Arizona Oak Brewed Tea Lemon

Arizona  Oak Brewed Tea Lemon

Look at us, Arizona. We are growing up and we are doing it together. When I was a kid, you and I shared lemon tea and green tea outside of gas stations. Now I've got a career, kid, dog, mortgage and I'm drinking oak barrel steeped tea. We are classy individuals. We went from a time of immaturity including but not limited to:

  • lighting tennis balls on fire and playing street hockey
  • Throwing cans of Raid into bonfires and having them explode.
  • Making multi-floor treehouses in a friend's backyard
  • Following friends down hills in cars while they rode street luges made out of old street signs


Together, we have turned into quasi-functional "adults" with responsibilities. Your responsibility was to make a calm, nice tasting tea and you did it, buddy. This tea is slightly lemony, slightly sweetened and has all the nice, woody qualities that would make a whisky drinker blush. Way to go. Now let's go be creepy dudes at the mall.

Website
http://drinkarizona.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Maple Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman 5 hours, 2 minutes ago
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Oak Brewed Tea, Lemon Oak Black Tea 20 Oz (12 Pack)

Eternal Energy 10 Hour Time Release Berry

Eternal Energy 10 Hour Time Release Berry

I’m just going to go ahead and say what I can only assume everyone is thinking; 10 hours is one heck of a long time. That’s longer than a typical work day. It’s so long that you have to plan out when you are going to drink this shot, or else you can say goodbye to you regularly scheduled sleep. Personally, if I drink any sort of energy drink past 5 or 6pm I’m not falling asleep until somewhere in the range of 3-5 in the morning. I’m an extreme case because I apparently have sensitivity to uppers. Seriously though, if you’re driving late at night and you just need a push to make it through, this is probably not the product for you. The only uses I can think for this would be if you wanted to stay up all night having adventures, or if you were looking for a push to help you through the work day. Okay, I’m an idiot and didn’t reads the blub on the bottle until now, and this was in fact developed to help people get through a full work day. This whole thing makes sense now. People now have the ability to down one shot instead of drinking more than a handful of overly sugared energy drinks to push them through the work they hate.

This certainly has the same concentrated chemical taste that all energy shots seem to have. No one said the basis of energy tasted good. Eternal Energy did do a good job covering it up with a berry flavor and a whole mess of fake sugar, actually the fake sugar may have made it worse, but so long empty calories. As far as I can remember I’ve never enjoyed the taste of an energy shot, but at lease this one is somewhat palatable. Oh yeah, I also literally climbed a mountain after I drank this, and even though my body was aching an extreme amount I was still focused and the energy this shot gave me kept me moving, so I’ll say it works just fine.

Website
http://www.eternalenergyshot.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Energy Drink, Shot
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper 5 hours, 15 minutes ago
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Eternal Energy 10 Hour Timed Release Energy Shot...See discounts below for 3-5 and 8 Bottle POWER Packs.

Zobo Hibiscus Drink Ginger

Zobo Hibiscus Drink Ginger

I will say this for the hundredth time. Deep breath. Here we go:

If you are going to flavor your drink, just commit to it.

Don't say that it tastes like ginger if it's not going to taste like ginger or burn like ginger. It's just kind of annoying. This drink tasted like hibiscus which was good but only tasted very, very slightly like ginger. No burn. So sad. I saved this one for last because it should have been a treat and a half.

It's not a total loss. Like I said, it's a fine hibiscus drink but if I told anyone else that this was ginger hibiscus they would call me a liar. I can't have that on my conscience.

Website
http://hemispherebeverages.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Cane Sugar
Categories
Mix/Concentrate
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman 1 day, 9 hours ago
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Purity Organic Superjuice Lemon Agave Ginger

Purity Organic Superjuice Lemon Agave Ginger

Two kids in the office didn't ask for the punishment I gave them but oh did they enjoy it. One dude was sitting there and the other just walked in with a drink in his hands. Guess what? I don't give a rip. Everyone will enjoy this and there is nothing you can do about it. You know why? Because I'm older, that's why. I'm their mean older brother who bought them beer but instead of beer it was a spicy lemonade type drink.

We've all got glasses of our drinks and we take our first sips. Ahhhh, we all say. Ahhhh. That there was a sipping drink, one to mull over whilst looking across the water as the sun sets on yet another beautiful day at the cabin. Fish are jumping out of the water. Birds are chirping all around. Bears aren't murdering you but instead sitting beside you on the dock with their bear feat danglin' in the water.

