Sucralose (292 reviews)

Rockstar Xdurance Energy Ripped Red

Rockstar Xdurance Energy Ripped Red

I am not the raging human I once was. There was a time in my life where I would leave for a trip to Toronto at 9PM, get there, hang out for hours, get back in my car and drive the 1:30/2:00 home and arrive in my driveway around 5am. I was perfectly fine doing that. In fact it seemed like a completely reasonable thing to do, and I did it without the help of caffeine or any other upper. It would just be Mike, myself and what we would consider to be good music playing way too loud. These days, leaving at 6 on a December evening feels like I should just be crawling into bed and it is a complete chore. I knew there was no way I would make it back alive without some help, so on the way to the border I stopped at a gas station and picked this up. As proven by me writing this, it works. It more than works. There were no yawns. No heavy eyes. No problems whatsoever. Just complete alertness (to a detrimental effect as I couldn’t fall asleep once I made it home 6 hours after drinking this.

While there is no problem with the functionality of this beverage, the taste leaves something to be desired. I know it’s my fault, expecting something sweetened with sucralose to taste anything but chemical, but I keep hoping a company will crack the code that will hide that gross flavor. Ripped Red is a fruit punch of sorts that seems to be a mixture of cherry, strawberry, and cranberry; a strange, but interesting mix. I think I actually want more strawberry cranberry hybrid drinks. It’s sweet and tastes like a Wonka candy that I wished existed. It’s just too bad that it’s all hidden under a fog of diet. Still I keep buying the low calorie energy drinks when I need them to ensure I don’t pack on the pounds as I get older. No one wants a chunky Jay.

Website
http://www.rockstar69.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on December 12th, 2018
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Bang Purple Guava Pear

Bang Purple Guava Pear

As soon as this washed over my taste buds I thought to myself, “This is the best tasting energy drink of all time.” Less than a second later the sucralose hit me and all of that was out the window. Yes, I know that high sugar energy drinks cause you to have the dreaded crash, where you just want to slump around. It’s just unfortunate that they taste so much better (well up to an extent that they become way too sweet). There is a balance that needs to be formed and I can say for certain that sucralose is not the answer. This beverage could be the poster child for that movement. It could be perfect, but after a few sips you taste more sucralose than anything else, and what is the point of that? In a perfect world that wonderfully fruity guava flavor that greeted me would be accompanied by the slightest amount of cane sugar that would amplify it and not distract from it as the current sweetener is doing. There is a little pear flavor in here, but it is also lost in the mix. This has the potential to be wonderful, but it falls short. Bang wants us to be(somewhat) healthier, and I applaud them for that, but there just has to be another way to do it.

Website
http://www.vpxsports.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on December 10th, 2018
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Red Bull Sugar Free The Lime Edition

Red Bull Sugar Free The Lime Edition

So picture this, I’m at the gym, attempting to improve my mental health and lost some of the vanilla pudding that has formed on my human frame as I have aged nearly into my fourth decade on this planet. I had just finished running a few miles on the treadmill and then began to use the weight lifting machines, when I notice that there are a pair of women walking around the gym with cooler backpacks handing out cans of Red Bull to people as they work out. First off, that is jut weird and kind of not acceptable. To me the gym is a place that you do not interact with people unless you are asking them if they are finished with a machine, or you are calling them out for being a creep and checking out other human people in their sweaty state. Secondly, you can bet your ass that as soon as I was done with a set of reps I approached them before they could approach me and I got a can from them. The interaction was inevitable, so I was proactive about it to get it over and of course I was going to take a free sample.

We have really slacked on Red Bull reviews because I had heard some unsavory things about the people who run the company, which ended up being not accurate upon doing some research. I was glad to give the newer flavors a try, especially when it was free. This though, was not what I wanted. I actually prefer the sugar free Red Bull to the original variety, and I was hoping this would go the same route. Unfortunately that was not the case. This is supposed to be limeade, but it was not like they added lime to a normal diet Red Bull. Instead it’s a new beast that just tastes like a tiny bit of lime mixed in with a whole lot of sucralose grossness. Here are my parting words for the company; Just add flavoring to your original base products for these “new” flavors, and teach your representatives what appropriate venues to hand out samples are. The way things are going I can only assume after the gym they were heading to a funeral to pass out samples.

