Water (132 reviews)
Glaceau Vitamin Water Revive
Oh the original line of Vitamin Water. How many bottles of you have I downed over the years? Dozens? Of course. Hundreds? Certainly. Thousands? Now that might be pushing it.
You see for years I had chronic stomach pain. I would wake up fine, but by the time I went to sleep at night I was in intense pain. I went to the doctor in 2001 to get it checked out and he gave me some pills. They worked a bit, but my insurance ran out and I didn’t go back to see a doctor for over a decade. I learned to live with the pain. Then I went on tour in Europe and after a few days I noticed the pain was subsiding. By the time I headed back to the States it was gone. The first thing I did when I got home was to grab a slice of good pizza and drink a can of Arizona. That night my pain returned. I was extremely confused. It took me awhile before I discovered that most European companies don’t use high fructose corn syrup. I decided to try cutting it out of my beverage diet. Again the pain went away. I had the secret to a stomach pain free life. Around that time Vitamin Water was one of the few companies readily available in gas stations that didn’t use HFCS. I started drinking it constantly, to an extent that was probably unhealthy.
During this time Revive was one of my favorites. It’s supposed to be fruit punch, but it doesn’t exactly taste like it, maybe a little, but a very, very light version of it. I would narrow it down to more of a berry based fruit punch rather than a tropical one. If you haven’t tried this before I’d be shocked. Now you know a stupid story abut me that doesn’t affect your life at all. You also know very little about this drink. Here’s a bit more. It’s not overly sweet, but it’s fairly flavorful. You know what? You can find this anywhere so just spend the dollar and try it yourself.
- Website
- http://www.glaceau.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Crystalline Fructose
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement, Water
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper 1 week, 2 days ago
Glaceau Vitamin Water Focus
Sometimes life gets you down and you don’t know what to do to make things right. It is the job of your best friend to recognize these times and do the only thing that could possibly save the day: take you to the dirt mall to see a fortuneteller. There is nothing that the dirt mall fortuneteller cannot see about your future. She will guide you onto the righteous path. When you settle down in her stall she will tell you to relax and to focus. She will have a Eastern European accent, so don’t let your mind drift to dark places. Also, don’t let it drink to this wonderful drink. I understand that it is easy to focus on Focus, but that’s not why you’re there. You’re there to sort your life out. It is very fruity and refreshing though. It’s hard to not slip into a train of thought that is filled with strawberries and just the slightest hint of kiwi. A train of thought that is smooth and light, not too syrupy like many thought trains are. It’s like a dinning car fill with vitamins and minerals that are needed when you spend most of your meals in a food court. Sure it doesn’t really taste the way strawberries do, but more like the way strawberry scented things smell. It’s strange that it is still enjoyable, but it is.
Now what did she just say? Ahh yes that your birthday falls between the first and last of Oct-To-Ber.
- Website
- http://www.glaceau.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Crystalline Fructose and Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement, Water
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper 2 weeks ago
Sobe Lifewater Black and Blue Berry
A punch in the face: that's what I'm going to give you. You hit my brand new, 2001 Hyundai Accent and now I've got to get insurance involved...man. I just got out of the dealership. I know it's 2012, but it's new to me. Sure it's got 104,000 but that's just broken in. It's Korean and they make a quality product. So, to reiterate, I am going to make you black and blue.
No, you don't understand. I paid $800 for this car and sure it was a smoker's car and sure the transmission was a little wonky and sure it had a "Hatchet Man" vinyl graphic on the back hatch, but it was in great shape and the lady who sold it to me was so nice.
I'm sorry. Who did you say you were? You work for Sobe? Oh, your green tea is pretty sweet but a guilty pleasure of mine. Oh, that's right. You do make Lifewater. I've had some good ones of those. Black and Blue? No, I'm going to make you black and blue. Oh, you're going to give me a case of black and blue so that I don't punch your lights out. Alright, that's a fair trade. All this talking calmed me down anyway. Let's give it a go.
