Bolthouse Farms - 26 Reviews

Bolthouse Farms Raspberry Blood Orange

Bolthouse Farms Raspberry Blood Orange
So either there was a mishap with the labeling of this product, the people at Bolthouse have learned some crazy science that would make them masters at mixing fountain beverages, or the company employs warlocks. The reason for this is that the flavor listed on the bottle is Raspberry Blood Orange, yet the fruit it lists as making up the juice are blood oranges, apples, strawberries, cherries, and pomegranate. As you can see raspberries are not included in this bottle, yet without knowing the name of this juice I would have bet money that it included raspberries just from the taste. Okay at the very bottom in tiny writing it does say raspberry puree is used, but it's in the fine print, so I'm guessing like .05% of this is actual raspberry. That being said, this may taste more like raspberries than any other drink I have ever tried. Perhaps mixing strawberries and cherries tricks one mind into thinking it's a raspberry. I don't know, but I wish I did, because I would like to recreate it on my own. This juice is fantastic and it is exactly what I needed to drink while I'm dealing with this cold. Can someone come over and just squeeze blood oranges and raspberries directly in my mouth, because I seem to have drunk this entire bottle. I would also accept it if you brought several more bottles with you instead.
Rating
🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺
Categories
Juice
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Author
Jason Draper on 2/21/18, 3:31 PM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms 1915 Apple Romaine Cucumber Spinach Kale Lemon

Bolthouse Farms 1915 Apple Romaine Cucumber Spinach Kale Lemon
Do you see all of those flavors listed in the title of this drink? Well that is all that is in this bottle. There is absolutely nothing else, not even added water. It's juice plain and simple. I am a huge fan of the current juice craze. Sure it can be ridiculously expensive, so I don't indulge all of the time, but it is nice to know that people care about something healthy and simple and it's out there for the taking.

Remember when I mentioned the cost of juice? If not you should probably see a doctor because it was two sentences ago and you have a real problem with short term memory. Well, Bolthouse cold-presses their 1915 juices, just like those expensive companies do, except they charge about half the price. These are normally around $4 and they seem to be on sale a decent amount for $3, which is not bad at all.

This version of the juice is their “greens” output. Sure, when you think about it this contains the ingredients to a salad, and drinking a salad doesn't sound very appetizing, but I assure you that is not what this is like. Maybe if it had dressing included it would be. If that were the case I'm guessing a lot of people would vomit upon drinking it though. The lemon and apple in here give it enough of a fruity edge to balance out greens. You can still taste them, but in a good way. Not like you ordered a house salad with a blender at an Applebees. Is that on the menu still? This is a beverage you can feel good about drinking with no guilt and you don't feel like you're forcing it down for the sake of health. It's enjoyable all around.
Rating
🍾🍾🍾🍾🍾
Categories
Juice
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Author
Jason Draper on 3/13/17, 8:40 AM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms Berry Boost

Bolthouse Farms Berry Boost
Is it just me, or is 61 really a random number of berries to include in this juice/smoothie? I can only assume that testing was done to discover that this was the ideal amount, but it sounds completely arbitrary. Perhaps they had planned on using a nice even number, such as 60, and an executive said something along the lines of “people want more for their money, throw a single extra berry into each bottle.” I suppose it doesn't matter the quantity, all that matters is that the combination of blackberries, elderberries, raspberries, boysenberries, strawberries and blueberries makes this a delicious drink that is true to its name. Sure it has a base of apple juice and has 1/3 of a gross banana in it for texture/consistency, but neither of those flavors stood a chance against the wave of 61 berries that washes over your taste buds with each sip.

I could be crazy and imagining it, but I believe if I concentrate while I drink it that I can make out the individual flavors of the types of berries used. Blackberry and raspberry are the most at the forefront, but I'm pretty sure I can make out the others swimming around in there. To me that is a sign of a good beverage. I like it when there aren't many ingredients and you can taste them all…€¦ well except banana I never want to taste banana again as long as I live.
Rating
πŸ§ƒπŸ§ƒπŸ§ƒπŸ§ƒπŸ§ƒ
Categories
Juice and Smoothie
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Author
Jason Draper on 1/11/15, 4:42 PM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms Protein Plus Vanilla Bean

Bolthouse Farms Protein Plus Vanilla Bean
Due to a label that reads “New & Improved” and a flavor name that is similar enough to “Perfectly Protein Vanilla Chai Tea” I was pretty sure this was just a rebranding of one of their classic flavors. I mean even the image on the front is very similar.

