Energy Drink (510 reviews)

#Yolo Energy Mixer | Drink Blue Spirit

#Yolo Energy Mixer | Drink Blue Spirit

You only live once, but as it turns out life can be pretty horrible sometimes, especially if you are drinking a beverage such as this. You may be in luck though, because this tastes like it may or not be poison. If I saw a warning on it that said “If ingested call Poison Control.” To me it tastes like carbonated blue Hugs that a neighborhood creep drugged to off the kids on the block. Perhaps there was a mix up and in fact I am consuming windshield wiper fluid? Do you want to know how hard it was to get through this? My friend says it tastes how freshly cleaned toilets smell. Enjoy!

Country
Mexico
Sweetener
Azucar
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper 2 weeks, 6 days ago
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Rockstar Revolt Killer Citrus

Rockstar Revolt Killer Citrus

As you may know from reading thirsty Dudes (You don’t, because you don’t. I mean, why would you?) I have a sensitivity to caffeine and energy drinks can really screw with me. I don’t drink them very often because of this. The thing is that I actually kind of like the weird energy drink taste that exists nowhere else in the beverage world. On top of that there are situations where I have to be up until nearly dawn and the chances of me staying awake that late on my own are slim. Friday was one of those nights. I knew I needed some help and figured I might as well cross another drink off the Thirsty Dudes list, so I stood way longer than any human should in front of the beverage cooler checking each of the energy drinks to our master list to see what we hadn’t reviewed yet. Shockingly there were very few that we hadn’t written about. I’m a fan of citrus, and the green of the can made me think it would be heavier on the lime side of things, so I chose this can of Rockstar Revolt.

This most definitely did not taste like I had anticipated. I had expected a lime version of a classic energy drink. That weird part bubblegum part citrus taste mixed with a whole lot of lime. Instead, this tastes like 7 Up or Sprite with a little something extra in it. That something is kind of like this was made from a powder and it wasn’t missed up enough. There isn’t an actual gritty texture to this, but it tastes like there should be. I don’t understand where that is coming from. There is no trace of the “energy drink taste” that I mentioned earlier, this is its one thing. There is also no real taste of the orange juice that is listed in the ingredietns.

I personally think that lemon lime is the most boring of soda flavors, but I know there are people out there who love it, or it wouldn’t be such a staple. This is going to make some people very happy.

Website
http://www.rockstar69.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on February 5th, 2017
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Amp Energy Zero Blueberry White Grape

Amp Energy Zero Blueberry White Grape

Do you ever find yourself wondering why cleaners always seem to be lemon scented? Do you find yourself wishing that you lived in a world where you could clean your counters, floors and woodwork with something that smelled like blueberries? Does your mind then drift and you find yourself contemplating what that delicious smelling cleaning product would taste like? Well lucky for you Amp has the answer for you and it’s fairly gross.

First off, blueberries are great. Who hasn’t sat down and accidently ate an entire basket in one sitting? Secondly, I also love grapes, especially white grapes. When they are nice and plump at a perfectly ripe phase they are fantastic. This beverage somehow messed up mixing two wonderful tastes together and I blame the sweetener. This doesn’t have the typical sucralose flavor to it, but it does something to the other flavors that just ruins them. It starts off with a decent blueberry taste but then it turn to the white grape. The two don’t mingle. They simply do no mix together. The thing is at the exact moment of the switch the sucralose does something and it tastes like a cleaner and everything is ruined. This is so close to being good. It makes the jump from roof top to roof top, but just misses and plummets to its death.

Website
http://www.ampenergy.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on December 18th, 2016
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Runa Clean Energy Blood Orange

Runa Clean Energy Blood Orange

Ladies and Gentlemen, I think I am finally getting old. I get creaks. I get aches. I fall asleep on the couch while watching movies at night. All of the telltale signs are there. On top of all that I have mentioned it seems to happen with increasing regularity that I need some sort of boost to get me moving in the morning at work. I always assumed that when people talked about needing their morning coffee it was due to their bodies getting used to ingesting caffeine. Now I am realizing that sometimes you just need the push, even if your body is not used to it. I try to not make it a regular thing, but at least once a week I find myself drinking something caffeinated in the morning (usually tea). This is a great alternative though. It’s a mixture of guayusa tea and fruit juice that tastes amazing even without added sugar.

