Pure Almond - 2 Reviews

Vegans, you're getting luckier by the day. Your hatred of animals and animal by-products is getting easier stronger and more beneficial. You are no longer segregated to the underground seed and nut parlors of old but now you are welcomed into the sunlight and above ground stores and restaurants. You are treated special without questions asked. Your influence is growing. Soon, no one will look at a cow the same way. Soon, Morrissey will have one less thing to be sad about.

This totally animal free drink is pretty great. Almond milk is thicker than soymilk so it's more "milkshakey" which means "better" in layman terms. I don't get a lot of dark chocolate but I might get "slightly shadier chocolate." I wouldn't give it the credit that it asks for since I am allowed to be critical on my own soapbox. That being said, it's still good.

Vegetarians and vegans, you may dance until the sun comes out for this drink passes the test of a carnivore. I have spoken and it has been said. I hereby sanction this drink as acceptable to all parties.

Jerry wasted much of his time trying to unlock the secret of the almond, mainly how to get “milk” from them. You see Jerry was absolutely disgusted by milk that came from animals. Rice milk tasted too much like rice for his liking. Soymilk was a good substitute for a while, but he soon learned that consuming a lot of it just wasn't healthy. It was at this point that almond milk entered his life. He loved the nuts, and he loved the milk. It just baffled him where the milk came from. The nuts were fairly dry themselves, but he did some experiments to compress moisture out of them and came up with failure. His next thought was that maybe the milk came from the almond plant, and not specifically from the nuts. He went to the local botanical gardens and checked out the trees. While he was able to get some liquid from them, it wasn't anything like what he bought at the grocer, and it wasn't anything that he would have liked to consume.

Disillusioned he finally gave in and looked it up on the internet. It was then that Jerry learned that almond milk was actually just ground up almonds in water. He felt like an idiot for not thinking of that, but it made sense. His favorite kind was the Silk unsweetened because it tasted the most like actually almonds, and really who needs extra sugar in their milk? Now that he knew how it was made, when he took a sip he could taste that it was exactly how it was made. It really just tasted like raw almonds in liquid form. It was wonderful.

That is the story of how almonds saved breakfast and how you can find out anything via the internet.