The sad truth is that this is not the case. While the Vanilla Chai Tea flavor had a wonderful borderline soynog taste to it, this is more along the lines of a traditional protein drink. It has a very strong vanilla flavor, which is nice, but it also has a perhaps even heavier dairy flavor that I could do without. It's also very thick in a weird kind of way. It makes me think that I'm drinking something I shouldn't be for the sake of healing muscles, you know like when people eat raw eggs. This may not be as gross as that, but it's still a weird drink, especially for someone who doesn't consume much dairy.

Another weird note about this is that there are 40g of sugar in this bottle (mostly from cane sugar). That just seems counterintuitive for a protein drink to me.

I really hope they haven't discontinued the flavor I thought this was, because now that I think about it I don't think I've come across it in a while. That was one delicious flavor, and this just seems like a functional beverage that you would drink out of necessity and not out of want.
Rating
πŸ₯ƒπŸ₯ƒπŸ₯ƒπŸ₯ƒπŸ₯ƒ
Categories
Sports/Dietary Supplement
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Author
Jason Draper on 1/8/15, 9:50 AM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms Tropical Goodness

Bolthouse Farms Tropical Goodness
Dear Bolthouse,
Why did you hide that coconut all the way in the back of the image on this label? The way the fruits are arranged makes me think that this is going to pack a powerful fruit punch, with just a splash of coconut in the aftertaste. In reality this is mostly coconut water with some fruit flavor to it. I will give you that it has a thicker consistency than most coconut water, but the flavor is still there. Actually I will say this is 50/50 coconut water/juice. It's enjoyable, but it's just not what my taste buds were expecting.

Even with the coconut being stronger than I anticipated this is truly a tropical beverage. It's made up of coconut, guava, orange, banana, pineapple and dragonfruit. Get rid of that banana (you can't really taste it anyway) and that is a party I would be severely bummed if I wasn't invited to. All of those flavors blend into a new greatness that I can only assume most people would love to add rum to. Tropical fruit and rum go together, right? I mean if I understood everything correctly it's the official booze of desert islands. There is also “finely ground chia” in here, but it's so finely ground that I can't pick it out in the texture nor the flavor.

While this drink wasn't what I expected it to be going into it, it ended up being a nice ride that I will happily take again.
Rating
πŸ₯›πŸ₯›πŸ₯›πŸ₯›πŸ₯›
Categories
Coconut and Juice
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Author
Jason Draper on 1/3/15, 11:04 AM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms Limited Edition Watermelon Mint Lemonade

Bolthouse Farms Limited Edition Watermelon Mint Lemonade
Sometimes your friends pretend to be adults and throw a brunch. Is there anything more grown up then brunch? Most self-respecting kids and teenage malcontents would still be asleep during the brunching hour. In order to be a little more refined I decided I should not show up empty handed like common street trash and I brought this bottle of watermelon mint lemonade. What better way to celebrate an adult meal than with the adult version of a childhood favorite (no not Mike's Hard Lemonade, that's just for grown up children).

It was a nice warm summer day and this beverage fit the bill just nicely. It was refreshing, tasty and unique all at the same time. Let's deconstruct this for a second shall we? The lemonade base in here is nothing more than water, lemon juice and cane sugar. It's exactly what lemonade should be; a bit tart but also sweet. It's the flavor that inspired Wonka candy, okay that may not be true, but let's pretend that Senior Wonka was sipping on nice lemonade when he came up with the idea of Sweet Tarts. Back on track: So we have ideal lemonade to start with and then some watermelon juice is added. We're no fools and we know that watermelon is a hard flavor to capture. It's very distinct, but it's also watery, so adding it to other beverages tends to make them a bit watered down and the sought after flavor is lost. Bolthouse has found a way to make that flavor present. It may not be bold, but it's definitely there, and it does not detract from the lemonade, making it weak. Things are looking good. There is just one thing to add and that is a touch of mint. It's so easy to go overboard with mint and wind up with a beverage that tastes like you're drinking it while chewing five pieces of Wrigley in your mouth. It's lucky for us that Bolthouse knows restraint. The mint in here is very light. It's noticeable and gives the lemonade bit of a twist, but it doesn't just taste like a mint drink. Throughout this entire adventure the lemon juice has been driving the car, and it's not going to pull over for anything. No one is allowed behind the wheel of its baby, but it.

