Mike Literman (1706 reviews)

Mike loves new drinks. He's drank some gross stuff in his day, and this blog is making him drink even more against his will. That being said, he wouldn't trade it in for the world. He loves new beverages and is always, and always will be, on a quest for something new.

Benner Tea Co. Chai

Benner Tea Co. Chai

Chai. I got into it too late. It's good and I love a nice spicy, hot tea. This isn't half bad, either. Should I think less of it because it is an Aldi brand? No. It's probably something else branded to look like an Aldi brand, actually.

This had a good, strong anise taste to it mixed with whatever other magic was in here. I promptly drank it and, presumably ruined it, adding a packet of sugar. It was the morning and daddy needed a little pick-me-up.

To whomever I stole this from that works in my office, thanks. I'll pay you back in whatever the equivalent of one bag of tea is. Pretty sure that's a wet T-shirt car wash.

Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Hot Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on January 18th, 2017
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Ikea Dryck Julmust

Ikea Dryck Julmust

This tastes better than it smells. It smells like...listen...I'll be honest with you. I haven't always been straight edge. Back in the late 90's, it was a difficult time for everyone. I snuck, a bottle of red wine out of my parent's basement over to my friend's and we hid it in the drop ceiling and took sips of it. It was disgusting then. Two, maybe three baby sips. Tops. This smelled like that but sweeter.

How did it taste? Not that much better but good enough that I drank a fair amount of this bottle. It tastes like the fruity part of wine mixed in with a can of Pepsi. It had a bit of a burn to it which was probably from "Christmas spices." It did taste like it could have been alcoholic. It wasn't but if you pulled the wool over my eyes and told me a week later, I wouldn't call you a liar. I'd call you a jerk and probably puke on your car, but I would have had my hunches the entire time.

Website
http://www.ikea.com
Country
Sweden
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Soda Pop
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on January 18th, 2017
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Pearl Soda Company Soda Syrup Blue Mountain Sunshine (Black Tea + Lemon)

Pearl Soda Company Soda Syrup Blue Mountain Sunshine (Black Tea + Lemon)

Is this the long lost Arnold Palmer pop? Kind of. In its most core sense it is until you realize that some time and love went into crafting this syrup. Taken directly from their website:

Bold, black tea from India the Nilgiri Blue Mountains of India blended with lemongrass and lemon myrtle

That's not messing around, man. That's not some garbage, every day black tea and some lemon squeezed over a cinder block into a cup. This is real. You can taste that it's different, too. This is not me being a snob, you actually can taste that it's different. It's not "just" anything.

You want to impress someone who likes to drink Half and Half, you buy them a bottle of this. Sure, they've got to have seltzer on hand but it's a small price to pay for such a quality drink.

Website
http://www.pearlsodaco.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Categories
Mix/Concentrate, Soda Pop
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on December 22nd, 2016
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Gatorade Frost Arctic Blitz

Gatorade Frost Arctic Blitz

I seemingly only drink Gatorade when I'm sick. Everyone except me is getting over a gnarly case of the 2016 GI bug. If it hasn't gotten you, it's gotten someone you know and it's a real sonofabitch. I'm just suffering from massive fatigue which is miles better than what everyone else has dealt with.

What does this taste like, though? I don't know. Mystery fruit? Does any Gatorade taste like anything? There might be some arbitrary melon in there but as far as anything I can pinpoint? Nope. "Fruit flavored" and that's as far and as much as I can do. Is it bad? Nope. It's not the best Gatorade I've ever had but it's far from the worst. This went down smooth and I'd like to think it gave me what plants crave, electrolytes. My body is fighting whatever atrocious virus the Western New York region is currently plagued with and I need whatever help I can get. Soup and Gatorade. Help!

Website
http://www.gatorade.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Sports/Dietary Supplement
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on December 21st, 2016
Comments
View and Leave A Comment
Buy Now
https://www.amazon.com/Gatorade-Frost-Arctic-Blitz-Bottle/dp/B01F6FCDPS/ref=sr_1_1_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1482357480&sr=8-1&keywords=gatorade+arctic+blitz

La Croix Passion Fruit

La Croix Passion Fruit

I just got married a month ago (pause for applause) and ate passion fruit for the first time. What a magical experience. What a strange, goopy fruit. It's so weird. I mean, I ate a ton of it but I don't think in a million years I could get my son to eat it. So slimy. It's like all slime and seeds. Strange that anyone would eat it to begin with but they do and it's wonderful.

This drink, sans goop, tastes just like it. I was surprised. La Croix does the flavor justice. I feel like that one is hard to nail. They might use real fruit juice or whatever "essence" is but whatever science they're doing in there, they've pulled in the right people.

