Iced Tea (907 reviews)

Oriental Leaves Jasmine Tea

Oriental Leaves Jasmine Tea

Would you just look at that bottle? Is that the classiest looking bottle of iced tea you have ever seen, or what? It’s just a normal plastic bottle, but the shape and the cleanness of the design make it look much greater than it is. Little kids would look at this and think to themselves, “That looks like it is for grownups. I bet it burns like grandpappy’s juice.” I assure you the contents of this bottle are nothing like your grandfathers private stock, well unless your grandfather is a collector of fine teas. Those kids were right though. I bet if you gave this to 100 kids maybe 2 or 3 of them would enjoy it. It’s an unsweetened jasmine green tea, so it’s slightly bitter and tastes of flowers; two flavors kids tend to not like. It is what I like though. The jasmine flavor is just right. It’s not overpowering like some of Oriental Leaves’ competitors drinks are. This just hints at the floral and lets the green tea do most of the work. It’s tastes like a dream, and it makes me feel like more of a grown up than I will ever actually be. Oh, did I mention that I’m 33 and I spent more than 60 hours over the past two weeks playing Final Fantasy X? That’s right I spent more time playing a video game than most people work in a week. At least I get to pretend to be an adult sometimes.

Country
China
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
5/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on December 10th, 2012
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Hung Fook Tong Pear Tea Drink

Hung Fook Tong Pear Tea Drink

Hey Rog, I think you forgot something. No you definitely shut the stove off, and yes you remembered to feed the cats. What you forgot was to add the pears to this tea. I’m pretty sure you remembered to put everything else in, but I don’t taste even a splash of pear in here. It’s got that herbal, almost licorice, flavor that the wolfberry fruit, euphoria longan, coastal glehnia root and balloonflower root give it. I don’t know why we put all of those things in an iced tea, but it does give it a different taste. It’s also has that weird rock sugar sweetened flavor. I always thought that was an odd choice for a sweetener, to melt down rock candy. All of that stuff is there, but no pear whatsoever. You really must have forgotten to add it.

I know I’m not supposed to be drinking the product while working on the line, but hey I’m thirsty and I like to think I’m working quality control. Wait, why are you on the phone? You’re seriously calling security on me? For drinking one bottle of tea in the 35 years I’ve worked here? You’re a real jerk Rog. I hope your cats got annoyed at you always forgetting to feed them and they turned the stove back on and escaped out a window before burning your house down. That’s what jerks like you deserve.

Website
http://www.hungfooktong.com/tc/
Country
China
Sweetener
Rock Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on February 13th, 2013
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Hung Fook Tong Imperatae Cane Drink

Hung Fook Tong Imperatae Cane Drink

Is it possible to strain a liquid through a liquid? I suppose it would be. If you wanted to strain water through an oil, that would work. It's a matter of volume and separation. You may have to go through some sort of skimming process to take a layer off, but that works.

This drink, which sucks, tastes like you strained sweet tea through soup; iced tea through all the corn, peas, carrots, broth and the like. I gave this drink to our new employee slash my new coworker and she knocked it out of the park. I made her just smell it and she said that it smelled like water chestnuts and me, hating water chestnuts, am not too familiar with the scent. Number two ingredient after water? You guessed it, new girl: water chestnuts.
You're re-hired™. Take that, Donald Trump. I've coined my own phrase that people have been using for years and called it my own.

Website
http://www.hungfooktong.com/tc/
Country
China
Sweetener
Sugar Cane
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
1/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on March 4th, 2013
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Buy Now
Imperatae Cane Drink - 16.9oz [3 units] by Hung Fook Tong.

Oriental Leaves Farmer

Oriental Leaves Farmer

This is a nice bottle of tea. Perfect for all occasions. The only catch is that everything is in Chinese and there is no telling what is in a bottle of "Farmer" flavored tea. Hey, I'm just telling you what Google Translate is telling me and they told me that this is made up of ground up farmers.

If I may say so, farmers don't taste so bad. They're one with the earth. They probably aren't too many degrees away from tea. You and I, city folk, we're further. We're closer to things like plastics and rubber.

This tastes like a pretty generic black tea. Generic, safe, good quality, and foreign: a good combination. I would take unsweetened black tea from a Chinaman before I would take it from a Yankee. Is that racist? Call in the feds on this one. I think I'm in the right here.

Country
China
Sweetener
No Sugar Added
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on July 10th, 2013
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Master Kong Honey Jasmine Iced Tea

Master Kong Honey Jasmine Iced Tea

Honey jasmine, you say? No English on the bottle, you say? Hmm. Well...I'll take it! I'll take that and I'll take a delicious bahn mi. Now I will sit here and insult fourteen year old boys for not knowing about sriracha. I will talk about bands he hasn't heard of while listening to bands he hasn't heard of. I will take him through some rough streets whilst making jokes about adultery.