So what we have here is a perfect summer beverage that goes well with a tofu scramble, fresh fruit, bagels and donuts. Hey brunch doesn't have to be fancy, it just needs to come with a side of melon.
Rating
πŸ₯›πŸ₯›πŸ₯›πŸ₯›πŸ₯›
Categories
Lemonade
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Author
Jason Draper on 8/17/14, 11:22 AM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms Stone Fruit

Bolthouse Farms Stone Fruit
This is a stupendous idea that I can't believe hasn't been thought up before. With companies constantly reaching to find new pairings of flavors, this is a great way to group them together. I've never met a stone fruit that I haven't liked: peaches, plums, apricots, nectarines, and cherries. Heck, you can even through avocados into that mix, since they are technically a fruit (Bolthouse chose not to though). All of those are excellent fruits that I could eat all day long. Why not mix them all together?

This ended up being a good juice, but it didn't live up to the expectations that were swimming around in my brain fluids. The cause of this is the inclusion of other fruit juices. I understand that some fruits are more costly than others, and Bolthouse likes to keep their juice slightly lower priced than its competitors, so they use “filler fruit.” Pear, apple, and banana are used to round things out and make the drink a little sweeter while keeping it 100% juice. I would much rather this then adding sugar, or other ingredients to fill the juice out, but it does take away from the flavor a bit, making the whole thing a bit mellow.

I had expected the main flavor in the juice to be peach. It's a strongly flavored fruit, with a low price point. As it turns out the peach is there, but the apricot is carrying most of the flavor weight. One forgets how prominent apricots can be, the rest of the fruits kind of blend together. You can make them out if you concentrate, but it's mostly a general flavor. There is also some “finely ground chia” in here, but I don't think they effected the flavor at all, and you certainly can't feel them in the texture.

I enjoyed this, but I was hoping for something a bit more formidable with such heavy hitters of the fruit world.
Rating
🍾🍾🍾🍾🍾
Categories
Juice
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Author
Jason Draper on 5/19/14, 10:14 AM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms Multi-V Goodness

Bolthouse Farms Multi-V Goodness
Over the summer (it seems so long ago) I was leaving to go out of town for a bit, and I had some assorted fruit that needed to be eaten or else it would go bad. A handful of it was in the stages where it would still taste fine, but the texture would be far to soft for me to enjoy properly, so I decided to make a smoothie from it all. I sliced it all up, and through it in a blender with some ice and juice. I had apples, strawberries, and raspberries, even a mango. The thing is that all of those flavors went out the window when I added a handful of cherries to the mix. After that all I could taste in the smoothie was that wonderful red fruit, and you didn't hear a single complain about it.

This juice tastes extremely similar to my concoction. It has a general fruit base, but then you get blasted in the face with a punch of cherries. The only difference is that right underneath the cherry taste in here you get a bit of cranberries. So you get socked in the nose by cherries, the cranberries then slaps you, all followed with some verbal taunts from a general fruit mixture that really could be anything at all and it completely inconsequential. It abuse by fruit, and I would have it no other way. I suppose that makes me a fruit masochist. Lucky for me it's chock full of vitamins and fiber, so I will experience a quick recover before I return for more of a beating.

Rating
🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺
Categories
Juice
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Author
Jason Draper on 1/22/14, 2:36 PM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms Limited Edition Peppermint Mocha

Bolthouse Farms Limited Edition Peppermint Mocha
Dear Everyone,

We all agree that candy canes aren't very good, correct? The flavor is just okay, and there is too much substance to them, at least for a mint. On top of that at some point in their consumption they become flat out messy. Sticky faces, sticky hands, or worse yet, sticky gloves. They just aren't worth it. I mean if you absolutely need that flavor in your life, which I highly doubt anyone does, just eat a starlight mint. I understand the holiday esthetic has a lot to do with this particular candy persevering, but some on. Enough is enough.

