Iced Tea - 901 Reviews

Karen was a stupid idiot. She was one of those people who always said, "I could make this better at home." when she ate or drank things. It was annoying to spend any amount of time with her because it was almost certain she would utter it. One thing that made it more annoying was that she was not a fantastic cook, or baker, so every time she said it, you would flashback to the time she said, "Oh, remember that time we had that meal at that restaurant? Well I made it and it was way better." and it sucked. No offense to Karen, but she was an excellent banker but a terrible copycat when it came to food.

She went to the store and bought a bottle of Mmm...Tea's black tea, honey, and lemon tea and brought it home. She took a sip and thought, obviously, that she could make it better at home. She thought the tea was a bit bitter but did have an honest, lemon and honey taste. The actual slice of lemon in the bottle probably helped a bit. She brewed some black tea, bought some honey in a bear container as she thought that was the pinnacle of honey manufacturing, and a lemon. She mixed everything up, and threw it in the fridge for a couple hours. She took it out, poured it into a glass, and for the first time made something that was actually better than the original.

Congratulations, Karen. Enjoy your success until the next time you try and make something better than the original.

Something happened around the turn of the century where people started to give up on bars of soap. Suddenly they weren't good enough for people. Maybe people thought they couldn't get them clean enough or something, either way people left the bars on the shelf and America embraced the new product known as body wash. I am a grown ass man and I will confidently admit that I use body wash. The reason I do is that I have some that smells like red licorice and the aroma is delicious. That really plays no part in this tale though. The important thing here is that the body wash empire got greedy. They were blinded by the new trend and in their minds the entire world would soon turn to their products and bar soap would become obsolete. As a result many of them purchased the ingredients needed to make the wash in obscene surplus. Now that a decade has passed the body wash folk are realizing that they have reached their limit of customers. Those who are not already using their products will cling to their bars of soap until the day they die. The problem was they were stuck with enough warehouses of materials to fill a smaller state, like Rhode Island. Sure they were able to sell the “soap” ingredients to some of the bar companies at a loss, but what to do with the “gel” ingredients? After many late night board meetings a solution was thought up; they would sell the ingredient, which are perfectly safe to consume, to the beverage industry to make drinks with interesting textures.

Vita Lina jumped at the chance to ride the crest of a possible trend of drinks with strange consistencies. They released this line of flaxseed drinks that has a viscosity that falls somewhere between body wash and a normal drink. It doesn't taste soapy in any way, but the texture is there, and it's weird. I personally like it a lot. It's interesting, and I notice that I take smaller sips than normal. A few friends who tried it were not so into it. They couldn't get past the texture to even contemplate the flavor, which has a nice subtle mango quality to it. I can't blame them. Even though I like the consistency, I do find it distracting from the flavor. I feel like I can taste texture in this drink, and since I'm not a robot that is impossible. It says it's a drink, but since there is tea in it, I consider it an iced tea. Truth be told it tastes more like a drink that is not overly sweetened than tea.

After the saddest strip club these eyes have ever seen, we decided to try our luck in Ybor City, a delightful little place that I wish we had gone instead of Channelside. Look, no offense to the people of Channelside, but that is a place for tourists and dummies. Thanks for putting everything into a neat little "Off Ramp" style plaza, but I like a bit of dirt and grime with my travels.

We walked half a dozen of the most David Caruso friendly, murder-welcoming blocks, literally over onto the "Good Side" of actual railroad tracks, to Ybor city. I'm on a quest for drinks and the dudes I was with wanted dranks. There is a difference. I saw a convenience store that looked like it would have some gems in it so my sights were locked in. After a few attempts to go into bars failed, I got my chance. We had people waiting outside so I had to make it quick. I grabbed this ice tea, which we haven't reviewed, and skipped some other things that I could have grabbed but I knew our luggage was packed tight and I didn't want to risk not being able to bring it aboard the boat. Cut to this morning.

After a good, Continental breakfast with fantastic home fries, I wanted to give it a whirl. I was reluctant due to it being a tallboy of hackneyed green tea, but there is something else in this can. I can't put my finger on it. I want to say Mason. No! Floral. I don't know exactly what it is but it sets itself apart from the seemingly endless array of "green tea with ginseng and honeys out there. Taste, though... Eh. No green tea bite, no honey flavor. I mean, it's good, but that mystery taste is overwhelming and takes away from the intended flavors of the tea.