How do I feel about you? Well, I have mixed emotions about you. You are a good tea but you have your issues. You have a good, floral taste and you actually have that lovely bite from the green tea. You taste of jasmine and green tea and for that I applaud you. You are penalized for adding far too much sugar. It tastes like good sugar, but it is too much sugar. For that I do that thing where I rub my fingers in that "shame on you" or "tisk tisk."

All in all, we have insulted a kid for things you had no idea existed until you were well over his age and drank a decent tea. I'm not a betting man but I would have to say that you will have better days than this.

Website
http://www.masterkong.com.cn
Country
China
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on August 2nd, 2013
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Hung Fook Tong Qing Bu Liang Drink

Hung Fook Tong Qing Bu Liang Drink

On a recent trip to the Asian market Mark decided to get a bunch of things he had never heard of before to expand his palate’s horizons. He picked up some job’s tears seeds, fragrant solomonseal rhizome, lily bulbs, lotus seeds, longan, gordon euryale seeds, and coastal glehnia root. He was so proud of his haul that Mike went right home and set out to make supper. That is where the troubles arose. No matter what he did with any of these ingredients the results were not very tasty. He tried to make tofu, pasta and even went as far as sprinkling them on toast. All were a no go.

It was in a moment of frustration that Mark decided to juice boil all of the ingredients together along with some rock sugar he had inexplicably laying around. He decided that a tea would be his last ditch effort. In the final moments of the game, he finally got his break. It tasted decent hot, but he decided to put it on ice and see what he had. Once cold his “tea” took on a new life. It was fairly sweet in the way that only rock sugar can make things. He’s still convinced it’s just rock candy ground up. It tastes about the same. Everything else just kind of blended together in a way that he could only racially describe as Asian. The flavor of this tea is just not naturally found in the Western world. It’s hard to explain, but it tasted decent enough, so he drank it and was glad that his ingredients went to some productive use. It will be quite some time before Mark goes out and blindly buys unheard of ingredients again.

Website
http://www.hungfooktong.com/tc/
Country
China
Sweetener
Rock Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Jason Draper on September 17th, 2013
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Wahaha Russian Style

Wahaha Russian Style

Come on, dude. Let me down. I don't think that I deserve this. I swear I didn't steal that pack of gum. I've got like thirty dollars in my wallet. Why would I steal a one dollar pack of gum? Dollar fifty? Come on dude. This is a dollar gum and you know it. You're just ripping people off with that. I know people love it. It's a classic gum but that's no reason to overcharge just because you can. Let's just get back to the issue at hand here. Why am I being drawn and quartered? I told you I wasn't stealing that gum. I had some on me that you just so happen to be a brand you sell. Seriously, I'm telling you the truth. Man, this reminds me of that strange tea I had. What? Oh, now you're concerned about my opinion. Well I'll tell you but I would like you to let me go. I'll pay you double for the gum I didn't steal just so you let me down. This thing pulling me is getting quite uncomfortable.

Alright, so I met up with some friends and one gave me a tea that I couldn't read a single word to. Naturally I just drank it because I was thirsty. I took a sip and it tasted like someone poured jasmine tea into a beer and sweetened it with honey. I don't drink so this kind of took me for a loop. Why don't I drink? It's because I don't want to and don't think that I need to, that's why. Back to the tea, I love tea. I love it. When you pair it with beer, though, it goes down an infinite amount of pegs. When you have a nice jasmine tea sweetened with honey, though, it's a good thing. So I'm torn, much like I feel like my limbs are slowly ripping from my socket all over some stupid gum.

Oh, what? I don't know where it came from, maybe some Asian market. So what do you say, pal? Can you let me down? I've been good to you. I've promised you more money that you deserve. I've told you a tale of my past. How about you let me down? No? Well what do you want to talk about while my balls and sockets say goodbye? This is unbearable but I give you full credit for doing it with horses and not some medieval apparatus. Credit where credit's due, right?

Website
http://en.wahaha.com.cn/
Country
China
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on October 31st, 2013
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Farmer Springs Milk Tea Matcha

Farmer Springs Milk Tea Matcha

Jay loves matcha. Why did I review this then? Don't ask questions. That's why.

This was purchased as a local Asian grocery store I tend to go to. I brought my son thinking he might like some different snacks and treats. For the record I thought wrong. I bought him a mochi ball and he didn't like it. I bought him a chunky juice and he didn't like it.

This was good but even in the small bottle there is no way I could finish it. It does taste like matcha but after a while, you eventually lose the green tea taste and it starts to taste like the milk at the end of cereal. Once again, not bad, but exhausting and sweet. Not tooth rottingly sweet but too sweet for me to drink even this baby bottle.