The reason for the above rant is because this tastes like someone brewed some coffee with the wrong proportions of grounds to water, and while it was still the temperature of the sun they melted a handful of candy canes into it. It's something that a dumb kid would do. Let's be honest here, it's something I would have done when I was a kid…€¦or you know in the past couple of weeks, just to see how it would work/taste. After that they duped some cocoa in it and way too much milk. The result is that this has a base of a very weak coffee with not enough chocolate in it to make it taste like a real mocha. The peppermint flavor just sits on top of everything like it owns the place. Lucky for us this jerk is only seasonal and he won't be mucking up our drinks for much longer. I mean sure it definitely has a Christmassy taste to it, but it just could have been done better.

Bolthouse products are normally better than average, but they haven't been doing that good of a job getting the recipes right for these seasonal flavors. Don't worry your regularly scheduled programs will be on soon.
Rating
πŸ₯ƒπŸ₯ƒπŸ₯ƒπŸ₯ƒπŸ₯ƒ
Categories
Coffee
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Author
Jason Draper on 12/30/13, 1:39 PM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms Limited Edition Pumpkin Spice Latte

Bolthouse Farms Limited Edition Pumpkin Spice Latte
My ladyfriend works at Starbucks and come early fall the customers their lose their minds. People are constantly asking about their pumpkin spice lattes and then they will be available. It got so bad that I think it was actually released early this year. I've had them before and I think they taste decent enough, but I don't understand the power it has over people. It paints two images in my head; the first is that of zombies wanting nothing more out of life than sweet, sweet brains and the other is junkies wanting nothing more out of life than their sweet, sweet fix. All three things are sweet, sweet, so it's fitting.

This year Bolthouse Farms decided to release a limited edition seasonal line of beverages. The first one I saw hit the shelves was their take on the pumpkin spice latte. While I don't think this will have the same effect as the other does on the patrons of said coffee shop, it just may be enough to hold them over. I don't know why it would need to hold them over though, since they are both seasonal, and available at the same time.

In it's purest form this is a coffee beverage made with Arabica coffee. For me the problem is in the fact that there is way more milk in here than coffee. Yes, I know that's what a latte is, but I'm used to the soy variety, so this is a lot of milk for me to handle. So yeah, they take this coffee flavored milk and then add some spices and real pumpkin puree. I assure you that you can most definitely taste the pumpkin in this. There are a whole slew of pumpkin flavored products on the market these days, and most of them just taste like the spices that are used in a pumpkin pie. This taste more like the actual pumpkin, and it's interesting. As a side effect of that the amount of spices in here are lower than I would prefer, but you take what you can get in this crazy world of fancy beverages.

My final diagnosis is that if this contained more coffee, more spices and was soy based instead of primarily dairy based it would be one hell of a drink. Of course it would probably be a different drink entirely, but I know what the body wants and now so do you.
Rating
🍾🍾🍾🍾🍾
Categories
Coffee and Milk
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
Agave Nectar
Author
Jason Draper on 12/19/13, 1:55 PM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms Tropical + Carrot

Bolthouse Farms Tropical + Carrot
Oh tropical fruit how I love you. I just can't get enough of passionfruit, guava and…€¦pears? Wait…€¦what? Since when are pears a tropical fruit? I grew up in Western New York and my next-door neighbor had a pear tree in her backyard. I can assure you without a shadow of a doubt that I do not live in a tropical location. The snowstorm we are currently in can attest for that. So why is there a picture of a pear on this label? I guess it could be some special kind of tropical pear, but the ingredients just say pear, so I imagine it's just a run of the mill pear. I know that not all of the fruit in here is tropical, there are also apples, but maybe they should have switched out that pear image for an orange. At least they are quasi tropical.

