Sucralose (292 reviews)

Power Crunch Blast Double Chocolate

Power Crunch Blast Double Chocolate

Dear readers, I was certainly not ready for today. Not ready at all. You see I go to the gym three times a week, and I have my little routine I do. It’s a solitary thing that I do whilst listening to the Jen Kirkman and Julie Klausner podcasts. I’ve been doing it for probably about two years now. I saw the results I wanted early on, and now I’m just kind of maintaining that. Being a gentleman of 35 years I can no longer eat what I want all the time and just let my metabolism do its thing. It’s fine, I actually enjoy it. Well today I ran into a friend there who is into weight lifting and I joined him and his cohort in their routine. I kept up way better than I expected and I was proud of myself. I felt worn out but good as I left the gym. It’s now about two hours later and I am destroyed. It takes effort to lift my arms over my head. Tomorrow is not going to be a fun day, and I see myself getting zero work done at the print shop. It’s going to be a nightmare. Seriously we did more/different exercises than I’m used to, but I didn’t it were that crazy.

As things would have it, we recently received a box of these protein drinks in the mail, so what better time to down one then now? Power Crunch, who is known for their protein bars, has expanded their reach into ready to drink shakes. They’ve done something with these shakes that I have never come across before. It has 20g of protein in it, but it doesn’t have the thick, grittiness to it that every other protein shake has. I shook the hell out of the bottle and the first sip was pretty close to what I would expect, but after that it’s consistency was closer to water than anything else. It was strange, but nice for those of us who get a little skeeved out by the grit.

I don’t know where the double chocolate comes into play here as all I see is cocoa on the ingredients list, but the chocolate flavor is does has is nice. It tastes like it was made from a decent bar of the good dark stuff, and not some garbage low grade filth that most chocolate drinks use. In fact the only downfall of this drink was that it was flavored with sucralose, but its inclusion is completely understandable, as this is for when you work out, and who wants to be downing real sugar then?

Okay, now I have to drag myself to band practice and hope I have the strength to play my bass. I’m such a child.

Website
http://powercrunch.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Sports/Dietary Supplement
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on July 30th, 2014
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BioNutritional Research Group - Power Crunch Blast Double Chocolate, 12 drinks

Cumberland Farms Sparkling Sno Lemon-ade

Cumberland Farms Sparkling Sno Lemon-ade

It should be a crime against nature. It should be an ultimate evil. Artificial sugar combining with lemonade should be akin to the raising of the antichrist, but for some reason I don’t mind it. Does that mean I’ve gone to the dark side? Do I need to start having rituals with some sort of sacrifice? Do I need to shave my head and grow a goatee? You know what? Why not?

This is a sparkling lemon drink that is in fact sweetened with sucralose, but it doesn’t taste like poison and I don’t feel like all humanity should be slaughtered because real sugar wasn’t used in making lemonade. I still feel dirty that I enjoy this, but I’m not going to deny myself. Sure it tastes diet, but the lemon does a good job covering it up.

This is better than I ever could have imagined it to be, but at the same time it’s not something I would crave. I would happily drink it if it were presented to me, but I wouldn’t chug-a-lug all day long on the stuff, which is probably for the best.

Website
http://www.cumberlandfarms.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Lemonade, Sparkling
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on July 24th, 2014
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Sparkling Ice Crisp Apple

Sparkling Ice Crisp Apple

We're a couple months out from "Apple Mania" but that doesn't mean that we can't still enjoy apples. I remember watching a video a couple months back where people were making "fizzy fruit" by soaking them in dry ice. Where do you get dry ice? Are only scientists and friends and family of scientists allowed to eat a fizzy apple? That's unfair.

Well, one scientist broke the silence and now we, the public, can enjoy (probably) what a sparkling apple tastes like. Sure, the only crispness is in the title, but that's cool. Don't worry about it. Drink an apple. Yeah, drink an apple. Eating apples is so two thousand and late. Yeah, I did it. What? It was fitting.

Apples are great. This, you know what? This isn't bad. It's no apple but it's more quenching. It doesn't taste diet. It doesn't taste like candy. It doesn't taste like a shoe, but then again, why would it? If you eat an apple that tastes like a shoe, I don't know the policy of your local grocer, but you should return that batch and maybe shop elsewhere. It's sweet like an apple. Tastes like an apple. Great work, guys. You captured apples and fizzed up that essence. Yeah, sure, sparkling apple juice exists, already. This is more like a real apple.

