Diet - 615 Reviews

I believe there is a flaw in the basic nature of this beverage. How I see it is that you would want to drink an energy drink prior to doing strenuous activity that would require hydration. Wouldn't you want that extra boost to help you push through whatever it is that you're doing? Does added hydration do anything previous to any sort of workout? I suppose you could sip this while you are in the process of whatever it is that you are doing. Would the energy boost hit you in time though? I certainly don't get it.

Another thing that I don't get is the flavor. Grape has got to be one of the easiest flavors ever (right along side orange), yet they have somehow messed it up with this. What little non-diet/energy flavor that is present almost tastes more berry than grape. Whatever it is, it's not very pleasant. It's certainly doesn't taste good enough to denote a 24oz can.

I'm going to stick to the one serving out of the three that are in this can, and introduce the rest to the drainage system in my house. It has no place in my person.

Do you have a fetish that consists of drinking liquid plastic until you reach a state of relaxation? You do? Well I did not expect you to answer that in the affirmative, but good news for you is that this drink is probably just what you have been looking for; a way to sate your compulsion but without being poisoned by it.

This 100% tastes like the most diet berry drink anyone has ever dreamt of. That beverage was then kept in some sort of plastic container, and the flavor of the plastic somehow seeped into the drink. The result is ridiculously diet tasting plastic.

In addition to tasting like nothing I want to consume, this is also a relaxation drink that will keep you calm without making you feel drowsy, like Marley Mellow Moods. In order to achieve that they use a blend of lemon balm, hibiscus, l-theanine, green tea, passion flower and a few other things.

So there you have it. You're rare fetish can now be explored anytime you wish. You just may have to head to Canada to pick some up.

Despite what Derek says I will always believe, and spread the word, that the name of this here website is derived from a Mitch Hedberg joke. “You don't have to be sweating and holding a basketball to enjoy a Gatorade. You can just be a thirsty dude. Gatorade forgets about this demographic. I'm thirsty for absolutely no reason, other than that liquid has not touched my lips for some time.” Funny? Yes. Truthful? Also, yes. Many times in my life I have drank a Gatorade or similar drink, while not in the throes of some physical activity. I was thirsty, it was a beverage that would solve my thirst, and on top of that it tastes pretty good.

With all of the above being said, I don't think I could ever see myself drinking one of these bottles of Cytomax for pleasure. It is a beverage with a specific function, and I think I will save it for that. Sure it's basically the same sort of beverage as Gatorade, but the difference is that along with crystalline fructose, stevia is also used as a sweetener in here. That just throws the whole thing off. It's citrus flavored in the way that popsicles are, but with the stevia it's like a natural diet popsicle. There is something inherently wrong with the idea of such a product existing. Since this is a performance beverage and not a frozen summertime treat, it is acceptable, but I wouldn't drink it just for enjoyment. I would drink it after spending some time on the court with that previously mentioned basketball though. That is it's intended purpose, so I suppose Cytomax has produced what it was aiming for.

I'm going to say that I haven't had a peach in two decades. I never cared for them. I don't like any food that could potentially get me messy and peaches and plums are at the top of that list.

I have had peach candy in the last twenty years and this tastes like peach candy. It's a lingering taste but the taste isn't bad so you don't mind it staying around, like that one last dude at a party that won't stop talking about his annoying neighbor. It's fun to hear about it but you have cups and plates scattered throughout your house and want to clean up and go to bed.

This flavor is better than the blackberry one because that one is pretty diet. Pretty diet indeed. This exchanges the diet for long lasting, indistinguishable peach flavor. It's a good trade.

The level of concentration in this is pretty intense. You use one drop per ounce. Looking into an empty cup with ten drops is surprisingly flavorful. It's probably two or three times more concentrated than the other liquid flavor bottles out there. Maybe they could team up. I think everyone could benefit from that partnership.

"Tastes like lemonade," sounds like trickery to me. Telling someone that something tastes like something else seems like a not-so clever way of sneaking something into someone. If they would have said this was their interpretation of lemonade, I would have been fine. Them saying on the bottle that this "tastes like lemonade" tells me that this isn't lemonade and it's not trying to be lemonade but still tastes like it.

Does this taste like lemonade? Yes. It tastes like lemonade with those delightful little chia seeds in it. I like them. I don't know if I ever didn't but for the record, I like them. They've got a little crunch but you have to get through the smooth jelly exterior first. Although it sounds gross, I like it and if you don't actively chew the seeds, you might be able to care a little less with the fact that something you're drinking crunches.