Whatever the deal is with the pear, it's unimportant when it comes to the taste of this juice. It does in fact taste tropical with an underlying vegetable flavor of the carrots. It's not very strong, and this tastes way more like a fruit juice than anything, but you can definitely taste a little something extra going on.12.5 carrots were murdered in the making of this drink, yet the ¾ of a passionfruit that was also brutally slain is far more present in the flavor. The tropics win again root vegetables, like they always will, like they always should.
Rating
🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷
Categories
Juice
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Author
Jason Draper on 12/15/13, 12:13 PM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms Daily Greens

Bolthouse Farms Daily Greens
I finally decided to start reading the Walking Dead comics. I've watched the television show, and have enjoyed it for what it is, but I really enjoy the comics. I'm about halfway through the run so far, and without giving away too many spoilers they have a garden. It's garden season in real life as well, and tons of my friends are all excited about it. There is a certain greatness to growing your own food, and when the apocalypse is upon us I'm sure I'll be doing some myself, but at this moment of readily stocked grocery stores, I don't have the patience to keep up with a garden. We had a semi decent garden at our house last year (that I planted, but others took care of) and one thing I noticed was that the vegetables it produced didn't have all that long of a shelf life when not refrigerated. Now the folks in the comic have a gigantic garden to provide most of their sustenance, but what happens at the end of the season? They are going to be stuck with a whole mess of food that is going to rot away as there is only so much food that you can consume. What a bummer. Note to self: winter during the apocalypse is probably the worst thing ever. It's freezing, it's boring and there is no fresh food. I bet 95% of post apocalypse deaths occur during the winter; natural and suicide related.

So here I am drinking this juice thinking about food wasting away at the end of the world. I'm having a real upbeat day. I did figure that juicing some of your leftover vegetables would probably be a good option. It would still go bad, but probably not as fast, and for those who want to forget the woes of Armageddon it would probably turn alcoholic.

When that time comes for me I shall use this bottle of Bolthouse Farms as a beginning blueprint for how to make my juice. Actually I will use it more for reference on what not to add to it. Number one on the “no fly” list would be celery. Sure it has a couple of benefits, but I don't think they will be necessary in the environment I'll be in and the flavor of this particular vegetable is just too overpowering. There is only 1/3 of a cup of celery in this bottle and it's all I can smell/a good deal of what I can taste. Secondly I wouldn't add much fruit to it. I would leave the fruit for it's own juice, leave it out of my vegetables. Sugary vegetables are not for me, especially the green variety; I want to be able to taste their leafiness.

So what Bolthouse has is a juice that is a bit too sweet for a vegetable juice and a little heavy on the celery side. Remove those problems and what you would have is the base of this, which is a delicious leafy mixture of kale, spinach, romaine and cucumber with a hint of lemon to add a little something-something. It has a bunch of vitamins in it and it's pretty healthy for you. That celery though, man that just kind of ruins it all for me. Now back to reading about people, because that is what the Walking Dead really boils down to: a story about how people interact that just happens to be in a zombie ridden world.
Rating
πŸ₯ƒπŸ₯ƒπŸ₯ƒπŸ₯ƒπŸ₯ƒ
Categories
Juice
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Author
Jason Draper on 6/12/13, 1:23 PM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms Green Tea Soy Latte

Bolthouse Farms Green Tea Soy Latte
I've had chai lattes. I've had yerba mate latte. I've even had a straight up black tea latte, but never in my days have I had, or even thought about a green tea latte. The idea of adding a cream substance to green tea just seems completely foreign to me. The taste of green tea is so specific in my mind that I couldn't fathom it being creamy. I just looked it up and apparently this is a normal thing in coffee shops. Guess I've just been unobservant as always.

This is basically just soy milk, matcha green tea and cane sugar, and it's wonderful. It tastes like what I would imagine vegan green tea ice cream would taste like. Now that I think of it, I have had green tea ice cream in the past, so I guess I have had creamy matcha. It definitely tastes like a culmination of its ingredients and it's wonderful. This was my first time seeing this in a store, and I hope it becomes available in the big bottles, because I love it and it makes me feel sophisticated for some reason. Looks like I'll have to break on the monocle and spats.
Rating
πŸ§ƒπŸ§ƒπŸ§ƒπŸ§ƒπŸ§ƒ
Categories
Iced Tea
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Author
Jason Draper on 5/4/13, 2:15 PM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms Protein Plus Mango

Bolthouse Farms Protein Plus Mango
Perry had decided to become a vegetarian a few months ago. He was still in high school, but he knew it was the right thing for him to do. He loved animals. He didn't want to eat them. Every time he thought about eating meat Gorilla Biscuits would pop into his head;
”Cats and dogs have all the luck.”

