Mike Literman (1706 reviews)

Mike loves new drinks. He's drank some gross stuff in his day, and this blog is making him drink even more against his will. That being said, he wouldn't trade it in for the world. He loves new beverages and is always, and always will be, on a quest for something new.

Pure Leaf Tea House Collection Black Tea with a hint of Wild Blackberry & Sage

Pure Leaf Tea House Collection Black Tea with a hint of Wild Blackberry & Sage

You know what happens when you use good ingredients? You get a great tea at any temperature. Temperature?! Why are you mentioning temperature? Well it's because I didn't finish this yesterday and came back today to polish it off and review it. It was better today than it was yesterday. This uses real sugar and not corn syrup so after fourteen hours, it was not a syrupy mess. When it was cold, the temperature kind of made things different than today when it's neat I could taste the blackberry and the hint of sage. It was very nice, too. It was fruity and you could tell there was something. Not specifically sage but "something" herbal.

I think I'm going to have to befriend a bodega employee to sell me back stock so that it's warm. I think I'm going to have to befriend a bodega employee so that I can go hang out at bodegas. My dad used to own a Convenient store but I was too young to work there. Alas.

Website
http://theloveofleaves.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Cane Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on September 30th, 2016
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Tim Horton's Iced Coffee Vanilla

Tim Horton's Iced Coffee Vanilla

This tastes like a candle and also tastes like it sucks. No stars. Wait...I can't do no stars? This website sucks almost as much as this drink. I said, "Could I have an iced coffee with vanilla, please?" and I think they misheard "vanilla" and thought I said candle wax. Three sips. There goes $2.16. Cripes. Grozz. Ugh. These are the sounds that I am audibly saying at work aloud as people try to work. "Try to work" is code for "fantasy football" so it sounds like everyone has a hearing impediment today.

Website
http://www.timhortons.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Not Listed
Categories
Coffee
Rating
1/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on September 26th, 2016
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Ginger People Bottoms Up Ginger Beer

Ginger People Bottoms Up Ginger Beer

My brother finds drinks sometimes and thinks he's going to be mean and buy me stuff he thinks might be gross. This isn't the gross one but is part of the group that he bought me. This one was actually really nice. It was sweet and really spicy, the way that ginger beer should be. It most certainly still had its feet in ginger ale territory but was dabbling in the ginger beer world. The spice was nice and it burns in all the right places. The fact that it was unfiltered means that it was laden with stuff at the bottom and you know how the Thirsty Dudes love stuff in their drinks. A+. Would drink again.

Website
http://www.gingerpeople.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Categories
Ginger, Soda Pop
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on September 26th, 2016
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Stok Cold Brew Iced Coffee Black

Stok Cold Brew Iced Coffee Black

Oh how I wish I had one of these now. No, not a 48 ounce bottle as that would be suicidal but the smaller, equally available 10 ounce bottle. Long nights, friends. Long nights. I know it would make me sick and dizzy but anything over this underslept feeling, which is garbage. I took a shot or two of this over the weekend, you know, just to get by, and it was nice. It was smooth, and although advertised as "not too sweet" it was definitely sweetened and possibly more than many people would like.

I don't have a preference as far as coffee goes, as you may well know, but sweet and usually with some sort of syrup is preferable. This met the criteria just fine. Lucky for me, there is a 48 ounce bottle with two shots missing at home waiting, for a girl like me (to come into my life).

Website
http://stokcoffee.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Categories
Coffee
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on September 26th, 2016
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Ripple Chocolate

Ripple Chocolate

"Nutritious Plant-Based Milk" isn't really milk at all, is it? I mean, you could argue that almond milk or soy milk isn't milk but I guess it's all in your definition of what "milk" is, now, isn't it? One thing I can say is that whether you call this milk or a plant-based milk, I can tell you that it is one thing, it's not that great.

It most certainly tastes like something is "up." It doesn't have the smoothness of milk. I don't want to say gritty but there is definitely some stuff up in there. I get that it's a nice alternative to dairy and for vegans, if you had the strength, you might do a backflip to hear that you've got another alternative to murderous milk.

This tastes like chocolate but as far as chocolate milk goes, it's definitely lacking in both sugar and chocolate. I'm not saying that as an insult but you might want to think of this as not only dairyless milk, but also think of it as "chocolate milk light" but put "light" in double quotes because this 12 ounce bottle still manages to cram 220 calories in her. It's a difficult battle, milk, but I suppose we can't let them have all the fun in Mootown.

