Water (229 reviews)

Cabo Sparkling Water Pomelo/Grapefruit

Cabo Sparkling Water Pomelo/Grapefruit

Have the tides changed for taste buds? Have I just been told what to like and accepted it? I never used to like seltzer until a couple of years ago, then I tried the Polar vanilla and my life changed. It seemed around that time, or shortly after, that new brands started popping up and it started showing up more places. Was that all coincidence, or were darker forces at work? I mean I’m all for dark forces if they are working to make people consume healthier things. I would just like to know if my thoughts are my own. Let’s be honest here, seltzer is the new iteration of the pomegranate phase. It’s everywhere and no one really remembers asking for it, but we enjoy it. Whatever, It’s zero sugar and it has bubbles to scratch my throat. I’m on board.

I had never heard of the Cabo company until I came across a four-pack of these cans on sale for one dollar. That’s not a deal you pass up. The grapefruit flavoring is on the lighter side of a bunch of other companies I have tried similar products of, but there is a vague almost floral taste that lays underneath it. It’s makes it a more unique flavor, but keeps it refreshing. Everything about this carbonated bottle is fairly laid back, just like I imagine a vacation would be in the tourist haven of Mexico. Man, that sounds horrible. I simply do not do well with laid back and relaxing. I need to always be on the move. How about you go to Cabo and I’ll head to Mexico City and we can exchange stories afterwards. I’ll be the one covered in sticky mango juice from eating three times my body weights’ worth.

Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Sparkling, Water
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on March 3rd, 2018
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Hint Caffeine Kick Lemon Cayenne

Hint Caffeine Kick Lemon Cayenne

This is half wonderfully punishing and half reminiscent of my jobs as a dishwasher. That's where I place it. The lemon ,oh, dat lemon. I don't know where this lemon flavor is from but it does not taste like real lemon. If it's real, I guess I don't know what real lemon taste like. As for the cayenne, I am from Buffalo and my roots are in cayenne. This is a welcomed punch in the tongue. Ever since Jay and I got rightfully reamed out by the guys as Prometheus Springs, we have grown to love and appreciate a nice, spicy drink. This being a water drink, though, has its chuggability diminished by the fact your mouth would be increasingly on fire. Being from where I am, though, this is actually good. Take a little sip. Get a little burn. Take a big gulp. Get a big burn. Swish it around. There's that tingle you want. Am I a masochist? Nope. Do I like a good runny nose when I eat spicy food? Yes I do.

The lemon did take some getting used to but was it awful? No. It wasn't. It just took my taste buds for a loop. It might have been the spice that threw it off. I don't know. I have another one at home that I look forward to drinking. Maybe I'll give it to my kids when they're bothering me. Was that Hint's intention? I don't care. Hint didn't know that they were going to trash their room again and expect me to clean it up did they? Some people spank their kids. I might just choose to give them secretly spicy drinks when they're not listening to their G.D. dad after he asked them to feed the dog four G.D. times.

Oh, and I don't know why there is caffeine in there. Do people need caffeine in their water?

Website
http://www.drinkhint.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Water
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on February 28th, 2018
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La Croix Sparkling Water Tangerine

La Croix Sparkling Water Tangerine

What I have been drinking is possibly the least flavorful La Croix flavor. It stands tall with most other seltzer companies, but it doesn't have the strong flavor punch one comes to expect from this company. I had anticipated more from tangerine as it's a naturally strong flavor, but it just kind of hangs there like a sitcom will they won’t they relationship.

Website
http://www.lacroixwater.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Sparkling, Water
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on November 25th, 2017
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Sapp Birch Water Rosehip

Sapp Birch Water Rosehip

Sap. I am drinking sap. It’s not even sap from a maple tree. It’s birch sap. I’m guessing drinking sap is something the majority of people in the United States would never imagine themselves doing, but it’s a thing and it is apparently very popular in Scandinavia. When I was there I didn’t see anyone drinking sap, but then again I wasn’t looking for it. Here I am though sipping away at sap and it’s not all that bad. It is very different tasting than maple, because you know different trees different tastes. It is somehow not syrupy, nor is it very sweet. Actually it pretty much has the consistency of water, which was unexpected. It is very refreshing and hydrating. I don’t really know how to describe the flavor. I believe it is its own thing that has no real comparison. I can taste a light rosehips in here though. This is nothing what I expected, but it is a good thing. Give it a try and attempt to describe the flavor yourself.

Website
http://www.sapplife.co/
Country
Ukraine
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Other/Weird, Water
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on November 21st, 2017
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Polar Seltzer'ade Tart Cherry Limeade

Polar Seltzer'ade Tart Cherry Limeade

What we have here could only be described as a tasty seltzer water. What we also have here might be the weakest of the Seltzer’ade line. If this had been released as a normal Polar flavor I would have thought it was quite pleasant. It has a cherry flavor that doesn’t remind me of medicine or black cherries, and that is always a plus. It also has a light subtle lime flavor to it, which makes a great base for any seltzer. The only problem is that by throwing that Seltzer’ade branding on it, my expectations are instantly raised. The rest of the flavors are incredibly strong and bold, this lacks in both of those. That by no means makes this a bad product, but it’s just not worthy of the title (and additional price). If Polar were to put this exact same product in their normal bottles I would be more prone to purchase it again.