Website
http://www.redbull.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on October 10th, 2018
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Monster Mutant White Lightning

Monster Mutant White Lightning

Monster apparently decided to dip its toe into the world of caffeinated sodas and I’m pretty sure we all missed it. The only time I have ever come across this in the wild has been in discount or discontinued sections. My reasoning for this is that Monster themselves helped to make such products obsolete. Energy drinks are so common place now that I can’t even tell you the last time I heard someone say that they were getting sleepy so they needed some caffeine and then have them grab a Mountain Dew. To be fair it seems like that particular company is doing just fine, but I believe that is because they are an institution and there is an extreme culture based around it. Even they have branched out into actual energy drinks though with Amp. I’m sure there are kids out there who I really hope aren’t drinking energy drinks, which would down bottle after bottle of this on sleepovers or video game binges. The sad thing is that it’s no longer out of the ordinary to see young teens downing cans of Monster, and yes, it always seems to be Monster with children.

As for the flavor is this, White Lightning is apparently code for really diet tasting. It reminds me of a diet version of Frosh by Faygo. I haven’t had that in probably 30 years so I could be way off, but that’s what my brain is putting together. It’s kind of citrus, but really just diet.

I just looked up the Mutant website and did a product search and apparently every 711 everywhere carries these, so perhaps I was wrong and it was financially sound for them to put out this product. Fans of mini marts everywhere just may be celebrating this as they sit on the curb with their nachos and chili dogs. I may in fact be that out of touch and perhaps we should just hang out Thirsty Dudes.

Website
http://www.monsterenergy.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink, Soda Pop
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on August 17th, 2018
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Kapoya Energy Drink Mango Passion Fruit

Kapoya Energy Drink Mango Passion Fruit

The following things are generally bad news for beverage companies. 1. Your products are found at Big Lots at a discounted rate (Say, oh I dunno… 33 cents per can). 2. You make beverages and us here at Thirsty Dudes have never heard of your company, and we are not 100% sure how to pronounce its name. 3. Your social media presence seems to have dried up (perhaps you haven’t made a post in nearly two years). If all three of these things ring true, then it’s more than likely that the company has folded and that once the shelves are clear I will never hear a word about the company again. In this case it’s kind of a shame because for some reason that I cannot understand I do not hate this companies products. They are diet energy drinks that rely on the natural side of things to provide said energy. It’s all B vitamins and caffeine in here. They are proud of the fact that they do not use taurine, but the strange thing is that energy drinks that do contain that specific ingredient tend to be the ones that taste like melted candy. Even without it each of these flavors taste like a melted Free-Z-Pop. Since the demise of this company seems to have already occurred, I’m going to pull a first time move here on Thirsty Dudes and just write one review and use it for all of the flavors, because I don’t think this is going to be much help to anyone looking to try something new, unless they see it immediately and rush to Big Lots before the space is swapped out for another doomed product.

Blue Raspberry: It’s a diet version of a flavor that doesn’t really exist in nature. Blue raspberries aren’t a real thing, so why do so many companies use it as a flavor? If you are reading this, chances are you know exactly what this flavor tastes like. Now just make that diet and you have what’s in this can.
Mango Passionfruit: This is the flavor that is probably closest to the fruits it’s meant to impersonate. It is ridiculously sweet. While there is no sugar in here there are loads of sucralose. This is the flavor I thought I would enjoy the most and while it’s perfectly serviceable I enjoyed the last one the most.

Wild Grape: You know how grapes taste? Do you also know how grape flavored things taste? Well this falls on the latter side of the divide. I don’t know why I really enjoy the taste of fake grape. I mean I love the real thing too, but sometimes on a nice hot day I just want a mouthful of fake grape. Maybe it has something to do with a childhood memory. Who knows? All I know is I enjoyed this more than I expected to, even in all its diet glory.

Finally, I don’t know if Kapoya just missed the Stevia train, but I feel like had these used it as their zero calorie sweetener they may have been able to get away with labeling these as “all natural” and I’m sure that would have helped to move more units for more than $.33 each.