Website
http://www.sparklingice.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on July 19th, 2014
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Sparkling Ice, Crisp Apple, 17 Ounce (Pack of 12)

Fuze Slenderize Blueberry Raspberry

Fuze Slenderize Blueberry Raspberry

Hey buddy, even though you look completely worn out, why don’t you pop on over to the fuse box and open it up and see if you can figure out why the lights are working? I’m just kidding you brother, I just have the switch turned off. I’m trying to toughen up my eyes by reading in the dark. With the appending apocalypse you gotta be ready and you can bet your sweet ass that within two years electricity won’t exist. I don’t want to be that fool that can’t read anything in the dark when that comes to pass. Seriously though check out the fuse box and get yourself one. Oh I’m sorry, I call my fridge the fuse box, because m I don’t want to be that fool that can’t read anything in the dark when that comes to pass. Seriously though check out the fuse box and get yourself one. Oh I’m sorry, I call my fridge the fuse box, because my mom keeps it stocked with Fuze drinks. She’s been raggin’ me about how I need to lose weight so she buys me the low calorie “Slenderize” ones. I don’t know what she’s talking about. These three bills will help me to stay alive at the end of the world. While all you skinny folks are withering away I’ll be eating my own fat and prospering.

Oh man, you should have grabbed the blueberry raspberry one. It’s actually got a bunch of juices in it. Okay it’s mostly apple juice, but there are a bunch of other fruit and vegetable juices in it, even though they make up less than .5% of the ingredients. It tastes like a berry drink that is heavy on the blueberries, but the sucralose in it gives it a weird taste. It doesn’t taste overly diet, but it’s done something to the juice that makes it taste a bit off. Everything mixed together gives you a bunch of vitamins and minerals. It’s pretty rad. I know my mom just thinks I’m fat, so she buys it because of the low sugar content ,but all that Super Citrimax and Chromium in my system is really going to come in handy when the world…well you know where this is going. Prepare yourself brother!

Website
http://www.drinkfuze.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Juice, Sports/Dietary Supplement
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on July 17th, 2014
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Fuze Slenderize Blueberry Raspberry, 16.9-Ounce Bottles (Pack of 12)

Vemma Verve! Zero Sugar

Vemma Verve! Zero Sugar

The poet Rick Ross once said, "Everyday I'm hustlin'." These past few weeks I have been doing just that. Straight hustlin'. Work all day, come home and work all night. Late into the night. Too late. It's catching up with me. I can feel it in my throat. It's my body's way of saying, "Calm down, bro. Get some sleep. You can work tomorrow." Well, I didn't listen to that guy last night and went deep into the night and now my body is in shambles. What better way to fix it than with a diet energy drink? Now I can not only be energized but svelte as well.

This didn't taste like a trillion Skittles, which is my initial litmus test for energy drinks. It didn't taste bad at all, as a matter of fact. It was citric but I couldn't really place it: Pineapple, some other stuff that may or may not be fruit, and of course their cornerstone mangosteen. It didn't taste like a cliché energy drink, which was a relief and it also did not taste "diet" so that's a double win. If you're keeping track, that's a veritable handful of wins. It’s a small handful of wins but a handful nonetheless.

Website
http://www.vemma.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on July 10th, 2014
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Cumberland Farms Sparkling Sno Pomegranate Raspberry

Cumberland Farms Sparkling Sno Pomegranate Raspberry

I know what snow looks like. I don't remember what the rapper Snow looks like. That's not to say that (almost) local celebrity Snow isn't memorable, it's just that it's not in the forefront of my memory. Sure, he's from Toronto and Jay and I used to take monthly trips up there but our paths never met up. I wonder what would have happened if they did. If we went for a dance party and ran into Snow while eating hot dogs on the corner of Queen and Spadina, who knows what would have ensued. I'm going say that it's been a long time since Toronto has given Snow the "star treatment" so it might be like backstage passes to a reggae show or something nice but local. I bet he could get us free drinks but since we don't drink, he would, naturally, get us drinks that are in his nomenclature so we would only be drinking Sparkling Sno.

Now I'm sure he's a good guy but I wonder how Jay and I would deal with the fact that the drink he just gave us is pretty gross. "Look Snow, it's been a really good time and you're a cooler dude than I thought you were going to be, but we've got to be honest since you're being so cool with us. This drink...do we look like we're on a diet? We're not exactly chiseled but this...this is diet. It doesn't particularly taste like pomegranate but might, if we're pushing it, might have had a hint of raspberry in it. We understand that you probably don't want us around anymore. It's not that we don't appreciate your generosity. We really do. We just have to be honest with our faithful fans."

That could go one of two ways. Number one is that Snow would say, "Tank you for da honesty but I've gotta tell ya ta leave." or he could say, "Me boys. Tanks for da honesty. Ya can come into da private VIP section. I was just testin' yas. Help yourselves to anyting ya want. It's on me." Man I hope it would be the latter.