The Stevia taste is there and I could tell right away. It's not too offensive but it's worth pointing out that this is a low calorie drink that tastes like a low calorie. An important point is that they're not trying to disguise it as not being diet. They also go on to point out what feels like a thousand times that this contains things that are good for you. Great right? Eh. It's good.

I know we've beaten this concept to death, but I can't help it; this just makes me think of a goth vacation to a tropical location. Every year is Buffalo there is Goth Beach Day that some friends run. People don't really dress up, it's just a bunch of goths hanging out at the beach in swim suits. Sure there are more tattoos than the beach is used to, and a couple of parasols floating around, but it's nothing that is overly comical. The vision in my head is hysterical though. People getting ready in their hotel rooms, putting on their “club clothes” and makeup just to head out and do various activities on a tropical island. In my mind a couple of them even have platform boots on.

So it's a million degrees and it's humid as hell, as tropical locations are prone to be. The goths are sweating, makeup is running everywhere, and after hours of swimming, rafting and zip lining has left everyone feeling a bit dehydrated. Of course as a joke someone has had a couple cases of blk Tropical Punch shipped to the resort. It does its job of quenching everyone's thirst, but it doesn't taste very tropical. It tastes like a very watered down Hawiian Punch or some sort of Kool Aid that has been sweetened with stevia. It's the chosen sweetener that really puts everyone off. Goths aren't really known for watching their weight, so they aren't used to zero calorie sweeteners. The stevia is too distracting in something that has such a light flavor to begin with. It takes over and does a cannonball right in the hotel pool, drenching all of the velvet and lace that was nice and dry on land. It's a jerk like that.

It's dark out there. You should come inside before a badger eats you. Here, I've got something for you to drink since you love being outside at night so much. No, it's not cola. No, it's not root beer. Just try it. I know it's quite opaque. I saw it at the store and instantly thought of you. You always wear a black shirt, that's why. You love black. Is it too much to ask for you to wear a white shirt every once in a while? I'm not even asking you to wear something with colors. Just white. Go ahead and drink it. Why would your mother poison you? Come on. I want to see if you like it.

Almost like lemonade? What's that supposed to mean. Take another sip. Really? Can I have some? Thanks. You know what? You're right. I can see that there is some sort of lemonade in here but it almost seems like someone put black water into a glass that had like a quarter of the glass of lemonade in it. It's got Stevia in it, too so you don't have to worry about calories. You know what, though? The Stevia taste isn't so bad. Some of that stuff out there is pretty gross. This one is a bit bitter but it doesn't taste like those drinks I used to drink. Remember all those diet drinks I used to drink that you would take sips out of and would almost spit it out? Yes, I know. There was that one time you spit it out and we had to have the rug shampoo'd.

So what do you think? Yes or no? Eh? That's your review? That's a pretty lame, albeit teenage response. It tastes like it's supposed to taste but is black as the night. I thought you'd like it. Welp…€¦ better luck next time, son. Did you do your homework yet? No? Well get on upstairs. You can take your new goth lemonade with you.

Do you think there is anyone out there that collects iced tea? I mean is there a crazy person out there who purchases one of every type of iced tea they can find, but then never drink them? Perhaps they have an auxiliary house whose only purpose is to display a gigantic collection of unopened teas. Subquestion: would you be able to see the tea rotting if it came in a clear bottle?

If you know of a collector please tell him/her that Turkey Hill has a limited edition flavor out and they better hurry on over to PA to pick some up. Okay, if they are a real collector like you say they are then I'm sure they have their ear to the ground and they already know this exists. I'm just trying to he helpful, you don't need to get up in arms about it.

For you non-collectors out there who would actually drink this tea, it may be called “light,” but it's actually sweetened with a combination of real sugar and aspartame. The diet flavor is at a minimum, which leave drinking this tea and enjoyable experience. It's made with black tea, and the blueberry flavor is fairly bold. Oh it's also cheap as hell for such a large bottle. I recommend it to anyone who is a fan of middle grade iced teas.

If a company thinks that we might have gotten a bad bottle, or they change their formula, and they want to send us some samples to re-review it, we will. There is no guarantee that our review will improve, but we're willing to give it a shot.