What's so G.D. great about it? It's like lemonade with bits and grits in it. Accompanying that would be a strong, strong ginger taste that is something to call your mama about. Everything is alright. The burn. The lemon.

Website
http://www.purityorganic.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Agave
Categories
Juice
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman 2 days, 5 hours ago
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Purity Super Juice, Lemon, Agave and Ginger 14 Oz (12 Pack)

Zuberfizz Key Lime Cream Soda

Zuberfizz Key Lime Cream Soda

When you promise cream soda, you better deliver on some cream soda. Like root beer it is a special flavor, that when you want it, you’re body seems to think it needs it to survive. You will feel weird and jittery until your need is satiated. Sadly this bottle of Zuberfizz will leave you with the shakes, as it doesn’t taste like cream soda at all. It’s a strange thing because the other two cream sodas we’ve had from this company were quite nice, but the base of this just tastes like generic sweetened soda water.

Do you want to talk about Key Lime? Well this soda has you covered there. It tastes like real key lime, without being overly, intensely sweet. If this were labeled a key lime soda with no mention of cream soda I would think that it was great, but man were my expectations not met. Like Sprecher, it also has that strange flavor that accompanies soda that has been fire brewed in a kettle. It’s not unpleasant, but it something that takes a little acclimation.

Zuberfizz, you nailed it with the key lime, but you failed on the cream soda part of the exam. I think that means you have to go to summer school. Give Mark Harmon my love.

Website
http://www.zuberfizz.com
Country
Pakistan
Sweetener
Pure Cane Sugar
Categories
Soda Pop
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper 3 days, 12 hours ago
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Zuberfizz Key Lime (6 bottles)

Arizona Oak Brewed Tea Lightly Sweet

Arizona  Oak Brewed Tea Lightly Sweet

The folks at Arizona are preparing for the worst. No, they are not in financial straights (at least as far as I know), they are simply doing what every smart company does, and that is prepare for the worst and come up with an exit strategy. Some companies figure out how they could sell all of their assets, and what they could get for everything if the worst finally hit. Others, more likely in less legal pursuits, bury bags of money random places so that they have something to fall back on in case they need to go fast. Arizona has forgone all of the traditional routes and has purchased a surplus of oaken barrels. They have chosen to ride the iced tea wave until the end, and if that leaves them homeless and penniless, at least they won’t be naked and will show their sense of humor, by going the classic editorial cartoon route of wearing nothing but a barrel with shoulder straps.

While these barrels were originally bought as a joke, some quick thinker on the R&D team realized that until the day came when their last tea leaf was brewed and all of their clothing was sold off to the Richie Richs of the world, these barrels could serve another purpose; they could be used to brew a special blend of tea. You see if you brew the tea in the barrels some of the oak’s flavor is absorbed into the tea giving it a more refined taste. The same method is often used in making wine, except with the tea it doesn’t taste like death and rot, it tastes sophisticated. Add a little honey and maple syrup to that brew and you’re good to go. Make sure you don’t add too much though. Those are strong flavors that could easily distract one’s taste buds from the oak notes. Luckily Arizona got it right on the nose. You can taste the tea, the oak, the honey and the maple and none of the flavors are fighting for dominance. This lightly sweetened version of this tea has a little sugar added as well (8g per serving, 20g per bottle). There’s more sugar in here than I would expect in something that is lightly sweet, but to me it does have the perfect amount of sweetness for when I’m not looking for a straight tea, no sugar.

Unfortunately for the future of Arizona, some rookie, smashed up the barrels and brewed the chunks in the tea. Sure it has the same results on the flavor, but what about when the market falls out? What will the employees wear?

Website
http://drinkarizona.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper 4 days, 10 hours ago
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Oak Brewed Tea, Lightly Sweetened Oak Black Tea 20 Oz (12 Pack)

True Brew Shake-Ums! Greens & Grapes

True Brew Shake-Ums! Greens & Grapes

Kids hate vegetables and with good cause. Sometimes they smell. Brussels sprouts? Please. They stank. Fruit almost always looks good. Only weird kids like V8. I was a weird kid if that's the case but kids would much rather drink something like an apple juice or a fruit punch than a V8. Sorry, V8. You're almost the enemy. If they had drinks like this when I was a kid, I don't know. I don't know if I'd be mad because I would feel like someone was poisoning me with vegetables against my will or if I would say, "Oh, you know what? I have been dumb. Turns out vegetables are not the devil."

This is not the devil, contains fruit, and contains vegetables. It's naturally sweetened and doesn't taste like half of its ingredients. The ignorant kid in me enjoy it because I can't taste the vegetables but hey, if I could taste some celery, that might not have been so bad. It tastes like a pretty strong grape juice and that's it. Surprise kid, you’ve been had and you just ate vegetables. You are as dumb as you look.

