High Fructose Corn Syrup (495 reviews)

Tropical Fantasy Cocktails Blue Raspberry

Tropical Fantasy Cocktails Blue Raspberry

Does anyone in the world actually like cheap blue raspberry pop? I think not. As a result they open it, take a few sips and then leave it out to lose its carbonation. That is what this tastes like a crappy soda that no longer has bubbles and vaguely tastes like a melted Freezepop. It’s candy in fake juice form. I can’t even imagine that children would truly like this. What can you expect for $.50 though?

Website
http://www.tropicalfantasy.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Juice
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on October 1st, 2013
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Turkey Hill Green Tea Mango

Turkey Hill Green Tea Mango

Further adventures in the world of Pennsylvanian iced tea lead us to the wild world of Turkey Hill. Grab your gizzards and let’s go. First though, let’s discuss what came first the gas station or the tea? According to Wikipedia the tea came before the stores, but it was also preceded by ice cream and milk that was originally sold from the back of a car, creep style in the 30’s. Now that that is covered, let’s talk some mango green tea.

This has a good generic green tea taste to it. It does have a nice smooth mango flavor as well. Overall it is not of the same quality as high-end teas, but you know what? Sometimes you just want the taste of a cheaper tea. Speaking of cheap, at the Turkey Hill store I purchased this from they were four for $5. That’s a whole mess of tea for very little money. It’s a deal that can’t be beat. They sweeten it with both corn syrup and real sugar, which is a decision I don’t understand. Are they really saving that much money by splitting it up?

As far as tea of the Keystone state go Turkey Hill is on the top of the heap. They make a great mid level tea, that you don’t get sick of, even when sipping on a half gallon all day.

Website
http://turkeyhill.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on October 1st, 2013
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Arizona Golden Bear Lemonade With Mint

Arizona  Golden Bear Lemonade With Mint

Arizona just keeps expanding their beverage lines. They have come out with at least a dozen new flavors this summer alone. I have a feeling that they may have more drinks available for purchase in the United States than any other company. Okay, I’m sure Coke or Pepsi has more if you count all their subsidiaries, but each of these proudly states that it is an Arizona product. Sure a decent amount of these drinks leave something to be desired, but a good portion of them are straight up pleasant.

After some success with their Jack Nicklaus Golden Bear line of lemonades they decided to expand a little and released this mint lemonade. Mint is a hard game to play. It’s so easy to get overzealous and leave the consumer feeling like they are drinking something whilst chewing gum, or shortly after brushing their teeth. No one wants that, especially not the Golden Bear himself. In this formula Arizona decided to take it easy on the mint, so that there is just a hint in each sip. The lemonade itself isn’t all that bitter, due to the use of HFCS, but it’s something I can get around a lot of the time and in this instance, I can even thoroughly enjoy. This is a nice treat that would cool anyone down on a hot summer day on the greens.

Website
http://drinkarizona.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Lemonade
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on September 30th, 2013
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Big Shot Pineapple

Big Shot Pineapple

New Orleans, I would one day like to be inside of you. The love for Cajun spiced food runs deep in my veins. I also hear that you make fantastic sweet tea. You know what you don't make well? Pineapple pop. This, without any sort of hesitation, is the worst pineapple pop I have ever had. I think I know why you don't make good pineapple pop. It's because you don't know anything about pineapples.

Look, I'm from New York. What do we know about pineapple? Nothing. You can say that right back at me and I have to agree with you. We are in this together, The South.

Now that you know that we know about each other's strong suits, I'm really going to hammer it home. This is awful. It is a dense, thick, syrupy abomination of a drink. I don't know how this left the test bed. It's so bad. Maybe it's the tester's fault. Perhaps all that Cajun spice has dulled your taste buds like when you stupidly use a knife to cut things like rocks and stuff. Dull. Flat. Terrible. Your spices and your crawdads? You've got that nailed, buddy. This though, leave it in the dust. It blows.

Website
http://www.nolacajun.com/Big-Shot-Soda_p_13.html
Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Soda Pop
Rating
1/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on September 23rd, 2013
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Toronja Sol Grapefruit Soda

Toronja Sol Grapefruit Soda

I am currently on tour in California and found this at a cafe in Goleta. I love grapefruit soda so I jump at the opportunity to try new kinds anytime I can. The more sour the better. If a soda can make my mouth pucker, it's an almost guaranteed 4-bottle rating.

Is this a mouth puckering soda? Sadly no. It's moderately sour, but nothing too special. It's a decent grapefruit soda, definitely better than most.

Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Soda Pop
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Derek Neuland on August 26th, 2013
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Push Fruit Punch

Push Fruit Punch

You know that I drink a lot of stuff, right people? A lot. I would say that we drink more drinks that 99% of the rest of the world which, finally, puts us into that equal parts idolized and hated 1%. Ahh, the one percent. The air up here is just nicer to breathe. Filled with the scents of the most exotic of woods and scented oils. The people are all very easy to look at and their clothes are made from materials so soft that if the rest of you heathens as much as touched them, you would never be able to touch anything else because your fingertips would quite literally revolt from your hands. You will have to wait for eye scanning because your fingertips will be blank and you will never be able to use a biometric scanner ever again. Our hair is styled from both the greatest living hairstylists for free as our shoes are shined by perfect robotic representations of the world's finest dead shoe shiners.

We are also provided, at gratis, the finest drinks. We receive soda pop with all natural flavors and just the right amount of fizz. What do you get? You get drinks like this that could be personified as boring, tired, and characterless. While I am drinking something that was made from fresh fruit, you are drinking something that in every sense of the word is artificial. I am drinking something carbonated to my liking and you are drinking this drink that might as well be a juice due to the lack of fizz.

