad guy has at the good guy's partner and then, at the end, the good guy turns the tables and has a little fun with the bad guy until the cops come. The cops come, know the whole situation, pretend not to see the good guy hit the bad guy's hand with a hammer and then tells the good guy to hit the road and takes the bad guy off to jail.

I have to be honest here; I've already had two of these. They're that good. It's super creamy because they put half a pound of rich, chocolate whipped cream on top, which ends up melding in with the frosty treat beneath and smoothing the whole thing out. If you could envision what a chocolate mousse drink would taste like, this is it. They also put what they probably call "fudge" in it but is really only chocolate syrup. I'm not dismissing their efforts, but that's not fudge. Either way, everything mixed together or intentionally separated upon ordering is a delight that could be anyone's guilty pleasure because it's abominably terrible for you but seriously, you couldn't guess that something with a mound of rich chocolate whipped cream on it is going to be bad for you? Shame on you.

Website
http://www.timhortons.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Not Listed
Categories
Milkshake
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on May 1st, 2014
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Cold Stone Pineapple Blueberry

Cold Stone Pineapple Blueberry

You get that itch that says, "You need something else, man. Get it." and you know what you have to do. Your body arises from its seat, which has held the weight of your body for too long and you begin walking, as if asleep out the door. You get to your destination having no recollection of how you got there and before you know it, you are ordering a smoothie from the window. You shake your head to wake yourself out of the haze you are in and you wake up with a pineapple and blueberry smoothie sitting in a "leather" chair next to a "fire" inside of a fine new establishment filled with employees who want to be anywhere but there and patrons that want to be anywhere but home. As you take your first sip you realize that everything is fine and fades away like smoke from a freshly blown out candle. This is a cold, fruity smoothie that your body craved and didn't give you the opportunity to deny. The blueberry pokes his head out more than the shy pineapple even though it would have been better the other way around. The mix itself is thick and cold and comes out almost tubular through the straw until it melts on your tongue. The seeds and grit and grime of the natural fruit add to the pleasing texture of the drink.

As you take your final sips, the outside world comes into focus and you realize that no more than fifteen minutes have passed and you are a block from work. You just needed a break from the monotony of making other people money. You earned it. Now you have to get back to work.

Website
http://www.coldstonecreamery.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Not Listed
Categories
Smoothie
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on April 15th, 2014
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Tim Horton's Sweet Tea

Tim Horton's Sweet Tea

It's always strange living somewhere where a staple restaurant closes and reopens as something else. Down the street from my office, which I have worked at for six years, there has been an Arby's. Now look, this is not a debate about the quality of Arby's. I personally think that Jamocha shakes are great. Their chocolate turnovers are fantastic and a good old-fashioned roast beef is a fine sandwich. A few months back, it closed abruptly and all was silent about what was going to happen. A month later, rumors started circulating about a Tim Horton's taking its place. A couple months later, late last week, it reopened as a Tim Horton's - Cold Stone combo.

I braved a "blizzard" today to get lunch and I got this little number to drink. It doesn't matter how many inches per hour we're getting, sweet tea is always a sound choice. Especially when it's decent sweet tea as this is, luckily. It's approachably sweet. What do I mean by that? Well some sweet teas are too sweet and people can't handle it. It's fine. It's just that they can't handle it. A 670 horsepower Black Series Mercedes Benz SL63 AMG is a gorgeous car but it's simply too much car for some people to handle.

This tea has a good tea taste and I bet that if I asked, it's one of those large metal brewers that makes over a hundred ounces of tea with sugar in it. That's all it needs to be and I think that's all it is. Now I want to imagine what it's like to drive that Merc. I bet it's life altering. Could I handle all that power? My car has 158 horsepower. What's four times that?

Website
http://www.timhortons.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Not Listed
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on March 12th, 2014
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Dinosaur Barbeque Sweet Tea

Dinosaur Barbeque Sweet Tea

Look at that picture. It is as if the gods of the South have beamed a little bit of their heart and soul down on my rustic table. Ice. Sugar. Tea Period. Done and done, right?

Look. It's not normal that we review something like this that isn't purchasable in a store but they've got eight (current) locations and I'm pretty sure that this recipe is the same throughout the chain.

The only thing that this drink had that is optional is a big ol' slab o' lemon but this, this is what Sweet Tea is. Also, it's cheap, as it should be, and there are unlimited refills, as there should be. Happiness in a canning jar.

Website
http://www.dinosaurbarbque.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Not Listed
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
5/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on February 24th, 2014
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Starbucks Mint Hot Chocolate

Starbucks Mint Hot Chocolate

There are two kind of mint hot chocolate and this is the better one. What makes one better than the other? Well, and I'm dropping names here like some old tart that lived it up in the rock scene of the dirty, dirty seventies. Tim Horton's mint hot chocolate is a pretty pathetic, although accurate, portrayal of the model. It is the same hot chocolate that they would serve you if you ordered it any other time of the year but with one, unwrapped little secret. They drop a starlight mint in there. It's, and I don't mean to offend anyone with this, a pretty "poor person's" mint chocolate.

Now I am quite sure that Starbucks uses some fancy syrup to both sweeten and flavor their drink. Whatever they use, it doesn't make the drink taste:
A: Like candy in an otherwise basic drink.
B: Like toothpaste.