In twenty minutes I will board a shuttle to the docks and embark on my travels. I hope we don't have rough seas because between the mediocre-at-best food and a wavy ship, I might just throw up inside of a water slide.

At the top of the list that I find upsetting today is that this company has zero web presence. We drink so many drinks that go from garbage to mediocre to decent, and almost all of them have some sort of website or info online. Of course now that we find a company whose teas squeeze our mind grapes in all the right ways, we have no way of ordering more. Friend to Thirsty Dudes Marcus Scott Meadows sent us this tea as a gift. It's made in IL where he is from, and I've never had a drink make me wish I lived somewhere else before. I want this to be readily available to me in any corner store. Actually the fact that it is not pretty much proves to me that god is either dead or never existed.

This is a kettle brewed green tea whose flavor I would liken to the green tea you are served in high-end Chinese restaurants. They take that great tea and sweeten it with honey. I am a huge supporter of unsweetened tea, but when it has to be sweetened honey is the way to go. It adds such a great flavor to green tea, without making it overly sweet. Had Mmm..Tea stopped there I would have said this is one fine tea that is not to be missed. They were not content with that though. To step up their game they cut a decent sized chunk of ginger and put it in the bottom of the bottle. Suddenly this tea has gone from great to astronomical. I've heard it said that the key to a man's heart is through his stomach, well I can assure you that the key to my stomach is with ginger. I eat it daily on everything: Asian food, veggie dogs, veggie burgers, burritos, you name it. The fact that this is not only flavored with ginger, but also contains a big hunk of it is going to make it hard for me to find a better iced tea. Oh and before you ask, of course I are the ginger when the tea was gone. What do you think I am, an amateur?

I really wish I had been the one to review the “regular” sweet tea that Tradewinds makes. I would have liked to compare it to this to see just how much sweeter this is. I will say that this is the closest tasting prepackaged tea that I have ever had to authentic sweet tea that I've drunk on trips down south. It's just brewed black tea leaves and sugar, glorious, glorious sugar. There is no mistaking that real sugar taste in here. It tastes like someone filled up a pitcher with water, put in a mess of tea bags, and an even bigger mess of sugar and let it sit in the sun for a few hours to warm it up and let it brew. It makes me want to sit in a rocking chair on a front porch with an old dusty dog. I don't think there's a bigger compliment for sweet tea. Oh yeah if you drink one of these a day for a month I'm pretty sure your teeth will rot out of your head. Make sure you brush properly. I don't want to play any part in your poor dental hygiene.

The year was 2000. Y2K had come and gone without a sound, Bill Clinton was still president, and I had just graduated from high school. After graduation, I moved into a house in Buffalo just around the corner from the coffee shop Stimulance. This coffee shop would quickly become a place I went to a lot. From getting a bagel with cream cheese in the morning, to evenings drinking Snicker-chinos (a delicious coffee drink that tasted like a burnt Snickers bar). Lets not forget their classic weekly open mic nights. Oh memories...

So why am I talking about this coffee shop that has long since closed? Well it was the first place I ever bought a bottle of Nantucket Nectars from. It was a bottle of their lemonade and I was instantly hooked. This bottle is their half and half (half lemonade, half iced tea) and it's just as good as the solo lemonade flavor. A lot of companies get the ratio all wrong, but those folks in Nantucket know what they're doing.

Everyone thought that Stephen Lina and his father were charlatans because they sold heath tonics out of a little cart. They were early wave traveling sales men, but unfortunately for them some men had come before them trying to make a quick buck by swindling people out of their money by offering them what were essentials vials of dyed sugar water. The Linas were not con artists like these others. They had similar selling tactics as their peers, but their product actually worked. You see Mr. Lina was a scientist and he had discovered the healing properties of flaxseed. He knew it could be used to help combat ailments that would in the future come be known as cholesterol, diabetes, cancer, constipation, menopause, heart disease and depression.

