Perform 02 (11 reviews)
Gatorade Perform 02 A.M. Tropical Mango
Who knows what one does in their sleep? Perhaps you are a werewolf and without even knowing you transform into a wild beast and cause havoc throughout your town. Maybe you sleep-mallwalk with a bunch of geriatrics that wake up at 3am. Some people have night terrors of game show blunders past that cause them to be restless. Or perhaps it’s simply the time when you think you are a Viking. If any of those things are true of you, then you certainly wake up with a loss of fluids and a lack of electrolytes in your system.
The only rational solution to these problems is to grab an oversized bottle of sugary beverage and down it as soon as you wake up. I mean staying healthy is a must and you’ll be damned if nighttime you is going to ruin the rest of your day. So chug my friend, chug!
Guess what this tastes like? That’s right it has the same sodium base as every other flavor of Gatorade. Not a bad thing at all. I like when drinks have a specific taste through out their entire product line so that you can spot them in blind taste tests. It’s a taste America has known and love for decades. This version they went a little tropical with the taste. There may not be any mango listed on the ingredients, but it tastes enough like the fruit that you don’t feel cheated. It is way sweeter than anything I would typically want to drink in the morning, but I’m not an athlete, a werewolf or have grandeurs of sailing the seven seas plundering villages. I’m just a Thirsty Dude, who thinks this tastes just fine, but I wouldn’t drink it in the morning….okay it’s 9am right now, but I drank 90% of this yesterday. I’m just finishing it off to get a taste for the review.
- Website
- http://www.gatorade.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucrose
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper 3 weeks, 5 days ago
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Gatorade Perform 02 Fierce Melon
Can someone look back at the Truman Show-esque tapes of my life and tell me exactly what happened to make me such a fool for melon? When I was younger I never disliked melon, but I always thought of it as just there. In fruit salad it was the filler. One of the greatest Simpsons’ quotes is about how cantaloupe doesn’t matter when it comes to honey dew. I don’t think a good laugh is enough to change my taste buds though. It remains a mystery, but I love melon these days.
For years I have been talking about how all I want is a bottle of cantaloupe juice. Think of how amazing that would be. It would be so damn flavorful. The last place I expected to get a little fix for my urge would be in a bottle of Gatorade. While this is a far cry from a glass of actual melon juice, it does taste enough like a mix of cantaloupe and honey dew to satisfy me until science comes through for me. It mostly has that general Gatorade flavor, with notes of said melons. This is the kind of Gatorade I would drink at an early morning sports practice. Remember that dumb summer when I decided to join the school football team and had to waste my vacation getting up way to early? You don’t? Well looks like you should rewind those tapes of my life a bit further. I forced a fumble once that won us a game. That play probably consisted of 75% of the game time I actually got. Go make some popcorn, you’re in for a wild ride.
- Website
- http://www.gatorade.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucrose
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 2/25/2013
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Gatorade Perform 02 Strawberry Watermelon
This is little sister Gatorade. I don’t mean that in a sexist, “everything that is pink is for little girls” way. I mean it in the “my little sister was obsessed with strawberry watermelon drinks when we were younger” kind of way. I guess I shouldn’t really call her my little sister anymore as she’s about to turn 30 and get married on the same day, but who cares? She loved drinks like this and because she was my younger sibling and there are always some sort of rivalries, I could never take the flavor seriously. Even now that we’re both adults I see this as a kids drink.
In reality it tastes nothing like the result of juicing a bunch of strawberries and watermelons. It tastes pink, if pink were an actual flavor. There are the slightest hints at a strawberry-esque flavor, but it doesn’t really taste like the fruit. To keep my theme going I will say it tastes the same way that Strawberry Shortcake’s breath smelled. Even after all of that, and putting my childish rivalries aside, it’s still a decent drink. Not all drinks should taste like fruit. I’m sure it does a fine job of hydrating and quenching thirst and isn’t that all they ever really claimed to do at Gatorade HQ? It’s sweet, it’s watery and my sister would love it.