At first it was hard. His parents didn't think he was serious, so they wouldn't buy him special food. As a result he ended up eating a lot of the vegetable side dishes his mom made for dinners and a whole mess of peanut butter sandwiches. After a month, they saw that he was serious and started buying him veggie burgers and the like. His mother was also concerned that he wasn't going to get all of the vitamins and minerals that he needed out of his diet. She always went on and on about how he wasn't getting enough protein. She would buy him protein energy bars all the time. When Bolthouse came out with their Protein Plus line she took it as a sign and bought some for Perry. It's every mother's dream to have her kids drinking juice with no sugar added and with a whole mess of protein in it.

At first Perry was put off by it. The whey protein in the drink gave it an almost chalky consistency. It was unlike anything he had ever drunk before. It also kind of tasted like someone dumped a carton of heavy cream into some mango puree. It was like a chalky mango creamsicle. After he drank about half of the bottle Perry became acclimated to it. The fruit flavor started to shine through more and the dairy aspect of it faded into the background. It got to the point where he down right enjoyed the drink. When he was finished he was a bit upset and he couldn't wait until the next time his mom would go shopping. Even though he had learned online that the foods he was eating were giving him more than enough protein, he wasn't about to tell him mom that she was a big dummy. If she wanted to buy him fancy “candy bars” and juices who was he to complain?
Rating
🍾🍾🍾🍾🍾
Categories
Juice and Sports/Dietary Supplement
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Author
Jason Draper on 6/28/12, 10:54 PM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms 50/50 Berry

Bolthouse Farms 50/50 Berry
Most drinks are "moons" or "goochers." Either they are all one general ingredient, or they are another. Bolthouse takes superstitious omens very seriously so they started making a line that is four servings of fruits and four servings of veggies. It's an even split so you don't have to worry about wiping out in your car on Weed Hill in Durham.

To be fair this is mostly fruit, as is evident in the flavor. The only veggie contained is the purple carrot. It is the first ingredient though, so there is as much of that as there is every fruit combined. Luckily it doesn't show up much, if at all, in the flavor. It really is just the berries that stand out. A nice mixture of blackberries, raspberries and blueberries. You can make out each berry in the mixture, which I always appreciate.

You still have a long walk ahead of you, so you better get moving. Sing some songs. Make some jokes. You're young, with your friends and summer is almost over. Make the most of it.
Rating
🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷
Categories
Juice
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Author
Jason Draper on 10/19/11, 11:39 AM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms Perfectly Protein Hazelnut Latte

Bolthouse Farms Perfectly Protein Hazelnut Latte
In the middle ages, times were tough. You had to raise your own fruits and vegetables, people got sick and died from things like a cough, and there weren't any Burger Kings. Not to mention, periodically, you had to be ready and the drop of a hat for a dragon invading your tiny town. On the plus side, you got to use your sword and were encouraged to at any given time. Throw it. Cut up fruit for dinner. Who cares? Every use is one step closer to being able to kill orcs and wild boars. For protein and energy, you have to eat mutton and probably nuts. I doubt that the meats are carefully marinated and are probably pretty bland. That's no good for anyone.

I would like to be the time traveler that brings a case of Bolthouse Farms to these people. I would be treated with so much respect. I am not going to go as far as being knighted, well maybe, but I would at least get a nice jacket or something. Perhaps I can have the local cobbler make me a nice pair of wingtips. That would be real nice of him. I would say to him, "Dear cobbler. I'm going to call you by your name, Mitch, because "cobbler" is your job and that's a jerk move. Mitch, I bequeath to you a case of Hazelnut Latte Bolthouse Farms drink. It tastes like a melted Arby's jamoca shake and is delicious. You don't know who Arby's is? It's a fast food restaurant that specialized in roast beef sandwiches. Roast beef, not roast beast. I don't know. It could be the same thing. Either way, this is delicious and will give you the botulism free energy you need to both make shoes and boots and shoot arrows at rabid animals. It is yours. Enjoy. Yes, they do make other flavors. What, is this not good enough for you? I come one thousand years back in time and you want variety? Mitch. Come on, dude."

