Archer Farms (10 reviews)

Archer Farms Cold Brew Cinnamon

Archer Farms Cold Brew Cinnamon

Fall is upon us. What does that mean? Cinnamon. Ahh, cinnamon. Natures...cinnamon. I bought this because it was A: Cheap and B: Had a great selling line on the side which I will put here:

This creamy and sweet cinnamon cold brew coffee is big on taste with a warm, velvety texture.

So's I buy it, bring it in to work and have two dudes try it and the consensus is as follows: It's bad. Not even OK. It's not good. It tastes like someone made a passable cold brew and then dumped too much ground cinnamon in it, said to themselves, "Welp, no turning back now." put in one more pinch, and bottled it up.

The coffee is fine. I don't drink too much and what I do drink is cold brew and typically has some sort of disgusting chemical chocolate taste to it so I'm not one to judge but this coffee was light at best. The cinnamon was a ground cinnamon and not a candy cinnamon. After tasting it, though, I don't know which I would have preferred. Thumbs down, Archer Farms/Target. There's more to fall than cinnamon. There's more to you than bad cold brew. I feel like I just masochistically did "the cinnamon challenge" to myself. I feel like a moron.

Website
http://sites.target.com/site/en/supertarget/page.jsp?title=brands&brand=archerFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Coffee
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on September 27th, 2017
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Archer Farms Coffee Energy Drink Mocha

Archer Farms Coffee Energy Drink Mocha

Rain? Again? Drats. I've got so much gardening to do. What do you think, pup? What do we do? Sit inside and play video games? Pup, I'm not twelve anymore. I've got responsibilities and that rhubarb isn't going to make a pie out of itself. First thing's first, you've got to get a fresh bowl of water and some food. I've got to tell you, your food smells terrible. I suppose that your breath is the product of your food. Problem solved. I've got to wake up a little bit. Hey, do you know if your mom drank that...oh no. Here it is. Good. Archer Farms, pup, I don't know. I'm fifty-fifty on this stuff. It's half good and half real bad. I don't know what to expect but it says "coffee energy" so I'm going to take it at face value.

Hmm. That's not bad. It is way more mocha than coffee. Not much coffee at all. It's smooth, though, and that's nice. I hope this give me the pep to just bear the elements and take care of the garden. I'm telling you, pup. You take one day off and your garden looks like a pile of garbage. This drink is all right. It's not bad. It might be too sweet since it's closer to chocolate milk than coffee. I don't typically drink chocolate milk at eight in the morning so this is the start to a very strange day.

You know what, pup. You and I are going to see if this rain is going to subside. I don't want to have to towel you off because, let's face it, you're going to get muddy because you're short and you always get muddy. You also hate your little beans to be cleaned for some reason so let's sit in here for a bit, not brush our teeth, and catch up where we left off in Sonic 3. I'm stuck at that part where you've got super sonic and then you have to ride that dumb cart across the water, Knuckles punches you, and by the time you get to Dr. Robotnik, you have no rings. I hate it. Every time, pup, every time.

Website
http://sites.target.com/site/en/supertarget/page.jsp?title=brands&brand=archerFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Coffee, Energy Drink
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on January 12th, 2012
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Archer Farms Coffee Energy Drink Vanilla

Archer Farms Coffee Energy Drink Vanilla

Well this isn't good. I do enjoy a nice coffee drink, not to be confused with actual coffee, which I can't stand. Strange right? Welp, what are you going to do? This is very vanilla and, as reported by two separate colleagues, metallic tasting, which is not a strong selling feature unless you are advertising to sell to a tired goat. As for the energy, I don't get any "energy drink" taste. Mostly it just tastes like the vanilla and milk. I also did not get much coffee, which I was hoping for.

I will say that if we were playing darts, you know, Target CEO Gregg W. Steinhafel and I, I would think they were hitting a ton of low, non-counting numbers like three, or eight, because this drink missed the mark. It's missing what I wanted and expected. Now, Gregg might be a fantastic dartsman, but in the game where I asked him to play like this drink was playing, I beat him and looked great doing it. I didn't rub his face in it and I bought him a root beer for being a good sport.

Website
http://sites.target.com/site/en/supertarget/page.jsp?title=brands&brand=archerFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Coffee, Energy Drink
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on January 5th, 2012
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Archer Farms Simply Balanced Blackberry Blueberry Drink Mix

Archer Farms Simply Balanced Blackberry Blueberry Drink Mix

Blackberry and blueberry? Is there a line that I can draw a giant, red "x" on because I want it. Oh, I can simply pay a little more than $2 and buy it? I suppose that is just as easy. Mix in water? Childs play. No problem. I can mix stuff and remember not to breath while the deadly fruit dust occupies my nasal cavities.

Oh...hold on a second here. What went wrong? Sixteen ounces of water, check. Mix, check. Mixed, check. Clean glass? Check. What's the deal? It smells great. Inviting. I keep going back for more but why? It has a bit of a bitter taste to it. It tastes like water first, or just wildly weak juice, which is strange, then like a sucralose taste, even those there aren't any unnatural sweeteners. I'm counting Stevia as a natural sweetener here, folks. It's almost bitter and it is not until the end when you get a woosh of fruit and cool Stevia sweetness. Yes, the final battle is worth coming back for more and I have almost finished my entire glass, but at what cost?

If you are down with diet drinks, this will be an easy fight for you. If you, like me, saw a naturally diet drink mix that comes in delicious flavors and think that you are on to something, you are only half right.