Website
http://www.cumberlandfarms.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Sparkling
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on June 29th, 2014
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Cumberland Farms Sparkling Sno Strawberry Kiwi

Cumberland Farms Sparkling Sno Strawberry Kiwi

Things have just gone too far. I don’t know who originally started associating zero calorie sparkling beverages with ice and all things frozen, but as good of a marketing plan that was other companies have beaten it to death. Yes they tend to taste crisp and cool, so the original idea makes sense. The thing is that ice is not the first thing that a brain would think of hen drinking these types of beverages without the names being forced upon them. I don’t hate these drinks by any means, but for the love of all that is good in the world, please come up with your own ideas and stop copying another companies marketing scheme.

Cumberland Farms happily sent us these samples, so I feel a bit bad for ragging on them, but it drives me crazy. Luckily their beverages aren’t that bad. Like all good beverages of this ilk this is crisp and refreshing. They chose to sweeten it with sucralose instead of the stevia blends that a lot of the other companies are using these days. That concerned me at first, but luckily the flavor didn’t suffer for that decision. This is clearly a diet drink, but it doesn’t have that terrible 80’s diet taste that most sucralose drinks force upon the imbiber.

My brain automatically associates the strawberry kiwi flavor with diet beverages. My mom and sister always drank gross zero calorie drinks with that flavor, and I always wanted a real sugar version, because it sounded like a wonderful combination. Once I finally tasted a fully sweetened beverage of that sought after flavor it was far too sweet and seemed to be for children. So diet it remains in my mind. I can’t really say that this tastes like those two fruits, but it does taste exactly how I would expect it to, as its predecessors have.

A thing that I should have mentioned earlier is that unlike its contemporaries, Cumberland Farms combined the classic zero calorie sparkling beverage with a Vitamin Water style beverage. They enhanced their recipe with vitamins and antioxidants. So to sum things up, they somehow created a sucralose sweetened drink that doesn’t taste like complete poison. They also had the sense to use some fruit juice in it and not artificial flavors. On top of all that they added a bunch of ingredients to make sure people get essential vitamins that might be lacking in their diet. It’s certainly not my favorite drink out there, but it’s doing okay for itself.

Website
http://www.cumberlandfarms.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Sparkling
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on June 29th, 2014
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Sparkling Ice Peach Nectarine

Sparkling Ice Peach Nectarine

There are so many companies out there nowadays putting out zero calories flavored sparkling waters. Want to know a secret? Most of them blow. Their flavors are weak and they are so overly diet that I can’t handle it. Sparkling Ice stands out in this crowd, and by stands out I mean they make a palatable drink that is fairly average in the overall scheme of things, but supreme in its specific category.

Even though it’s just supposed to be sparkling water they are not afraid to make their flavors bold. In fact they actually add a splash of real juice for their flavoring instead of artificial garbage that tastes more like chemicals than anything else. This has a strong peach taste to it, and yes there is a bit of nectarine in there as well, which in reality is just a smooth skinned peach.

This is one of the few drinks that are sweetened using sucralose that I can actually stomach. They have found a way for the peach flavor to hide the sucralose poison. I would like to know exactly how they do it, but a good magician never reveals their secrets, so I’m sure mums the word.

Website
http://www.sparklingice.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Sparkling, Water
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on June 19th, 2014
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Sparkling Ice Peach Nectarine, 17 Ounce (Pack of 12)

Cascade Ice Peach Mango

Cascade Ice Peach Mango

Something about this seems like I shouldn't be drinking it. It's too sharp and I feel like it got a small composition of poison. It's probably one of the worst Cascade Ice drinks I've had and only slightly tastes like both peach and mango. I guess "some" is better than a lot of drinks but I cannot escape the fact that danger runs through my gullet with every sip. In small sips, it tastes very sweet, very diet and you don't get the uber-sharp, cutting sensation. Take a gulp and you wish you had written a will. With every gulp I winced some I just got a mystery shot in the arm from a sneaky doctor that just likes "practicing" on unsuspecting patients. I don't like him, I don't like shots, and I don't particularly enjoy this drink.

Website
http://www.cascadeicewater.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Sparkling, Water
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on June 19th, 2014
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Cascade Ice Sparkling Water, Peach Mango, 17.2 Ounce (Pack of 12)

Cascade Ice Coconut

Cascade Ice Coconut

We've come a long way, coconut. From the days of only eating them by way of Mounds candy bars through the coconut shavings on ice cream and now coconut flour and coconut cream pie; Quite a versatile man. Now sure, in liquid form you're better cold but this drink was room temperature and it was pretty great.

It was a little sweet but don't let the "0 Calories" tag discourage you because this is fantastic and doesn't taste diet at all. It also does not taste like coconut water or a coconut milk. It's more a water with coconut flavoring than a coconut base. It tastes like a liquid, fizzy version of a candied coconut. This makes me want to buy a giant bag of dried, candied coconut and just house the whole thing. No sharing. No way. No how. All mine. I'll eat coconut and drink this sparkling coconut water and no one bother me.

Website
http://www.cascadeicewater.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Coconut, Diet, Sparkling
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on June 9th, 2014
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