I think Core Power was right to send us more of these. When Mike reviewed this he said that it was nice and chocolaty, but that it had a definite diet undertone. While I do notice the taste of stevia a bit, I feel it is far outshined by the chocolate. This is in fact the most accurately chocolate diet drink that I have ever tried. Even better is that it is a protein drink without the chalkiness. If you search it out you can taste the diet but it's certainly not punching you in the face. I really think this may be as good as it gets with diet.

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Old Review:

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Oh she's far down the list, she is, but thar she blows. Stevia. This is very chocolaty. It's just what you want, but with those four little letters, D.I.E.T. it changes the whole game. This tastes diet. It doesn't taste terrible like poison diet, but there is no beating around the bush. This is diet. I am typically on the fence when it comes to protein drinks but I think that it lends itself well to chocolate because chocolate shakes are eternally wonderful. You don't get any of that sandy stuff in this, which is a great thing.

All in all, this is a blatantly diet chocolate protein drink that is actually a tolerable attempt at being both diet and protein. Success? Yes. Success.

Are you tired of energy drinks all tasting the same (ie. like some candy Willy Wonka dreamt up)? Well Vemma has a solution for you with their “insanely healthy energy” drink. Now I have qualms with them saying this is actually healthy as I don't think it's helping your health at all by drinking it, but I will say that after perusing the ingredients list and seeing what is in it I will concede that it is a “healthier” version of an energy drink. It may not cure, nor prevent illness, but hey it's an energy drink and it's not supposed to.

The base of the drink is mangosteen juice, and its caffeine comes from green tea and aloe vera. It also has taurine and a bunch of B vitamins in it, but you take your health where you can get it nowadays. When you open the can it has a weird almost bubble gum smell, that I don't understand. I don't think I can actually taste it. I think I can, but I also believe that the smell may be planting subliminal flavors in my brain. Overall this tastes more like a weird juice than it does an energy drink, and that is a great thing.

This is also the more intense energy version of the beverage. I drank this around 1PM as I had to go to a family party, then another party, and then another. I didn't think I would make it through the day. I also knew if I drank this later in the day when I actually needed it I would never sleep. So I drank it early. Around 6PM I started to crash. I made it through, but then by 9PM I was back with a crazy second wind that was anything but natural. I hadn't had anything else caffeinated or anything like that, so I can only hold this drink accountable. I came back with a fury and I felt like I had drunk three Red Bulls. Luckily by the time I was ready for sleep around 2AM it had worn off and I passed right out. Now that's efficiency.

Can we all agree that Christopher McDonald is one of the greatest character actors of our time? On top of being a great actor, he also has come of the best character names in cinematic history. From Reed Standish to Travis Cole, he has perfect antagonist names. Of course who could forget Shooter McGavin? I could only think about him as I drank this. A man who takes breaks from the golf course to sell his line of misleading juice drinks. Misleading you say? Well the bottle clearly states “No Added Sugar,” yet the ingredients clearly show that it actually contains sucralose. I guess technically sucralose is not sugar, but it still is a sweetener, albeit a zero calorie one.

I'll tell you what, if they weren't a bunch of big fat liars and had omitted the sucralose, this would be a nice little drinks. Sure it has a bunch of added nonsense, but the base of it is a decent tasting juice. Raspberry juice is rare, although I would kill for a nice cold glass of pure raspberry juice to accompany my dream glass of cantaloupe juice. Mixed with the strawberry juice it's nice, and I think kids (who this is marketed toward) would really enjoy this. The reality is there is only 10% juice in here, but I could easily over look that if that pesky sucralose wasn't present. It may not be strong in the taste, but it's still there and annoying.

The tropics must have been going through a storm when this drink was made. You know the type that I'm referring to, the kind that blows garbage all over your lawn. You always say you're going to cut down those hedges because all they do is collect garbage and take up your limited front yard but every time you go in the shed to get a saw, you remember that you don't want neighbor dogs defecating on your yard. Well that garbage filled yard is like what this drink taste like: a diet tropical garbage citrus storm.

Right off the bat the Stevia is bastardizing whatever is in this bottle so I cannot get a good read of any flavors without being rudely interrupted by your highness. There might be a mango or a pineapple in here but I wouldn't know because, much like Adam Levine's number one biggest and fattest fan pushing her way up to the front of the crowd, Stevia is shoving it's way all over your poor taste buds.

Sometimes you wonder why drinks are on sale and then you drink things like this and realize why. Questions and answers wrapped into one cheap, 473ml bottle of diet sweetener.

