Sports/Dietary Supplement - 535 Reviews

You know there are dragons in that water. It's true. In Colorado there are dragons that only come out at night, like in the Smashing Pumpkins song, that swim around in the water. Didn't you ever wonder why there was a "No swimming past sunset" rule statewide? Yeah, that'd be because of the dragons. Thing is, they are messy characters. It's alright though because when they shed their scales, they fall in the water, degrade, and are made of like a sweet, fruity powder. They all flow downstream to the bottling plant where we make this "dragonfruit" drink. It's a really clean process. Sure, poop gets in the mix, but that's what filters are for. It's like a saltwater fish tank. We've got mediums that the poop and dragon hair and cans and garbage goes through so that we are left with the cleanest, purest flavored water.

What do you mean you don't believe me?! Come over here and look at this footage. Tell me that's not a dragon playing with a beach ball in the lake. You can't do it. It's mesmerizing, I know. I had never seen anything like it until I came here. They don't like people and do, even though it's a stereotype, breathe fire. They will breathe fire right on you and you will die. It's no joke and happens all the time. Our filters find people all the time. Parts. Legs and stuff. They think they're so smart with their scientific equipment coming in trying to get them for zoos and stuff. Dragons win all the time.

This drink is a rarity that can't come from anywhere but here, and it's great. There are other dragonfruit drinks but they aren't as authentic as this. This drink is light, sweet, fruity, and very quenching. Colorado's finest. Plus, we've chocked it full of vitamins, antioxidants, and more so that it's even better than regular juice or Vitamin Water. Now that you know that you shouldn't mess around in the water at night, enjoy your stay in Colorado.

In the 25 years that I lived at home our fridge always had a jug of "blue juice" in it. Yes that's right I didn't move out of my mom's house until I was 25. Sure I could have gotten my own place much sooner, but I was on tour a lot and paying for an apartment when I was gone for a good chunk of time seemed stupid (I did pay my mom rent for the time I was in Buffalo). My living situation isn't the important aspect of this story, the “blue juice” is. That neon fluid was two packets of Kool Aid's Sharkleberry Fin (or whatever the name of that flavor was at the time) and way too much sugar. Our house was famous for this drink, and if we were ever out and my friends went to get a glass there was certainly a minor scene. This may seem like a pointless story, but it is relevant because this drink tastes like Gatorade's version of blue juice. Sure, it has a lot less sugar and that very specific Gatorade taste to it, but the base is all Sharkleberry Fin. I rarely drink Gatorade, but the flavor of this brings me back to a better time before rent and bills were an issue. A time where my friends and I had more of a claim to my family's house than my mom did. Strange times.

Imagine spending your entire life hating coconuts and everything they flavor. For years your hatred rose to a point where if anything had even trace amounts of the fruit you wouldn't taste it for all the pineapples in Hawaii. I lived those dark days. It got to the point where I couldn't even see the humor in a coconut carved to look like a monkey. Then one day everything changed. You see I wasn't alone in my anti-coconut crusade. All three of us here at Thirsty Dudes had the same aversion. It was an unspoken bond that we would put off reviewing coconut waters for as long as we could, and with so many beverages in the world that could be a long, long time. One day a package showed up. It was full of dozens of cartons of coconut water. Even though our hatred ran strong, our duty to the website was stronger. We each took a handful of the drinks and went to our respective homes to taste the foulness in peace. I don't know about the others, but I can say that the one I drank was better than I expected, but not something I actually enjoyed. By that I mean that I was able to drink the entire bottle without wanting to throw up. We each posted reviews and we thought we were done with it. Then a magical comment appeared on one of our reviews. It instructed us that we should make sure that we drank coconut water ice cold. I thought what the hell and I gave it a try. I can't explain what a difference a few dozen degrees makes. A drink that was chalky and gross suddenly became refreshing and flavorful. I began to truly enjoy coconut water.