- Website
- http://www.gatorade.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucrose
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 6/29/2012
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Gatorade Perform 02 Fruit Punch
I was about to say that his is where sports drinks began, but then a quick internet search and I discovered that Lemon Lime was the original Gatorade flavor in 1965. Can you believe that this stuff has been around for so long? I wonder how different the original drink was to the ones that are readily available today.
While this may not have been the original, it certainly was the first I ever had. I used to go with my cousin to his soccer games in some strange sports complex. The concession stand there sold Gatorade and that’s all I ever got. It made me feel like an athlete even though I wasn’t playing. I was also probably five at the time and an idiot. I should have just been playing instead of sitting in the stands like a fool. Whatever. This is the flavor I always got, fruit punch. I’m sure this is an altered version of it, but it still tastes like slightly watered down Hawiian Punch. I’m glad that the company has gotten back off of the HFCS sweetener and gone with sucrose. The drink is way less syrupy this way.
I think as a rule no one should ever need to drink fruit punch (unless it actually is just a bunch of different fruit juices mixed together with no sweetener added), but if you find yourself craving it, I would choose this over its competitors. It’s not so overpoweringly strong.
- Website
- http://www.gatorade.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucrose
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 5/5/2012
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Gatorade Perform 02 Frost Glacier Freeze
In the 25 years that I lived at home our fridge always had a jug of "blue juice" in it. Yes that's right I didn't move out of my mom's house until I was 25. Sure I could have gotten my own place much sooner, but I was on tour a lot and paying for an apartment when I was gone for a good chunk of time seemed stupid (I did pay my mom rent for the time I was in Buffalo). My living situation isn’t the important aspect of this story, the “blue juice” is. That neon fluid was two packets of Kool Aid’s Sharkleberry Fin (or whatever the name of that flavor was at the time) and way too much sugar. Our house was famous for this drink, and if we were ever out and my friends went to get a glass there was certainly a minor scene. This may seem like a pointless story, but it is relevant because this drink tastes like Gatorade’s version of blue juice. Sure, it has a lot less sugar and that very specific Gatorade taste to it, but the base is all Sharkleberry Fin. I rarely drink Gatorade, but the flavor of this brings me back to a better time before rent and bills were an issue. A time where my friends and I had more of a claim to my family’s house than my mom did. Strange times.
- Website
- http://www.gatorade.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucrose
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 1/25/2012
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Gatorade Perform 02 Rain Lime
When I feel myself getting sick, like if I wake up with a sore throat, cough, or the like, I have two "Go-To" fixes. One is to buy a small carton of orange juice and slam it in one day, spinning my body into a scurvy-free, urinating ball of vitamin C. The other one, which I use less, is to drink Gatorade. Any flavor would have been better than this, though, because it's rank, and no, not like The Smith's record.
Oh this is lime, but it's got a certain...undesirable viscosity. It is from the carbo-loading qualities of the "02 Perform" line. If I were training for a marathon and wanted to skip on my eleventh spaghetti and potato meal of the day, I would slam this as fast as my gullet would approve because even then, I wouldn't want it. I guess as far as carb drinks go, this is pretty good as it actually tastes like lime and your mouth is already used to the thickness of it. For people like me who don't work out and just skip meals while blaming it on my kid taking up all my time but really it's because a Subway foot-long sub the way I like it is upwards of the worst thing one can eat, I just want a simple Gatorade. This loses the superior drinkability that I like about Gatorade. Taste-wise though; consider the mark missed.
- Website
- http://www.gatorade.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucrose
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 1/4/2012
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Gatorade Perform 02 Rain Berry
Somewhere in the sands of the Sahara there is a paradise-esque oasis. It is only 30ft x 30ft, but that 900 square foot patch is considered by many to be heaven. It is extremely treacherous to journey to the area that locals call Gondelavisti, but it is said that anyone who completes the journey never returns the same person. It is in this are that the ever-elusive rain berry grows. A common misconception is that the rain berry grows in tropical rainforests. Nothing could be further from the truth. The fact of the matter is the rain berry is what causes the desert. The plant sucks up all of the moisture from the ground leaving everything for miles around cracked and dusty. Honestly without the rain berry deserts would not exist on this world. Luckily it is not an invasive plant of Earth would be the opposite of Water World.