These two "nots" together add up to a decent mint hot chocolate. It is strong but not as strong as I like to think that Starbucks drinks are. It's a good, heavy cup of hot chocolate made with more decent ingredients than your powder garbage in the cupboard. I don't know what the Italian name for the twelve-or-so ounce cup I had was, but it was about the maximum I could have taken. I love chocolate and I love hot chocolate but add mint in there and it cuts my kid-like ability to eat endless amounts of chocolate down significantly. It was, while it lasted, a very good drink, though. Now I didn't buy it but I'm sure that I would not have been fully comfortable at whatever the purchase price was but hey, I don't make a lot of money and therefore will buy many more "poor person" renditions of drinks than someone in tax brackets above mine will. Jay and I live well beneath our means and that includes frivolous purchases like five-dollar small hot chocolates. I downright don't think I'm worth it but that's my own internal struggle I've got to deal with.

Website
http://www.starbucks.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Not Listed
Categories
Milk
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on November 17th, 2013
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Starbucks Frappuccino Hazelnut

Starbucks Frappuccino Hazelnut

Someday I will find a hazelnut and eat it. Will it taste like chocolate? Probably not. Will it taste like a nut? Probably. It will probably come in a shell that I cannot crack so I will end up putting it on the ground and stepping on it or hitting it with a rock like some sort of caveman. These actions will most defiantly crush the insides and I will have to climb a tree to get another one. Do they come from trees? Probably, right? I am hordiculturally an idiot.

Does this drink taste like Nutella? You know you're asking because anytime I read "hazelnut" I think of Nutella and why wouldn't I? It's a wonderful thing. So does it? Eh, not really. There is enough coffee taste in there that it's not like a liquefied spread. If you want to think of this as a mocha, you would be pretty much right. I might be able to tell the difference if I had them side by side but since I'm not made of money nor do I feel the need to drink two Frappuccinos back to back like some sort of ignorant college student who's cramming for an eight o'clock economics 101 final. For that reason I will say that this tastes like a chocolaty, caramelly, coffee drink that is very cold. It’s like an adult Slurpee. Starbucks, if you want to use that internally, you can. All I ask is that you give me some sort of royalties. A drink a week? You can afford that. I can call the shots here. I'm in the driver seat and I know what I'm doing.

Website
http://www.starbucks.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Not Listed
Categories
Coffee
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on September 25th, 2013
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Central Coast Brewing Old Fashioned Root Beer

Central Coast Brewing Old Fashioned Root Beer

I'm on tour right now and the band I'm with just played at Slo Brew in San Luis Obispo, CA with Titus Andronicus. People got us excited about this venue because it's also a restaurant and they feed all bands that play here. All the band members were asked what they wanted but they didn't think to ask me, the merch guy.

Then my good friend Max Gregor came to the rescue and bought me a slice of pizza and this huge bottle of root beer. I was totally surprised and it made my night. The pizza was as good as I was going to get in California, but the root beer was pretty decent. It's a local brewing company and you can tell this isn't their first batch of root beer. It has a nice sweetness, but not too sweet. It's a very "safe" root beer and would be a good introductory to someone new to root beer outside of Barqs and Dad's.

Website
http://www.centralcoastbrewing.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Not Listed
Categories
Root Beer, Soda Pop
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Derek Neuland on September 11th, 2013
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Super C Sleep Key Lime Mint

Super C Sleep Key Lime Mint

The long of it:
Order yourself a nice key lime pie to go. Then take a pit stop to Gotham and get yourself a scoop of that toxic sludge that transformed the Joker in Tim Burton’s first Batman movie. Blend that together with your pie, and then set up some bunsen burners and a little torch to evaporate any liquid that might be left in the concoction you made. Take the crust that is left and crush it up into a fine powder to add to your drinks when you want to pretend that you will sleep.

The short(er) of it:
This tastes like liquid key lime pie that someone spilled toxic waste on, and it didn’t work for me. I got home around 2am and immediately took this to ensure I would be able to fall asleep quickly (I know it says to drink a half hour before sleep). Come six am I was still awake. Gross and ineffective.

Website
http://www.drinksuperc.com/sleep/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Not Listed
Categories
Mix/Concentrate, Relaxation
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on September 2nd, 2013
Comments
View and Leave A Comment
Buy Now
Super C- Sleep - Vitamin & Mineral Drink Mix -key Lime Mint: 7 Count box (Pack of 4)

Tim Horton's Iced Cappuccino Chocolate Hazelnut

Tim Horton's Iced Cappuccino Chocolate Hazelnut

Who doesn't love Nutella? I heard the German's love it. I would like to hear from the source that this is true but when my brother went to Germany he told me that they sold it all over the place and had cereal with Nutella in it. That to me sounds like a dream come true. For that reason, I was pretty stoked when I heard Tim Horton's had a chocolate hazelnut iced cappuccino.

The last couple that I have reviewed have been a bit lackluster. I don't know what it was whether it was a mistake in the mix or something else but they have been less than stellar to say the least. This, although ordered as a regular and delivered as a supreme was pretty good. Not completely on par with Nutella, but along the same path. With the super thick, chocolate whipped cream, it made the drink pretty smooth and thicker than a regular iced cappuccino. There was so much chocolate that it just tasted like I was drinking chocolate milk and I am not totally alright with that. I would have enjoyed a little coffee flava rather than a barrage, albeit delicious, of chocolate thunderstorm.

Ratios people. Math and ratios can save all the drinks, and you said you would never use it. Y'all are idiots. Not use math, seriously? Learn a book, why don't'cha?

Website
http://www.timhortons.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Not Listed
Categories
Coffee
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on August 2nd, 2013
Comments
View and Leave A Comment
| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 |