Website
http://sites.target.com/site/en/supertarget/page.jsp?title=brands&brand=archerFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
Stevia Extract
Categories
Diet, Mix/Concentrate, Water
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on January 3rd, 2012
Comments
View and Leave A Comment
Buy Now
Archer Farms Blackberry Blueberry Drink Mix 8-0.16 Oz Packets

Archer Farms Simply Balanced Berry Pomegranate Fruit Smoothie

Archer Farms Simply Balanced Berry Pomegranate Fruit Smoothie

It seems like just yesterday I was complaining about the specifics of what truly makes a smoothie. I argued that seeds, thickness, and stuff make a smoothie and this is way closer. It's also not made with coconut milk so we are closer still. This also tastes delicious and would be loved by all if given the opportunity to take a swig. Oh, the diseases that would go around if everyone shared a bottomless bottle of this drink. Everyone would be ill.

This is good. Get it. It's at Target.

Website
http://sites.target.com/site/en/supertarget/page.jsp?title=brands&brand=archerFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Smoothie
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on November 6th, 2011
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Archer Farms Italian Soda Blood Orange

Archer Farms Italian Soda Blood Orange

Often times, nay, most times, I am surly. I've always got something to say about everything. I am not awful to be around, but I can get tiring. I know people worse than myself, but I'm man enough to admit it. I enjoy the company of others who complain, but to a certain point. I like to think that I complain in a humorous, reflective way, where others just don't know how to have a good time. This drink had good intentions, but as far as I'm concerned, it's just a good orange pop. Like the great Paul F. Tompkins once said, "The best barbecue is only good barbecue." Orange pop is alright if you're at a party or if you're nine. I guess it's also alright if you're going to have blood orange so you can call yourself "worldly" or some garbage, but this to me just tasted very medium. I've had an excellent blood orange Frizzante before, but this doesn't do it. Orange pop is just orange pop to me.

Website
http://sites.target.com/site/en/supertarget/page.jsp?title=brands&brand=archerFarms
Country
Italy
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Juice, Soda Pop, Sparkling
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on March 24th, 2011
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Archer Farms Italian Soda Wild Berry

Archer Farms Italian Soda Wild Berry

It's 1991. City of Compton. Rough, rough streets. Kids killing kids over things you and I would laugh at. They don't laugh, they kill, as I mentioned before. Not a day goes by where you don't hear a gun shot or at very least, a domestic dispute. These are hard times. Hard times turn people to drink. Alcohol. 40's. Big alcohol. 40's are like the party sub of malt liquor.

Here's my proposal. Let's go back in time and instead of having overpriced bodegas sell 40's of St. Ides, carry the 40(ish)'s of Archer Farms Wild Berry. People could have been in a bad mood because of financial times and street warfare, but they also could have been upset at the fact that they were drinking a clearly low quality beverage. Archer Farms Wild Berry Italian soda is a bright, clean, and crisp drink. So many flavors roll across your tongue with every sip, like elderberry and blackcurrant to name a few...and it's more than affordable.

Cleaning up the streets is a rough job and since it clearly can't be left in the under-capable hands of O'Shea Jackson, leave it up to the Archer Farms Italian soda lineup.

Website
http://sites.target.com/site/en/supertarget/page.jsp?title=brands&brand=archerFarms
Country
Italy
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Juice, Soda Pop, Sparkling
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on March 15th, 2011
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Archer Farms Simply Balanced Pomegranate Yumberry

Archer Farms Simply Balanced Pomegranate Yumberry

My girlfriend got this drink, got maybe 1/4 through it, and said she really didn't like it and offered it up to me. I was expecting it to be completely terrible. As it turns out it wasn't that bad. It's much better than the passion fruit mango one I had a while ago. It really doesn't taste like green tea at all to me though. I guess it's that "green tea powder" I mentioned in my last review. This one does actually taste like pomegranate though. So it's got that going for it. I think if Archer Farms started actually brewing the green tea instead of using the powder, they would have a pretty decent drink on their hands.

Website
http://sites.target.com/site/en/supertarget/page.jsp?title=brands&brand=archerFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on October 4th, 2010
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Archer Farms Simply Balanced Passion Fruit Mango

Archer Farms Simply Balanced Passion Fruit Mango

Wow. Pretty much all I can taste in this drink is the "instant tea powder." It tastes like the gross drinks your mother would try to pass off as iced tea when you were younger. How do you make tea into a powder anyways? It also tastes nothing like mango at any stretch of the imagination. Maybe I detect a slight hint of passion fruit, but it's mostly that tea powder and the pear juice concentrate that they used as an inexpensive flavor enhancer. I will be staying away from this in the future.

Website
http://sites.target.com/site/en/supertarget/page.jsp?title=brands&brand=archerFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on September 30th, 2010
Comments
View and Leave A Comment

Archer Farms Italian Soda Orange Passion Mango

Archer Farms Italian Soda Orange Passion Mango

Archer Farms is Target's store brand. Their products always seem to be on the higher end of quality. This drink does not disappoint. It's a very fruity flavorful Italian Soda. Orange is definitely the front running flavor, but the others are present as well. It also has a strange flavor that reminds me of banana Runts. When I first drank it I swore there was some banana in it. I actually wouldn't shut up about it. I later checked the ingredients and discovered I was wrong. Strange. Even with the phantom banana flavor, it's still better than 90% of the Italian sodas out there. Even those that are made in fancy coffee shops.

Website
http://sites.target.com/site/en/supertarget/page.jsp?title=brands&brand=archerFarms
Country
United States
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Juice, Soda Pop, Sparkling
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on September 9th, 2010
Comments
View and Leave A Comment
<< previous | | next >>