Mr. Lina could have easily made it public knowledge that flaxseeds could help cure so many ailments, but then his family would stay exactly where they were: in the poor house. He had promised a better wife for his family, so he made up a whole mess of flaxseed tonics, loaded up the family cart and went out to make his fortune with his son. It's just unfortunate that the time that they chose to go sell their wares was the same time that people across the country were getting fed up with scam artists ripping them off and not healing their problems. The Linas were chased out of every town they went to. They never once even sold a bottle of their flaxseed tonic. Broken and beaten the two men returned home with their tales between their legs to live out the rest of their life in poverty.

It wasn't until over a hundred years had passed that Stephen's great grandson David's interest was piqued when his grandmother told him tales of the traveling Linas. He found his great great grandfather's notebooks in an old trunk and used his fancy college science degree to make up a batch of “Vita Lina” as his ancestors had called it. It tasted okay, but it needed a little something. He just happened to have some iced tea and a can of guava juice on hand, for some unknown reason, so he added it to the mixture. That was exactly what was needed. What his grandfather had once called a tonic was now a tasty beverage that was most definitely marketable. The guava and iced tea masked most of the flavor of the flaxseed, but it was still slightly there. Nothing about the flavor was offensive at all. In fact if one were unaware of the flaxseed content, they would never be the wiser. The consistency was a bit off though. It was a little thick, our young scientist's girlfriend most than once announced that it felt like she was drinking body wash when she would take a sip. David didn't think it was that thick, but he gave it to her that it was thicker than most drinks in a strange way. David eventually teamed up with Simply Originals, to distribute his beverages, and finally his family started to see some money from their ancestor's ideas. It was a good day.

If my grandmother saw me drinking this she would probably yell something along the lines of, “You're drinking mums. Why are you drinking mums? Why are you drinking flowers?” I knew a chrysanthemum was a flower, but I never would have thought “oh yeah those are mums like in my grandmother's garden.” Yes I now realize that “mum”
is in chrysanthemum, but whenever I said the name before I always thought it was “chrysanthium.” I am certainly not a botanist.

To answer my grandmother's question I would have to respond with “I am contractually obligated to try every drink that is in my path that is not alcoholic.” I basically signed the Hippocratic Oath of beverages. Did this drink look appetizing when I saw it in the store? Nope, but I bought it anyways out of obligation. I admit that I have grown to appreciate some flowery drinks over the past two years or so, but a flower that looks like the one on this can is not screaming flavor. I know exactly how that flower smells and I don't want to taste it. I really don't, but I must. Fine I'll get it over with quick. Hmmm that was an unexpected turn of events. This drink is overloaded with the taste of licorice root. I expected Easter floral hell, but what I got was only ever so slightly floral and mostly licorice. Sometimes I wish that licorice root tasted like red licorice, but that's really not licorice at all. I actually absolutely despise black licorice “licorice,” but I love things flavored with licorice root, specifically root beers. I'm actually a bit bummed that Mike isn't here to enjoy this with me, because I know he would absolutely love it. To recreate this beverage, get yourself a bottle of sweet tea and while you're drinking it chew on a stick from a licorice tree (yeah we've done it, but it doesn't make us hippies). Swallow and repeat.

Jay and I are friends. Every Thursday, we get together, get dinner, talk about how bad my music preference is, and usually buy drinks. Today's dinner was a delicious Jamaican restaurant called the Rasta-Rant. Cute, I know. Jay got a Grace Tropical Rhythm Pineapple Ginger and I got this. They had mango, but I decided that an aloe with noni would be better. Before we get to the drink, let's talk about the food. It was awesome. I got a veggie patty and a curry chicken Roti, which is like a Jamaican burrito. It was spicy in all the right ways and was so good. I will be returning. Now we turn to the drink.

A noni is some sort of fruit. I've never had it before. Aloe is something I am very familiar with, but not like this. It's a good black tea, lightly sweetened, but mostly flavored by the aloe. There are no chunks, which makes it different from what you would expect. I like the chunks, but this is a lot more drinkable. Still, a bit deceiving after all the chunky, delicious aloe drinks. Also, before I forget, for no reason in particular, there is a nice little list of factoids about Buffalo. I don't know why it's there but I have to love this drink that much more because of my city price.

So it's a good tea mixed with good flavors and has tidbits of information about the city I love. Win.

