Fructose (39 reviews)
Way 2 Cool Micro Brewed Ginger Ale
S - Hey man I have an awesome drink for you to try.
L – Oh that’s cool. What is it?
S – You don’t even know man it’s Way 2 Cool.
L – Okay well what is it?
S – No man, the company is called Way 2 Cool. It’s ginger ale.
L – Oh I like ginger ale. Let me have a taste…..There is definitely something off about this ginger ale. Are you sure it’s not about a decade expired?
S – No man, that’s just the barley malt in it.
L – To quote my ex-roommate, “That’s the kind of thing you tell a goddamn man!” Seriously malt beverages can be decent, but it’s not the kind of thing that you sneak up on someone. If you don’t know it’s there the drink just tastes like it’s gone bad.
S – Dude, malt makes everything better….like liquor.
L – Okay, you’re just an idiot, and this drink isn’t very good. It’s most certainly isn’t “Way 2 Cool.” Actually it’s barely passable. I don’t even think I could finish this bottle. I like malt when it’s mixed with apple or pineapple, but it does not mix well with ginger. If it wasn’t for that stupid malt this would have actually probably been a decent ginger ale. It has real ginger in it, plus limejuice and cinnamon. I bet it would have been interesting, and more than likely tasty. Here I sit though trying to make it through this weird malt that is overpowering every other flavor, while somehow slightly tasting like moldy bread. I can’t believe that there is no mention of malt on the label besides the ingredients list. It’s just going to turn off 99% of the people that would buy this. Also dude, why on Earth does this label say “Free Tibet and Taos?” Isn’t that a bit insulting? I mean grouping in human rights activists with a couple of snowboarders that want a town to let them ride there? I’m beginning to think a bunch of suburban hippies started this company, and that makes sense why it tastes like garbage. Those type of hippies ruin everything.
S – But dude! If you drink to the top of the label and put in orange juice it’s a straight-edge brass monkey!
L – Oh my god, you are an idiot. Please never give me another drink. Actually, please never speak to me again. I think I became dumber in this brief conversation.
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Fructose
- Categories
- Soda Pop
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 3/12/2012
Way 2 Cool Micro Brewed Root Beer
This is one of those times that I REALLY wish a company had a working website. The website http://www.way2coolsodas.com is on the side of the bottle but it leads to nothing. I doubt this company is out of business because I found this bottle at a Whole Foods in Santa Fe, NM a few months ago. Since I have no way of contacting anyone from this company, I am going to conduct a fictional interview with their owner.
Who are you?
I'm Lloyd, I live in Santa Fe, NM and I founded Way 2 Cool Sodas.
Why did you name it "Way 2 Cool"
I was sitting in my dorm room one day and I was thinking about how awesome it would be if I made my own soda. I thought to myself that if I actually did it, it would be way too cool. So since I couldn't think of anything more radical than that, it stuck.
Do you realize that "Way 2 Cool" is possible the worst beverage name I have ever seen? Even Kronik is better than that.
No way dude! You just don't get it.
And look at the artwork on the bottle! It looks like someone on an acid trip painted it.
I painted that and I do not admit that I did an eighth of shrooms and smoked a bowl before painting it.
The only way the horrible name and art would be redeemable would be if this root beer was exceptional, but it's not. It's pretty generic tasting root beer. I wouldn't be surprised if you took Safeway brand root beer, poured it into these glass bottles, and called it "micro brewed"
That's like, your opinion man.
There you have it. How this got on the shelves of Whole Foods, I will never know.
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Fructose
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Derek Neuland on 2/8/2012
Clic Sparkling Water Beverage Mango
Before I even begin to think about describing the flavor of this drink I have to mention the packaging. Is it necessary? I don't know, but I can tell you that it is really, really cool, even if it is a bit impractical. It's like someone took a 20oz bottle, but it in half and put the top of a can of pop on top to seal the goodness in. I really don't see any benefits of this, besides looking awesome. The joy of plastic is that it is resealable, which this is not. Also, I don't know how well it would work for stacking the cans. It seems like they would fall over a lot easier with that bottom. Oh well, I'm not a stock boy so it's not my problem. I'll just sit back and admire the strangeness of it.