Website
http://www.lacroixwater.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Sparkling, Water
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on December 8th, 2016
Comments
View and Leave A Comment
Buy Now

Tim Horton's Iced Coffee Cinnamon Bun

Tim Horton's Iced Coffee Cinnamon Bun

What did I expect? This is just as bad as I thought it would be. It tastes like cheap, powdered cinnamon and fake sweetener. Whether or not it's authentic sugar, who cares? The best sugar couldn't save this drink. I don't think I finished the whole thing and I was tired and I got a small. It was a little coffee flavored but the syrup, my main complaint with Tim's is too thick and strange and throws off the viscosity of the rest of the drink. I want a cinnamon bun writing this and, like I said, I didn't expect much and I was still let down. Shame. Shame.

Website
http://www.timhortons.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Not Listed
Categories
Coffee
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on December 8th, 2016
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Trader Joe's Black Tea Vanilla & Cinnamon

Trader Joe's Black Tea Vanilla & Cinnamon

What is that, a raccoon? Hyper, those raccoons. Them washing all that cotton candy in the stream. Calm down, raccoon. Man. Stop eating all that sugar and drink some of this tea. It's good, subtle and calming. Like chamomile but less on-the-nose. This dude who works here has been sweet enough to let me drink some of his tea and drink it I did. Sure, he's not breaking the bank buying a box of tea from Trader Joe's but who's bringing money into this? No one. He's generous. Let him be.

That raccoon had the right idea with this. Sure he's tangled up in Christmas lights probably doing something he shouldn't be doing but he's at least chilling with a nice, hot cup of tea. The cinnamon is subtle and the vanilla rounds it out. Think of this like the biggest dandelion. You could lift it without even thinking about it. This is like that, as strong as it is, it's still calm and smooth.

Also, for those of you not "in the know," this is the video I am referring to:


Sad, right?

Website
http://www.traderjoes.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Hot Tea
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on November 29th, 2016
Comments
View and Leave A Comment
Buy Now

La Croix Cúrate Melón Pomelo (Cantloupe Pink Grapefruit)

La Croix Cúrate Melón Pomelo (Cantloupe Pink Grapefruit)

What a nice man, Craig is. He always holds the door for people, even if they're half a parking lot away. He's thoughtful. He cares. He's a caring, thoughtful man. Everyone loves Craig. One time he went to a kid’s school and they didn't like him. Why? He brought in a case of melon grapefruit sparkling water. Problem is that kids do not love grapefruit. Every kid there was either crying because it was too "spicy" or they didn't like the taste of grapefruit. Craig meant well. Melon. Kids love melon. So it had grapefruit in it. It didn't have the bitterness of grapefruit, just the flavor. It's sparkling water. What did the kids expect? The kids didn't like Craig and now, Craig didn't like kids. The streak of Craig being nice to everyone had ended all because of a couple snot nosed brats. Great job, kids. You broke Craig.

Website
http://www.lacroixwater.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Sparkling
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on November 21st, 2016
Comments
View and Leave A Comment
Buy Now

La Croix Sparkling Water Mango

La Croix Sparkling Water Mango

Sparkling mango water. My wife might have just found her mecca. She loves La Croix and rightfully so. I mean, it's just sparkling water but it's good stuff. Polar is more than readily available and we buy a fair amount of that. They have some cooler, experimental flavors but she's been hard into this lately.

This is an accurate mango flavor, too. They really nailed it. I'd like to know what sorcery they used to do that. Are sorcery and magic the same thing? Sorcery might involve more potions. I wouldn't say that a witch performs magic. Stirring cauldrons is sorcery. Wizards perform sorcery. Is magic just another word for "illusions?"



The end.

Website
http://www.lacroixwater.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Sparkling
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on November 14th, 2016
Comments
View and Leave A Comment
Buy Now

Apple Rush Sparkling Pomegranate

Apple Rush Sparkling Pomegranate

Back from a long time off on a thing called a "honeymoon" but I'm back and what do I start off with? A sparkling pomegranate joint. It's good, too. I didn't get a lot of apple but the pomegranate was nice and honest and sparkly. It wasn't too sweet and, according to the promises of the company, all that is in this lil' bottle is sweetening this is the fruit juice itself. There are some natural colors from fruit and vegetable and some preservatives but it's good. I would give this to a child. I think that's pretty telling. Sure, I gave my 9 month old half a sugar cookie which he promptly dropped half on the sidewalk and some mini marshmallows yesterday but he was being good and good kids deserve little treats. I might not be the world's best dad but my kids would like me because I gave them sweet treats.

Website
http://www.applerush.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Sparkling
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on October 18th, 2016
Comments
View and Leave A Comment
| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 |