Mike Literman (1766 reviews)

Mike loves new drinks. He's drank some gross stuff in his day, and this blog is making him drink even more against his will. That being said, he wouldn't trade it in for the world. He loves new beverages and is always, and always will be, on a quest for something new.

Core Organic Blueberry

Core Organic Blueberry

You know. It's a juice.

Wild blueberry. Is that different than a "regular" blueberry? I feel like you could add adjectives to anything and as long as it's not "wrong," it's right. "Well you do find them in the wild so they are technically wild blueberries. LOLZ." Farmers. Whatever, dudes.

This is fine. I didn't expect much as it's a Stevia juice with low calories. They kind of take the form of a fruit flavored sugar after a while. This doesn't taste bad but it hardly tastes like any blueberry I've ever tasted and I've been known to eat a blueberry every now and then. At ten calories per bottle though, I cannot and will not complain. This is actually a decent drink that met my expectations and allowed me to happily drink while not knowing if I was going to have some sort of caloric overload or sugar high, neither of which I want.

Website
http://core-hydration.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Erythritol
Categories
Juice
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on March 2nd, 2018
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Hint Caffeine Kick Lemon Cayenne

Hint Caffeine Kick Lemon Cayenne

This is half wonderfully punishing and half reminiscent of my jobs as a dishwasher. That's where I place it. The lemon ,oh, dat lemon. I don't know where this lemon flavor is from but it does not taste like real lemon. If it's real, I guess I don't know what real lemon taste like. As for the cayenne, I am from Buffalo and my roots are in cayenne. This is a welcomed punch in the tongue. Ever since Jay and I got rightfully reamed out by the guys as Prometheus Springs, we have grown to love and appreciate a nice, spicy drink. This being a water drink, though, has its chuggability diminished by the fact your mouth would be increasingly on fire. Being from where I am, though, this is actually good. Take a little sip. Get a little burn. Take a big gulp. Get a big burn. Swish it around. There's that tingle you want. Am I a masochist? Nope. Do I like a good runny nose when I eat spicy food? Yes I do.

The lemon did take some getting used to but was it awful? No. It wasn't. It just took my taste buds for a loop. It might have been the spice that threw it off. I don't know. I have another one at home that I look forward to drinking. Maybe I'll give it to my kids when they're bothering me. Was that Hint's intention? I don't care. Hint didn't know that they were going to trash their room again and expect me to clean it up did they? Some people spank their kids. I might just choose to give them secretly spicy drinks when they're not listening to their G.D. dad after he asked them to feed the dog four G.D. times.

Oh, and I don't know why there is caffeine in there. Do people need caffeine in their water?

Website
http://www.drinkhint.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Water
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on February 28th, 2018
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Stok Cold Brew Vanilla

Stok Cold Brew Vanilla

I drink one cup of coffee per day. I do not need it. I don't know why I do it. I might think I'm an adult but I could throw a baseball in any direction and have five people say that I am a fraud of a man.

This drink. I didn't know that it was vanilla as I graciously pulled it off the shelf. I did when I unwrapped it and then again as I drank it. The vanilla doesn't kill the drink and, if anything it smooths it out like any good, self-respecting vanilla would do. I don't know if there was milk in it but it could have been the vanilla that made it have that smoothness. They were spot on with their "Not Too Sweet" title, too because it's not tooth gratingly sweet. All of this while still retaining a good coffee flavor. All wrapped up in a nice little package.

One thing to note is that they must be making a hell of a concentrate to start off with. They tout a ten hour brew which is fourteen hours shorter than the cold brew I make and arguably as strong. They might be up to something in that facility. Take note. Sorcery perhaps?

Website
http://stokcoffee.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Coffee
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on February 20th, 2018
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Nestea Real Brewed Black Tea & Rooibos

Nestea Real Brewed Black Tea & Rooibos

Surprisingly after all this time we have only reviewed two Nestea drinks on this site. While not terribly surprising, they have put out decent things in the past and this should be added to the list assuming that you like rooibos. More about that in a second.

As I've said before, if I had it my way, I would just drink unsweetened tea for the rest of my life. Sugar is great but since I've been winding down in my reviews, I find it harder and harder to drink full sugar drinks like tea and pop. This was a nice treat at "slightly sweet." That I can deal with.

The black tea doesn't really shine and that strange/foreign rooibos takes its place. While I don't hate rooibos, its taste takes some getting used to. It seems fruitier and strangely darker than a black tea. Having drunk black tea pretty exclusively, it's a new flavor I'm just not accustomed to. It's absolutely not bad and I would actually put it in the "good" category. It was truly "slightly sweet" which I appreciated them sticking to their guns on.

I would like to try the black slightly sweet tea that they make. That might be a nice little number. Until I find it, though, I will try its older, more sophisticated, curmudgeonly unsweetened brethren.

Website
http://www.nestea.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on February 20th, 2018
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Bai Lambari Watermelon Lime

Bai Lambari Watermelon Lime

I think if Thirsty Dudes could have one sponsor it would be Big Lots. I believe that I speak for both Jay and myself when I say that for drinks, it's a great place. They never have the same thing and you could go once a month and find new stuff. It's not the best stuff, sure. It's not the most high end stuff, sure. Sometimes you find a lot of the same stuff but anything that's there a lot is truly and undeniably garbage at best. Recently they've been getting some nicer stuff though like Bruce Cost, Illy and Belvoir. Maybe they know we're going there.