Website
http://kapoyaenergy.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on May 24th, 2018
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Kapoya Energy Drink Wild Grape

Kapoya Energy Drink Wild Grape

The following things are generally bad news for beverage companies. 1. Your products are found at Big Lots at a discounted rate (Say, oh I dunno… 33 cents per can). 2. You make beverages and us here at Thirsty Dudes have never heard of your company, and we are not 100% sure how to pronounce its name. 3. Your social media presence seems to have dried up (perhaps you haven’t made a post in nearly two years). If all three of these things ring true, then it’s more than likely that the company has folded and that once the shelves are clear I will never hear a word about the company again. In this case it’s kind of a shame because for some reason that I cannot understand I do not hate this companies products. They are diet energy drinks that rely on the natural side of things to provide said energy. It’s all B vitamins and caffeine in here. They are proud of the fact that they do not use taurine, but the strange thing is that energy drinks that do contain that specific ingredient tend to be the ones that taste like melted candy. Even without it each of these flavors taste like a melted Free-Z-Pop. Since the demise of this company seems to have already occurred, I’m going to pull a first time move here on Thirsty Dudes and just write one review and use it for all of the flavors, because I don’t think this is going to be much help to anyone looking to try something new, unless they see it immediately and rush to Big Lots before the space is swapped out for another doomed product.

Blue Raspberry: It’s a diet version of a flavor that doesn’t really exist in nature. Blue raspberries aren’t a real thing, so why do so many companies use it as a flavor? If you are reading this, chances are you know exactly what this flavor tastes like. Now just make that diet and you have what’s in this can.
Mango Passionfruit: This is the flavor that is probably closest to the fruits it’s meant to impersonate. It is ridiculously sweet. While there is no sugar in here there are loads of sucralose. This is the flavor I thought I would enjoy the most and while it’s perfectly serviceable I enjoyed the last one the most.

Wild Grape: You know how grapes taste? Do you also know how grape flavored things taste? Well this falls on the latter side of the divide. I don’t know why I really enjoy the taste of fake grape. I mean I love the real thing too, but sometimes on a nice hot day I just want a mouthful of fake grape. Maybe it has something to do with a childhood memory. Who knows? All I know is I enjoyed this more than I expected to, even in all its diet glory.

Finally, I don’t know if Kapoya just missed the Stevia train, but I feel like had these used it as their zero calorie sweetener they may have been able to get away with labeling these as “all natural” and I’m sure that would have helped to move more units for more than $.33 each.

Website
http://kapoyaenergy.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on May 24th, 2018
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Kapoya Energy Drink Blue Raspberry

Kapoya Energy Drink Blue Raspberry

The following things are generally bad news for beverage companies. 1. Your products are found at Big Lots at a discounted rate (Say, oh I dunno… 33 cents per can). 2. You make beverages and us here at Thirsty Dudes have never heard of your company, and we are not 100% sure how to pronounce its name. 3. Your social media presence seems to have dried up (perhaps you haven’t made a post in nearly two years). If all three of these things ring true, then it’s more than likely that the company has folded and that once the shelves are clear I will never hear a word about the company again. In this case it’s kind of a shame because for some reason that I cannot understand I do not hate this companies products. They are diet energy drinks that rely on the natural side of things to provide said energy. It’s all B vitamins and caffeine in here. They are proud of the fact that they do not use taurine, but the strange thing is that energy drinks that do contain that specific ingredient tend to be the ones that taste like melted candy. Even without it each of these flavors taste like a melted Free-Z-Pop. Since the demise of this company seems to have already occurred, I’m going to pull a first time move here on Thirsty Dudes and just write one review and use it for all of the flavors, because I don’t think this is going to be much help to anyone looking to try something new, unless they see it immediately and rush to Big Lots before the space is swapped out for another doomed product.

Blue Raspberry: It’s a diet version of a flavor that doesn’t really exist in nature. Blue raspberries aren’t a real thing, so why do so many companies use it as a flavor? If you are reading this, chances are you know exactly what this flavor tastes like. Now just make that diet and you have what’s in this can.
Mango Passionfruit: This is the flavor that is probably closest to the fruits it’s meant to impersonate. It is ridiculously sweet. While there is no sugar in here there are loads of sucralose. This is the flavor I thought I would enjoy the most and while it’s perfectly serviceable I enjoyed the last one the most.

Wild Grape: You know how grapes taste? Do you also know how grape flavored things taste? Well this falls on the latter side of the divide. I don’t know why I really enjoy the taste of fake grape. I mean I love the real thing too, but sometimes on a nice hot day I just want a mouthful of fake grape. Maybe it has something to do with a childhood memory. Who knows? All I know is I enjoyed this more than I expected to, even in all its diet glory.