All of that took place about a year ago. Oh how things change. Here I sit in my home and within twelve hours of procuring this carton of coconut water I'm leaning back and enjoying it. The flavor is called “Pineapple Punch,” but since it's pineapple and coconut it really is just a pina colada. Who would have thought that I would ever like drinking pina colada? If you had handed me one in the past it would have gone directly down the drain. Now I'm sipping it from a carton, like my computer room was some kind of paradise. It tastes mostly like normal coconut water with just a hint of pineapple mixed in. Our citrus friend is kept in check, so the drink remains nice and smooth. As an added bonus vitamins from GNC added to it. I don't notice them in the flavor or texture, so that is a good thing.

Now that you are done imaging a world where you hate coconuts take a moment to imagine a world where everyone abbreviates everything and “phenom” is used as an adjective constantly. That would be a frightening place to live.

The thing I hate about Vitamin Water is my intake of stale vitamins. There's nothing worse than taking a nice big gulp of a cool refreshing beverage and getting a mouthful of old vitamin. This is apparently what Activate wants you to think. I don't know if it's even possible for vitamins to go stale, and it has never affected the taste of my Vitamin Water, but I do like the novelty of the Activate line.

These drinks come in two parts; a bottle of water that is sweetened with stevia and a cap full of powdered vitamins. You twist one part of the cap and the vitamins drop into the water, which you then shake up. The idea is that the vitamins are healthier because they are fresh. Aren't the vitamins the same age whether they already come in the water or not? I suppose it doesn't really matter, it's still fun.

This tastes like what a modern grandmother would have for breakfast. Every morning my grandmother would cut a grapefruit in half and dust it with sugar, then chow down with the tiniest knife and spoon I have ever seen. I think she may have stolen them from some tiny race of people in the forest, but I can't be sure. So yeah, I can only assume a more health conscious modern grandmother would dust her grapefruit with stevia. If you ate said grapefruit right after eating your chewable kids vitamins, then took a sip of water then you would know exactly what this drink tastes like. The flavor is light and faint. The stevia is there, but not overpowering. Just like it should be. Well played activate. Now I just need to see if your vitamins really are fresher and healthier, or if you're just a big stupid liar head.

According to the Tori Amos song, which I can only assume like a great big idiot is the namesake of this drink "She's convinced she could hold back a glacier." Well maybe, just maybe she could hold back a wall of ice, but even if she could do that, there is absolutely no way she could hold back the monumental force of Glaceau as a company or in the way of flavor. Vitamin water has become as commonplace as Coke or Pepsi and that is something they should be proud of. They have done it with quality tasting drinks as well (okay their "Zero" line could use some work).

This is the first time I've tried the Spark flavor and I can assure you that it will be my new go-to flavor when I'm at random gas stations in the middle of nowhere America. I really think they should rethink what they are calling this flavor though. They have dubbed it "grape-blueberry" but obviously they modeled the flavor off of the blue Lik-M-Aid Fun Dip. It tastes exactly like you licked the white sugar stick, stuck in the package and then bit a big chunk of it off. It's delicious, but this drink tastes less sugary than the actual candy (which is basically solidified sugar dipped into powdered sugar). Also, it is fine to share this drink with someone, where it should be completely unacceptable to share your Lik-M-Aid. No one wants to double dip into your spit sugar.

Look son, I don't know how else to say this, but you've been sucking this season at T-ball. I'm sorry, but as your daddy, I feel like I should be the one to tell you. You're not the worst kid on the team, but I feel like even the worst player on the team could have caught that pop fly you missed by a good ten feet today. Are you alright? Do you need glasses? Do you need me to take you to that new giant glasses store on the Boulevard and get you a pair of specs? I will. If there is anything I can do to increase your T-ball stats, please, let me know. I know you're only eight, but money is no object. Todd, Kenny's daddy, asked me if you were feeling alright. You know how I felt at that moment? Humiliated.

