Cactus Water (4 reviews)

Green-Go Cactus Water Hint of Lemon

Green-Go Cactus Water Hint of Lemon

So after saying the name of this beverage several times aloud to a friend they still thought that I was saying it was called Gringo and not Green-Go. Was that an intentional marketing plan? Perhaps it was an inside joke, you know a play on how the white people who live in the suburbs of America won’t shut up about how such and such restaurant is completely authentic Mexican, when in reality it’s like an Applebees that serves tacos. Those same people probably will never step into the hole in the wall taquerias that look filthy, but taste amazing, serving things such as nopal. In case you didn’t know nopal is cactus and it is what is used to make this beverage. The folks at Green-Go puree the paddles of the nopal cactus into a beverage that is ridiculously refreshing. Think of it as coconut water’s long lost cousin. When I describe what cooked nopal tastes like to people I always say it’s like a cross between green beans and green peppers. This tastes nothing like that, thankfully…I think? This tastes kind of like unsweetened aloe vera, but you know without being overbearing and resembling poison. It tastes plantlike, but it is very mild. It’s the kind of flavor that grows on you the more you drink, and you will want to drink a lot when you see how hydrated it makes you feel. Take it from this gringo.

Website
http://https://drinkgreen-go.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Other/Weird, Water
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on July 12th, 2018
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Steaz Cactus Water With Green Tea

Steaz Cactus Water With Green Tea

I think I speak for all people when I say that prickly pear is a wonderful fruit. Pears blow but add some spikes and thorns and nails and it flips it right around. Make a pear dangerous to eat and it makes it better than its soft, smooth brother. Or cousin. They're related but maybe just through marriage. It counts but barely.

This is wonderful. The green tea isn't powerful but you can taste a little bite. The prickly pear, though, she shines through with beams of light as bright as the G.D. sun. It's a soft flavored drink. Real sugar and a little bit of Stevia come together and really round this little guy out.

This rarely happens, but I finished the drink before I finished writing this review. I'm on the top of the third paragraph and it's gone. I've polished off twelve ounces in like 100 words. This is great. It's not terrible for you, either. At fifty calories per can, I'd easily take a tallboy of this any day of the week. You hear me, Steaz? Tallboys. I'm inventing the demand as I type. Everyone who reads my words is seeing it in my head wondering if it exists. Make it exist. Do the right thing, Steaz. Do the right thing.

Website
http://www.steaz.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Categories
Water
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on May 25th, 2016
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Steaz Cactus Water With Cucumber & Green Tea

Steaz Cactus Water With Cucumber & Green Tea

Are you aware that the desert is a dead, dry place with no hope? Did you also know that cucumbers are the most refreshing thing this world has ever seen? If only cucumbers grew in the desert maybe life would exist. Because you know, nothing lives in the desert…oh wait; a lot of things live in the desert. That doesn’t mean that they wouldn’t lead richer lives if cucumber was a normal part of life for them. Steaz has taken that refreshing vegetable and combined it with prickly pear (the fruit on a cactus) as well as some green tea and the results are quite nice. The prickly pear is nice and sweet, but it allows the cucumber to cut through and give you that relief you so desperately crave. The only downside to this at all is that they tried to cut down on calories by using stevia along with cane sugar. It’s not horrible, but you can tell it’s there, which I would prefer it wasn’t. Other than that there is nothing but smooth sailing with this drink. Go ahead and drop me off in a remote desert location hundreds of miles from anywhere. As long as I had a couple cans of this I would be just fine, or dead. Fine or dead, one or the other.

Website
http://www.steaz.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea, Other/Weird
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on April 11th, 2016
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Steaz Cactus Water With Starfruit & Green Tea

Steaz Cactus Water With Starfruit & Green Tea

I know that to everyone out there it sounds like being a part of Thirsty Dudes is a nonstop party. I mean sure, Mike and I have abandoned our families and live in a giant penthouse in the fanciest of buildings downtown. Sure, we race motorcycles everywhere we go, including both the public and private elevators to our penthouse. You know how some nicer fridges have a filtered water tap built into the door? Ours dispenses ice cold sarsaparilla. We have an entire freezer that is filled with nothing but green tea ice cream mochi. That doesn’t make us any different than you our mild mannered readers. We still ride our prototype hoverboards one push at a time just like you. We are still humbled when companies send us advance flavors before they hit the market. Actually, that makes us feel pretty special. It’s not the millions of dollars we have made from reviewing these drinks that fill us with a sense of pride, it’s the little things like this.

When a package arrived the other day of the three flavors of the new Steaz cactus water line, I was pumped. You know pumped like when I ride the zip line down from our penthouse to the hot dog cart a few blocks away. I couldn’t wait to review it and help get the word out on a product I was sure was going to be fantastic. The problem was that I was completely incapacitated from the flu. I didn’t leave the couch, except to crawl to the rest room for about 72 hours. I thought it was the end of my life of luxury and leisure. As it does, time passed and my health returned and here I am enjoying a can of starfruit and green tea cactus water, even if it is a few days later that I would have liked it to be.

It was worth the wait folks. This is delicious. Cactus water is basically nature’s version of Gatorade and it is far superior to what has been dumped on coach’s heads for decades. It is high in antioxidants, reduces inflammation and is just chock full of electrolytes. This is sweet, smooth, and fruity. The green tea tastes is only vaguely there in the aftertaste, but the starfruit is right up front with the sweetness of the cactus water. There is some stevia in the mix as well, but I wouldn’t really have guessed that from the taste, which is a sign of proper use of any zero calorie sweetener. Steaz has not disappointed.

I wonder how many cans of this it would take to fill one of those Gatorade coolers. I’ll need to use the power of science to figure that out so I can be prepared for our next air hockey tournament up in the loft. I’m going to destroy Mike and then have the butler dump this on me when I win. Just like the champ I am.

Website
http://www.steaz.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea, Other/Weird
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on March 16th, 2016
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