This last time I went with my brother who has never "Thirsty Dude'd" with me and he just watched as I nonchalantly knocked drink after drink into my handcart. This being one of them and I'm glad I did because it's pretty darn good. Somehow the lime does cut through and ruin everything. The watermelon flavor was light and first followed by the lime. They're also doing a good job at taming their array of sweeteners because it no longer tastes like Stevia threw up in your mouth. It's also in a nice, small can so you don't get overwhelmed by the flavor. It's sweet. Not too sweet but I think anything larger than this there would be remainders.

Big Lots, if you're listening, we're accepting offers.

Website
http://www.drinkbai.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Bai Natural Sweetener Blend (Erythritol and Organi
Categories
Diet, Juice, Sparkling
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on February 19th, 2018
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Moneybag Root Beer

Moneybag Root Beer

Gene Simmons of Gene Simmons Toyota has released his own line, AKA signed the rights to his name, to a pop company. Is the pop any good? Is a Toyota Corolla purchased from Gene Simmons Toyota any good? Yeah, it's fine. It's root beer. Much like a Corolla, it's fine. It does what it's supposed to do and does it well. It isn't exceptional but it's reliable. I didn't know that the pop game was so large that just anyone could say, "Oh, I have the chance to make a million dollars so I'm going to stamp my reputable and honorable name on the line so people can drink my pop."

Would I drink this again. Yes. Was it good. Yes. Would I buy a car from him? Eh, why not. Some root beer is good and some root beer is great. This root beer was good but, like a Corolla, a good root beer is a dime a dozen.

Website
http://www.genesimmonsmoneybag.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Categories
Root Beer, Soda Pop
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on February 12th, 2018
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Coca-Cola Diet Zesty Blood Orange

Coca-Cola Diet Zesty Blood Orange

Sometimes you want a nice, dark cola. Most times, if I want cola, it's that. I used to drink diet cola. I think it was when my mom would only order us diet. You know, the 90's, when it was alright for kids to eat and drink anything at any time with no worries about disease or whatever. We played outside in the dirt where we belonged. Dirty dirt kids.

This is a nice alternative to those of you, like my manager(?) and mother-in-law who pretty exclusively drink diet Coke and might like a nice change but keep that same toxic diet flavor. This isn't terrible, alright. It's not. It's still most certainly diet. Unavoidably diet. The blood orange flavor is not super strong and certainly not strong enough to overcome that of the aspartame. It's more of like a "citrus diet Coke" than an explicit or definite flavor. I, for one, would not get it again but then again I am not the target demographic.

I bought another flavor of these that I am not not looking forward to drinking. Does that sell it at all? I regretfully drank this while regretfully doing my taxes. What a night. My mid-30's are garbage.

Website
http://www.coca-cola.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Aspartame
Categories
Diet, Soda Pop
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on February 12th, 2018
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7 Eleven Go! Yum Chocolate Mocha

7 Eleven Go! Yum Chocolate Mocha

Well this was a pleasant surprise. I dropped my son off at school and his teacher said, "Are you ready for the planetarium?" which reminded me that I didn't make him a lunch like a pile of crap dad. That being said, of the top three things that I dislike doing in life, making school lunch, a task that takes no longer than five minutes is one of them. Putting dishes away, another job that takes five minutes is also there if you're counting.

What does any good dad do when he didn't make his son a lunch? Go to the closest store and buy a turkey and cheese sub and some fruit and a juice. What does he do if he's a Thirsty Dude? Look around for drinks he hasn't reviewed wasting precious time that he doesn't have. That's what. I found this and thought that it might be alright and I've really been sleeping on making cold brew this week. I thought wrong. It's actually great. It's got a great cocoa taste and a great coffee taste. It's not too sweet and everything has their chance to shine. There is milk in it but it's neither milky nor chalky. This is the cold brew I wish I could make at home. This is fantastic.

Website
http://www.7-eleven.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Coffee
Rating
5/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on February 1st, 2018
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Pure Leaf Organic Black Tea Valencia Orange Peel

Pure Leaf Organic Black Tea Valencia Orange Peel

What a way to kick off a ten degree day; a nice little black tea with some citric citrus going on up in there. It's all very lightly sweetened and lightly flavored and comes together into a nice lil' package. The black tea is a light to medium brew and the Valencia just an "orangish" flavor. I'm no orange connoisseur so it's "just" orange to me. It unfortunately doesn't come in a gallon jug because I could sit here and drink it all day. Sure I got it across the street from where I work but it took me an hour to drink this. If I'm at work for eight hours and this cost me around $2.50, that's going to cost me a Jackson per day. There are better ways to spend your money.

Website
http://theloveofleaves.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Cane Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on December 13th, 2017
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Cultivo Cold Brew Coffee

Cultivo Cold Brew Coffee

I was worried about this. I split it with a dude at work and warned him that this would be strong and wildly caffeinated. I was wrong. It's got me a little jittery, which is fine, but some of the other cold brew I have drank got me lit up. It also is not hard to drink. I have said many a time that I drink coffee like a child would, with chocolate syrup in it but for this review, I went straight. It was not bad at all. I spent an hour and a half in my car due to snow so it wasn't as cold as it could have been but not docking that, it was good. I would say that this being just a medium coffee with average caffeine makes it something I could easily and have easily made at home.

All that being said, a little carton of black cold brew is a nice thing to just be able to pick up and go.

Website
http://cultivo.coffee
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Coffee
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on December 8th, 2017
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