Website
http://www.polarbev.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Sparkling, Water
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on November 15th, 2017
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Polar Seltzer Ginger Lime Mule

Polar Seltzer Ginger Lime Mule

Look at being preemptive and getting their winter flavors out before the snow has even begun to fall. Hell, I’m still reviewing summer flavors and they are two seasons ahead.

When I heard this was an upcoming flavor I was beyond excited. Lime is the basis for most of the seltzer I drink and ginger is my weakness. I would probably purchase any beverage that had ginger in the flavor name. This, unfortunately, leaves something to be desired. The lime is right where I want it to be, but the ginger simply isn’t strong enough and tastes more like ginger flavoring than the actual root. Ginger is a flavor that is meant to be bold and in your face (as well as burning your throat). This is just not that. It’s still good, and I would buy it from time to time, but it is by no means a new favorite. I suppose it’s good that it’s seasonal. Maybe I will grow to miss it by next winter’s release.

Website
http://www.polarbev.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Ginger, Sparkling, Water
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on October 30th, 2017
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Polar Seltzer'ade Mango Limeade

Polar Seltzer'ade Mango Limeade

This may in fact be the best seltzer ever created. All other seltzers were given inferiority complexes when this was released. They all lay awake at night, looking at a 4am ceiling wondering where they went wrong in their lives. The poor things never stood a chance.

The mango smell that permeates from this is so strong that in a blind sniff test there is no way I would have guessed it was a seltzer. The flavor rivals that scent and is so strong and pleasant. The lime sits perfectly under the mango for a tropical treat. My senses are treated so well by this beverage that my mind is tricked into thinking I was drinking something that is laden with sugar. In reality there is not a speck of it.

Website
http://www.polarbev.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Sparkling, Water
Rating
5/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on October 24th, 2017
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Sapp Birch Water Original

Sapp Birch Water Original

Birch beer is fantastic. Let's get this. Well this doesn't taste like birch beer. It doesn't smell like it. It doesn't taste like it. This is probably (zero research, friends) the birch equivalent of maple water but doesn't tastes like you strained it through some tasty flapjacks.

Brass tacks. This is water, bruh. It's water with a hint of something you will never know what it is. I promise. It tastes like nothing. It smells like nothing. I could have been had with this drink as far as I know. Is it bad? Well that depends. Are you one of those idiots that thinks water is gross? If so, come on, dude. Grow up. Juice is terrible for you. Learn a book you dummy. Juice is just a cheating way to get kids to drink more water. You're 32. Drink water and eat your vegetables.

Website
http://www.sapplife.co/
Country
Ukraine
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Water
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on October 19th, 2017
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Polar Seltzer'ade Raspberry Pink Lemonade

Polar Seltzer'ade Raspberry Pink Lemonade

Come on Polar, you obviously have the means, so why not make all of your seltzers this flavorful? Why save it for a specialized line? Has there been a new breakthrough in the sugarless flavoring world that has allowed you to up the taste? Going back to your classic flavors after drinking the Seltzer’ade line just leaves me wanting now. I mean I am still drinking a ton of the stuff, but the magic is gone. I have been shown that the world is more than I thought it was and I want it all. This is bursting with flavor, well at least as much as seltzer can be. Or, can there be more? I never would have expected it could have been before, but I was proven wrong).Give me more Polar. Give me it all.

Website
http://www.polarbev.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Sparkling, Water
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on October 19th, 2017
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Polar Seltzer'ade Watermelon Lemonade

Polar Seltzer'ade Watermelon Lemonade

Dear Readers,
I am a slacker and I am waaaaayyyy behind the times. This summer Polar released their Seltzer’ade line and here I sit in autumn’s grasp and I have only reviewed one of them. To be fair, the blueberry lemonade was the only one of the five flavors that I actually saw in the stores around Buffalo during the actual summer. Now that a Whole Foods finally opened here a couple of weeks ago I was able to pick up some cases of three of the remaining flavors (the tart cherry is still elusive). Summer may be behind us, but I certainly hope Polar leaves these available all year around. As much as I hate to admit it, they are superior to the classic Polar flavors that I live off of. The flavors are way more pronounced, to an extent that several times I have found myself checking to make sure there isn’t any sugar involved (there isn’t).

I would best describe the watermelon lemonade as someone dissolved a handful of Jolly Ranchers in a glass of carbonated water, and then somehow removed all the sugar. It doesn’t taste particularly like an actual watermelon, but it is uncannily similar to the pre mentioned candy without the sweetness. That blows my mind because that candy is probably 99% sugar, yet this tastes exactly like it.

This particular flavor isn’t something I would drink all of the time, but I wish I would have had it during the summer. I also think this line is the key to weening children off soda. Slowly replace their soda with cans of this and they will be off the sugar in no time, to the dismay of the Dental Association of America.

Website
http://www.polarbev.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Sparkling, Water
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on October 11th, 2017
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