What's that? You're just thirsty and you are thinking of drinks when you are on the field? Well, I guess that just plain old water isn't doing the trick before a game so let's see what we've got here. Oh, hey, you like drawing, right? Well I just found this drink called Crayons so you can let it draw a line to your throat and you can draw me the size of the trophy case you want after you start playing like a champ again. Flavor? Oh, it's punch. You like fruit punch, right? Sure you do. You're eight. Salty? I wouldn't use that as an adjective to describe a drink. Let me try that. Fruity and...Oh, there it is. You're right. Salty. If you like that, I have some pretzels that you can have if you think that it will get you out of this rut of crappy T-ball playing. You're right. Aside from the light saltiness, it's pretty good. It certainly went down fast enough. It's like kids Gatorade. Also, strangely, for something listed as "all natural", you would think that there would be more than 0% fruit juice.

How are you feeling, buddy. Are you glad we have this talk? I am. You're going to do great next week. We can practice all day so you do better and not humiliate me any more.

Let me get this straight. It's January 7th, I'm in Buffalo, NY and it's 45 degrees? Well that seems completely insane. Anyone who doesn't believe in global warming should check themselves, because it's hear and we're loving it (well until summer comes, and until ice caps melt and we all float away). To celebrate I took my old bike (my good one has a flat tire randomly) out for a ten mile ride. It wasn't too long, but when you haven't ridden in three months and it still feels pretty cold when you're riding fast and the wind is blasting you in the face. I still had a good time though. I like adventuring through random backstreets and seeing where I end up. For reference I have absolutely no sense of direction and I get lost easily, which is what makes this fun.

In order to prepare I layered up on clothes and realized it was time to give this Gatorade Prime 01 a test drive. When Mike drank one he said that it had an almost slimy texture. I couldn't agree more. "Almost slimy" is the perfect way to describe it. As your squeezing it into your mouth from the pouch it feels super slimy. Almost like quarter machine slime. Then when it's in your mouth for a second it seems just like a slightly thicker Gatorade. It's weird. I don't know why it feels like a different consistency, but it does and it's strange. The flavor of it falls pretty much dead center between regular fruit punch Gatorade and straight up Gatorade concentrate.

I was weary about drinking this, but the flavor and consistency was much better than anticipated. It also made me chock full of carbs and B vitamins.

James, it's great to see you. How was space? Great? Did you play golf in space? Man, I would have driven the ball all the way to earth and then, somehow, watch it burn up on re-entry. Oh, the thought of that gets me so pumped. So, space. That must have been awesome. Really? No cheese. Well, the pamphlets they are handing out down here on earth are telling me otherwise. It's Swiss, but it's space cheese nonetheless.

Woah! What is this? Really? Gifts, from space? Oh, gifts from NASA. Cool, but honestly, space gifts sounds a lot better. I guess NASA gifts would be of better quality since there is nothing in space, apparently, except space rocks. Really though? Not one moon rock? You brought me official NASA dried fruit. That's cool. What am I supposed to do with this? Oh, mix it in with this space water you gave me? What are these, strawberries and apricots? Awesome. Let me mix it here. Oh, this is delicious. You know what, though? It just tastes like Sobe Lifewater. It's better the more I drink it. No one uses apricots and I cannot appreciate these space dried ones more. Strawberries? I have had these and they are delicious, but I've had them. I appreciate them, but I've had them. I enjoy the erythritol sweetness and the fifty-fifty strawberry/apricot mix. This is good, dude. Thanks. I can buy it mostly anywhere as, like I said, Sobe Lifewater, but this being space juice makes it so much better. Thank you very much.

Woah! You brought me a Fisher Space Pen from NASA, too? This is the pen that writes upside down! Awesome. I'm sorry that I gave you such a hard time about that moon rock and space cheese stuff. This is a great gift.

When I feel myself getting sick, like if I wake up with a sore throat, cough, or the like, I have two "Go-To" fixes. One is to buy a small carton of orange juice and slam it in one day, spinning my body into a scurvy-free, urinating ball of vitamin C. The other one, which I use less, is to drink Gatorade. Any flavor would have been better than this, though, because it's rank, and no, not like The Smith's record.