In order to get where we have gotten you will have to work very hard, know the right people, and do some schmoozing. It's all part of a days work and since none of us have to work any more, it does leave time to clean up at the back nine, polish off a case or two of the finest cigars, once again, for free, and shop for things we don't need like chrome shoes, personal elephant groomers, diamond Montblanc pencils, and heated cat hats. Which reminds me, I've got to pay my tie repairman and personal closet organizer before the end of the week or my life will just be the pits.

Website
http://www.pushbeverages.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Soda Pop
Rating
2/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on August 26th, 2013
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Nehi Peach

Nehi Peach

There is both something about Mary and something about peaches. Mary had a certain "cuteness" and liked the "underachiever" a bit. That made her approachable but still frightening because there was no telling why she didn't like "normal" guys. Peaches are a bit more complex. It might be due to my hatred of using napkins and my simultaneous hatred towards leaky fruit but I don't like 'em. This, though, I wish it had some sort of nutritional value because it's good.

Yeah, I know. Us drink elitists should have higher standards when it comes to what we like but this, HFCS and all, is pretty good and at the top of the charts when it comes to peach pop, not that there is a lot of competition. What do I like about it? It's adequate sweetness and the fact that it doesn't linger like that friend from high school that wants to catch up with you when you're carrying two gallons of milk and a handful of groceries and are on the phone with your mom.

Even with that glowing recommendation, I cannot finish a simple coffee cup full of it, let alone the generous portion inside of the bottle itself. Fruit pop does that to me.

Website
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Nehi-Soda/51641617507
Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Soda Pop
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on August 21st, 2013
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Nehi Soda Peach 2 Lt (Pack Of 8)

Lotte Sac Sac Orange

Lotte Sac Sac Orange

Here I am stuck out in the middle of nowhere. I decided to rent this cabin for a week because I ran across an ad that had a picture of the most wondrous looking cabin with flowers everywhere in the yard. Apparently that picture was taken in 1972 because this place is a dump. There are mice turds everywhere and the ceiling is caving in on one of the rooms. I guess I should have known better as it was only $100 for the week. Ugh. The ad boasted that you would have the cleanest mountain water to drink from the well on the property. I wanted to get back to nature, so I packed light…I mean real light. I brought one change of clothes, a knife, a flashlight and some beans and rice to cook over a fire. The problem is that since this ad has been running since before I was a fetus, it didn’t take into consideration that the well has run dry. Here I am in a dilapidated cabin…okay, let’s be fair this is a shack at best and I have no water and no means to cook the limited food that I brought.

I found a hatch in the floor of the shed that led to some sort of makeshift basement pantry. There were a bunch of canned fruits and vegetables down there. I thought I was saved, but upon opening them most were completely spoiled. The only thing that I could find to eat was a jar of mandarin oranges. Those lasted me all of two minutes. I have been nursing the syrupy juice that was keeping them fresh though. It’s like drinking a mandarin orange juice, with a decent helping of sugar added to it. It’s not that bad, and sometimes I get a little strand of orange in the juice. Finding this cellar and it’s contents gave me a little hope, but I am now certain that I will die in these woods. If only I could survive I might try to market this juice. I would call it Sac Sac. Don’t ask why, I am delirious in a state of hunger. What do you mean, “Why don’t I just drive back to civilization?” I’ll tell you why, I am in touch with the Earth and I’ll be damned if I can’t survive off of the land for a week. One measly week! Why am I talking to a jar of spoiled pickled eggs? More importantly why is it asking me questions. All hops is truly lost.

Website
http://company.lottechilsung.co.kr/eng/
Country
Korea
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Juice
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on August 15th, 2013
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Day's Cream Soda

Day's Cream Soda

Like sands through the hourglass, these are the Day’s soda lines. Here we have the pride of Pennsylvania since 1946. That’s 19 years previous to the release of Days of our Lives. It’s rumored around the hills of Eastern PA that the show was created for a medium to run ads for the soda. Those people also think that a 14.4 dial up modem is modern technology, so I wouldn’t put much stake to their claim.

Day’s soda runs on the higher side of average sodas. They are similar to store brands, but they have a little extra something to them that make them a smidge better. For example, this bottle of cream soda is a bit smoother, and creamier than “generic” versions. It’s obscenely sweet (90g of sugar in this bottle), but it’s still very enjoyable. This is a soda that would be amazing in an ice cream float. Oh man, I wish I would have thought of that earlier when I had enough left in this bottle to make it a reality.

Website
http://www.dayssoda.com
Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Soda Pop
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on August 13th, 2013
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Fuze Iced Tea Lemon

Fuze Iced Tea Lemon

This falls under the category of iced tea that doesn’t taste like tea. It’s sugar water with flavoring that is similar to tea. There is no way that “tea powder” could result in a beverage that actually tastes like real tea. This falls in the same category as Nestea and Brisk. Actually it tastes like someone made some tea at home from a powder mix and combined it with some Brisk. I’m sure that a majority of the consumers out there will like this just fine, but over the years of writing for Thirsty Dudes I’ve become a low level tea snob, and this really just doesn’t cut it. I mean it’s perfectly drinkable, but it’s nothing like what I want an iced tea to be.

Website
http://www.drinkfuze.com/
Country
United States
Sweetener
High Fructose Corn Syrup
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on August 11th, 2013
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Fuze Lemon Tea - 16.9 oz. - 24 pk.
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