Emmi - 2 Reviews

Programmers are strange cats. Not all of them but some of them. I once did a website for a website company. I know, I know. Seems dumb. Well it was dumb. Why they didn't do it internally is beyond me. I then later went to apply to a job there and didn't get it. It was a bummer because it is the best paying place for programmers in the area but it's kind of a dead end. It's one of those places that are like the equivalent of a call center where you're just with your computer in a cubicle, cut off from the world with just endless, monotonous coding. Not for me.

Point being is that I went there and took a tour when I was meeting with some people and saw the senior developer office and it was lined with cans of pop. It might have been assorted pop or it might have been exclusively Mountain Dew, but either way the entire wall was covered. Desk: covered. Floor: littered. This place also had coffee on the cheap and people drank it by the gallon. Problem with that is that you turn into one of those munches that is always drinking coffee and feel like they need it to survive. Blood, air, and coffee. It's annoying. You know what else is annoying while I'm on the topic? Twelve years old kids drinking coffee. You're too young. Cut that crap out. You're going to be a terrible adolescent. More than that is when twelve years old kids are drinking coffee with their parents. I've noticed that it is mostly with moms. I'm not saying that from a sexist standpoint, I'm saying it from an observation standpoint. Moms give kids coffee way too soon and they are just setting them up for one crappy kid.

So. Topic. Coffee. Actually cappuccino. This cappuccino is good. It's more coffee than those cappuccino powders that I used to love. It's a pretty standard, pre-packaged cappuccino flavor, but it tastes genuine, as if it was made from actual coffee, like Emmi has their priorities in check and are passionately brewing coffee one pot at a time for use in this drink. It's cold and sweetened, something that typical coffee or cappuccino isn't by standard. Maybe that's what I don't like about coffee is the temperature and bitterness. Dude, coffee isn't for me.

Well good morning, gorgeous. How are you? Good? I made you something. I made you this mocha latte. Just my way of saying "I love you." Go ahead. Yeah, it is cold. It's an iced latte. You know, the fancier things in life. I don't want to drink something hot first thing in the morning. It throws my whole mouth out of whack. You know, like how I don't like to open my eyes right away or I am "officially" awake. You didn't know that I did that? Well, we've only been together a short time. I don't expect you to know everything about me just yet.

Do you like it? Yeah, I enjoy making fresh coffee in the privacy of my own house. It's just a hobby I have. What do you think of it? It's nice, right? Good chocolate flavor and just the right amount of coffee where you feel like you could drink it anywhere. Oh, you have to go to the bathroom? I'll hold it for you while you go.

What, honey? I couldn't hear you over the radio. What did you say? Oh, you found this Emmi Caffe Latte cup in the garbage? You got me. You caught me. I just poured that into my best "Gnomes on Ice" commemorative drinking glass. I don't make coffee from home. I don't even like coffee. While you were sleeping, I went to the store and bought it. I did buy it for you, so that should count right? Oh, you never want to see me because I'm a known liar like Jason Draper of Thirsty Dudes? Welp, can't win 'em all, I guess.