In this beverage the fruit juice sits pretty evenly with the tea flavor and that is exactly where I want it to be. It’s not sweet, but it’s also not bitter. Everything about this falls right in the middle. All of the energy in it comes from the caffeine derived from the guayusa leaf, so it doesn’t leave you feeling insane. It’s just a gentle push to help you get through the morning. It’s just a bonus that it won’t leave you with gross coffee breath or unwanted calories from sugar. It’s simple, it’s delicious and it’s just what I want in the morning.

Website
http://www.runa.org/
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Energy Drink, Iced Tea
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on December 5th, 2016
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Monster Energy Unleaded

Monster Energy Unleaded

This is…odd. I don’t mean that it tastes strange, it’s actually very pleasant. The unusual thing about this energy drink is that they went out of their way to make it caffeine free (get it? Unleaded). The little blurb on the can says that it’s so people who enjoy the taste of Monster, but who are also sensitive to caffeine can still enjoy it. My question is caffeine really the ingredient that people get all jittery over? I mean I do have a sensitivity (read: I’m not addicted so it serves its intended purpose and doesn’t just make me “normal.”) but I feel like it’s more the taurine that gets me all crazy. Natural energy drinks don’t affect me the same way as Monster and it’s brethren do. This is still loaded with B vitamins, niacin, taurine, ginseng and the like, so it still gave me a boost. It seems odd to me and not something there would be a big market for. If it serves its purpose to allow people to get where they need to go, good for it.
Overall it tastes like a slightly diet regular Monster; all sweet like chemical candy. Can we take a moment to acknowledge that energy drinks are the only beverage that diet versions don’t taste absolutely disgusting? This is sweetened with sugar as well as sucralose and it doesn’t taste like poison at all. The other flavors just mask the diet death taste in all the right ways.

Website
http://www.monsterenergy.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on November 12th, 2016
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Komodo Carbonated Energy Beverage Made with Coconut Water

Komodo Carbonated Energy Beverage Made with Coconut Water

Alternative energy drinks keep popping up more and more. I say alternative because they don’t have the same ingredients or taste like Red Bull and its artificial ingredient filled running crew. Sure a lot of these products don’t pack the same punch, but do you really need those crazy jitters? I didn’t think so.

Komodo takes things a way I have never come across before. They carbonate coconut water and add some caffeine and B vitamins to supply the imbiber with energy. They only use natural ingredients and you can tell by the way it tastes. It’s strong on the coconut taste, but I suppose that is what you want when you purchase a coconut energy drink. The flavor does fall a bit on the toasted side rather than the plain old coconut water side of things, but that may be due to the use of stevia as well as cane sugar to keep the calories down. This is something new and interesting and it’s decent enough to go back for return purchases.

Website
http://komodopower.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Sugar
Categories
Coconut, Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on November 11th, 2016
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Joker Mad Energy Tropical Mango

Joker Mad Energy Tropical Mango

It’s common knowledge at this point (at least amongst us that read comics) that Bill Finger got screwed on getting credit for his work in the DC universe. The man helped create some of the most well-known comic characters of all time, but Bob Kane got the bi-lines. In recent years he has finally started to get the credit he deserves. I can only hope that if his estate is not responsible for these energy drinks that they give some sort of credit, because there is absolutely no way the image on this can is not based on his character The Joker. I’m not a litigious man, but if credit is not being given, perhaps a trip to the courthouse is in order.

As for the taste of this beverage, I can only assume its creation went something like this: Harleen comes over to her boyfriend Joe’s apartment after picking up some mangos from the grocery store and plans on making them some smoothies with the orange juice that she saw in his fridge. Upon arriving to the apartment she discovers that the orange juice has actually been sitting in there for several years and the inside of the carton looks like some sort of hate crime. The pipes in the apartment are so gross and rusted that the water comes out tinted brown, and there is no way she is going to consume that. She really wants that smoothie though and the only other liquid Joe has in the house is some generic Red Bull type energy drink. With a shrug and a sigh she pulls out the blender and mixes away. The result is this drink. It has a general energy drink taste underneath a very strong mango flavor that tastes authentic, even though I’m sure there’s no way in Gotham that it is.

Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on November 2nd, 2016
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Feel Natural Energy Mango Passionfruit

Feel Natural Energy Mango Passionfruit

This is centimeters from being horrible. It walks the tightrope of having a diet death taste, but somehow maintains its balance and the crowd of taste buds cheers on the dismount. It is sweetened by both stevia and cane sugar, which reels in the horrible diet flavor. It really does take you right to the limit of what you can handle before it becomes just another diet drink. Instead it has a decent fruit flavor and keeps it at 15 calories. It’s not ideal flavorwise, but it is better than most beverages that contain a zero calorie sweetener.

It’s been a long day and it has potential to be a long night as well. I needed a little boost to push me through, but I didn’t want your everyday energy drink that would make me feel all crazy and not be able to sleep. This seems to be doing a good job of working both sides. I’m more alert, but I don’t feel like the only sleep that I’m going to get will be after the sun rises. Here’s to hoping it continues to keep the yawns away.

Website
http://www.feelenergy.com/
Country
United States
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on September 24th, 2016
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Bang Star Blast

Bang Star Blast

Redline makes some of the most intense energy drinks I have ever some across. If I drink one it’s absolutely guaranteed that I will not come anywhere near sleep for at least 12 hours. It’s a blessing and a curse, just like logic. The reason I mention this is that the same creators have concocted this energy drink as well. While it may not have the same intensity it still gives you the shot to the heart that you so desperately want from energy drinks, but that so few deliver.

Bang does not use sugar in their beverages, as the spike in blood sugar that they cause is also one of the things responsible for the energy drink crash that some people experience. Nobody wants to go up, just to fall even further down later. Instead it’s sweetened with sucralose; I know, not very game changing. The thing that does make Bang stand out amongst the armies of energy drinks that fill coolers in gas stations all across the planet is their energy blend. They use a mixture of Creatine, CoQ10 and branch chain amino acids as well as the usual caffeine and B vitamins. I’m not totally sure what the difference is chemically, but I can tell you I most definitely got a pick up on my drive home from MI yesterday. Of course it was just in time for traffic to come to a standstill, so I was chock full on energy in an essentially parked car on the highway. How wonderful. It just hit me that since Creatine is included these are probably intended for use when you’re working out, you know…not sitting in a car.

This flavor is Star Blast and that may mean that it’s supposed to be star fruit flavored, or it may just be a catchy name. Either way it tastes like a slightly diet version of some random Hubba Bubba or Bubblicious gums from the 80s/early 90s. It’s very sweet in the fake sugar way, but it’s not gross. It really tastes like kind of fruity gum to me, and that’s fairly pleasant.

I have no qualms with Bang. In fact I quite enjoyed this. I do have a problem with the way people were driving in Canada yesterday though. There were no accidents. There was no construction. Why were you stopping and starting so much then?

Website
http://https://www.vpxsports.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on August 8th, 2016
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Red Bull The Summer Edition Kiwi Twist

Red Bull The Summer Edition Kiwi Twist

This was…weird. No matter how many times I reminded myself that this was kiwi flavored, every time I took a sip my brain/taste buds colluded and made me expect lime. This is not lime. It was never supposed to be lime. Red Bull does not want me to think lime. The problem is the green can makes me think lime, and that is my problem, not theirs. I mean it’s not a huge problem, but it is weird when you expect tangy citrus and you are greeted with a sweet fruit flavor.
To be fair this is probably the most accurate kiwi flavored drink that I have ever tasted. They really nail that quick aftertaste that kiwi gives you. I could actually believe that this was just a kiwi soda and not an energy drink, because the chemical taste is not very strong. I kind of want it there. How strange is that? I complain about that flavor so much, yet when it comes to a Red Bull product, I want it there. Something is clearly wrong with me.

Website
http://www.redbull.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucrose
Categories
Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on August 2nd, 2016
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