Website
http://www.ripplefoods.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Cane Sugar
Categories
Milk
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on September 26th, 2016
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Starbucks Iced Coffee Chile Mocha

Starbucks Iced Coffee Chile Mocha

Whether or not there was coffee in this is another story, but this was fantastic, man. It had the earthiness from the chilies and the cinnamon. Really, I don't know if there was coffee in this and if there was, it was highly masked by the rest of the flavors. It wasn't spicy as much as it was the flavor of green chile. The chile and cinnamon were generously sprinkled on like a medium dusting from the spice fairy, a fictitious (presumably) creature that puts spices on food and drinks alike. The mocha was a good umbrella flavor. I don't go to Starbucks often but as soon as I saw this was out, I ditched whatever lunch plans I had and went there and was pleasantly pleased I didn't have to pull the old, "Do you have this? You don't? Welp, see you later." and walk out the door awkwardly. We've all done it. It's one thing to do it in a restaurant but have you ever done it in a drive through? Way worse. When the person wants you to pay for your meal and you have to say, "Oh, no. You didn't have what I wanted so now I have to sit in line with the rest of these buffoons." that's the worst. This was in stock and supposedly for a limited time, too so hurry on over and get one.

Website
http://www.starbucks.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Not Listed
Categories
Coffee
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on September 9th, 2016
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Excel Gooey Butter Cake

Excel Gooey Butter Cake

"I wish they would bottle the flavor of vanilla cupcakes so I could drink it all day." Yeah? I dare you to drink this for a whole day, dude. Two sips and I'm tapping out. It smells like a sixth grade girl, also. You remember when they all wore that temporarily good smelling cotton candy perfume? I liked it but for a limited time. This...I could be surrounded by six girls talking about Taylor Swift, Shopkins, One Direction, lip gloss, Gary from third period and Snapchat at the same time and take that longer than I could deal with the immense flavor of this.

Smell? Spot on. It's a cupcake. Taste? Sugar flavored sugar. It's so sweet and completely distracts from the flavor. The kid that you remember that used to sneak and eat sugar cubes from the coffee table wouldn't be able to drink this. This is turning into quite a "dare drink." Have at it, friends. Don't send me the doctor's bill, though.

Website
http://www.excelbottling.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Pure Cane Sugar
Categories
Soda Pop
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on September 6th, 2016
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Lucky Cherry Cherry Cola

Lucky Cherry Cherry Cola

Sometimes man, cherry cola is a perfect drink. When I would go to Mighty Taco, a local chain/franchise after a punk show, I would always get a cherry cola. I don't know why. It's one of the only times I drink the stuff. I like to keep it minimal because it makes me appreciate it more.

I thought this was "just" cola but oh no. Lucky cherry indeed. This is cherry cola and it's very good. It's very sweet and has a decent, candy-like cherry cola taste. It's a lot. I bet a lot of people would think this is too sweet and they most certainly would not be wrong. I probably couldn't and won't today finish this bottle myself. Twenty ounces is masochistic. It is good, though. I don't want my inability to drink so much cola to count against this otherwise delicious treat.

Country
United States
Sweetener
Pure Cane Sugar
Categories
Shot
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on August 30th, 2016
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Goldenbrew Green Tea and a touch of Honey

Goldenbrew Green Tea and a touch of Honey

What a refreshing treat. This is kind of the perfect green tea for me. Little bit of bitterness and a subtle sweetness. It tastes like honey and you know that it's green tea. I think at this point, we ignorant Americans can tell the difference between "Far East" tea and good, ol' fashioned British tea. America, sometimes you can be real morons. I shouldn't even have to write that but quite honestly, and this is not part of the review, but this country is in a state of disrepair. How did I get here from a beautifully crafted green tea? Well your ignorance and inability to accept foreign norms with open arms because you're so close minded and worried that something is going to happen if you do. Open your hearts, you turds. Seriously, just be cool. Open your mind.

This is a great tea. If you see it, put down that cola and put down that energy drink, take a breath, and prepare to close your eyes and take sips while envisioning yourself with your feet dangling off a pier. In this vision, your feet can be in or out of the water. It doesn't matter. It's the place and state of mind that matters, not your wet toes. Relax. Be cool. Drink this green tea. Doctor's orders.

Website
http://www.goldenbrewtea.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Honey
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on August 24th, 2016
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Tim Horton's Iced Cappuccino Twix

Tim Horton's Iced Cappuccino Twix

Twix, a cookie not a candy bar, is a wonderful cookie not a candy bar. Carmel, crunch, caramel and chocolate. If we're talking about "The Four C's," screw diamonds, dude. Twix is where it's at. How is this though? Sweet. I don't even know after all these years if there is any coffee in iced cappuccino, or as we in Western New York like to call them, "Iced Capps," anymore. They might be but it's so overpowered by sugar and cream and now cookie crumbles that what's the point anymore. This small was more than enough. There was probably the amount of a "fun size" Twix grinded up on the top which was fun to get through the straw at the end. The rest was just a sugary blur of cookie flavors and brown. I say that like it's a bad thing. Look, if you're the type of person to buy an iced cappuccino, you know what you're getting into and you know what you're doing to yourself. I'm not going to say it, but deep down you know what you're up to.

Website
http://www.timhortons.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Not Listed
Categories
Coffee, Milkshake
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on August 17th, 2016
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