Well that's interesting. It's like blueberry when you sip it and when you swallow it tastes like a blackberry. That is real science there, Sobe man. There is a slight artificial sweetener taste, but it's just additional sweetness, not gross.
You know, this crash might have been the best thing that ever happened to me. Well, I do have a pretty great kid and wife, and I've accomplished a great deal. This was going to be a field car anyhow so I guess I didn't need it. Well, don't worry about anything. We'll let our insurance take care of it. Have a nice day, Sobe man. Next time, remember to stop at stop signs.
- Website
- http://www.sobe.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Erythritol
- Categories
- Water
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman 2 weeks, 4 days ago
Eldorado Vitamin Charged Natural Spring Water Pink Passion Guava
When Mike handed me this drink all I could think about was Duck Tales. Remember the mini series where they go in search of the Seven Cities of Gold? I’m pretty sure it was El Dorado that they were looking for. Man, I loved those episodes. They had the bad guy who was wheezy all the time. It was great. I feel like they used to rerun those episodes all the time. Also, remember that time they went to search for a lost relic, and it ended up actually being relish and Scrooge had just misheard it. Now that is the comedic gold of El Dorado.
This drink may not have that kind of gold in it, but it’s decent. It has a light non-citrus tropical flavor to it. I wouldn’t place it as either guava or passionfruit though. It’s almost flowery tasting, but not quite. I do enjoy it. I just would have given it a different name. It also contains no fruit juice, and has taurine in it for some reason. It doesn’t say anything about it being an energy drink, so that is a bit odd.
I wonder if Duck Tales is streaming on Netflix. Nope. They have the first three seasons available on DVD though. I may have to get those.
- Website
- http://eldoradosprings.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Organic Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Sports/Dietary Supplement, Water
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper 3 weeks ago
Sobe Lifewater Mango Mandarin With Coconut Water
Wow, this drink has one of the strongest scents I've ever experienced in a beverage. It smells like two people were making a fruit salad and they sliced into a mango and mandarin orange simultaneously. It's quite a smell to be smelled. I wish the taste were as strong and specific as the smell. There is little if any coconut water flavor in this. The only trace of it is in the aftertaste. The mango and mandarin flavors blend together into a new tropical citrus fruit. If I drank this blind I don't know if I would guess either of those fruits were in it, but knowing they are I can spot them. I like this a lot. If you're into Vitamin Water, but would like to mix things up a bit this would be the drink to do it with. It's evolution baby!
- Website
- http://www.sobe.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper 3 weeks, 1 day ago
Cascade Ice Pink Grapefruit
The zero calorie Cascade Ice drinks are basically just flavored seltzer water. The 2-calorie version on the other hand is lightly sweetened with sucralose. It’s not enough for it to taste overly diet. Actually, this is the least diet tasting diet drink I have ever tasted. It actually is made with pink grapefruit juice concentrate, which gives it an authentic grapefruit taste. The artificial sweetener makes sure that it’s not overly bitter like straight grapefruit juice would be. This also has an incredibly strong grapefruit scent to it. I enjoyed this way more than anyone would have expected.
- Website
- http://www.cascadeicewater.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sucralose
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper 3 weeks, 4 days ago
Eldorado Vitamin Charged Natural Spring Water Dragonfruit
You know there are dragons in that water. It's true. In Colorado there are dragons that only come out at night, like in the Smashing Pumpkins song, that swim around in the water. Didn't you ever wonder why there was a "No swimming past sunset" rule statewide? Yeah, that'd be because of the dragons. Thing is, they are messy characters. It's alright though because when they shed their scales, they fall in the water, degrade, and are made of like a sweet, fruity powder. They all flow downstream to the bottling plant where we make this "dragonfruit" drink. It's a really clean process. Sure, poop gets in the mix, but that's what filters are for. It's like a saltwater fish tank. We've got mediums that the poop and dragon hair and cans and garbage goes through so that we are left with the cleanest, purest flavored water.