Oh look, a lantern. It would be awesome if this was a...woah, it is a magic lantern. What's up, genie? Herb? Your name is Herb? Cool. I thought it would be something more, I don't know, majestic, but Herb is fine. Oh, oh, really? I get three wishes? This is awesome. I wish it were brighter in here so I could get around. I don't know how I got to this section of the castle. I was just checking my text messages and emails and walking aimlessly and ended up here. Oh...what the...that was a wish? I guess I did say, "I wish it was brighter." That one is on me, herb.

You know what? I'm thirsty. Could I have something to drink? No, what kind of a genie, oh, I get it. "I wish I could get something to drink. Woah. Do you have unlimited glitter? That's pretty cool. You'd be a hit in an art school. People would lay down some lines of glue and then all the kids would say, "I wish we had glitter!" and you would do your magic and art would happen.

Oh, you know what? I don't drink alcohol. Could I swap this with a non-alcoholic drink? What? I have to wish it? I have to say, "I wish this was non-alcoholic" for you to do it. That's...no...wait...come on! I just blew three wishes on light and one drink that I didn't want and one that I did want? This better be one heck of a drink, Herb. Ugh, what is this? You just took the alcohol out and left whatever else was in there? This is really bad. It's got a split second of candy sour apple and then it's just overwhelmingly terrible almost alcoholic tasting. It's kind of bitter like they might have used bad apples. Herb. Did you poison me? You didn't? Man, I wish you did. Wait...no!!!! Oh, I wasted my wishes. Now I'm kind of glad I wasted those because I would have just killed myself. Suicide by genie. That would be something. Thanks, Herb. Can you tell me how to get out of this castle? No? Alright, Herb. Thanks, I guess.

It as if nature knew I had bought this cider because it decided to drop the temperature twenty five degrees. All of a sudden, I want to just walk around wearing a hoodie with headphones on and not acknowledge anyone or anything, as I enjoy doing because I can be a bit of an introvert and sometimes enjoy when people think I'm just creeping around. I'm not, I just want everyone to leave me the hell alone for a little bit. If those same people knew that I was thinking of things like apple cider, they would probably be alright with me lurking around the city.

I rarely eat candy apples and eat caramel apples even less. Why? Well, a beard does not mesh well with a ball of sticky candy, for one. For two, they are impossible to eat on their own. I thought that if I got this I could drink the fall up in an old coffee cup. Was I right? Sure, if you are concerned about drinking all that fall has to offer and, even in your imagination are concerned about your weight.

This initially tastes very strong. The first two or three sips really taking some getting used to as this cat is a sweet treat if I have ever had one. Subsequent sips are a mix between a pretty good rendering of a liquid caramel apple and a rendering of a liquid caramel apple of your gluttonously and stupidly dipped your caramel apple into aspartame. Ahh, yes. The ingredient that we all loved in the early nineties but now venomously despise is back and hiding in our caramel apple drinks. The sweetener is very strong but the flavor of the cider is pretty good and close to it's model so I can only penalize it so much. It tugs me in both directions so much that I can only cop out and give it a three and wonder how long it's going to take me to get through the other seventeen K-Cups. Dilemma.

Does anyone else have second thoughts about drinking a beverage that pops when you twist off the cap and an eerie smoke pours out of the opening? I feel like I should be wearing a has mat suit with some thick gloves that you can handle uranium with. Essentially it makes me feel like this beverage should not exist outside of some lab somewhere.

Being as I am a scientist, specifically one with a degree in drinkology (no , not like some pretentious mixologist, I had to spend eight years in college to get my degree), I through caution of radioactivity to the wind an dove in head first. By that I mean I took a small tentative sip. I can safely say that this does not taste nuclear, and I have no fear of my pee coming out glowing later.

The strange thing about this beverage is that it is made with real orange juice (it's the second ingredient, but it's only 3% of the whole), yet it still tastes like Tang. Have they ever thought of marketing this as an energy drink for astronauts? I imagine that is exactly what space explorers do not need though. They're stuck up in orbit for months at a time with, what I expect is little to do for a good portion of their days. Why would they want to be all hopped up on energy drinks? I think I would like to sleep through as much as that experience as possible. So yeah, nix that idea.

As part of the recovery line this beverage is meant to give you energy as well as hydrate you. Think of it as Rockstar meets Gatorade with sexy results!!! Wait, that's not right. There is nothing sexy about this. It tastes like Gatorade made a Tang flavor and then they added a bit of an energy compound to it. It doesn't taste too much like chemicals, but it's there around the edges. Actually it's there in a way that makes it taste vaguely diet, even though it's sweetened with sucrose.