Country
China
Sweetener
Fructose Syrup
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on June 7th, 2017
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Nongfu Spring Tea Peach Oolong

Nongfu Spring Tea Peach Oolong

It's been a long time since I've drank anything with this much sugar in it. There is sugar, presumably cane sugar, and also honey which makes this peach oolong taste fantastic. Seriously, this was great. If it had half the sugar, it might be better. The honey adds more flavor than it did sweetness but man, this was good. The peach flavor was good. I might say that the sugar overpowered the child custody arm wrestling match against the oolong to the point where it was just a "tea base" instead of something truly distinguishable.

Would I get this again? I don't think so. I would recommend it with the caveat of, "If you like sweet tea, you will love this." but my palate doesn't really do so hot against drinks like this anymore. It doesn't hurt the review but it would count against me telling other people to get it. Seriously, though. If you like sweetened, flavored tea, get this. Get this and you'll never drink a Brisk raspberry again. I know peach and raspberries are different fruits but if you are looking to become a better person in society, this over that.

Country
China
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea
Rating
4/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on January 3rd, 2019
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Kirin Afternoon Milk Tea Chocolate

Kirin Afternoon Milk Tea Chocolate

First of all, dudes at work don't know how I do. I invited six people to drink this and give me a review. I said, "Here's your chance to be on a famous website no different than if you were Caroline Rhea or Anthony Michael Hall." They laughed, threw tomatoes at me like this was the early 1900's. I didn't even know we had tomatoes in the office but there is some sort of secret closet that contains nothing but over-ripened tomatoes ready for the next bad joke or snake oil salesman. In this case, it was my attempt to make half a dozen dudes filthy rich like me. Your loss, turds. Your loss.

How's this? Well, it's fine. It tastes like chocolate milk. One said, "It tastes like hot cocoa. No. It tastes like Yoo-hoo." which I kind of agree with. If there is tea in this, and I'm not doubting there is, it is promptly and sufficiently overshadowed by sugar and chocolate. Is that the worst thing in the world? No. Is the fact that it is eight months past expiration date that really makes it? No. It isn't. It just tastes like chocolate milk. That's cool, right? Yes and no. I wanted a chocolate tea with Jasmine and Rooibos tea, as friggin' promised. I just got a white person's chocolate milk. We all know that white people are the worst, right? I mean, enjoy your mac and cheese, idiots.

To the six people that drank this that are not on my yacht, think twice next time I offer you something you can't read the label for that you saw three other people drink before you. It could be the thing that turns your life around. Now I'm sorry but I have to go put tanning oil on hot babes that aren't my wife. My wife is cool with it. She told me she was.



As I tend to do, I spoke too soon.

Nick said:


I was approached by Mike with a nod and a wink, which of course either meant it was time for an afternoon tryst... or time to sample a new beverage. As I do require continued employment and HR frowns on at-work conjugal relations, it was fortunately the latter.

The beverage in question was a bottle which was decidedly not labeled for sale in America, fully decked out in Asian-language glyphs. OK, we have a potential mouth party, here. Strap in, taste buds.

I did see one English word: chocolate. Now, chocolate for me can be a multi-layer extravaganza of flavors, or a cloyingly sweet abomination of which Hershey's would be proud. The first sip showed this drink leaned more towards the latter. Primary flavor: sweet. Meh. There's also a texture that says to me there's some milk or other form of emulsified fat going on here. It's feels a little creamy.

What followed was a flavor I can describe as not-hot hot chocolate. Yeah, you know... the cup of hot chocolate you made to warm up after snow-blowing the GD driveway for the second time today, only to be drawn away by a wife request for something that clearly would have been less time for her to just do herself, and then later re-discover your room-temp cup, and then remembering as you drink it that room-temp hot chocolate is not nearly as good, and become lost in a downward spiral of negative emotions. Maybe that's just me, though. OK, I'm exaggerating. It's not bad. It's just not *good*. I wouldn't seek it out for this part. Thus far, we're not looking at a beverage I'd actively seek out again.

Ah - but the last, lingering hit of background tastes (and aftertaste). There's something going on here. Putting a finger on it is nigh impossible, between OMG SWEET and the milky texture and the mild cocoa. But there's... something. A complex of multiple things, very subtle. I'd later learn this was tea and hibiscus. It could have been turmeric and turpentine for all I could tell; they're so muted. But it *was* pleasant.
Is the little blend of almost missed flavors enough to make this a repeat drink?

Nah. I think it would have benefited from those secondary flavors being brought forward more.

I'm happy to have sampled it, and I enjoyed drinking what I had, but no, I wouldn't buy one. I'd probably have a hit if it was given to me. Especially if it was from Mike... with that wink and nod.

Country
China
Sweetener
Sugar
Categories
Iced Tea, Milk
Rating
3/5
Reviewed By
Mike Literman on January 25th, 2019
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