Now on for the purpose of this site, to let the public know how different beverages taste. I shockingly really enjoyed this. Flavored sparkling water isn't really my forte (I can't stand the seltzer taste), but I guess when you add a bunch of sugar to a carbonated water it technically becomes a pop. This tastes like a very light pop that actually tastes just like mangoes. There is no seltzer flavor in this can at all. My only issue is that by the time you get towards the bottom of the bottle/can (should we embrace "bottan" or "cannle" for it's name?) you get a slight hint of the aspartame that is hiding towards the bottom of the ingredients list. Other than that this is great with about half the sugar of normal soda.
- Website
- http://www.clicfoods.com
- Country
- China
- Sweetener
- Fructose
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 11/30/2011
- Buy Now
- none
Slap Green Tea Energy Crisp Apple
It's weird when a drink tastes exactly like the flavor it's supposed to be. Many times it's advertised to be something, but somewhere between the taste testers and the packaging department something went awry. Not with this Slap energy drink, it really tastes like a crisp apple with a slight green tea aftertaste. I'm glad it's not strong on the green tea because I am not a huge fan and was kind of dreading this drink for that reason.
This is a great energy drink because there's no gross taste to it. If you wouldn't have told me, I would have just thought it was an apple green tea soda. I wanted to write this review about someone slapping this can out of my hand and not caring, but I couldn't do it because it tastes too good.
- Website
- http://www.slapdrinks.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Fructose
- Categories
- Energy Drink
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Derek Neuland on 10/18/2011
Me Vivacious Tangerine Pineapple
If I am not mistaken this drink is all about me. Finally a drink for the egotistical and self centered geniuses of the world. I think it takes on a different flavor to suit whoever is drinking its taste buds. I have to say they had it dead on for me. Tangerine and pineapple are a way to my heart. They were on the road to perfection but then the creators got sidetracked and added erythritol as a third sweetener. Ugh. They have instantly turned my brain and me as a whole off. Had they left out that one tiny ingredient, that doesn't seem to play much of a role other than being gross, this would have been great. A buy and buy again beverage. As it stands it can sit dusty on the shelves.
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Fructose
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 10/2/2011
Sapanan Aloe Vera Drink White Grape
You know what I love? Discovering new Asian markets. It's a great feeling because that means that a new world is open for me to discover. I went in bright and early and bought everything they had that we hadn't done, including this rocket shaped aloe drink.
So as you can see, the first thing I noticed is the packaging, which is nothing short of awesome. Ergonomically designed and rocket shaped?! Sold, dude. Sold.
Taste-wise, it's just an aloe. It's white grape flavored aloe with giant chunks. The chunks are pretty good because every one you get and chew is like a flavor explosion in your mouth. If you were a glutton and had no self-restraint, you could have a grand finale by drinking the whole container and just going chew crazy.
I liked this drink and any fan of aloe should seek it out.
- Website
- http://www.sapanan.com
- Country
- Thailand
- Sweetener
- Fructose
- Categories
- Aloe Vera
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 9/14/2011
Me Curious Blueberry Lime
Isabelle! Isabelle! Come here! I made something that you have to like. I've been here in the basement for like seven hours mixing fruits and stuff into this one glass until I got it just right. Yeah, I rinsed it out in the basement sink. Yeah, Isabelle, the sink is dirty but the water that comes out is clean...I think. Irregardless, I made something. I mixed some blueberry juice and some limejuice that we had in the fridge that has never been used and made something. As soon as you drink this, you're going to say, "Colin, this is the best thing I've ever drank." Oh, and I also put some seltzer water in there to spice it up a little bit. I'm poured you a glass and it's over there on the washing machine. I think that it's the perfect mix and I don't think that I could do any better. Go take a sip.