Oh this is lime, but it's got a certain...undesirable viscosity. It is from the carbo-loading qualities of the "02 Perform" line. If I were training for a marathon and wanted to skip on my eleventh spaghetti and potato meal of the day, I would slam this as fast as my gullet would approve because even then, I wouldn't want it. I guess as far as carb drinks go, this is pretty good as it actually tastes like lime and your mouth is already used to the thickness of it. For people like me who don't work out and just skip meals while blaming it on my kid taking up all my time but really it's because a Subway foot-long sub the way I like it is upwards of the worst thing one can eat, I just want a simple Gatorade. This loses the superior drinkability that I like about Gatorade. Taste-wise though; consider the mark missed.

When I was working at Fun Fun Fun Fest, someone came up to me and asked if I wanted a B12 shot. I said sure and followed them to the production trailer. When we got inside, I saw a doctor pulling needles out of a bag. When they said B12 shot, I thought they meant a drink like this. I hate needles so I opted out and went back to work.

Going in, I wasn't crazy about this flavor. I love pomegranate but HATE acai with a passion. I think it's one of the grossest tastes ever. That being said, this isn't as bad as I feared. It still has that gross flavor, but the pomegranate helps. It's not the most intense energy shot I've ever had, but that's probably because it's meant to be a vitamin shot, and the energy is just a secondary feature.

At first glance I thought this was a weight loss drink. Then I read the bottle and realize that it was a focus drink. Speaking of the bottle, I love this bottle. It's one of those aluminum bottles and it has a nice matte finish to it. It makes holding it quite enjoyable.

Okay enough nerdy bottle talk, let's get into the guts of this. I love focus drinks, my favorite being Brain Toniq. I am a soda/coffee/energy drink fiend so it's nice to find alternative ways to stay focused and awake during the day. I'm half way through this bottle and I can already tell this works. I feel much more alert and awake, and ready to continue building this website as soon as I'm done writing this review.

As far as taste goes, it's good but not mind blowing. It's a lightly carbonated orange/tangerine drink. It's not as thick as orange soda, but kind of reminds me of a light Italian soda. I'd be really interested in trying other flavors they have available.

It's an important day. You need to be at the top of your game. You need a drink that will not only refresh you but also boost your focus, energy and stamina. There is going to be a lot of battling going on and there is a good chance things could get brutal. Lucky for you that O.N.E. has released an active line of their coconut water. It's fruity, sweet and tastes decent. You know you have a decent drink on your hand when you drink have a carton, and then you are shocked to discover that it is sweetened with stevia. Now that I know I can taste it, but I never would have guessed before I read it. Cranberry and grapefruit make a great team. Other companies should really pick them for their hypothetical touch football teams.

Now I know what you're thinking; how did the big day pan out? More importantly, what did the big day entail? Well I will tell you, the big day was going with my friend so that he could go to adopt a cat. Seems dumb right? Why would anyone need any of the skills I mentioned just to go to a car adoption center? The answer is that I have a problem with cats. I fall in love with every cat that I see and I want to bring them all home and live in a house with a million cats that will follow me around everywhere. Yes I am crazy, but I also understand the disgusting aspect of that. I don't want to smell like a million cats. We went in, hung out with a bunch of cats. I fell in love at every turn. Specifically a huge fat cat named Pauly took a firm grip of my heart. I was inches from adopting him. The lady even tried to give him to me for free. He is eight years old and has a deviated septum so he makes the worlds most hilarious noises. I stood strong though and remembered how needy my cat Manny is and how she would hate me if she had to compete for my attention more. I sadly left Pauly and about 40 other cats behind. My friend, he got an adorable little kitty with a mustache that is now named Natas (so very nearly called Patricia Aracat).

Thank you O.N.E. for helping me keep my head, and therefore keep my household down to two humans and two felines.

Todd, daddy asked you to make him some Tang. I don't know how to make it. No, I don't know. Mom always makes it for me. I think it's two teaspoons of powder and eight ounces of water. That sounds right. That looks a little light but it's probably right. Go give it to daddy.