Finally, I don’t know if Kapoya just missed the Stevia train, but I feel like had these used it as their zero calorie sweetener they may have been able to get away with labeling these as “all natural” and I’m sure that would have helped to move more units for more than $.33 each.

Website
http://kapoyaenergy.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on May 24th, 2018
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Protein2o Protein Infused Water Harvest Grape

Protein2o Protein Infused Water Harvest Grape

I’ve been kind of into protein drinks lately. I mean as much as you can get into them, which is to say I’ve been drinking them somewhat regularly. I realized I have a big portion control problem when it comes to eating. If there is food in front of me I will just absentmindedly eat it. The fact that I sometimes eat a ridiculous amount without thinking about it, leads me to overeat during regular meals because my stomach is stretched (that’s science right?). I’ve found that protein drinks help me to not eat between meals so much. I’ll have one instead of a snack (which is probably a meal to most) and it helps curb my appetite. It’s also nice that it helps with muscle building and it makes me feel like I’m not wasting my time at the gym and I’m getting better results. That is far too much background information just so that I can say I was excited when these showed up in the mail. Good timing is always appreciated.

This bottle has 15g of whey protein. I generally prefer to get my protein from plant sources, but exceptions can be made. It’s grape flavored, but it contains no juice, so that means it tastes like a melted Free-Z-Pop, which I am more than okay with. Normally fake fruit flavors bother me, but for some reason I’m into fake grape. The whey protein gives it a slightly milky taste. It’s not so much like an orange cream, but it’s there around the edges. The grape is still in the foreground though. Mike said that the Tropical Coconut one he had was a bit chalky, but I’m not getting that with this flavor. It’s sweetened with sucralose, which I didn’t realize until after I had finished it, which is also a good sign, because I didn’t taste anything diet in there. Overall this is pretty nice for a grab and go protein drink.

Website
http://www.drinkprotein2o.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Sports/Dietary Supplement
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on May 12th, 2018
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Protein2o Protein Infused Water Tropical Coconut

Protein2o Protein Infused Water Tropical Coconut

Pina colada. Not too shabby, right? It’s a little cup of summertime. I think it's illegal in most states to sell it when it's not summer. It would devalue it too much. It would also taste bad since the environmental climate is unbalanced in respect to the required prerequisites of the pineapple and coconut. Science stuff, man. Just trust us.

This is full of protein and you can taste it in every sip. There is no getting around it. It's amazing this is a liquid and not sludge. 15 grams of protein is no joke. It tastes a bit chalky, as you would probably guess. Even six hours of refrigeration can't save you from it. It tastes alright, though. Chalk aside. It has a good pina colada taste but you can taste the immense amount of protein and you can also taste the sucralose that makes it a little gross but a whole bottle clocking in at sixty calories is not an easy feat. Cut whatever corners you have to.

All in all, if you are trying to bulk up (bro) this isn't a bad place to start. Gains.

Website
http://www.drinkprotein2o.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Sports/Dietary Supplement, Water
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on May 2nd, 2018
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Hype Energy MFP Sugar Free

Hype Energy MFP Sugar Free

What does MFP stand for? Major Focused Power? Majestic Forest Provider? Metallica Forever Peeps? Ohh Ohh, maybe it’s Milk for President. All of the above are wrong. After some internet searching it came out that it actually means Money From Patience, wait no that’s not it either. It’s really “Most Full Power.” Seeing as it’s originally from the Netherlands and this is made in Poland I will chalk that up to a poor translation, though my times I’ve spend in both countries the English people spoke was not broken at all. The name isn’t all that exciting, but the cryptic MFP with no explanation on the can gets the desired effect.

Names aside the flavor of this is what is to be expected from a diet energy drink. It tastes like liquid candy that had all its sugar replaced with a zero calorie substitution. It’s nothing new, it’s nothing exciting, but it gets the job done. Normally it’s hard for me to drink a full diet beverage, but the base flavor of energy drinks is either strong to enough to mask, or blends in with the sucralose garbage flavor and it makes it palatable. So it’s got that going for it.

Website
http://www.hype.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sucralose
Categories
Diet, Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on April 8th, 2018
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