The other side of this coin is that a single berry contains so much water and electrolytes that it could quench the thirst of an entire village that has withstood a 20-year drought. It seems that Gatorade has made its way to Gondelavisti and returned with a supply of rain berries, which they have used in their line of sports drinks. It is very light and absolutely refreshing. The rain berry tastes like a mix between grapes and strawberries. I appreciate that it isn't as syrupy as the original Gatorade line. I've heard that they only use one rain berry for every ten batches of this stuff that they make. That's how insane those berries actually are.
- Website
- http://www.gatorade.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucrose
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 7/24/2011
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Gatorade Perform 02 Watermelon Citrus
Dear companies that produce watermelon flavored drinks,
I wholeheartedly believe that most of you have never tasted the juice of a watermelon. In fact I'd wager that 50% of you have never even been in the same room as the mighty fruit. I believe this because you're drinks taste nothing like actual watermelon. It's like sometime in the 90's Jolly Rancher came up with a flavor of candy that they decided to call watermelon and every drink company since then has assumed that is what watermelon tastes like out in the wild. Yes the wild. Apparently you also didn't know that watermelons only grow in the most distant valleys of the rainforest, protected by an army of deadly half snake half woman. Yes there are three halves. They are that dangerous.
Please take note and order yourself an actual watermelon for your scientists to mimic. I mean this is perfectly fine, but it tastes like candy, not like a fruit and I really, really wanted this to taste like the fruit.
- Website
- http://www.gatorade.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucrose
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 7/6/2011
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Gatorade Perform 02 Lime Cucumber
It's 90 degrees out and you're exhausted. Not only that, but you're also drenched in sweat from playing basketball with the neighborhood kids. Sure their average age is 13, but that didn't stop you from dunkin' on them left and right. After you scored 27 points they told you that you were a prick and took their ball home with them. Maybe you were a bit harsh on them, but if you're not how else are they going to learn to try harder? Also, you looked super rad doing those windmill dunks. You looked exactly like that MJ silhouette. Good thing Johnny next door has one of those hoops that you can adjust the height on. There's no way you would have been able to do that on a regulation net.
Now you're home and the AC is kicking in your pad. You're "old lady" said she has just the drink for you. She presents this Gatorade like it is a holy grail. She says it has cucumber in it, like she uses on her eyes. That way you won't get wrinkles on your insides. What is she crazy? You thinking that watching her stories has finally broke her. Oh well you're completely parched and dehydrated. As soon as you open it smells like you live on a cucumber farm, or more likely that someone used that cucumber melon lotion. You take a big gulp and it's like someone liquefied one cucumber for each sweet dunk you did and put it in some lime Gatorade. That may sound bad in theory, but in practice it's wonderful. It's weird because there is pretty much zero aftertaste with each sip. You crush the whole bottle and go hit the showers. It's a hard life being on top of the food chain.
- Website
- http://www.gatorade.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucrose
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 6/23/2011
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Gatorade Perform 02 Orange
I wasn't planning on drinking this yet. I was going to let it chill in the fridge for a while and maybe in a couple of days I would crack it open. As it turns out as I was about to put it into a fridge I dropped it and caused a leak. Call me Mr. Butterfingers. At least it was just a pinhole in a Gatorade can and not blood spurting everywhere due to clumsiness. Forced drinking of beverages here we come!
Derek denies it, but I've always thought that the name Thirsty Dudes came from the Mitch Hedberg joke about this very product. To paraphrase you don't have to be all sweaty from playing basketball to enjoy Gatorade. You can just be a Thirsty Dude. To be honest though I never think of drinking a Gatorade unless I'm playing some sort of sport and even then it's rarely what I reach for.
When I was younger I drank it all the time. Then other companies started popping up doing the same general idea but better. Gatorade always seemed so thick and syrupy to me. I don't know if they just changed branding or if they changed the ingredients, but this isn't as bad as I remember. The flavor is somewhere in the middle between orange juice and orange drink. It's also seems way thinner. It's not something that I think I would ever purchase on my own, but if someone offered it to me I wouldn't deny it.
- Website
- http://www.gatorade.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucrose
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 6/22/2011
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