Yesterday, the highly anticipated Trials Evolution was released. I invited twenty-five people over, nine of which did. We ate pizza including one "hot dog stuffed crust" pizza that was not as good as it should have been. I blame it on the veggie dogs, but it's obvious that's what did it. Not the fact that it was a hot dog stuffed crust pizza. We drank pop that I always get when I have large gatherings. We played video games. Into the night we raced together, screaming at the TV and at each other. It was wonderful.

My brother brought this tea. I don't know where he got it as I always have my eyes open when I'm in stores and have never seen this line. He reluctantly let me have some as he brought it for himself, which doesn't apply in the walls of a Thirsty Dude house. If we haven't reviewed it, we get a sip. Let it be known. Everything has to be reviewed and everything will be reviewed, regardless of whom the drink is for.

This drink was a fraction better than I thought it would be. The problem with "sweet tea" is that when mass-produced, nine times out of ten it sucks. I'll say it. Corn syrup ruins sweet tea and if anything, you're just making sweetened tea. "Sweet Tea" is a term that should be reserved for true sweet tea. I can't hammer that home enough. This actually did have a legit black tea taste, although more syrupy than desired. It wouldn't make a Southern mom happy, but it would make a poor college kid happy. Based on sheer quantity, I think they might be on the right track.

Wawa: The Pride of Pennsylvania. Now that's a slogan the state should look into. Sure I know there are Wawa stores in a couple other states, but I always associate it with PA, specifically Philadelphia. They are truly something to be proud about as well. I've been in an obscene amount of gas stations, mini marts and convenient stores in my day and I can safely say that Wawa falls in the top three greatest I have ever been in. The greatest of their achievements is their ever-expanding line of iced teas. They are a made with real sugar and actual brewed tea, something to boast about in the world of store brands. My most recent trip to Philly was the first time I had seen this flavor there. I quickly grabbed it and some soft pretzels and made my way for the door (well after paying of course). Once outside I clicked a quick picture and downed most of the bottle with my salty bread products. It was a wonderful combination. The surprising thing about this tea is how much it actually tastes like tangerines. I've had a few tangerine flavored drinks in my time and I have to say this is one of the more authentic tasting ones. The goose has shown us the way once again.

Sometimes I feel dumb reviewing things everyone in the world has had but then I think that someone out there wants to hear what I have to say about something that they know rather than something that they don't know. I will say this; iced tea should not let out an audible "psst" when you open the cap. There is nothing in iced tea that is natural that should do that so it's either their high pressure sealing technique or something else but I don't like it. I do think that this is light years better than their regular Brisk. That stuff is undrinkable. I feel that the raspberry kind of takes the edge off a bit. Raspberry is the mediator between good and evil.

This came in a giant bottle for a dollar and that's a bit much. I would have paid more for less if the quality were there. I have done it before and would do it again. Look, I know this isn't anything that people don't know and think every day like "tacos are delicious" but I'm putting it out there so someone reads it and turns things around. No one would be offended if Lipton dropped the Brisk line all together and focused on their PureLeaf or 100% Natural line because this tea is cheap garbage. I mean that in the nicest way, Lipton.

The rainy season is slowly fading away here in Portland and the sun is starting to show its face. What this means for me is more porch hangouts. Hanging out on the porch with friends and a tasty drink is how I love to spend nice days. This is a great drink for that. At first I was disappointed that the ginger (yes, they use REAL ginger) wasn't burn your mouth strong. But then half way through the bottle I noticed my lips were tingling. It's one of those subtle ginger burns that you don't notice right away. If this didn't have the ginger in it, it would be a pretty boring and weak iced tea. The ginger is what makes it delicious.

Cheap Girls are an alt-rock/indie band from Lansing, MI. After a recent show in Buffalo on their tour with The Sidekicks Ian, Ben and Adam were nice enough to do a guest review for us after we got calzones at 3am. Their newest album, Giant Orange is out now on Rise Records. It, along with their other two full lengths are a must have.



ps. To me this tea tasted the way an old bag of weed smells. It also tastes like rope, like most hemp drinks.