What did he say? He said it was good but tasted like it was watered down? Oh, Todd. Table spoons. Table spoons. Two table spoons not teaspoons. That's what we did wrong. We were close to correct. It's a good thing daddy didn't hit you. You know how important Tang is to him. Wait a second. This isn't Tang at all. It is something called Vitamin Enriched Water. It looks like it and smells like it but...yeah, it just tastes like watered down Tang. Todd, daddy was an astronaut. I think he knows a thing or two about Tang. I can't believe he couldn't taste the difference. I guess it's a good business model, though. Buy regular Tang, use half as much, charge as much as Tang, but have twice the supply so you make twice the money. What do I know about business models, though? I'm only nine.

I've been groundskeeper of Bushwood Country Club for quite a few years now. Sure before that I was jocking out in Tibet, but that was only briefly. I mean when the Dalai Lama promises you total consciousness, there's really nowhere else to learn there. So here I am at Bushwood and I have to be honest most of the clientele around here are low-grade amateurs. They swing. They hit. They get stuck in the sand trap. Day in and day out it's the same thing. I just sit back and smile politely. I'm no dummy they are the ones with the cash and I live off the tips.

Lately Ty Webb, the only decent golfer I've seen on these lynx in years has been talking up this Golfer Aid drink. He says it's the secret of his game. Who am I to argue? The man has the focus of a statue. You should hear the weird noses he makes on the green. Along with focus, Mr. Webb has been telling everyone that it improves your balance, flexibility, strength, stamina and endurance. Sounds to me like if you drink it you're going to turn into the Hulk or something, but I promised him I'd give it the old college try, and Carl Spackler is a man of his word.

Hmm. This stuff tastes odd in the best possible way. It has to be the agave, but it's sweet in a very specific way that I can really dig. It actually reminds me of that Brain Toniq I tried a few months back. That was also supposed to improve focus, so maybe this is pure focus that I taste. Is this what my deathbed is going to taste like? I sure hope so. I do feel a tad more clarified. Perhaps this would be the best time to go out again and try to kill that darn gopher. He's been plaguing me long enough. With this extra brainpower he should be a corpse and I bet I'll be able to get in a quick back nine before it gets too dark to see. Mr. Webb sure is a smart man. Funny too. I made it through this whole can and I already want another. It's nice. It really just tastes like agave and it's lightly carbonated. I didn't expect that. With a name with "aid" at the end I was expecting some sorts of sports drink, but this is the sophisticated man's sports drink. It's meant for the upper class, and that is what I am for the day. So I got that goin' for me, which is nice.

Hangover Joe's sent us a package of these Hangover Recovery Shots. Since none of us here at Thirsty Dudes drink alcohol, we outsourced our review to our friend and cohort Pat Shanahan. Last night was Mohawk Place's (our favorite bar/place for shows in Buffalo) annual Xmas party. Originally Pat was going to wait to get drunk enough to need to drink this, but about halfway through the night he had a change of heart and the PBR flowed like water down his gullet. As you can see from his review he got drunk, fast, and his alter ego "Brocktoon" made an appearance. Here's what he had to say.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Sometimes you spend a long evening drinking keg beer at your favorite dive bar. Later, You take a nap on floor. A couple of hours later the bartender gives you a ride home. Nice guy. Fast forward to the morning after. You take a hangover recovery shot. Tastes kinda like generic Smarties. Not too bad. I kind of wish it was bigger. Maybe it helps to relieve the headache, just a little bit, but not too much. Now you have to walk to your friend's house to feed their cat while they are out of town. At least you didn't get arrested, or get anyone pregnant. Merry Xmas." - Pat

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
As for a Thirsty Dude's perspective on the taste of this, it tastes like someone mixed an entire package of Kool Aid powder into a shot glass of water. It's sweet, fruity and very strong. I understand where Pat got his Smarties taste. It really tastes like a Kool Aid flavored energy shot. They share a lot of the same ingredients. Actually now that I look at the ingredients of this and a 5 Hour Energy back to back this is pretty much an energy shot with some extra vitamins in it. Makes sense. We wish Pat/Brocktoon a speedy recovery.

I took one sip of this whist driving and instantly closed it up and threw it in the back seat. This is not good by a long shot. It's like the company took every little thing that anybody didn't like about Vitamin Water, then mixed in Splenda for a sweetener and finally dumped some taurine and caffeine in there to give it a slight chemical energy drink taste.