On a side note, while I do like the idea that it is in a resealable can, I have to say that about a third of the sips I took resulted in some sort of splash back that got on my clothes. Either they need to work on the design a bit, or I need to learn how to drink properly.

Did mango make some back door deal in order to blend so well with erythritol? While it is one of the least offensive zero calorie sweeteners on the market, it normally has a very distinct taste. When it's hanging around mango, it's not as apparent. Did they meet to exchange documents for cold hard cash in some dirty, dark parking garage? Did they use fake gruff voices until one of them inevitably coughed? Were Nixon masks worn? Was it all done to finance a surfing expedition? Find out the answers to all of this and more next week on the Adventures of Sneaky Pete (and Pete).

I have surprisingly been a fan of this line of beverages. The concept of oats, fruit juice and zero calorie sweeteners being mixed together didn't exactly produce a Pavlovian response from me. I guess that is because I haven't had the proper conditioning, which as it turns out simply means trying the drinks.

This tastes like a decent mango juice with a slight hint of erythritol, but as I said it's not all that bad. There is a very light oat taste to it as well. I originally expected some sort of texture, but it's as smooth as can be. The amount you taste the oats is similar to how any drink would taste if you drank it while hanging out in a horse barn. The association of the smell of that dwelling would impact your taste buds as much as the oats in this juice do.

Oh and the spoiler is that Pete is sneaky because he added oats to his drinks and you wouldn't know unless you were told. You should still watch the show though, from what I hear there will be “sexy results!!!”

Diet fruit punch should not exist in any form.

I like sparkling beverages and I love green tea. I also prefer lower calorie beverages when it's due to less sugar instead of zero calorie sweeteners. That is where Steaz went wrong. This would have been great with just a pinch of sugar, or better off no sweeteners at all. A sparkling unsweetened tea would be wonderful. Instead they used Erythritol, which is normally an okay choice for zero calorie sweeteners, but they seemed to have used ten times the recommended amount. The fluid in this can tastes more like sweetener than it does blood orange or tea for that matter. It would be bad enough, but still somehow acceptable if the diet taste was only there when you sipped it, but it leaves a long lasting diet aftertaste that lingers for minutes after each sip.

Steaz took a swing for the stars, and they unfortunately struck out. Actually the more I think about it I can hardly taste the blood orange at all. It's truly a shame.

I really, really wanted these to taste like something special. I wanted a ropey flavor, like you get with hemp iced tea. All I ended up with was a beverage that tasted very similar to diet Red Bull. That's not a bad thing at all. I actually prefer the diet version to the regular (an insane thing in my world with a hatred of all things artificially sweetened). It's just more of the same. Sure this has hemp seed extract in it, but it's not evident in the flavor.

I'm the very competitive world of energy drinks, where companies come and go all the time, this may have an edge with the pot leaf on the can. It will appeal to the stoners and kids out there who think they are getting away with something wrong by drinking it. It's just an image, but if that image helps them sell product, good for them.

Everyone knows that when training for space travel potential astronauts need to prepare their bodies for zero gravity as well as G-LOC (well to avoid it). G-LOC is when the intense amounts of gravity moves the blood away from the brain, which can cause a loss of consciousness. In order to prevent this the future space travelers take a couple of rides in a high G-Force centrifuge. Essentially it spins them around at ridiculous speeds to mimic the effects of a space launch. I can only assume it is not a pretty picture. I assume it's like a Tilt-A-Whirl times a thousand.

Now in order to prepare for the training Gamma Labs has created this product that gives the user energy, focus and endurance. All of which are important when spinning a million miles and hour until you no longer have blood in your head and you pass out.

Remember in the 80's when you could buy freeze dried food and the tagline was something like, “Eat like the astronauts!,” well now you can drink like the astronauts trainees. Do you know what astronauts drinks taste like? Well I'll tell you they taste like concentrated sour diet sugar. I measured out the water perfectly, like an astronaut would, and I have to say this is extremely strong in a way that makes it a little difficult to drink. More water, or less m ix would have treated me much better. I don't understand how this can be so sour, yet taste so much like sucralose. It's a mystery for the cosmos.

ps. The only place that Gamma Labs products have any connection to astronauts is in my head, which is quite full of blood at the moment, so I have no fear of losing consciousness, especially since I just drank some energy powder that will probably have me up all night.