When I was in high school a bunch of my friends and I stopped by a grocery store for some provisions for a night of hanging out in the woods. Okay the woods were actually the fields at the end of one of the kid's street, but there were a bunch of trees and we had a totally sweet hang out spot. I don't remember what I got to drink, but I can assure you that I purchased a huge loaf of Italian bread. I can also assure you that I ripped off the top, hollowed out a bit of it, filled that space with bulk candy and then popped the top back on. What can I say; I was poor and a thief. Sue me. My purchases aren't the important point of interest here. The important thing is that my one friend bought a jug of loganberry drink. He was so stoked because it was in this huge jug. When we got down to the fields he opened it up took a huge sip and immediately spit it everywhere. You see he wasn't the most observant kid, and he failed to notice that the jug was a concentrate and not ready to drink. He was probably supposed to mix in a gallon of water or so with the amount he gulped. I bring this up because as I took a sip of this I had a similar reaction. I didn't spit it out, but I was fairly sure it was a concentrate. Nope. This is just ridiculously sweet and ridiculously strong. I don't mean that in a good way either. I really only made it maybe ¼ of the way through the bottle, and it got less intense the more I drank, but it still didn't taste very good, hence my dumping the rest. White tea normally has a very specific taste to it, but with all of the added sugar in this you can't even tell. This would be any type of tea, or just sugar water and you would never know the difference. It also contains 1% juice, which is laughable. That juice is pomegranate, and it just tastes like some sort of pomegranate syrup that would be put on a snow cone.

Not only was this gross, but it also was 1.5 liters of gross. That is 1.4 more liters of grossness than I needed to know I didn't want any part of it.

Finally the world has combined tea and coffee into a single drink. Only the finest coffee beans and tealeaves are used to create this unholy alliance. Oh wait, no that is wrong. This drink actually has nothing to do with coffee at all. It has java in its name solely because the tealeaves they use to brew this from on the island of Java. To be honest I am actually relieved. I don't think I would really like a hybrid drink. I mean sure I would drink it, and I bet tons of people would actually love it, but I can't see it being for me, especially if it was unsweetened. This drink on the other hand is wonderful because it's unsweetened. They microbrew the precious Java tea leaves and that is that. There is absolutely no reason for them to mask the taste of this tea, and they know it. It is the best tasting unsweetened black tea I have ever tasted. It has the subtle bitterness of unsweetened tea, but it is also very, very smooth. It's incredible flavorful, and it tastes like it is made from some specialty tea that would cost way too much from a store in the mall. Well done Tejava.

Concentrates are a daring thing. The companies put their trust in you to mix accordingly and not mess it up. The directions are always clear and it's a good thing. The last thing the company wants is for you to not read the directions and slam a big mouthful of overpowering syrup. Kids like to do that, though. Kids thick they're so tough. Oh, you mixed Kool-Aid in an appropriate, eight ounce glass? That's cool. I made a packet of it in a shot glass. That's what companies are afraid of.

Since I am quasi-responsible, I mixed the appropriate amount in a glass and brought it back to the table. It's early, not terribly, but it's early. I didn't want something super strong that was going to destroy my precious teeth. I don't like peaches the fruit, but I do like this drink. It's a great iced tea that tastes like something that I didn't mix with my bare hands. It didn't taste like I made it with my bare hands because I used a spoon but the mix is pretty good. It had a very fruity peach taste and the tea was crisp. Thank you "real" sugar.

I used four tablespoons and I have so much more left in that bottle. This is a wise investment that you will never look back on. Enjoy your time with peach iced tea, friends.

Mole people are a crafty, busy bunch. Sure, they live in subways and don't shower and have many rats that they call family. That is their "con" column. Their "pro" column is filled with all sorts of resourceful, ingenious strategies that allow them to live how they do. Mole people are the ones that make this Tradewinds iced tea. You might think that it's impossible but in a land like ours, anything is possible. They all use their specialized skills and networking techniques to get the ingredients they need to meet the request of this tasty beverage.

Green Tea: Ever go into a Chinese food restaurant and find that they have free tea available? It's never bad, either. Why? Why would China skimp on one of their most prized exports? Green tea is simple enough to make and getting it direct from the source is the best way. The mole people create a sort of endless line of people to come into the restaurant, get a cup of tea, and bring it back to the "mixing headquarters." The people that work at the Chinese restaurant are not stupid and they see what's happening, but they know that their tea is being used for something great and they are fine with it.