Splenda has to be my least favorite sweetener. I can get by with other artificial "diet" sweeteners, but Splenda is just chalky and terrible beyond belief. This is supposed to be tropical citrus flavored, and I guess that is hidden underneath all of that fake sugar, but it's hard to make it out through the haze.

This is the FUBU of the beverage world. You could say that this is "for us, by us" but only if you were an athlete. Unless the great congregation of sports aficionados accepts air hockey as a true sport, this drink was not made for me. I don't care I'm going to drink it anyways. What are they going to do, send the sports police after me?

This is one of the best sports drinks I've ever had. It's all-natural and it shows in the flavor. I tend to enjoy sports drinks, but I believe this may be the first one that I've ever tasted that actually has real fruit juice in it. They claim it's for color, but I've never had another drink taste so much like grapes (slightly watered down mind you) that wasn't actual grape juice. The flavor is strong, but only to a point. It still distinctly tastes like a sports drink, but in a fruitier way.

I really hope this catches on and they get a better distribution deal. I would love to be able to pick these up at gas stations instead of their competitors.

Pomegranates: +1
Nectarines: -1
Coconut Water: 0

Total Score: 0

Regardless of the rather neutral score, I was somewhat enthusiastic to try it. Maybe it's because I don't ingest a lot of nectarine flavored drinks. I don't like to eat oranges, but I enjoy the orange flavor. I sped drank think before the coconut water took over. You know, the inherent chalkiness that comes with a coconut drink. You get a flavor, and it's fruity, but I personally couldn't distinguish between pomegranate and nectarine.

If I had to make a list of coconut drinks for people who don't like coconut drinks, this would be one on the list.

I'd like to think that when Talking Rain was trying to get an advertising campaign together for this line of drinks someone in the board meeting spoke up about it being the obvious choice to have Chuck Berry as a spokesperson. I'd like to think that the idea (along with a sampler of drinks) even made it to Mr. Berry's desk. He sat back in his chair and thought to himself "Well, why not?" He was getting up their in years and wasn't able to perform nearly as much as he used to. Also, the contracts he signed early in his youth didn't really pan out for him as well as they should have. Why not take on one last job? It would be easy. They could just play his classic songs "Do the Twist" and "Twist Again." At the end he could be standing there with a guitar play a little lick and then say some tagline. It would be easy and help provide a little extra for his family when he inevitably shuffled off this mortal coil. He was just about to respond to the offer when he cracked open a bottle of the mango acai flavored water. He took a sip and it wasn't as good as he would have hoped, but it was good enough to get his endorsement. He continued to write his response, taking sips every so often. He's an old timer and never really got he hang of computers so typing took him awhile. With each sip the drink tasted worse. Even though everything in the drink is organic, it tasted off. It almost was like a more flavorful cleaner. It doesn't really make any sense. It only slightly tasted like mango and it didn't really taste like agave. Maybe it's what the watered down acai was to blame. Chuck hesitated in his typing, took one more sip and decided they shouldn't have added a sweetener at all. If it were just water with mango and acai nectar mixed in it would have been more palatable. He closed his browser and turned off the computer. The beverage was sub par and he was the legendary Chuck Berry. Why should he give them a courtesy response?

If we learned one thing here it's that Check Berry can be kind of a jerk about returning emails. A simple "No Thank You" would have been fine and courteous. Looks like the fame has gone to his head.

Glug glug glug glug glug glug breath....ugh. Glug glug glug glug glug glug breath....ugh. Glug glug glug glug glug glug breath....ugh. When you drink this, it's good, but then you breathe, you know, out of necessity, and you get a taste of the spicy Splenda. I don't like acai, but you can taste blueberry, maybe pomegranate, but it's not disgustingly bitter like acai likes to make drinks.

Attention! People on diets! This isn't the worst Splenda drink. Sure, if you're used to drinking it, it's no leap since your taste buds are already annihilated due to years of abuse. If you are at a gas station, and you are on a diet, and they only carry egg nog or lard cola and this, get this, but bring me back some of that lard cola. I've got to review it.