Mitch is a good guy, he just doesn't have the manners one would expect from an adult man. He would take the drink, eventually love it, and be chocked full of energy. I wish him the best of luck with his footwear company and am anxiously awaiting my shoes. I told him to bury them in the ground at a specific location in a nice box so that I can dig them up. They'd better fit.
Rating
🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺
Categories
Coffee
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
Agave Nectar
Author
Mike Literman on 9/28/11, 2:12 PM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms Bom Dia Coconut Splash Tropical Mango

Bolthouse Farms Bom Dia Coconut Splash Tropical Mango
I could write a big long story about living in the tropics and coming across this heavenly drink that quenched my thirst, but instead I'm going for the no b.s. review today.

This drink is amazing! Plain and simple. This is easily the best coconut water drink I have ever had. It's light and creamy and is full of so much flavor. Of the 4 juices in this (lemon, apple, mango, and passion fruit), the apple and mango stand out the most with hints of lemon and passion fruit in the after taste. I had a feeling this drink was going to be good since Bolthouse rarely disappoints, but I didn't know it was going to be THIS good.
Rating
🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷
Categories
Coconut and Juice
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
Stevia
Author
Derek Neuland on 9/7/11, 3:19 PM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms Mango Lemonade

Bolthouse Farms Mango Lemonade
I've said it before and I'll say it again 2011 is the summer of lemonade. The amount I have consumed it absolutely ridiculous. I can't believe it has taken me so long to try the Bolthouse Farms version, as I am a huge fan of their beverages. Wrap your brain grapes around that.

This is thicker than most lemonades. It doesn't have the consistency of a smoothie, but it's way denser than your average glass of lemon water. The thickness is due to the mango puree they use to flavor it. It really is a perfect blend of lemon and mango. It's more of a breakfast drink. I can see waking up making a nice large breakfast and settling down on my nonexistent back porch to enjoy it with a glass of this lemonade.
Rating
πŸ§ƒπŸ§ƒπŸ§ƒπŸ§ƒπŸ§ƒ
Categories
Juice and Lemonade
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
Evaporated Cane Juice
Author
Jason Draper on 8/21/11, 11:55 AM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms Protein Plus Strawberries + Yogurt + Granola

Bolthouse Farms Protein Plus Strawberries + Yogurt + Granola
I actually had this a few weeks ago, but I was so disgusted by it that I left the bottle somewhere. Where to begin? How about by listing three things I love? Strawberries. Yogurt. Granola. One would think that by mixing them all together you would have awesomeness x's 3. One would also be wrong, just like this drink. It's a crime against nature that such great ingredients when mixed together would turn out so terribly. It tasted sour. I checked the expiration date and it had not passed. I also bought it from the grocery store, went home where I immediately put it in the fridge. No more than eight hours later I took it out and drank it. By drank it I mean took three sips before giving up. I shook it properly and everything. It's just not good. It's the only product Bolthouse has put out that I haven't loved. To add insult to injury there wasn't even chunks of granola in it like I had expected. It had all been blended together into a smooth liquid. Lame.
Rating
🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺
Categories
Sports/Dietary Supplement and Yogurt
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Author
Jason Draper on 5/12/11, 7:35 PM
Share
Direct Link

Bolthouse Farms Perfectly Protein Vanilla Chai Tea

Bolthouse Farms Perfectly Protein Vanilla Chai Tea
Bolthouse Farms is one hell of a company. I think I have tried all of their flavors, and there hasn't been a single one that I did not enjoy. The chai in this is present, but not overpowering like it is in some other beverages. It tastes vaguely like a chai latte. Due to the soymilk and spices in this, it also reminds me of a lite version of Silk Nog. The vanilla is pretty great as well. Another nice aspect of it is that it's not gritty like most protein drinks.
Rating
🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺
Categories
Iced Tea
Company
Bolthouse FarmsWebsite@BolthouseFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
Naturally Sweetened
Author
Jason Draper on 1/19/11, 12:36 PM
Share
Direct Link