Sugar: There are thousands of coffee shops in the metropolis that the mole people live in. Every day, much like the "Tea Getters", the "Sugar Getters" make multiple stops to get sugar packets from different coffee shops. They only get real sugar, too. They are instructed to only get real sugar or else they are off "project Tradewind." This job gives them a purpose and also puts food on the table so they oblige and only get real sugar.

Honey: This task is only for the most stealth and crafty as it involved stealing. The "Honeymen" go to stores and go into the condiment aisle where the honey is located. They look around to ensure that no one is watching and squeeze as much honey as they can into their pockets. Their pockets have been previously lined with plastic sandwich bags so as to eliminate any germs. They squeeze and if they are caught, they are instructed to run and drop a $5 bill. This way, even if they are caught, the sales associate that would have caught them sees the money and calls it even.

All of these ingredients are brought to the "Mixing Headquarters" where it is loaded into trucks and taken away by the people that manage "Project Tradewinds." They work their magic and that's how you find inexpensive, delicious tea on the shelves. It's a nice, natural tea taste with the smallest amount of bitterness and a great honey taste. Next time you see it, remember that the proceeds go to those less fortunate that help make your tea.

If you were a teenage slacker in the 90's like I was, you probably made several trips a day to a corner store/mini mart. They were a right of passage for our kind. It was somewhere to waste time and get junk food; a win-win situation. I drank more Brisk in my day than anyone probably should. I didn't know better. I was young and new to the iced tea game. I thought Brisk was great. I would have drunk it by the gallon if it was available in that large of a quantity. Basically, I was an idiot. Now I'm a grown ass man and I am a bit of a tea coinsure. I understand that Brisk is garbage tea. Actually, it probably shouldn't even be classified as tea, as it's more sugar than actual tea. Is there even any real tea in Brisk? That being said I haven't touched the stuff in quite a while.

Last week Mike and I went on a little shopping spree at a local super market to pick up some of the more common drinks that we have overlooked thus far for Thirsty Dudes. I ended up with this bottle of peach green tea Brisk. I knew it was going to be pretty gross, and at a liter it was going to get continuously worse. I drank it throughout the day at work and I was pretty spot on. I checked the ingredients and there is no mention of actual tea in it at all. The peach flavor is super intense. It doesn't taste like real peaches at all. It tastes like those gummy peach rings in the bulk section. It's basically fake peach flavored sugar water. Since it doesn't contain actual tea, it's not surprising that it doesn't taste like green tea. I would actually say that their version of green tea is really just a lighter version of their normal tea, which kind of remotely tastes like tea. Lipton I know you have it in you to make some quality teas. I'm tasted them and they are great. I think it's time you put the Brisk line to rest. You're better than it. You know it. I know it. The whole world knows it.

Tina had had enough of her restless nights. She was a busy woman and she needed to be at the top of her game. You see she was in the middle of a big job at work that required her to be at the lab at 6am and she was sometimes there as late as 11pm. Whenever her friends complained about working too much, or being tired, all she had to do was shoot them a look and they would shut up immediately. Originally she had drunk coffee to help her stay alert, but her body became accustomed to it, and it stopped working well. She then moved onto your everyday energy drinks, but she really was never comfortable with all of the artificial garbage in them. On top of that they gave her the jitters and they also kept her up during the few hours that she actually had for sleeping. She was a mess and her research was suffering because of it. Then one day on one of her brief and rare breaks she wandered into a health food store and saw this little bottle of Guayaki. The bold pink letters of “Yerba Mate” stood out to her like the bat signal in the night sky. An all natural, organic drink that would work the way an energy drink should without advertising as being one. On top of all of that it was grapefruit and ginger flavored. It tasted like a typical yerba mate tea, you know earthy and bitter with a coating of agave and Stevia laden grapefruit juice to mix things up a bit. It was a bit more diety than she had hoped, but for an all natural energy drink that wouldn't make her feel crazy, she was happy to deal with it. She had also hoped that there would be a little kick from the ginger, but alas there was not. It only appeared in the faintest form of flavor. That day the gods looked down upon Tina and bestowed their grace upon her for her excellent work in the field of hotdog milkshakes. Her research would soon propel the world into a utopia where hotdogs and ice cream were properly fused into one glorious dessert drink.