Website
http://www.truebrew.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Juice
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman 6 days, 7 hours ago
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Hair King Pomegranate

Hair King Pomegranate

This just may be the oddest drink we’ve ever reviewed, at least the oddest “functional” beverage. This is a 3.38oz bottle of a beverage whose sole purpose is to promote hair health care. According to their website this beverage is supposed to help with the reduction of greying and thinning hair. They tell of the science behind this through the use of broken English on their page. I personally do not suffer from thinning hair nor am I going grey, so I can’t attest to whether it works or not, but who am I to argue with science.

What I can report is on taste and I am happy to tell you that it is not nearly as bad as I had anticipated. Like with most shot beverages I expected it to taste like runoff from a nuclear plant, luckily it just tastes like some weird cranberry juice. It definitely has a cranberry base, but it’s not overly tart and there is something else that that I can’t pin down. It reminds me of something I had in my childhood, but I can’t remember what, which is vaguely infuriating. It could just be the sucralose making it weird, but not completely diet tasting. I want to say it tastes like something I won at a pizza place/arcade like Major Magics or Chuck E Cheese, because those sorts of places keep popping in my mind. Perhaps Charles Cheese used to down these things. He always did have a nice coat of fur on him.

As a side note there is a weird notation on the bottle that says, “Hair King Drink does not prevent intoxication.” I would really like to know the circumstances that led them to including that little message.

Website
http://hairkingdrink.com/
Country
Korea
Sweetener
Corn Syrup
Categories
Other/Weird, Shot, Sports/Dietary Supplement
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper 6 days, 9 hours ago
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Sweet 'tauk Lemonade Blackberry Ginger

Sweet 'tauk Lemonade Blackberry Ginger

Sometimes your preconceived notions on how something should be are not always the best. In the world I have embraced lemonade is a beverage that is overly sweet and at the same time also tart. It’s the child in me that craves this as a refreshing summer beverage. The thing is who decided that is what lemonade should be? We’ve been conditioned to expect that, the same with the sweetness of soda. If from a young age we were given versions of these beverage with little to no sugar, that is what we would see as the norm, and I’m sure it’s what we would crave.

This bottle of Sweet’tauk is how I wish lemonade was introduced to me. If you take out the added blackberry and ginger flavors, all that is in this bottle is water, lemon juice and evaporated cane juice. The results are very different than what you are used to. There is more of a tartness to it, but it’s not even close to an extent that would make it hard to drink. It tastes like lemonade with less sugar, because that it what it is. I’d be lying if I said my body didn’t wish there was more sugar in here, but my brain, who runs the show, knows that I don’t need all that excess sweetener and it’s happy for the lack of it. I want to have grown up on this. I want this to be what my body expects when it wants lemonade. I certainly have a sweet tooth that I’m working on kicking, and this would fit right into my ideal sugar-intake world.

A downfall of their being less sugar is that the berry flavor is not as exaggerated. Again this is something I could get used to, and there is enough berry in there for me not to question its naming. I do wish the ginger was more present in burn as it is in flavor, but you can’t always get what you want. I understand that the majority of people out there don’t want their beverages to hurt them when they drink them, so I can accept it for what it is and what is it is what our past should have been.

Website
http://www.sweettauk.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Organic Evaporated Cane Juice
Categories
Ginger, Lemonade
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper 1 week ago
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Dang Root Beer

Dang Root Beer

Sometimes I hate myself. I currently hold ill will against me because all I can think of while drinking this root beer is a non-existent radio edit of the Sophie B Hawkins song Damn Dang I Wish I Was Your Lover. Actually I don’t even know if I hate that song. I don’t think I have any opinion about it either way, it simply exists. That is not a feeling I want to have when I drink a root beer and luckily Dang! root beer does not leave me apathetic. It’s on the smoother side of most brews and that is something I like from time to time. Luckily, this happens to be one of those times. I’m really enjoying this it’s a traditional style brew. Sometimes you’re looking for something more than that, something new and exciting, but then you drink a soda like this and you remember why it is the go to for most root beer, it’s just great. I don’t mean to say that this is a clone of everyday root beer. It’s in the same ballpark as that, but it’s playing for the majors, not that done AA team.

Now, decide for yourself.

Website
http://dangthatsgood.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Root Beer, Soda Pop
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper 1 week, 1 day ago
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Dang That's Good Root Beer (12 bottles)
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