What do you mean you don't believe me?! Come over here and look at this footage. Tell me that's not a dragon playing with a beach ball in the lake. You can't do it. It's mesmerizing, I know. I had never seen anything like it until I came here. They don't like people and do, even though it's a stereotype, breathe fire. They will breathe fire right on you and you will die. It's no joke and happens all the time. Our filters find people all the time. Parts. Legs and stuff. They think they're so smart with their scientific equipment coming in trying to get them for zoos and stuff. Dragons win all the time.
This drink is a rarity that can't come from anywhere but here, and it's great. There are other dragonfruit drinks but they aren't as authentic as this. This drink is light, sweet, fruity, and very quenching. Colorado's finest. Plus, we've chocked it full of vitamins, antioxidants, and more so that it's even better than regular juice or Vitamin Water. Now that you know that you shouldn't mess around in the water at night, enjoy your stay in Colorado.
- Website
- http://eldoradosprings.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Organic Cane Sugar
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman 3 weeks, 6 days ago
- Comments
- 3 Comments. Leave a comment.
True Citrus Orange
What's the matter boy? Ahh. Scurvy. Twas a terrible disease when we were at sea. There was all that water with no citrus to keep us from getting sick. We lost many men to that dreadful disease. I'll tell you, being a fisherman is not as glamorous as it sounds. Sure, you get to spend all day fishing, but have you ever eaten fish every day for sixty-two days? It gets old kid. Real old. Real fast. Especially when you run out of those McCormick spices. Paprika fish is great until it is no more. You end up marinating fish in other fish to try and get something different. Then you start mixing fish and potatoes or fish and old socks. I'm telling you. It gets bad.
So yes, vitamin C deficiency is no joke. Everyone's wives told them to bring these little packets of True Orange but they thought that they would be picked on for having flavor packets so they traded them for "tough guy" stuff like razors, cigarettes, and fingerless gloves. Me? I brought it and no one made fun of me. It was fine, too. It tastes like if you split a glass of orange juice between ten people and watered it down to make it work. It's lightly sweetened and still, somehow, 25% of your daily vitamin C intake.
I know you like the sea, lad, but please don't worry about what the other guys tell you. There is nothing cool about a dead guy wearing fingerless gloves because as cool as they were when he was alive, you certainly aren't going to take them off his cold, dead hands and call them your own. Well, unless you’re Zeke. That dude is crazy.
- Website
- http://www.truelemon.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Cane Sugar
- Categories
- Water
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 1/23/2012
Crystal Light Pure Tropical Blend
Remember that scene in Better Off Dead where Booger, or whatever his name is in that movie, you know who I'm talking about, is on the top of the mountain, probably the K2 when he says that the snow is like cocaine and snorts it? For some reason that's what I think of when I have powder drinks.
This is such a step in the right direction I don't know where to start. Flavors roll call! Orange. Blackberry. Passion fruit. Bam. Delicious cubed. Also, you can taste the Reb-A a little bit but it's mostly real sugar, good sugar, and awesome fruit flavors. Low calories. This is such a win in my book and like I said, a step in the right direction. A low calorie drink using natural sweeteners with delicious fruit flavors that doesn't suck and doesn't taste like it's diet and all that other stuff. Great.
- Website
- http://www.crystallight.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Sugar
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 1/18/2012
Mash A Low Calorie Water Drink Pomegranate Blueberry
Oh gee. I hope this doesn't taste like loganberry. I mean, don't get me wrong, I like loganberry. I kind of have to, I mean, I am from Western New York. So, to reiterate, I hope this doesn't taste like loganberry. Oh, fantastic, it tastes like loganberry. Oh great, it's carbonated and filled with artificial sweeteners. Awesome, a diet, carbonated loganberry. Plus, factor in the point that I don't know how much I just paid for this and this adds up to the start of a horror story of a drink. If you had to bottle and flavor a horror movie, it would be this drink. If you could have a flavored knife cut across your jugular, it would be a terribly dull knife that, when licked, would taste like this. If you were to be disemboweled by an inanimate object, a large bottle of this would have protruding arms and legs pulling at your entrails, all the while laughing menacingly and squirting it's liquid in your mouth.
- Website
- http://www.drinkmash.com/
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Crystalline Fructose
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 1/12/2012