Alright, you've taken a sip. What do you think? Oh, I hope that you like it. Wait...you...you don't like it? But...what's not to like. It's blueberries, which you love, and lime. What do you mean the mix is off? Isabelle, don't tell me my mix is off. My mix is perfect. Too much lime? Too sour? What?! Strange aftertaste? Is there something wrong with your mouth? You have been eating a lot of black jellybeans lately. Did you burn out your taste buds? This is perfect! I don't care what you say. Take another sip. Yes. Take another sip. Where are you going? Don't up upstairs. Turn the lights back on. It's dark down here. Don't leave me! Isabelle!
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Fructose
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Mike Literman on 9/2/2011
Me Unavailable Dragonfruit Blackberry
How is it that erythritol can be the last ingredient in a list of eleven, and it still is so present in the flavor of a drink? Why even bother adding it at that point? It seems like it's worthless as a sweetener, especially when fructose is the second ingredient. Perhaps they just added it for the flavor.
Other than the natural diet flavor this is pretty fruity. The dragonfruit is more prominent that the blackberry. It's would actually be a really decent tasting diet drink, but it's not really a diet drink so it's a regular drink that tastes diet. No one wants that.
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Fructose
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 7/28/2011
Pom Tea Pomegranate Blackberry Tea
Sometimes it's 90+ degrees out and you suddenly have the undying need to go out walk a creek and search for the worthy opponent General Sherman. For the record General Sherman is a catfish that lives in 18 Mile Creek out in the Derby/Hamburg area of New York. Rumor has it that his belly is filled with gold and the ultimate iced tea. Few people know of his existence and even fewer have lived to tell the tale of their battles with him. That is mainly because I think only three of us ever tried to catch him. I have had two encounters with he and all his glory through the years (last year). Editor Dan and I nearly had him once. He exited the water and we grabbed him, but his hide was just too slippery for us to keep a grasp.
So I returned, I saw the corpses of many catfish (three) but none of them were the General. He was nowhere to be found. Maybe he was laying in wait to build up his armies, or maybe he swam out into the lake. I doubt we'll ever know for sure. One thing that I do know is that I worked up one hell of a thirst on this adventure. I had hoped to quench it with the previously mentioned "ultimate tea" I was going to gather from the gullet of General Sherman, but since I failed I had to resort to POM tea.
To be fair it wasn't really a resorting to it, as POM makes some incredible tea. This flavor has the perfect blend of pomegranate and blackberries. I am a sucker for anything with blackberries in it, they are your money berry. Something strange happens in this tea. There is the great fruit and tea flavors, but there's something else. It almost tastes like mint. It has the same cool crispness, but without the actual mint flavor. I had never experienced this before this week, but this is the second drink I've had with this effect. I have to say I really enjoy it and it makes the drink that much more refreshing.
- Website
- http://www.pomwonderful.com
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Fructose
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 7/24/2011
Barons Boothill Sassparilla
For all my talk about cowboys; how I think they are awesome and how it's a possibly calling in my life, I am not a fan of western movies. Sometimes they are okay, but in general I find them boring and hokey. A lot of adults in my life growing up were into them, so I've seen a decent amount and they just don't do anything for me. The same thing goes for kung-fu movies. I'd rather watch Fletch for the 900th time than watch John Wayne or Clint Eastwood.
There are cowboys on this bottle and I have to say I don't think they would drink this. It's really good, but I would never in a million years pick it out as sarsaparilla in a blind taste test. I would bet all the tea in China that it was a fancy cola. Even with my eyes open and knowing what it is supposed to be, I'd still say it was a cola. It has a hint of root beer/sarsaparilla to it, but it's mostly a brewed cola taste. I really enjoyed it, but it doesn't taste like what it's supposed to, so I feel like I should deduct a bottle. Maybe that is John Wayne on the bottle and he thinks he's too good for "cowboy swill" and he just wanted a nice cola. The directors told him that it wouldn't work right in the film so they put it in a sarsaparilla bottle so it would look authentic. Damn fake cowboys ruining everything for everyone.
- Country
- United States
- Sweetener
- Fructose
- Rating
- Reviewed By
- Jason Draper on 5/26/2011
